Yorkie Doodle Dandy

by Belinda White

  Dang, but the man knew me.

  “Just make sure it gets added, please? We’re pretty much bare bones in the kitchen, and a man has needs, you know.”

  Yeah, give a man a hot dog and next, he’ll want a steak. Although, now that I thought about it, steak sounded pretty darn good. And they weren’t all that hard to fix if I used the grill out back. Another item to add to the list.

  He kissed the top of my head, looked in the fridge just in case some kind of breakfast food had magically appeared overnight, then left. Empty-handed. I think he did it just for show, but it worked all the same.

  Grocery shopping didn’t just make the list, it got the top billing.

  Well, top billing on the list, but there was a timing thing involved. For instance, the local stores didn’t open until nine through the week, and it would be another scorching hot day out today. Both of those combined meant that I needed to get those plants in the ground this morning.

  Why shower before and after? I grabbed my gardening gloves and went to work.

  Wouldn’t my mom be proud of me?

  THE PLANTING TOOK A little longer than I had planned. It was ten before I was satisfied that I’d done all dozen plants justice and given them their best shot in their new home. The shower took a bit longer, and by then the day had already turned into a steam fest.

  Shorts and a t-shirt it was. Not the most professional of attire, but it would have to do. A gal had needs too. Like not baking from the outside in.

  The next thing to cross off my list still wasn’t the store. I had to bypass that for the moment. A lot of things I wanted to buy would need refrigerated quickly in this heat, and I didn’t know how long my visit with Tanner would take. Better to not take chances.

  Because, yeah, I wanted to have a little chat with good old Leroy. Mabel might not be convinced he was the one behind the blackmail scheme, but I had my doubts as to his innocence. The man lived awfully well for someone on the county dole. Being a commissioner, from what I read in my research last night, really didn’t pay all that much.

  Certainly not enough to pay for the house in front of me. It rivaled Sapphire’s new digs, and that was saying something. A mini-mansion rather than a simple home.

  I walked slowly to the door, trying to think of a strategy. My mind still hadn’t come up with anything by the time I pressed the doorbell. With as fancy as the house was, I kind of expected a maid or shoot, maybe even a butler to answer. But no, it was the prim and proper, not a hair out of place, Mrs. Tanner herself.

  Her perfectly styled eyebrows raised as her eyes took me in slowly, from head to pink painted toenails. What can I say? It was sandal-wearing weather for sure. Toes had to breathe too. Well, sort of.

  I should have womaned up and worn my leather bounty hunting get up. People respected me when I was in my leather. Oh, sure, sometimes there was laughter at first. But that generally faded out fast when they caught a glimpse of my taser and handcuffs.

  “Can I help you?”

  “I hope so. I’m here to see Mr. Tanner about a matter of some urgency.”

  Only half of her lips went into a smile formation. The result was a little condescending. Okay, a lot condescending.

  “I see. Well, I’m afraid Leroy is out at the moment, but I handle a lot of his business. You can talk with me.” Her eyes took a closer look at my shoes, probably looking for dirt or something.

  She wouldn’t find any. These weren’t work shoes. They were for show shoes.

  “Won’t you come in?”

  That was a wrinkle in my plan. I really wanted to talk to Leroy, not Mrs. Tanner. How could I get a feel for him if I didn’t see him face to face? Still, at least I got in the front door. That was something.

  “When will Mr. Tanner be back?”

  She waved her hand. “Oh, it will be hours. He’s playing in a golf tournament today. Tomorrow too, most likely. I’m afraid you’re stuck with me. But I can assure you that I’m definitely the woman behind the man if you get my drift.”

  I took a closer look at her, then thought back to the last time I’d seen Leroy Tanner. There might be more than an ounce of truth in what she was implying. She looked all business. Leroy was more the playboy type.

  As I still hadn’t come up with a definite plan, I took a moment to look around as she led me to a sitting room. The room must have been where she did a lot of her business because it was decorated to impress. Did a pretty bang-up job of succeeding too.

