Out of Goodbyes

by Gen Ryan

  “Sorry, had to get my mind right.”

  He leaned in and kissed me, taking the poorly wrapped present and potato salad from my hands. I had wrestled with the damn wrapping paper for twenty minutes. It looked like it got into a fight with a rabid cat. Ah well. I tried.

  “Mind right?” Levi raised his eyebrow. “You didn’t have to do this, by the way.” He held up the potato salad.

  “My mom taught me to never show up somewhere empty-handed.”

  I followed him as we walked through his house. It was different than I expected it’d be. With Levi being single and no kids, I guess I pictured some swanky bachelor pad. It wasn’t. It looked like a home. It was a nice-sized three-bedroom ranch, with modest furniture, and some pictures of his family lining the walls. It was endearing how much he loved his family. Growing up with just my mother, while I didn’t want for anything, I didn’t have family gatherings and things like this. It was just us. Until Parker. Then my mother took him in and made sure he never wanted for anything either.

  Now it was just me. I missed her something fierce.

  “It’s been a while since I met someone’s family. Just nervous, I guess.”

  Shrugging, Levi offered me a quick smile. “Don’t be nervous. They’ll love you. Expect one hundred questions, but they’re harmless. After Mandy, they are slightly overprotective of their little boy.” He laughed.

  “You’re the youngest?”

  “The baby. My sister hated me for a while, but now we’re really close,” he commented. He opened the refrigerator door, and the air cooled me. It was going to be hot today, and I was sure I was going to melt. I watched his muscles stretch against his shirt as he leaned into the fridge and took out a big cake.

  Taking a deep breath, I tried to calm my hormones that were screaming to jump his bones.

  Looking over the counter, I grinned at the Disney princess that decorated the cake.

  “It’s cute,” I commented.

  “Yeah. Abi’s obsessed with anything princess.” The way he spoke about his niece made my heart twist in my chest. Did he want kids? I did a quick glance around the house that was ready for a family. All he needed was a wife and kids.

  My mouth went dry, my palms started to sweat. I didn’t know why I was so friggin’ nervous, but all expectations brought on my anxiety.

  “You okay?” Levi moved toward me, his fluid motions slow and rhythmic. Just watching him calmed me, brought me a comfort I never knew existed.

  Searching my face for any indication of what I was struggling with, he frowned.

  “Do you want kids?” I blurted, my voice shaky and insecure.

  The tips of his lips curved into a slow smile. I shivered, my anxiety quickly replaced with desire as he looked at me like I was the greatest thing he had ever seen.

  “Always have. I bought this house hoping to fill it up one day. You?” He quirked his eyebrow.

  “Absolutely.” I smiled, wringing my hands.

  “Good.” He bounced away and started gathering the cake. “Mind grabbing your potato salad and present? I can’t carry all of it to the car.”

  “Of course.” Balancing the potato salad on my hip and the present in the palm of my hand, we walked outside.

  “Taking my truck okay? I can bring you back here after to grab your car. Or you can stay over. Whatever’s easier.” His face was bright as he smiled at me, clicking the key fob on his truck to unlock the door.

  “Sounds perfect.” After securing the potato salad and present in the back seat, I slid into the front seat.

  “You ready?” Levi took my hand in his.

  I looked at him, my anxiety melting away. It could have been the heat, but I knew it had something to do with this man in front of me.

  “With you, I’m ready for anything.”

  He kissed the base of my hand, and we drove off, leaving my anxiety behind us.

  ***

  When you think of meeting your boyfriend’s family for the first time, there are all sorts of scenarios that go through your mind. You fall flat on your face. They hate you just because you stole their boy away. Or his niece runs in the opposite direction and calls you an ugly toad.

  No, just me?

  Well, none of that happened. I thought they might actually like me.

  “They love you.” Levi leaned in and whispered in my ear. My body responded, and I scooted closer to him.

  “Yeah?” I looked at his mother and father, who were holding hands and giggling. They were the most adorable thing I had ever seen. Zoe, his sister, stood over her husband, Jackson, as he manned the grill. She was saying something to him, and he leaned in and kissed her to shut her up. Her shoulders loosened, and she stormed toward us and plopped down at the table.

