Peace of Infinity

by Maegan Abel

  It was inevitable that Evie would have sexual experience. She was a tactile person in most every cycle, so it wasn’t a surprise at all. That, however, didn’t make it any easier to swallow.

  I held onto hope this would be another step in bringing her around—not that sex was the most important thing, but any physical manifestation of our relationship would bring more of our connection to the forefront.

  And, let’s face facts, even if I didn’t think it would help, I’d still want to do it. There was nothing in the world that could affect me the way her body could.

  I needed to get my head straight, but I couldn’t help myself. I pulled out my phone and shot her a quick text.

  Me: Can’t stop thinking about you in that dress.

  I wondered if she’d go back to ignoring me as I went about my own day. Twenty minutes later, I received a response.

  Ev: Figured you would’ve been thinking about me out of it ;)

  Unable to help my smile at her use of an emoticon, I quickly replied.

  Me: Well, now I am…

  Ev: You had your chance last night, Officer. And trust me, I would’ve rocked your world right there on the side of the road.

  I groaned, adjusting my now painful erection as I thought about it. Without a doubt, sex with Evie would be amazing. I could imagine it and it blended with the memories I had of our previous cycles. Fuck, I needed a release.

  Me: Tomorrow night.

  I waited, wondering if she’d confirm our plans or make another excuse as to why it couldn’t happen. I actually expected the long pause this time.

  Ev: Depends. Are you still going to try to force me into more?

  That was all it took to piss me off. I tossed my phone aside before I said something I didn’t mean. I hated that she felt anything I was doing was meant to force her, but I wasn’t about to stop trying. If she would give in, just a little, she would feel it and I’d have her. Right now, she was spending so much time keeping her guard up, she wasn’t giving herself the chance to see how good it could be if she let me in.

  It would start coming back to her. I just had to stay focused on that. It always came back to her. There wasn’t any way to tell if it would be enough, but I had to keep hoping for the best. Grabbing my phone, I clenched my jaw again at her text before typing out my own.

  Me: I said we’d do things your way. I don’t like to repeat myself.

  There was another long pause. I probably ticked her off and I should care, but I was glad she was just as irritated as I was. Maybe that was immature, but I was frustrated. I hesitated and considered apologizing for coming across harsh, but she was the one who kept second-guessing us. My phone buzzed in my hand and I read the response.

  Ev: Fair warning. My way involves a lot of leaving before the sun comes up and only calling on weekends.

  Fuck buddies. I hated that phrase and of course, it was the first to pop into my head. A part of me wanted to demand we could only do this if we were exclusive, but that would just push her away. I would have to wait until after the first time, when she knew just how good it could be between us, and then I could try.

  God, I felt fucking pathetic. If she could just feel it… I shook my head. Swallowing any pride I might’ve had left, I typed.

  Me: I’ll take what I can get.

  I hated opening myself up in that way and telling her I was desperate for her, but fuck if it wasn’t the truth. The next text I received made things a lot more difficult. My entire body reacted to the picture of a lacy red thong on gray carpet. My phone beeped, but it took me a full minute to pull away from the picture to read the new text.

  Ev: Just in case you needed a preview of what my panties look like on the floor. You’ll just have to pretend it’s your floor instead of mine.

  I clicked the picture again and stared at the fabric, groaning. Fuck, she was good. Since I needed to shower before I went out with the guys, I decided to get a little revenge.

  After I stepped out of the water, I grabbed my towel, held it over the vital parts, and took a picture down my body. Before I could talk myself out of it, I sent the picture and went about drying off and getting dressed.

  When I didn’t hear back from her right away, I smirked. I was getting to her.

  Ev: I hate you.

  I laughed, feeling pretty proud of myself as I responded.

  Me: You want me.

  I was in a much better mood as I dropped onto my bed. I needed to get going or I would be late, but I didn’t want to stop talking to her. This was a rare opportunity and I wanted to use it to my advantage.

  Ev: Prove it.

  I frowned, trying to figure out exactly how I was supposed to prove she wanted me.

  Me: How would I go about doing that?

  Ev: Not abundant in brains, I see. It’s called creativity. You should try it some time.

  I tapped my phone with my thumb, shaking my head and fighting a smile. I could hear her voice saying that, picture the challenge in her eyes. I replied quickly.

  Me: I’m abundant where it counts.

  Ev: Again, prove it.

  Me: Come on over and I’d be happy to.

  Ev: I’m busy tonight. You’ll just have to enjoy Pamela Handerson in my absence.

  I sighed, the knock back burning more than it should. I tried not to let it show.

  Me: We keep to your weekends only, she and I will have a close relationship.

  Ev: Gross. Better not let anybody catch you doing that or they might call the police. Oh, wait. :P

  Me: Mmmm…I’ll just have to live with the visions of you being the one to catch me.

  Ev: Have a good night, Officer Perv.

  Me: Night, Beautiful.

