Misjudged

by Sarah Elizabeth

  “Back inside?” I ask between breaths as I lean back against the wall. “He was—”

  “Intimate with a criminal, Alex,” he begins teasing me as he walks over, with an overly large smirk now appearing over his face. “You do know someone died from the drugs he supplied them, don’t you? Oh man, this is too fucking funny!” He lets out a cruel laugh, which makes me question my own sanity as to why I ever dated this guy.

  “Shut up, you asshole!” I spit at him as I push myself off of the wall, “You’re full of shit!” I call back over my shoulder, and walk across the grass as he slinks up behind me.

  “Go ahead and ask around!” He calls after me. “Did you see him denying it?” Ugh!

  Instead of walking to class, I take a detour and sit myself down on one of the benches located just around the corner from my building. There’s no way I can concentrate in class from everything that has just happened, so it would be a complete waste of time turning up at all this morning.

  As I inhale the cold air, my eyes land over by the gates, and that’s when I see Brandon standing there alone. He has his back to me, and I watch him as I try to sift through my thoughts. I keep my eyes on him as he paces in front of the gates, and then avert my eyes over to a couple of guys who are just walking in. They head towards Brandon, and I watch as the three of them stand together, seemingly in deep conversation. One of the guys is waving his arms in the air and looking frustrated, while Brandon’s shoulders appear to slouch. I keep watching, wondering what’s going on, and then I see it.

  One of them hands something over to Brandon, and I watch as he slips the small, brown package underneath his jacket, as the other two look around. It’s almost as though they’re checking to see if the coast is clear for whatever it is they’re doing. Brandon grabs something from his pants’ pocket, and appears to be saying something else to them before he gives it to the taller guy of the two. Then that’s it. The men head back through the gates, and get into a black car before it speeds away.

  Did I just witness an exchange? Dammit! Was Matt telling the truth?

  “What are you doing out here? Haven’t you got class?” My attention is drawn away from Brandon, and over to my right, where Alyssa is fast approaching. “Alex, what’s wrong?” She leans down and rubs my shoulder gently, as her face fills with concern.

  “Nothing … Everything!” I shake my head and feel the tears brimming again. I’m never like this. “Alyssa, how much do you know about Brandon?”

  She looks confused, and she’s eyeing me speculatively as she takes a seat beside me, “Why? Has he done something?”

  “I need you to promise that you won’t breathe a word to anyone. I mean it, not even to Neil or Ryan,” I look her in the eyes and watch as she shoots me a quizzical look.

  “I promise,” she looks worried, and I can see she’s paying me her full attention. Usually Alyssa comes to me for advice when she’s upset, not the other way around. “Alex, did he do something?”

  “He’s the guy from the ball,” my voice cracks a touch, and I see her mouth falling open, while shock enters her eyes. “Can we go and get some coffee?”

  ***

  It took Alyssa a few minutes to take in everything I told her while we sat with our coffees. She’s a motor mouth sometimes, but she can keep some things to herself when she needs to, and this is unquestionably one of those times. I told her everything. I told her every single detail, from when I arrived at the ball, right up until she joined me on the bench just a little while ago.

  She admitted to having heard the rumors about Brandon’s past, and that people have said he’s been inside, but she’d brushed them off because Neil and Ryan never mentioned anything to us. Now though, she seems just as concerned as I am.

  I’ve been running things repeatedly through my mind, ever since Alyssa went to class at eleven, so I guess for about the past six hours now. When Alyssa agreed that things didn’t seem right with him, it made me feel nauseous and unable to think about anything else, so I chose to take the rest of the day off from class too.

  Neil is supposed to be cooking tonight, and I thought that he, Ryan, and Alyssa would have been back by now. I’m sure their last class finished at four today.

  My cell phone springs to life on the breakfast bar, and when I check it, I see a new message from Neil flashing on my screen.

  Meet us by the gates at 6. We’re going out 4 dinner!

