Soaring Free

by Becca Van

  Nic took the empty water bottle from her and placed it on the bedside table.

  “I waited for two hours. When the knock came at the door I thought it was my mother and she’d forgotten her keys. I was smiling and was about to tease her, but when I opened the door and saw the policemen on the doorstep…I knew something dreadful had happened.

  “They informed me that my mom had been involved in a hit-and-run accident and even though they were looking for the driver, they hadn’t been able to find him yet.” Joni paused to wipe a hand over her face.

  “I had to go down to the morgue and identify her body for their records.

  “It took them six weeks for the police to find all the evidence and by then my father, who had managed to escape the mental hospital he’d been institutionalized in, was back where he should never have been able to break out from.”

  “God, sweetheart, I’m so sorry.” Gabe leaned over, snagged her around the waist, and pulled her into his lap. “I know how much that hurt you. To have your father kill your mom like that, but do you really think your mother would want you to hold yourself back and not live? Don’t you think she’d want you to be happy, to find love and live a full life?”

  “I don’t know if I can. What if I allow myself to love and it’s not returned? I don’t think I could deal with that sort of heartache again.”

  “Love is scary,” Gabe began. “I got engaged right after finishing high school. I was young and full of life with the whole world in front of me. I had been dating Sonja since middle school. We were going to get married and start a family early.

  “I’d just met Nic and Tom when I started working at a security company. Sonja was commuting to college, studying to become a nurse. We were going to be married in three months’ time.”

  Joni reached out and took Gabe’s hand in hers.

  “She’d just come out of college and was walking toward the parking lot to her car. She never made it. Some fucked up ex-student decided he was going to take out as many students as he could before turning the gun on himself.”

  “Oh, Gabe. I’m so sorry.”

  “You have nothing to be sorry for, sweetheart, and, although I grieved and felt guilty for a longtime after Sonja died, it wasn’t because I felt like any of what happened to her was my fault. Do you know why I felt guilty?”

  “Because you were alive and she wasn’t.”

  “Yes. It took me a long time to get my head out of my ass and realize that she would have been angry with me. I was a mess. I was existing and not living at all. If it hadn’t been for Tom and Nic, I don’t know if I would be here right now. But I’m so glad I am because I would have missed out on meeting you.

  “You are a very special person, Joni Meeks. You are beautiful inside and out and I love you very, very, much.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Joni felt like she’d been pulled through a wringer backward. At first she’d been horrified and then embarrassed by her breakdown, but once her tears had slowed, the pain and grief she’d been carrying around for so long lifted and she felt lighter than she’d ever felt in her whole life.

  Her heart had ached for Gabe when he told her about his fiancée but she was at a loss for words with his declaration of love. She’d never expected to hear those words from any man.

  “I…”

  “My turn.” Tom clasped her hips and lifted her to his lap. “I know it doesn’t help to hear these words and you’ll always have a huge hole in your heart from losing your mother and, even if you don’t admit it, your father, too. But be thankful you had time with both of them even if it wasn’t a lifetime.

  “I have no idea who my parents are, love. I was found in a box dumped on the steps of a church, and spent my whole life in the foster system. You’ve known what love felt like and, although I have these two idiots, it’s not the same as having parents or a partner. Yes, I love Nic and Gabe like brothers but that pales in comparison to the real thing.

  “I’ve been with a lot of women and even had a relationship or two, if you could call them that, but those relationships were based on lust and not love. They were doomed from the start. I never knew what it was to truly love someone until I met you. I love you, Joni Meeks.” Tom leaned down and lingeringly kissed Joni on the lips.

  Joni’s heart began to fill with joy until it felt like it was overflowing. She opened her mouth to tell them all that she loved them, too, but Nic reached over and placed a finger on her lips to halt her, and then he cupped her face between his hands.

  “My sister died when she was ten. My mom had gone over next door to help an elderly neighbor and since our dad walked out when I was a baby, there was no one to watch over us.

  “Vanessa was two years older than I was and was supposed to keep an eye on me but I didn’t want a girl watching me, because at that age girls had germs. I went to my room to play.

  “If I’d been with her, maybe Vanessa would still be alive, but I’m not sure. A car came around the corner too fast and lost control. It ended up in our living room where Vanessa had been playing with her dolls. She was killed instantly.”

  “Oh, god,” Joni sobbed and grabbed hold of Nic’s wrists. “You probably would have ended up dead, too.”

  “Maybe. I grieved and blamed myself for not being there with her. It took me a while to figure out that we had no idea what fate would bring us and we can’t control every aspect of life. If I had been in the living room and died with her, my mother would have been alone and I know she wouldn’t have been able to have born the guilt of losing both her children at the same time. She was a shell of herself after Vanessa was killed and, although she went through life as best she could, she was never the same. She died a couple of years ago when she got pneumonia and, even though she never said it, right before she died I saw relief in her eyes. Relief from the guilt and pain of being with a neighbor and not with her kids when her daughter was killed.

  “I loved her as much as I could and hoped she’d let the survivor’s guilt go. If she’d done that she might very well have found love again and lived a long full life. But it wasn’t to be.

  “I vowed then when I found love that I was going to reach out and grab and hold on tight with both hands. There are no guarantees in anything, but to live life in fear of losing isn’t living at all.