  I’d been a distracted mess for the last several hours, to the point where even Dom was giving me shit. We were at the most popular bar on the boardwalk and I’d been trying to drown my need for Evie in alcohol. So far, it wasn’t working. Ditching the rest of our group, I found a spot at the bar, using the excuse of needing quicker access to the liquor.

  “If you drink any more tonight, you’ll still be drunk tomorrow when you’re with her,” Dom said, walking up behind me. I blinked at him as I tried to make sense of his words. “I’m cutting you off,” he laughed.

  I stared at my almost empty glass and frowned. Dropping my forehead to the bar in aggravation, I said, “I still can’t stop thinking about her.” I wasn’t really talking to Dom—hell, I didn’t even know if I meant to say the words out loud—but there they were.

  He was quiet longer than would’ve been normal and had I been sober, I may have actually realized something was going on.

  “Shit.” He started laughing and I looked up at him, following his gaze to the small stage where drunk ass bar bitches and all the guys trying to impress them had been singing horrible karaoke for the last hour or so. If one of our other buddies hadn’t been so set on getting into the panties of one of the bridesmaids from the bachelorette party, we would’ve moved on to a different bar.

  Now, I was glad we hadn’t.

  Evie was standing on the small stage with a girl wearing a shirt proclaiming she was a bridesmaid and they were both laughing as the other girl pointed toward someone in front of the stage. There were two empty chairs at a table where I assumed they must’ve been sitting. When the music started, Evie groaned out loud and the bachelorette party cheered. The other girl nudged Evie a few times, laughing as they lifted the microphones and started singing along with Beyonce’s Single Ladies.

  To say I was laughing my ass off at the irony was an understatement.

  As they sang, they started doing what I thought might be the dance that went along with the lyrics, but they looked absolutely ridiculous, and I loved every second of it. Watching Evie so uninhibited and free was like seeing a different version of her. I’d always loved that I had memories of her, and even when she was being stubborn and fighting me, I could see the other versions. Sometimes that was all that got me through the fighting for her part.


  In the best way, she was always all of them—they were all in there.

  The girls left the stage to a round of cheers from the tables at the front. Evie walked straight over and climbed onto the chair beside one of the few guys, laughing as he leaned in and said something in her ear. With a clearer shot of his face now, I recognized him. He sang earlier—a few times, if I remembered right. And now his arm was resting casually along the back of Evie’s chair.

  I started to move forward, not sure what I planned to say exactly, but a hand caught my arm. “Don’t go over there and cause a scene.” Dom was trying to be the voice of reason. “You’re drunk.”

  Nodding, I leaned back into my position against the bar. I needed a plan. I pulled out my phone, trying to come up with something witty to text her, but the DJ started talking, explaining the process of getting on the list to sing again. I’d ignored him all night, but the system was now automated, done from your phone via an app, and names appeared of the next three people on a few of the screens around the bar. Grinning, I downloaded the app and began to scroll the songs.

  “What are you doing?” Dom asked, sounding skeptical. He stared at my phone and started laughing. “Dude, she’s going to kick your ass.”

  “She might find it funny. She told me I needed to be creative, so I’m putting myself out there. It’s worth a shot,” I said, shrugging. We both looked over at the table again and I watched Evie pick up her drink, her eyes on the guy in a way that made my blood boil as she curled her tongue around the straw in her glass to pull it into her mouth. He leaned closer and Dom stepped in front of me, cutting off my view.

  “Maybe we should just go.” His forehead creased as he kept a hand on me. He was worried I would lose my shit and it was a possibility at this point. She blew me off tonight to fuck around with some other guy. That was bullshit. Plain and simple. I shook my head. Leaving definitely wasn’t an option—not unless Evie was coming with me. It was one thing to hear her say this was casual, but it was another to have proof.

  I turned my attention back to the phone, searching a specific word in the song list for karaoke and flipping through the options. It took a few minutes, but I found one I thought would get a good crowd reaction. I added a name to the list, hit enter, and chuckled to myself as I leaned back against the bar to wait.

  It didn’t take long before the name I’d entered came up on the screen. Evie wasn’t paying attention at first, too busy laughing with the tables around her, but eventually she looked over at the person singing. When she noticed my name queued at number two, she straightened her back as her gaze slid around the bar. I turned, keeping my head down and standing with the guys so I wasn’t in her direct line of sight. Dom sat on his stool, shaking his head.

  I glanced up when the song changed and Officer Fuck Weasel moved to the next spot, meaning I would be after the person performing now. I grinned.

  “Good luck,” Dom said through a chuckle and I lifted my chin. I wasn’t nervous, but there was also a good deal of alcohol coursing through me.

  I walked toward the stage, no longer hiding as Evie scanned the room again. When her eyes landed on me, she froze, her entire body tense. I looked away, took the microphone from the DJ, and spun it in my hand as he announced me. The women, especially those in the drunken bridal party, started screaming, and I couldn’t help but smirk.

  One thing I always had going for me in Hawk Bay was home field advantage. Most of these women either knew me from school, where I was a football player and had plenty of females chasing me, or as a local officer they all enjoyed watching as I walked by in my uniform. I was well aware of the stares I got on a regular basis, but I’d never done much to put myself in the spotlight as an adult.