  Any reason to get out of cooking dinner and he’ll find one. I roll my eyes as I message my reply, telling him I’ll be there, and then I go to get myself freshened up and changed into something more suitable. If we’re eating out, I don’t honestly think my jogging bottoms and tank top will work somehow. I should have asked where we’d be dining so I could have dressed accordingly, but I figure that since it’s a Wednesday evening then a pair of skinny jeans, a sweater, and my favorite pair of calf-high brown leather boots will be suitable.

  Neil and Ryan are waiting by the gates as I make my way down the pathway, and they wave when they see me approaching them.

  “Where are we eating?” While observing the wide grins over both of their faces, I’m beginning to think there’s more going on here than just dinner. “Why do I get the feeling you guys might be celebrating something?” I narrow my eyes on them as they both glance devilishly at one another.

  “That’s because we are,” Neil smiles brightly as he wraps his arm around my shoulders. “We may have a gig lined up for this Saturday.”

  I feel my delight growing at their news, “That’s awesome!” I answer as we begin walking down the street. “Where are we eating? You never told me.”

  “We thought we’d kill two birds with one stone,” Ryan answers, as he walks to the left of me while fiddling around on his cell phone. “We’re going to eat and organize it at the same time.”

  We head down the second block, and I start slowing my pace when I realize they’re no longer beside me. I turn around to see Neil holding a door open, and then feel my stomach drop to the floor.

  “We’re eating here?” I try not to make my dismay known as the words leave my mouth, but my voice betrays me. I sound like a freaking chipmunk. I hadn’t realized the bar we’re about to walk held band nights.

  “It looks like good food, and Brandon spoke to his boss about lining us up to play,” Ryan beams as he steps inside, and I hesitantly walk in after him, with Neil following closely behind.

  “Is Alyssa joining us?” I ask as we take a seat at the bar. “Is she and Seth back on?” I hadn’t even asked her what was going on with the two of them because I was so wrapped up in myself, and I’m starting to feel a little bad about it.

  “She just messaged me and said she’s a couple of minutes away,” Ryan smiles, although the smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes. That’s strange. Only a few minutes ago he was almost bouncing off of the walls with happiness.

  “What do you want to drink?” Neil asks as the bartender comes over to take our order.

  “Diet Coke, please,” I request, and feel relieved when I scan the room and bar area to find that Brandon’s nowhere in sight. It must be his night off, which I’m feeling highly pleased about.

  It’s quiet in here, although there are a few other people eating at the tables around us. It’s a different atmosphere compared to when I was last here, and thankfully, the dancing pole is unoccupied this time around.

  “Let’s go grab a table,” Ryan tilts his head over to the far corner, and I’m seriously starting to wonder what has gotten into him all of a sudden. He hasn’t been the same since I saw him on his cell phone when we were on our way over here.

  “Hey, are you okay?” I shoot him a worried look as I take my seat, “You’ve gone all, well, grumpy on us!” I laugh out, trying to lighten the mood, but it doesn’t seem to be working.

  “Yeah …” He’s grinding his jaw and looking pissed, so I think I’ll just scan the menu instead of trying to make any more conversation with him for now.

  It’s not
normal for Ryan to be like this. He’s usually so laid back and easy going, but I’m sure that if he needs to talk, he knows we’re here for him.

  Once Alyssa had arrived, we ordered our food and both she and I decided to stay and wait around for the guys to finish their meeting. They were summoned into the back by one of the female bartenders a little over a half hour ago, and Ryan seemed to perk up after he’d eaten something. The food here is wonderful, and now that it’s almost nine o’clock, more people are appearing through the entrance doors.

  “Don’t look now …” Alyssa nods over towards the bar, and when I turn to see what she’s talking about, Brandon’s making his way behind and carrying a few crates of beer. “Do you feel any better after what happened today?”

  “I don’t know,” I turn back around and take a deep breath. The logical thing to do would be just to ask him. “Do you think that we should maybe ask Neil and Ryan?”