  “I hate when he just kisses me and then I can’t yell at him.” Zoe sighed.

  “Tough life,” Levi said with a laugh.

  “Looks like you have a tough life too.” She smiled as she looked down at our intertwined hands.

  “It’s a great life.”

  Zoe made a gagging sound before we all broke into laughter. “You deserve it, brother. Even though I wanted to be an only child, getting saddled with you as a little brother doesn’t suck so bad.”

  “Geez, thanks.” Levi rolled his eyes.

  “What about you, Rainey? How many brothers and sisters do you have?” Zoe swiped a potato chip from the basket and started munching.

  “Just me.”

  “Well, now you have us.” She patted my free hand.

  Levi kissed my temple, and I couldn’t help the contented sigh that escaped me.

  Levi and Zoe kept chatting, and I listened to them bicker back and forth. It was humorous to watch Levi get frazzled when he was normally so calm.

  My cell phone buzzed in my pocket, and I unclasped my hand from Levi’s. Private Number showed on the screen, and I hit Ignore, placing the phone on the table. I checked again a few minutes later, noticing they’d called a few times. There was no message, so whoever it was mustn’t have wanted to speak to me that bad.

  “Everything okay?” Levi asked.

  “Perfect.” I brushed a chaste kiss to his lips.

  “Gag. All right. Water fight time.” Zoe’s eyes twinkled with excitement.

  Levi groaned. “No.”

  “Why not? Scared I’ll show you up in front of your girlfriend?” She jumped up and ran toward the garage.

  Jackson came toward us, holding a tray of food.

  “Lunch is ready and she’s starting the water fight now?” Jackson groaned, and I laughed.

  “Better not say anything. Zoe’s the boss,” Levi teased.

  “She is.” Jackson covered the food.

  “By the way, why does your wife still act like she’s five?” Levi asked as he stood and started stretching.

  “Keeps things exciting.” Jackson grinned as he shook his head.

  “Are you stretching?” I laughed.

  “Yup. I can’t let her win.” He pulled me up off the chair. “This is a serious family matter. You get bragging rights until the next party.”

  “Nope! Hands off Rainey. Girls against boys.” Zoe shoved a bathing suit and face paint in my hands. “Here. Levi said you didn’t bring one. You can’t miss out of the famous Hayes water fight. Oh, and the paint is for your face. Have to look the part!”

  Levi’s mother and father were preparing as they strapped on water guns and got buckets of water balloons. The kids started dragging out Super Soakers and passing them out. Abi was standing in the middle of the lawn with war paint on her face, a big bright smile accentuating her blue eyes. She looked so adorable in her tutu bikini, her pudgy belly poking out.

  Then she opened her mouth and let out a war cry, a few of the others joining in.

  I wasn’t so sure about this.

  “You ready to lose, Raindrop?” Levi had taken off his shirt, his lean stomach glistening in the sun. My eyes lingered over his body before ending on his mouth, which was stretched into a
wide smile. I couldn’t take my eyes off him.

  Taking the water gun out of his hand, I gave it a quick pump, my eyes pinned on his.

  “Game on, sweetheart,” I teased. “Get ready to go down.” Zoe laughed and slapped my shoulders.

  “I like her. She’s a keeper.”

  I gulped and excused myself to the bathroom to change. Everything about this day wasn’t how I imagined it. I wasn’t just falling in love with Levi, I was falling in love with his family too.

  Glancing at myself in the mirror, I smiled as I pulled my hair into a ponytail.

  Zoe gave me a two-piece bathing suit. I wasn’t one to typically show that much skin, but I turned around and actually liked how my ass looked in it. It was a sports top, thank God, so my boobs wouldn’t fall out as I ran. Because we were going to win.

  I pumped my water gun, feeling badass as I spread two black lines under my eyes.

  “Let’s kick some ass.” I laughed as I hurried outside, my war cry joining with the others as I got pelted with water.