  The furniture was all black leather, and in the corner was an antique desk. The kind that probably had secret compartments to hold the papers Tanner didn’t want to risk sharing with the world. Or, more to the point, the police in the event of a warrant. But what drew my eyes, as I’m sure they were meant too, were the pictures.

  Pictures on the wall, on the tables, and even on the broad limestone mantel over the fireplace. And every single one of them showing Leroy Tanner in a prominent position with a celebrity or person of power.

  Past presidents, television stars, you name it; they were represented well. Leroy Tanner got around.

  I still didn’t have a plan, and I was running out of time.

  “So, tell me. What do you need from Leroy?”

  All I could do was stall. After all, the only thing I needed from Leroy was a confession to trying to blackmail Mabel, and I was pretty sure she wouldn’t be willing to help me with that.

  “What do you think I want?”

  She smiled at me again, her whole lips getting into the act this time. You’d think that would make the smile more genuine. You’d think that. But you’d be wrong. “I’m sure I don’t know. But perhaps you wanted to put your bid in for one of the contracts that are coming open? The custodian contract for the courthouse, perhaps?”

  Part of me was offended. She thought I wanted to be a janitor? So much that I was willing to grease the wheels to get the job? But it was as good an excuse for being there as any. So I played along, even if it did try my acting abilities.

  “You’re great at reading people,” I said trying out a smile of my own.

  She shrugged. “You get that way after dealing with the public on a daily basis.” Then her eyes narrowed as she looked me in the eye. “That particular contract is quite popular, you know.” A slight pause to let that sink in. “What do you think you could bring to the table to make my husband put his vote toward you?”

  Talk about putting things right on the line. Mrs. Tanner was most definitely the woman behind the man.

  As for me? I decided to play dumb. “Well, I’m a hard worker, and I cleaned my mom’s thrift store for years. I know my way around keeping things neat and tidy. I really think I could make that courthouse shine.”

  Her smile was fading fast. “I see.” The struggle was real, and it showed right there on her face.

  Yeah, how could she be sure I wasn’t some kind of sting operation to take down her husband’s nice little enterprise?

  Finally, greed won out. “Well, I’ll have you know that my husband is as honest as the day is long.” I had to bite my tongue to keep from laughing on that one. “But he does sometimes take my feelings and research into consideration when he votes to award contracts.” She hesitated again. “I’d offer you something to drink, my dear, but I’m afraid my old refrigerator just isn’t keeping things as cold as it should. I’ve had my eye on one of those nice side by side models with the metallic finish to match my stove. But on a Commissioner’s salary? Well, it’s quite out of my price range, I’m afraid.”

  We’d just bought one of those very models when we moved into the barn. They weren’t cheap. Mrs. Tanner didn’t believe in playing around. But the message was fairly clear. If she got her refrigerator, I’d get the contract.

  Too bad for her I didn’t really want it.

  Chapter 6

  So that was kind of a dead end, other than the fact that now I was pretty dadgum sure that the Tanners were behind the doctored photographs. They just had too much to lose not to try so
mething.

  And yes, my mind kept going back to all those framed shots of Leroy and the power people. Some of them just seemed a little too unlikely to be real. The only question was, did they do the manipulation themselves? Or was there some kind of dealer involved?

  How good did one have to be to make a picture look believable? Was it something I could do?

  Once again, my mind went to Tommy Hill. Mabel would have a cow if I brought him into this, but what choice did I have? I was okay with computers, but only for the simple things. Mostly email and web surfing. I was awesome at online shopping. But using special software to mingle pictures? Not so much.

  If I got really lucky, maybe he could show me the ropes on how to use the software. Because right now, I wasn’t seeing a way to take the Tanner’s operation down that didn’t involve getting Mabel elected. And she’d only given me three days to come up with a solution.

  I would have to get creative. And I was nothing if not creative.