  I see her eyes narrowing, but I don’t think it’s at the question I just asked her. I turn in my seat again and see a woman, possibly in her late twenties, tapping Brandon on the shoulder. I watch him as he turns to face her, and see a wide smile appearing over his face. She walked behind the bar, but she’s not wearing the same uniform as any of the other employees. I observe her flicking her hair behind her shoulder, and notice that she’s wearing an even bigger grin on her face than he is. She leans closer towards him and says something, before he throws the bar cloth he was holding down onto the bar, and then follows her out the back.

  “It’s his loss, Alex,” Alyssa places her hand over mine and squeezes it gently as a look of sympathy washes over her face. I take a deep breath and decide to try and forget about him.

  He likes his women. He sleeps around a lot. He told me that what we did didn’t mean anything, and if my suspicions serve me rightly, he’s an ex-convict and drug dealer who practically killed someone in the process. Yeah, he’s quite the catch.

  I shake my head and feel my shoulders drop as I draw to the conclusion that I’m being ridiculous. Alyssa said that I could be feeling an attraction towards him for the simple reason that he’s the first guy I trusted with my body, and although it felt amazing at the time, it wasn’t the guy that I found attractive, it was the thought of him.

  We sit and talk about how both our classes are going, until Neil and Ryan come back to join us from their meeting.

  “And?” I raise my eyebrows, and can see from both of their faces that it’s good news.

  “Saturday night we have a two hour set!” Neil answers enthusiastically, and both Alyssa and I jump up and hug them both as we congratulate them. “Are you guys ready to head home?”

  We all agree and make our way towards the exit, when from the corner of my eye, I see Brandon walking over to us.

  “Congrats, guys!” He smiles at them, and I notice him scanning his eyes over to me briefly, but I look away and go to wait outside for them to finish their goodbyes. I don’t want to be in his company right now. I can’t seem to be able to think straight when he’s around me.

  A couple of minutes pass before I hear Alyssa giggling at something that Neil just said to her on their way out.

  “Here,” Ryan passes me a folded piece of paper, and I look at him questioningly as I go to take it from him. “James asked Brandon to pass it to you. He said it has something to do with rehearsal time,” he makes a face as he hands it over.

  James asked him to? James has my cell number and we only rehearsed last night. We start walking home and the curiosity gets the better of me, so I slow my pace while I unfold the piece of paper.

  Meet me by the lake at seven tomorrow night.

  Don’t judge me before you get to know me, please?

  “Well? What does it say?” Alyssa tries to read over my shoulder with curiosity in her eyes. “I know it’s not from James. Dammit, Alex! Brandon couldn’t keep his eyes off of you the entire time he was working behind the bar,” the corners of her lips rise briefly before she lets out a sigh. She leans over and reads the note for herself. “You should go and meet with him.”

  “Are you ladies coming or what?” Neil calls back to us, and when I look up, I see that they’re already half way up the street.

  “But …”

  “No buts, Alex,” she says sternly, and I know when she isn’t to be reckoned with. “I’ve never seen you get so uptight about anything, or anyone, like this before. I can see you like him, even if he might be—”

  “What? Totally wrong for me?” My voice holds a hint of sarcasm, but it’s not directed at her personally, and she knows this. It was aimed at myself.

  She shrugs as we pick up the pace and catch up with the guys.

  Don’t judge him. That might be easier said than done.

  5.

  I Felt It.

  “You were distracted again, Alex,” James’s voice is flat, and although he’s usually extremely placid, I think I’ve actually managed to piss him off this time. “Do you think we’ll be able to get through the audition if you don’t put your heart and soul into it?”

  I let out a deep sigh, and then lean forward and bang my head lightly on the desk a couple of times in pure frustration. Honestly? No. My head is somewhere else. It’s in the same place it has been for the last few days. How can one guy have such an impact on me after only six days? Six freaking days!

