The Real Me

by Herrick, Ann

  "Please. It's important."

  Walt stopped and leaned against a maple tree. "All right. What's so important?"

  I hesitated. What was I so nervous about? It was only Walt, after all. I took a deep breath. "Would you go to the prom with me?"

  Walt burst out laughing.

  I looked down at my feet, then up at Walt. He was doubled over. "Would you please stop laughing. A simple 'no' would suffice."

  "I'm sorry." Walt gasped. "I wasn't laughing at you."

  "It was a pretty good imitation," I said. Maybe I would have been better off staying in my shell, after all.

  "Mattie, I'd thought about asking you. But I never quite got up the nerve."

  "Nerve? But we've been friends forever."

  "That's just it. I was afraid it might ruin our friendship."

  "That's silly--"

  "And I thought you were interested in … someone else. I'm glad you're not--I wouldn't want to see you get hurt."

  "You don't have to worry about me," I said, trying not to sound guilty. "You still haven't answered my question, you know."

  "Oh. Right. Well, the answer is, drum roll, please …Yes!"

  Walt walked with his arm around me the rest of the way to school.

  At lunch I slid into my seat next to Erwina, waiting for the inevitable question.

  "Well?"

  "He said yes."

  "Ah, ha!" Erwina said triumphantly.

  "Ah, ha, what?"

  "I knew all along that you and Walt would go to the prom together. Remember, when you first started working together, and walking to school together?"

  "I have a date with Kevin for brunch the morning after."

  "Oh?" Erwina's eyebrows shot up to her hairline.

  I filled her in on all the glorious details of my afternoon at the beach with Kevin.

  "You mean to tell me Kevin wanted to ask you out, but he's so inexperienced with girls that he couldn't figure out a way to dump Nicole?"

  "Something like that." It had sounded so reasonable when Kevin explained it.

  "I don't know," Erwina said. "Sounds weird to me. It's hard to believe a guy as great-looking as Kevin could be so duh about stuff like that."

  "Only because you've never been shy a day in your life!" I said. "Looks and gender have nothing to do with being shy and uncertain and doubtful and--"

  "Okay, okay." Erwina held up her hands. "It's probably just a coincidence that he asked you out when summer and Craig are just around the corner. Anyone with two ears knows that the day after the prom is when Craig arrives in town."

  "Excuse me." I refused to listen to any more of Erwina's editorials. "I'm going to the lav." I left my tray and half eaten food on the table.

  I banged the lavatory door against the wall as I charged inside. Nicole Sandhurst stood in front of the sink combing her hair. She placed her comb on the edge of the sink and turned to face me. "Back off, Mason."

  "What?"

  "Stay away from Kevin. He's mine."

  "Oh," I said sweetly. "Do you have a receipt?" Maybe it was because I was angry, but for some reason, Nicole didn't scare me.

  "You know …." Nicole looked me over from head to toe. "You can lose weight and change your hair, but inside you're still just you."

  "That's right," I said, startled to find myself agreeing with Nicole. "I am still me. And I'm glad--because I like myself."

  Nicole rolled her eyes.

  "Sorry if you have a problem with that."

  Nicole frowned.

  I shrugged and turned on the water to wash my hands. I wasn't going to let Nicole run me out of the lavatory.

  Nicole grabbed her comb, stuffed it in her handbag, and darted out into the hall.

  "Good riddance," I whispered to the mirror.

  Suddenly Erwina's reflection appeared beside mine. She waved. "Hi."

  "Hi." I finished rinsing my hands and tore off a paper towel.

  "I'm sorry for the way I rambled on at lunch," Erwina said. "You know Kevin better than I do. Forgive me? Please?"

  "Oh, you're forgiven." I paused, then said, "I know you have only my best interests at heart. But don't worry. I think I know what I'm doing. And if I don't, well, nothing ventured, etc., etc."

  "Great. Hey, before you rushed off there was something I was going to tell you. Mr. Bailey is retiring to California next week to be near his son."

  "Mr. Bailey? So, who's going to run the Snack Shack this summer? He's done it ever since I can remember."

  "Who indeed?"

  "Well … who?"