  I changed direction and headed to Mabel’s house. She should be safely out of the way at the library right now, and I really needed to catch Tommy alone for this one. I sat out in front of their house for a few minutes trying to figure out what to do. Finally, as much as I hated doing it, I tore the part of the picture with Mabel’s face off.

  Then I knocked on the door.

  Tommy was a little surprised when he opened it to find me standing there. We were old friends from high school, sure, but after all these years, we really didn’t spend much time together anymore. In fact, it was still a little surprise to me every time I did see him. Tommy Hill had been known as the fat geek back in the day.

  Fat no longer applied to him, although he still earned the geek part. But now, he was totally the hot geek. Mabel was one lucky woman to have captured him.

  But then, in my opinion, that luck ran both ways. Mabel was a fine catch herself.

  “Hey, Tommy. Did I catch you at a bad time?” I had to ask because it was now going on noon, and the man was still just in his pajama bottoms. His short pajama bottoms, I might add. And can I just say again that yes, Mabel was a very lucky gal indeed.

  “Hey yourself, Ruby.” He glanced behind me. “No Amie?”

  Why was it everyone assumed Amie would be with me? This whole being on my own experience was rather eye opening, to say the least. High time to work on my own independence.

  “No Amie, just me. I’ve got something I’m hoping you can help me with.”

  He swallowed, and color came to his cheeks. “I’m really hoping that help doesn’t require me to hack into anything. I don’t do that anymore, you know.”

  I nodded. “I know. Government still keeping tabs on you?”

  “You have no idea. I don’t think I can go to the bathroom without them knowing. So whatever you need, it has to be totally on the up and up.”

  What could I say to that? My plan wasn’t entirely on the up and up, but then did he really have to know that? I mean, I wasn’t going to ask him for help with that. He would just be my tutor. And it wasn’t against the law to manipulate images. If it was, the software wouldn’t be so readily available.

  “Can I come in?”

  He glanced behind him, then stepped aside to let me pass. I’d been to Mabel’s before. Not much had changed. Other than the hot new roommate, that is.

  He led us over to the couch. “Can I get you a pop or something?”

  I hated to drink their pop, but at the same time, I’d worked up a bit of a sweat on the ride over. The car’s air conditioning worked just fine, but not on two-minute rides. No time to cool off the vehicle in that time. Not with the sun blazing through the windshield.

  A minute later, we were sitting side by side on the sofa, sipping soda. Say that three times fast.

  “So, about that help?” Tommy asked.

  “Yeah, it’s a bit of an awkward situation.” I hesitated. Next came the tricky part. If Mabel found out that I’d come to Tommy, even without mentioning her, she would not be pleased. I didn’t want to tick off my very first client. Even if I wasn’t exactly getting paid for this.

  Finally, I pulled out the biggest of the two photos, minus the incriminating female face. But before I passed it on to him, I looked him dead in the eyes. “You have to swear to me that you won’t tell a single soul about this visit. Not even Mabel.” Shoot, especially Mabel, but I couldn’t really say that.

  He fidgeted. “I don’t have a problem with the secret part, though I’ll admit I don’t like keeping things from Mabel. But this is starting to sound like one of those can’t do it jobs I was talking about earlier.”

  “It’s not. Really.” I started to flip the picture over, then carefully thought about his words. Saying he didn’t have a problem with something wasn’t the same as giving me the swear I’d asked for. “So, do you swear to keep this just between me and you?”

  There was a second’s hesitation, but he nodded. It was enough to make me glad I’d taken that safety second step.

  I flipped the photo over. “I tore off the female’s face. You don’t need to see that, as it wasn’t real, anyway.”

  He glanced at the picture in front of him, and his eyebrows rose. “I don’t know, the rest of her looks pretty real to me. Pretty sure that body would come with a face attached to it.”

  “I’m sure it did. But trust me when I say it didn’t come with the face shown in the picture.”

  His eyes went from the photo to me. “Someone pasted your face into this?”