  Until now, apparently.

  The music started, soft at first, and I nodded my head. The heavy beat hit and I started singing Jesus Jackson’s Running on Sunshine.

  I’d already rolled up the sleeves on my black dress shirt, so I popped a few buttons and took my time untucking it from my jeans as whistles and cheers practically drowned out my singing.

  As the song progressed, I jumped off the stage, thankful for good coordination, and wandered through the tables toward the bachelorette party. Choosing a tall redhead whose shirt told me she was the Maid of Honor, I offered a hand to help her off her stool. I moved my hips with the beat, resting my free hand low on her waist as she and the other women hooted and squealed. She ran her fingers over my stomach and I let my eyes flick to Evie for the first time since the song started. She looked amused, but there was a tiny undercurrent of jealousy burning in her eyes. At least, I hoped that’s what I was seeing.

  Our gazes locked and I took the few steps to Ev, pulling her from her chair without any real fight from her. The look in her eyes, the liquid fire, nearly made me forget we were in a room full of people. I struggled to keep my mind on the task of finishing the song. When the music faded out, I backed up, tugging her with me as I reached over my head and handed the mic back up to the DJ. There were more cheers and catcalls, but I didn’t pay a bit of attention. I fisted my hands in the thick mass of hair at the base of Evie’s head, tilted her face up, and took her mouth. I didn’t bother asking permission or waiting to give her a chance to second-guess whatever might happen. I didn’t even think. I just acted.

  And I felt her smile against my lips as she returned the kiss.

  When we broke apart, I leaned in to her ear. “You blew me off tonight to come to a bar to find someone less complicated to fuck.” It wasn’t a question. We both knew exactly why she was here. She didn’t reply and I continued, not worried about her reaction. “I don’t like to share you. In fact, I fucking hate it. Especially when you’re making me wait for you.” As I backed away, she looked right at me, her eyes wide, the dark pupils nearly swallowing the beautiful brown as she took two ragged breaths through parted lips.

  “Why are we still here?” she finally asked, and a part of me wanted to punch the air at the success of my plan. Instead, I just smiled.

  “My buddy Dom is my ride home,” I admitted, not sober enough yet to feel sheepish for my actions in approaching her and making a scene while intoxicated.

  “So, you are drunk,” she laughed and shook her head. “I need to check on Cara and make sure she’s good and I’ll drive you to your place if you’re ready.”

  Grinning, I lowered my hands to her ass and yanked her hips against mine so she could feel just how ready I was.

  After making sure Cara had a ride, I walked with Gavin out to my car. He wasn’t a sloppy drunk and I was grateful for that. I’d had my share of them throughout the years and they usually ended up being horrible lays. Thankfully, I had a feeling that wouldn’t be the case with Gavin. From what I’d seen, he didn’t do anything poorly.

  I was counting on that.

  The drive to his place was short and quiet. If it weren’t for the small movements of his fingers, I would’ve wondered if he’d passed out. Since his hand was resting against my thigh, I could feel every subtle change and the light patterns he was drawing against my skin were driving me mad. I wanted to speed, but I was already fighting to keep my focus. By the time Gavin directed me into his driveway, I felt completely wired. It had been too long.

  We got out of the car and he took my hand as we walked up to the porch. Pulling out his keys, he opened the door and guided me through in front of him. The light flipped on and then he was pressing me against the door to shut it and his lips were on mine. My hip seared with his touch and I distractedly registered the sound of keys hitting tile. The click of the lock behind me followed and I was off my feet a breath later. He shoved his hands under my dress to rest against my ass and I wrapped my legs around him as his mouth continued to claim mine. My fingers found his hair and hung on as if I could pull him closer while our bodies aligned in a way that made everything else disappear.

  One hand shifted and I gasped against his lips. At the movement of my panties and touch of his finger as h
e began tracing along the skin beneath, I almost whimpered. My body was already worked into such a state of want, his finger slid easily up to my clit and back again, teasing me and working me into a frustrated mess. He didn’t focus on any one area long enough for my liking and chuckled as I squirmed against him. His face lowered to my jaw, then my neck, still moving far too slowly, and I took matters into my own hands.

  Reaching between us, I tugged his shirt out of the way and made quick work of his belt. I didn’t want to give him the chance to rethink this or back out again. His mouth landed firmly on mine as I flipped open the button and yanked the zipper. Without hesitation, I reached in and wrapped my hand around him. He groaned into my mouth and his hips flexed, thrusting into my movement while sliding the teasing finger inside me.

  “Jesus,” I moaned, making it the first word from either of us since we left the bar. And that single word set off a fevered pace.

  Gavin growled, his teeth practically cutting into my lip as his finger disappeared. The sound invaded my mind and my hips jerked with the sensation of fabric ripping, but I didn’t have time to process any of that before he entered me.

  There was a moment, a split second that passed between us where everything tightened—our fingers, our bodies, every part of us.