The Vnfortunate Traveller, or The Life Of Jack Wilton

by Thomas Nash

they receiue all theirwater round about the citie, He tice all the yong children into my housethat I can get, and cutting their throates barrell them vp in poudringbeefe tubbes, and so send them to victuall the popes galleyes. Erethe officers come to extend, Ile bestowe a hundred pound on a doale ofbread, which Ile cause to bee kneaded with Scorpions oy le that maykill more than the plague. Ile hire them that make their wafers orsacramentarie gods to minge them after the same sort, so in the zealeof their superstitious religion, shall they languish and droup likecarrion. If there be euer a blasphemous coniurer, that can call thewindes from their brazen caues, and make the cloudes trauell beforetheir time, Ile giue him the other hundred pounds to disturbe theheauens a whole weeke together with thunder and lightning, if it bee fornothing but to sowre all the wines in _Rome_, and turne them to vinegar.As long as they haue either oyle or wine, this plague feedes butpinglingly vpon them.

  _Zadoch, Zadoch_ said Doctor _Zacharie_, (cutting him off) thouthreatenest the aire, whiles wee perish heere on earth. It is theCountesse _Iuliana_ the Marquesse of _Mantuaes_ wife and no other, thathath complotted our confusion. Aske not how, but insist in my words, andassist in reuenge.

  As how, as how, said _Zadoch_, shrugging and shrubbing. More happie thanthe Patriarches were I, if crusht to death with the greatest torments_Romes_ tyrants haue tride, there might be quintessenst out of me onequart of precious poyson. I haue a leg with an issue, shall I cut itoff, and from his fount of corruption extract a venome worse than anieserpents? If thou wilt, Ile goe to a house that is infected, wherecatching the plague, and hauing got a running sore vpon me, Ile comeand deliuer her a supplication, and breathe vpon her. I know my breathstinkes so alreadie, that it is within halfe a degree of poyson. Ile payher home if I perfect it with any more putrifaction.

  No, no brother _Zadoch_ answered _Zacharie_, that is not the way.Canst thou prouide mee ere a bondmaide, indued with singular & diuinequalified beautie, whome as a present from our synagogue thou maistcommend vnto her, desiring her to be good and gracious vnto vs.

  I haue, I am for you quoth _Zadoch_: _Diamante_ come forth. Heeres awench (said he) of as cleare a skin as _Susanna_, shee hath not a wemmeon her flesh from the soale of the foote to the crowne of the head: howthinke you master doctor, will shee not serue the turne?

  She will, said _Zacharie_: and therefore Ile tell you what charge Iwould haue committed to her. But I care not if I disclose it onely toher. Maid, (if thou beest a maid) come hether to mee, thou must be sentto the countesse of _Mantuaes_ about a small peece of seruice, wherebybeing now a bond woman thou shalt purchase freedome, and gaine a largedowrie to thy marriage. I know thy master loues thee derely though heewill not let thee perceiue so much, hee intends after hee is dead tomake thee his heire, for he hath no children: please him in that I shallinstruct thee, and thou art made for euer. So it is, that the pope isfarre out of liking with the countesse of _Mantua_ his concubine,and hath put his trust in me his phisition to haue her quietly andcharitably made away. Now I cannot intend it, for I haue manie cures inhand which call vpon me hourely: thou if thou beest plac'd with her asher waiting maid or cup-bearer, maist temper poyson with her broth, hermeate, her drinke, her oyles, her sirrups, and neuer bee bewraid. I willnot say whether the pope hath heard of thee, and thou maist come to beehis lemman in her place, if thou behaue thy selfe wisely. What, hastthou the heart to go thorough with it or no? _Diamante_ deliberatingwith her selfe in what hellish seruitude she liu'd with the Jew, andthat she had no likelihood to be releast of it, but fall from euill toworse if she omitted this opportunitie, resigned her selfe ouer whollyto be disposed and emploid as seemed best vnto them. Therevpon, withoutfurther consultation, her wardrop was richly rigd, her tongue smoothfil'd & new edg'd on the whetstone, her drugs deliuerd her, andpresented she was by _Zadoch_ her master to the countesse, together withsome other slight new-fangles, as from the whole congregation, desiringher to stand their merciful mistresse, and sollicite the Pope for them,that through one mans ignorant offence were all generally in disgracewith him, and had incurred the cruell sentence of losse of goods and ofbanishment.

  _Iuliana_ liking wel the pretie round face of my black browe _Diamante_,gaue the Jew better countenance than otherwise she would haue done,and told him for her owne part shee was but a priuate woman, and couldpromise nothing confidently of his holines: for though he had suffredhimselfe to bee ouerruled by her in some humors, yet in this that tutchthim so nerely, she knew not how he would be enclind: but what lay in hereither to pacifie or perswade him they should be sure of, and so crau'dhis absence.