  Chapter Twelve

  Levi

  Zoe and Rainey were hiding behind the play set. The sun was causing sweat to bead on my forehead, and I wiped it away with the back of my hand, holding in my laughter. Rainey’s giggles carried over the sound of everyone else’s. She sucked at being stealthy.

  Perfect opportunity to catch her.

  Her back was to me, and I quietly moved toward her with a water balloon clutched in my hand.

  Good to know that my years of military service can be applied to the real world.

  Rainey and Zoe spun around, their eyes sparkling with excitement.

  “Now!” they both yelled simultaneously. I felt a huge blow to the top of my head. Water cascaded down my body. Glancing up, a bright-eyed and giggly Abi danced around at the top of her playset.

  “I got you, Uncle Levi!” Rainey and Zoe high-fived as I wiped the water off my face.

  “You’re done for!” I laughed. “Jackson, come get your wife!” I called. Rainey and Zoe took off in a sprint. It was cute that she thought she could outrun me. She had no chance. Jackson ran after Zoe, catching her effortlessly and peppering her with kisses.

  I’d give it to Rainey, she put up a good fight. She hid behind the swings and keep pushing them toward me to keep me from barreling forward and snagging her.

  “Stop playing hard to get, Rainey. Just surrender,” I teased.

  “Never!” she screeched as she tried to run past me. I wrapped my arms around her waist, and we both fell to the ground in a fit of laughter.

  We lay side by side, our chests heaving from running and laughing. She reached out and laced her fingers through mine.

  “Thank you,” she whispered, still staring up at the sky.

  “For what?” I turned on my side so I was facing her. She turned and faced me, our noses only inches apart.

  “For bringing me here. Not giving up on me. Helping me claw out of myself. I feel so alive.”

  I brushed my hand across her cheeks as she closed her eyes, a single tear falling.

  “Hey, none of that.”

  “It’s a happy tear. Nothing could ruin the happiness I feel.” She smiled.

  I sat up just as Jackson ran past and placed a water balloon in my hand. I cracked it over Rainey’s head, and she squealed.

  “Still happy, sweetheart?” I laughed as she gaped at me.

  Rainey narrowed her eyes at me, and I thought maybe I had overstepped and finally managed to piss her off. Tackling me to the ground, she pinned me with her thighs and kissed me.

  I swear to God, if we weren’t at my niece’s birthday party I’d have had my way with her right there underneath the swing set. After all, it was my fantasy. Water streamed down her face, intertwining with our kiss.

  “Still happy,” she murmured against my lips. Those words were the sweetest things I ever heard. And I felt my own happiness soar and my love for her grow even more.

  ***

  The day turned into night, and the birthday party died down. There was just Rainey and me left with Jackson and Zoe. I watched Rainey as she held a sleeping Abi in her arms. Humming, she rocked her, the smile never leaving her face.

  “She’s a natural,” Zoe said as she wrapped her arm underneath mine.

  “Mmm,” I murmured, never taking my eyes off her. Watching her hold my niece who was getting way too big to be held made me think of what she’d look like holding our own children.

  That would be the life.

  “You going to marry her?” my sister asked.

  “She’s still married.” I grunted. The thought of her still being attached to Parker in any way was a hard pill to swallow. If the damn asshole would stop dodging her calls, me marrying her wouldn’t be so far-fetched.

  When she wasn’t with me, I missed her. Even on my days off, I showed up at the hospital just to see her smile—and to bring her coffee. That earned me some extra brownie points.

  “Semantics.” Zoe gripped my arm tighter. “She loves you, you know? The way she looks at you. She’s got it bad.” I looked down at her, and she grinned.

  “I got it bad too.” I rubbed my hand over my chest.

  What was this woman doing to me? Everything I’d had with Mandy seemed like a child playing house compared to what I knew Rainey and I could have. My house would become a home, the lonely nights of sitting on my couch and flipping through mindless TV filled with her laughter and kisses. That’s all I ever wanted. Now, I knew who I wanted to share the rest of my life with.

  “Zoe?” Jackson said softly from behind us. We turned to face him as he looked at his wife with softness in his eyes. I adored how much Jackson loved my sister. “We should put Abi to bed.”