  Erwina stared straight at me.

  "Me? Of course! Me! I'll go to the Town Hall right after school. I wonder who I talk to?"

  "My mother suggested you talk to Miss Tallerday."

  "Your mother? Of course. She always knows everything!" I hugged Erwina. "Thank her for me."

  "Sure."

  After school I stuck a note in Walt's locker, ran to the Town Hall, and filled out an application for the job as manager of the Snack Shack. When I got home, Parmesan was pacing back and forth in front of the house. "Oh, poor thing." I rubbed Parmesan's chin. "You must be starving."

  Parmesan rubbed against my legs all the way to the kitchen. I put some dry cat food in Parmesan's dish and gave her a bowl of fresh water.

  My phone rang.

  "Hi, Mattie. It's Walt. I missed you on the way home this afternoon."

  "Didn't you get my note?"

  "Yes. But I still missed you."

  "Oh. Well, I'll see you in the morning."

  "That seems so far away."

  "It does?" I checked the kitchen clock. "It's only fifteen hours from now."

  "That seems like a long time to me."

  "Um, Walt, I've got to start dinner soon. Did you want something?"

  "Besides hearing your voice, I wanted to ask you something."

  "Well?"

  "I've got to rent a tux for the prom soon. Is there any particular color you'd like me to get?"

  "I hadn't really thought about it."

  "I don't want to clash with your dress."

  "I don't have a dress yet."

  "Well, then, I'll stick to basic black--ha, ha. That should go with anything."

  "Whatever you want."

  "Fine. See you in the morning."

  "Bye." I hung up. A dress! I hadn't even thought about a dress. There wouldn't be time for another trip into New Haven. Maybe I could find something in Madison. There was that little dress shop next to the movie theater.

  My mother picked me up after school the next day and took me to Madison. There were still several dresses in my size, which was ten or twelve depending on the dress. I thought about how Nicole would look in her sexy, slinky red dress. But, remembering how I felt wearing the low cut blouse to Erwina's party, I decided not to get anything too daring. Besides, Mom wouldn't go for it anyway.

  After trying on several dresses and not finding anything I really liked, I started to get discouraged. Then there was a tap on my dressing room door.

  "Miss Mason?" It was the sales clerk. "I have a dress you might want to try. It was in the back room being repaired. It just was missing a hook, but that's been replaced and it really is a lovely dress."

  I could just imagine what it looked like. But I didn't want to hurt the woman's feelings. I opened the door a crack and stuck out my arm. "Thanks. I'll try it on."

  It was a pale lavender taffeta dress with silky trim at the top and at the hem. I slipped it on. The lavender emphasized my green eyes. The fitted bodice actually made my waist look smaller. The effect was romantic and understated at the same time. Not so long ago I'd thought of myself as too big. Now I felt elegant. It was a nice feeling.

  "How is it?" The sales clerk called through the door.

  "Perfect," I said. "I'll take it." I wondered how I'd look dancing with Kevin.

  On Friday I got a call from Miss Tallerday. My reference letters had all been glowing--would I stop by in a few days to pick up the record bo
oks and order forms I would need, and could I start work at the Snack Shack the first weekend after school got out?

  I calmly said yes, then danced around the room after I hung up. I announced to Parmesan, "I have the job!"

  Saturday afternoon Walt and I worked on the finishing touches for the prom decorations. We went over our checklist for what we hoped would be the last time. The prom was only a week away.

  The cookies were all baked and frozen, and the ingredients for the punch were in our refrigerator. The decorations were nearly done. We had only to finish gluing the shells on the crowns for the king and queen of the prom.

  "I'm done." Walt held up the queen's crown.

  "Since you're finished with that, why don't you take a break and come back this evening to help pack up the decorations. That way we'll be able to set up faster next week."

  "Fine," said Walt. "I'll be over right after dinner."

  After Walt left, I continued working on what I knew would be Kevin's crown. Even though he would wear it for only a few minutes, I wanted it to be special. I used only shells that were in perfect condition, arranging them with great care. When I was almost done I took the piece of blue glass I'd found at the beach, touched a drop of glue to it, and tucked it in among the shells. I filled in a few spaces with the tiniest shells I could find, and then I was done.