  I stand up and grab my bag, “I need to take a break. I’m going to sit outside for a little while,” I tell him as I make my way down the steps and towards the exit.

  “I’m gonna see if I can switch partners,” I hear James mutter angrily from behind me. I don’t blame him. He’s working exceptionally hard on this, and I’m not only ruining my chances, but his as well. “This isn’t working,” he walks by me without even so much as a goodbye.

  “James!” I call after him and see him immediately stop and turn around. “Just five minutes and then I promise I’ll be ready.”

  He shakes his head and relaxes his shoulders, “Come on,” he answers in an even tone, while holding the door open and waiting for me to catch up to him.

  I certainly don’t want to have to start rehearsing with a new partner, and it would be embarrassing if I would have to explain to Professor Hardy why James no longer wants to work with me.

  We sit on the grass outside the arts building in silence for a few minutes as James flicks through his notes, and although I know my lines, I’m just not feeling them whatsoever.

  “It’s the kiss. It just lacks …” He’s shaking his head as he places his file to the side, “Listen, I know it’s a little weird having to do this but can you try and think back to a time where you felt ... I don’t know … It needs to be—”

  “Passionate?” I simply answer and watch as he turns to face me, “Let’s go again.” I tell him with all seriousness.

  We jump onto our feet and start rehearsing the lines that lead up to the kissing scene. As we stand a couple of feet apart from each other, I close my eyes and think back to the way Brandon kissed me. Yeah, I know, it’s totally absurd. What makes it more ridiculous is the fact that I’m thinking about a Brandon that doesn’t even exist.

  I think back to the way he ran his fingers over my body, and the manner in which he kissed me, with what felt like pure desperation. I’m starting to feel warm and tingly in my lower body, and I’m getting breathless just thinking about how it felt when he slid his fingers inside … that’s enough.

  I practically lunge myself at James and grab at his hair, while pulling his face to mine as I smash my lips onto his. I hear him letting out a gasp, and notice that his whole body stills, as I slide my tongue into his mouth. After a few moments, his tongue joins with mine, and he cups my face tenderly while pulling me further into him. He slides his hands down to my waist and grips tightly on my hips.

  All I can think about is the way Brandon kissed me, how he held me in his arms, and how he did magical things with his hands. I think I’m in trouble.

  I let out a small moan and
only let go when I hear whistling from behind me.

  “Get a freaking room!” I step away when I hear a few people laughing at the comment that has been thrown our way, and when I look up, I see James’s eyes widening. He looks slightly taken aback.

  Holy hell! I just threw myself at him, “I’m sorry! Don’t be mad …”

  “That was perfect!” His face has turned from one of shock to joyful in a split second, and I find myself sighing in relief. I thought he was going to be mad at me or something. “Whoever you were thinking about just now, he’s a pretty lucky guy!” He shakes his head and lets out a small laugh, before standing forward and kissing me on the forehead.

  “So, are you happy to stay partners with me now?” I look up and see him grinning back at me. I feel so relieved.

  He winks as he puts his right arm around my waist, “After that performance? Hell yeah, I am! I think it may well cause quite a stir come Friday morning!” He chuckles lightly, and I know what he’s referring to. I can just imagine the daggers I’ll receive from some of the other girls when we perform on stage in front of them.

  “Shoot, I need to go,” I tell him once I see what the time is. “Do you want to get together and have one more practice before Friday?” I ask as I turn to face him again.

  “Sounds good to me!” He confirms excitedly, with his eyes shining brightly on me.

  “Great!” I return his smile with my own, before I step out of his hold and walk in the direction of my dorm.

  It’s been one hell of a long day, and I only have a couple of hours before I’m supposed to be meeting with Brandon. That’s if I decide to go at all. I’m still unsure about whether I should or not.

  I’m feeling torn and wonder whether Alyssa will be home yet, so she can help me to rationalize my thoughts.