  Zoe nodded and took Jackson’s hand as we all walked over toward Rainey.

  “Here, let me take her and put her to bed.”

  Rainey reluctantly let Abi go, a sigh escaping her lips as Zoe and Jackson walked away with her.

  “She felt so good in my arms. So peaceful,” Rainey said, looking at the ground.

  “You’ll make a good mom,” I commented, brushing a kiss on her forehead.

  Her cell phone danced on the table, and she snatched it up, letting out an exasperated sigh.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “A private number keeps calling and not leaving a message.” She frowned.

  “So, answer it.” I shrugged. “Never know if it’s something important.”

  With a sigh she answered, her eyes widening.

  “Yes. This is she.” Her eyes found mine, and she bit her bottom lip as tears welled up in her eyes. Whatever this was wasn’t good.

  “Okay. I’ll be there as soon as I can.” Slamming her phone on the table, she brought her hand to her neck, and I knew something was wrong.

  “What is it?” I asked.

  “It’s Parker. He’s been arrested. I need to go to him.”

  My mind whirled with thoughts. Go to him? I bit back my sarcastic comments and nodded. As she stood up, I placed my hand on the small of her back.

  “I’ll bring you.”

  She stopped and shuffled her feet, unable to look me in the eyes. “No. I need to go alone.”

  Placing my hand under her chin, I lifted her face to mine, searching for any indication of what she was thinking and feeling. There was nothing. Just a void expression that left me hurt and confused. All day she’d been so full of life; now she was blank and emotionless, and it fucking scared me.

  Don’t go, my wonderful girl. Don’t let him steal your happiness.

  “I’ll tell my sister we’re heading out.” I ran inside and said goodbye on both our behalf. Zoe knew something was wrong and kissed my cheek, offering words of reassurance.

  “Don’t give up on her, Levi. Trust her. She’s your soul mate. I know it.” Zoe offered me a smile.

  I ran my fingers through my hair. “I hope so” was all I could say in return.

  We made it to my house in record time, the silence su
ffocating as Rainey stared out the window the entire time. There was no hand-holding. No stolen glances. Just the painful memory of the happiness that now seemed nonexistent.

  I walked her to her car, taking her hand and squeezing it in mine.

  “Levi, I….” Rainey’s eyes welled up with tears. Pressing my fingers against her mouth, I halted her words.

  “Don’t say anything. Go do what you need to do.” I leaned down and brought my mouth to hers, her sob touching my lips.

  I stood in my driveway, watching her drive off. Bile churned in my stomach, everything I’d eaten threatening to come up. I tried to heed my sister’s advice and trust Rainey, but letting her leave broke me. I looked up at the sky; the clouds hid the stars. I was enveloped in darkness. She had to come back to me. This couldn’t be it for us. Because I loved her, and while the words hadn’t been spoken yet, part of me knew she loved me too.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Rainey

  I’d never stepped foot in a police station before. The lights were oppressive as they blared down on me, unforgiving and relentless. My heart felt like it was in my stomach. Each step I took on the tiled floor was loud, setting my nerves even more on edge. I didn’t know what I was walking into or what condition I’d find Parker in, and that terrified me.

  “Excuse me?” One of the officers looked up at me, his name badge reading Banks. “I’m here about my husband, Parker Matthews.” I choked on the word husband. We were anything but husband and wife, but I had to keep up the pretense to get the information I needed.

  “Ah yes. Mr. Matthews. He’s been rather combative tonight. Drunk off his ass,” Officer Banks muttered as he typed on the computer.

  “He’s been booked for assault and battery and resisting arrest. Bail is set at $2,500.” My eyes widened.

  “Assault and battery?” I questioned.

  “Yep. Your dashing husband decided to get piss drunk and punch some guy’s lights out.”

  I gasped. That wasn’t like the Parker I knew at all.

  I brought my hand to my cheek, remembering the feeling of his elbow connecting with it. I thought of how he tried to punch Levi. Maybe this was the new Parker. He had become a different man than I married.