  I picked up the crown Walt had been working on and tried it on. If only I'd be the one to wear it at the prom. But everyone always voted for two juniors who attended the prom together. I knew that couple would be Nicole and Kevin. There was no way it would be Kevin and me, even though that was how I had decided to vote. The ballots for king and queen were separate and secret, so no one would know.

  After dinner my folks went to the movies.

  "Anything to get out of packing," Dad teased.

  Walt came over and he and I packed what decorations we could into boxes. The chariot and seahorses would have to go as they were in the back of the Turner's pickup truck.

  "I can't believe it," I said finally. "We're done."

  "At last," Walt rubbed his hands together.

  "How about some lemonade to celebrate?"

  "Sounds good." Walt wiped his brow. Though it was almost dark, it was still warm.

  I went in the house. As I put ice into tall glasses and poured the lemonade, I heard someone pull into the driveway. When I went out back with the lemonade, I saw George, Carl, and Phil talking with Walt. Walt looked upset.

  "Hi, guys," I said. "How about some lemonade?"

  "Lemonade?" George snickered. "We don't need any lemonade."

  I put down the tray and pulled Walt aside.

  "What's going on?" I whispered.

  "They've been drinking," Walt said. "They want to go pick up the rest of the decorations."

  "The rest?"

  "Those seahorses don't look right." George staggered over to me. "We're going to get the pair over at the Surfside Inn."

  "Don't be crazy," I said. "You can't do that."

  "Sure we can." George spun around and weaved his way to the pickup.

  "Walt, we've got to stop them."

  "I don't think they'll get very far."

  "They shouldn't go anywhere at all," I said. "Not in their condition. We can't let them leave."

  "I don't think the two of us can stop the three of them."

  "Oh, for--" I ran to the driver's side of the truck and yanked the door open. "George!" I flashed him a big smile. "Why don't you stay here and … and help us?"

  George grabbed me and pulled me half way into the truck. "Why don't you come with us? You can sit on my lap." He puckered his lips at me and almost knocked me out of the truck with his breath.

  I yanked myself free. "Walt! Do something!"

  Walt walked calmly to the truck. "Move over, George. I'm driving."

  George giggled insanely. "You can ride in back."

  "I'm the chairman of this decoration committee. I know a shortcut. I'll drive," Walt commanded. "Now move over!"

  George squished over, spilling onto Carl's lap, as Walt forced himself into the driver's seat.

  I watched helplessly as the truck disappeared down the road. I should have done something. I prayed that Walt would be careful.

  I tried to watch television, but I couldn't concentrate. If only Walt would call and let me know what happened!

  There was a crash of thunder. Then lightning and pouring rain. I checked the clock. It was a few minutes after ten. A car pulled into the driveway. But it was only my parents. They ran in through the back door, shaking off the rain.

  "Whew! It's awful out there," Mom said.

  "At least the umbrella is warm and dry in the hall closet," Dad replied.

  I wanted to ask if they'd seen any accidents involving a pickup truck on the way home. Instead, I asked, "H how was the movie?"

  "It was funny," Dad said. "Did you and Walt finish packing the decorations?"

  I nodded. "He, um, left over an hour ago."

  "Good work," Dad said. "Grace, let's call it a night."

  "I'm ready." Mom yawned. "Goodnight, Mattie."

  "I think I'll go to bed, too," I said. In my room I peered out the front window. It was raining so hard that the street looked like a blurry photograph.

  Where was Walt? Why didn't he call? Text? Send smoke signals? Something! Had there been an accident? Were they all at the hospital? The police station?

  I crawled into bed and lay awake for a long time. Eventually I drifted into an uneasy sleep.

  Chapter Thirteen

  I woke up, a streak of sunlight across my face. It was six forty five. I turned on the radio and listened to the news. No reports of accidents or unusual robberies.

  I wanted to talk to Walt. I grabbed my phone, started to call, then stopped. I wondered if I should call the local hospitals first. Or the county jail.

  I picked up Parmesan from the foot of my bed and cuddled him. "Oh, Parmesan, if anything has happened to Walt, it's all my fault!"