  Here’s the thing. I don’t like lying to my friends. So I shook my head. “No. Not me. But someone close to me.”

  “Amie?”

  I shook my head but didn’t say no. Amie would probably shoot me later, but I never once said it was her. I just didn’t exactly say it wasn’t. Tommy and I were friends. Good friends. But Tommy and Amie? They’d almost been a couple at one time. And I knew within reason that there wasn’t a whole lot Tommy wouldn’t do if he thought Amie needed help. Government or no.

  “I don’t want to say who. The point of the matter is that whoever did this is trying to blackmail... my friend.”

  His face hardened right before my eyes. “That’s not good. I’m not a fan of blackmail. At all.”

  “Me either. So, can you help me?”

  He thought for a minute, then nodded. “The people monitoring my computer might think I’ve suddenly taken an interest in porn, but I’m willing to risk that.”

  The photo went into a scanner, and he popped open his laptop. It was already booted up and ready. I really don’t think that laptop got much downtime. It’s how he made his living, after all. Even if none of us was quite sure what the government had him doing. At least they agreed to pay him for it.

  “This would be easier if I had the digital version of this photo, but we’ll see what we can do.” He starting pushing keys, and I watched over his shoulder.

  “What are you doing?”

  “A lot of the master photo manipulators out there are very proud of their work. They consider it almost an art form of its own. And sometimes it is. But anyway, as such, a lot of them sign their work. I’m going to blow up the image and see if I can find it.”

  That sounded promising. A minute later, Tommy was pointing at the screen. “There. See it?”

  I did. “Is that a unicorn?”

  He nodded. “Yup. I’ve seen that signature before. I know who this is.”

  “Who?”

  Tommy looked at me. Then he stammered. “Well, when I say I know who it is, I mean I know their work. They’re proud of it. But I can’t actually put a name to them.”

  I frowned at him. “Then how does this help us?”

  He shrugged. “Well, now that you put it that way, I guess it doesn’t.” He chewed on his lip. “Back in the day I could trace them down, but now...”

  “No. Absolutely not, Tommy Hill. I will not have you getting yourself into more trouble over this. We’ll find another way to deal with it.” I took a deep breath. “
Actually, I kind of have a plan. But I need to know how to do what they did. Put faces where they don’t belong. Is that something you could teach me to do?”

  He took a deep breath. And then another before answering. “I can give you the basics, but this kind of thing can take a while to get really good at.” One last deep breath. “It would be a lot faster if I just did it, but that would probably cross that very thin line they give me.”

  “Then that isn’t an option either. Just show me what you can, and I’ll take it from there.”

  He did. Three hours later, and I was a lot smarter when it came to photo manipulation software. Come to find out, it isn’t just the big-name expensive software. There are other options out there too. And some side options that make the whole process a lot easier.

  Like, did you know there is a free place online where you can go and completely remove the background from a picture? Neither did I. But now I do. And I plan on using it too. A lot.

  It was hard to keep still on the drive home. I now knew just enough to be dangerous, as Mom used to say. And I was totally itching to try out my new-found skills. This would be a fun diversion after all. I just wish I had a little more time to do it right.

  But I’d just have to make do with what I could do. Hopefully, that would be good enough.

  My thoughts were on overdrive as I wound down our long driveway and back to the barn. The plan was coming together.

  Then my heart about stopped as a cat dropped from a tree lining the drive and landed on my hood. The resulting swerve cost the car yet another scrape down the side. When I finally came to a dead stop, I was staring into Destiny’s eyes. The only thing separating us was a thin glass windshield.

  I jumped out of the car and stood staring at her with my fists on my hips. “What the bloody heck were you thinking? I could have killed you!”

  She tilted her head at me, licked a paw, and rubbed the back of her ear. Just another walk in the park for her, obviously. She took her time, but when she finally finished, she hopped off the hood and started sauntering toward the house. She didn’t get far before she looked over her shoulder to see if I was coming.