  His backe turnd, shee askt _Diamante_ what countrey woman she was,what frends she had, and how shee fell into the hands of that Jew? Sheanswered, that she was a _Magnificoes_ daughter of _Venice_, stolne whenshe was yong from her frends, and sold to this Jew for a bondwoman, who(quoth she) hath vsde me so iewishly and tyrannously, that for euer Imust celebrate the memorie of this day, wherein I am deliuered from hisJurisdiction. Alas (quoth she deep sighing) why did I enter into aniemention of my owne misusage? It will be thought that that which I am nowto reueale, proceeds of mallice not truth. Madam, your life is sought bythese Jewes that sue to you. Blush not, nor be troubled in your minde,for with warning I shall arme you against all their intentions. Thusand thus (quoth she) said doctor _Zacharie_ vnto me, this poyson hedeliuered me. Before I was cald in to them, such and such consultationthrough the creuise of the dore fast lockt did I heare betwixt them.Denie it if they can, I will iustifie it: onely I beseech you to befauorable Ladie vnto me, and let me not fall againe into the hands ofthose vipers.

  _Iuliana_ said little but thought vnhappely, onely she thankt her fordetecting it, and vowed though she were her bond woman to be a mothervnto her. The poyson she tooke of her, and set it vp charily on a shelfein her closet, thinking to keepe it for some good purposes: as forexample, when I was consumed and worne to the bones through her abuse,she would giue me but a dram too much, and pop mee into a priuie. Soshee had seru'd some of her paramours ere that, and if God had not sent_Diamante_ to be my redeemer, vndoubtedly I had drunke of the same cup.

  In a leafe or two before was I lockt vp: heere in this page the foresaidgoodwife Countesse comes to me, shee is no longer a iudge but a client.How she came, in what manner of attyre, with what immodest and vncomelywords shee courted me, if I should take vpon me to enlarge, all modesteares would abhorre me. Some inconuenience she brought me too by herharlot-like behauiour, of which inough I can neuer repent me.

  Let that bee forgiu'n and forgotten, fleshly delights could not make herslothfull or slumbring in reuenge against _Zadoch_. Shee set men abouthim to incense and egge him on in courses of discontentment, andother supervising espialls, to plye followe and spurre for-warde thosesuborning incensers. Both which playd their parts so, that _Zadoch_ ofhis own nature violent, swore by the arke of _Iehoua_ to set the wholecitie on fire ere he went out of it. _Zacharie_ after he had furnishtthe wench with the poyson, and giu'n her instructions to goe to thediuell, durst not staye one houre for feare of disclosing, but fled tothe Duke of _Burbon_ that after sackt Rome, & there practised with hisbastardship all the mischief against the pope and _Rome_ that enuiecould put into his minde. _Zadoch_ was left behinde for the hangman.According to his oath, he prouided balls of wilde fire in a readines,and laid traines of gunpouder in a hundred seuerall places of the citieto blow it vp, which hee had set fire too, as also bandied his ballsabroad, if his attendant spies had not taken him with ye manner. To thestraightest prison in _Rome_ he was dragged, where from top to toe hewas clogd with fetters and manacles. _Iuliana_ informed the pope of_Zacharies_ and his practise, _Zachary_ was sought for, but _non estinuentus_, he was packing long before. Commaundement was giu'n, that_Zadoch_ whom they had vnder hand and seale of locke and key, should beexecuted with all the fiery torments that could be found out.

  He make short worke, for I am sure I haue wearied all my readers. To theexecution place was he brought, where first and formost he was stript,then on a sharp
e yron stake fastened in the ground, had he his fundamentpitcht, which stake ran vp along into his bodie like a spit, vnder hisarme-hoales two of like sort, a great bonfire they made round about him,wherewith his flesh rosted not burnd: and euer as with the heate hisskinne blistered, the fire was drawne aside, and they basted him witha mixture of Aqua fortis, allam water, and Mercury sublimatum, whichsmarted to the very soule of him, and searcht him to the marrowe. Thendid they scourge hys backe parts so blistered and basted, with burningwhips of red hot wire: his head they noynted ouer with pitch andtarre, and so enflamed it. To his priuie members they tied streamingfierworkes, the skinne from the crest of his shoulder, as also from hiselbowes, his huckle bones, his knees, his ankles they pluckt and gnawdoff with sparkling pincers: hys breast and his belly with seale skinsthey grated ouer, which as fast as they grated & rawed, one stoode ouerand lau'd with smithes cindry water and _aqua vito_: his