  The phone rang. I almost dropped both it and Parmesan.

  "H hello?"

  "Hi. It's me."

  "Walt! What happened? How are you? Where are you?"

  "I'm at the clinic."

  "The clinic? Oh, no!"

  "Relax. I have good news and bad news."

  "What's the good news?"

  "We didn't go to the Surfside Inn."

  "And the bad news?"

  "We never got there because of a little accident."

  "Accident? A wreck? On, no! George? Carl? Phil? Are they all right? What about you?"

  "Hold it. They're all fine. It wasn't a car accident. I kept driving around saying I knew a shortcut to, you know, stall for time. Then, a stroke of luck. We got a flat tire."

  "Luck?"

  "Right. We couldn't go anywhere with a flat tire."

  "Ah."

  "Well, we started to fix it. But George dropped the jack on my feet. He couldn't stop apologizing. I finally convinced him the best thing he could do was call my parents. They came. My mother took me to the clinic, while my father helped change the tire and get the other guys home. I'm all right, except for two broken bones."

  "Oh, no! I'm so sorry. It's all my fault."

  "No, it's not. And I'm the one who should be sorry, because this means I can't take you to the prom. It was one bone in each foot. Both feet are in casts!"

  "Yikes! Walt, I feel just terrible."

  "Me, too. I was really looking forward to the prom."

  "Not the prom. That doesn't matter. I feel so guilty about what happened to you. I made you go after George."

  "I would have done something anyway. I just waited until the last minute because I kept hoping George would sober up, or at least come to his senses."

  I sat up. "When are visiting hours?"

  "I'm already home. I'm not sick. I just won't be walking around for a while."

  "Walt, I feel totally awful about this."

  "Relax, will you? This means I get t
o take my finals in the comfort of my own bed."

  "I'll bring your homework to you every day!"

  "Don't worry. Arrangements for that have already been made."

  "I'll visit you this afternoon."

  "That'd be great."

  "See you then."

  "Fine."

  I relayed the news about Walt to my parents and then to Erwina. She offered to round up a cousin as a last minute date for the prom, but I refused. I decided I deserved to go to the prom alone. I'd foolishly spent weeks hoping Kevin would ask me. When he didn't, I'd asked Walt at the last minute, as if he was an old standby just waiting for me.

  Well, I'd make it up to him. After lunch I cut some flowers from the yard, then went to Sweet Stuff and bought a one pound box of chocolate covered cherries--Walt's favorite.

  I was relieved when Walt's mother seemed glad to see me. I tiptoed down the hall and knocked timidly on Walt's bedroom door.

  "Come on in!" he called.

  I opened the door and saw Walt in bed with his cast covered feet propped up on pillows. Sitting on the edge of the bed was Laura Arsenault, next to a two pound box of chocolate-covered cherries.

  Walt held out the box to me. "Want one? Laura brought them?"

  "Uh, no thanks." Without ceremony I handed my box of candy to Walt. He accepted it with a smile. I turned to Laura. "Hi."

  "Hi, Mattie." Laura glanced briefly at me, then turned back to Walt. "Are you comfortable? Can I fluff your pillows?"

  "You've done more than enough already, Laura." Walt gazed intently into her eyes.

  "I, uh, brought these, too." I handed my bouquet to Walt.

  "Thank you," said Walt. "Just put them on my dresser. My Mom will get a vase for them later."

  As I placed my flowers on Walt's dresser I saw a huge formal arrangement of yellow roses. "Oh! These roses are beautiful!"

  "Laura gave them to me." Walt smiled and Laura blushed.

  "Oh. Well." I was rapidly starting to feel out of place. "Um, I guess I'd better be going now."

  Walt and Laura looked at me, said goodbye in unison, then gazed into each other's eyes.

  "Bye," I said, not sure that anyone had heard me.

  On my way home I tried to work up some jealousy over Laura and Walt. But the fact was that I just wasn't jealous. Probably Walt's first instinct was right--going to prom together might have ruined our friendship. Especially in light of my feelings for Kevin. And Walt's apparently growing interest in Laura.