  “I love you, Joni Meeks. You are everything to me.”

  Although she was already in love with them, she felt herself fall in that moment, all the more for them. Her heart was so full of happiness and love she was almost bursting with it and couldn’t contain the emotions anymore.

  “At first I thought you only wanted me for the sex.” She held up a hand when all three opened their mouths as if to refute her statement. “Please, let me finish. It’s my turn.”

  Nic was holding one of her hands as was Gabe. She was still sitting on Tom’s lap and she loved how protected and cherished she felt with them surrounding her with their bodies and heat.

  “Go ahead, baby.” Nic squeezed her hand with encouragement.

  “I knew as soon as we made love for the first time I was in trouble.” She paused to lick her lips. “No, actually that’s a lie. I knew before I even turned to look at you when we were at the club the first time that you were a threat. Everywhere you touched me with your eyes tingled. But I wasn’t ready for you then and the only thing I could do was run.”

  “We knew you were attracted to us, sweetheart.” Gabe lifted her hand to his lips and kissed the back of it.

  “Yeah, well, I didn’t like the way you made me feel. I’d vowed after Angus to never get involved with another man again. Having the three of you pursuing me was terrifying, but I needed to work and thought I could keep the attraction locked down tight.”

  “We were determined, love.” Tom hugged her tighter for a moment.

  “Yes, you were. Dogged is more like.” She smiled. “Little by little you worked your way into my heart and I just couldn’t seem to walk away. I wanted to. I tried, but you m
ade me feel so special.

  “I want to thank you all for not giving up on me. I’d lived with that pain for so long, I wasn’t sure I would ever feel…normal again. But you three are like my knights in shining armor and were relentless in breaking down those walls I had.” Joni drew a deep breath and cupped Tom’s face between her hands.

  “I love you, Thomas Quentin. Thank you for helping to set me free.” Joni leaned forward and kissed him. It wasn’t a carnally passionate kiss, but she made sure to portray every ounce of love she felt for him into it. When she released his lips, she was surprised and humbled to see he had tears in his eyes. He opened his mouth but snapped it shut as if not knowing what to say, or too overcome with emotion to speak, and then he smiled and nodded at her.

  Joni crawled from Tom’s lap over and onto Gabe’s. She sighed with joy when his arms wrapped around her body and she was safe with the knowledge that these men would never, ever hurt her. She gripped his shoulders and stared deeply into his beautiful eyes.

  “I love you, Gabe Solar. Thank you for your love and care and for helping me to live again.”

  “You’re very welcome, sweetheart. I would do anything for you.” Gabe was the one to lean down and kiss her. This kiss was more passionate than the one she’d shared with Tom, but was also full of love and emotion. When they pulled back she was the one with tears in her eyes and rolling down her cheeks.

  She wiped her face with the back of her hands and just as she was about to crawl over to Nic, he grasped her hips and lifted her over to him.

  “Thank you for helping me to fly free, Nicholas Flange. Without you all I would still be hiding from the world. I love you so much, Nic.”

  “You’re my heart, Joni. There’s nothing I won’t do for you.”

  “Good. I want to go home.”

  “Your wish is our command, sweetheart. That is unless we’re in the bedroom or doing a scene with you.” Gabe grinned and waggled his eyebrows and they all burst out laughing.

  She dressed quickly, a little disappointed that they hadn’t gotten to make love to her, but they had the rest of the night to do so and she wanted to be in their home, in their bed when they did. Although she loved the club and was eager to come back for some more carnal delight, she didn’t want anyone seeing them while they made love after they’d all declared their love for each other.

  She wanted to savor their touches, kisses, and loving in the privacy of their home, because to her this was a very special moment.

  Nic pulled her into his side when she was dressed and they exited the room back into the noisy, yet highly erotic, atmosphere from the club.

  “Do you want to come back?” Gabe asked as he drew up to her other side.

  “Oh, hell yes.”

  “That’s great, love,” Tom said from behind her. “We still have so much to show you.”

  “I’m looking forward to it. Just not tonight.”

  “We understand, baby.” Nic leaned down and kissed the top of her head as he guided her to the double ornate timber doors. “We are going to spend the rest of the night making love to you and we’re all going to love you together.”

  Joni’s heart thumped with excitement. “Promise?” she asked in a breathy voice.

  “Fuck yes, sweetheart.”

  Joni giggled as they walked outside and rushed toward the truck. She was so full of excitement and anticipation she didn’t notice the man leaning against the vehicle until it was too late.

  The excitement waned and in its place fear erupted, until her legs were trembling and she felt as weak as a baby.

  Paul, a neighbor she’d barely exchanged a “hi” with, stood in front of them with two guns, one in each hand and they were pointed at her and her men.

  “Paul? What are you doing?”

  “You know this man, Joni?” Gabe asked in an angry voice.

  “H–he’s a n–neighbor.”

  “Why didn’t you come to me?” Paul yelled his question, spittle flying from his lips.

  “What? What are you talking about?”

  “You were supposed to come to me when your place was trashed. You were supposed to seek me out when you got scared.”

  “Uh…I’m sorry…”

  “Shut the fuck up. You’re a slut just like the rest of them. I’ve been watching you for months. You were supposed to be mine. I knew I had to do something when I saw the way you looked at them.”

  Joni shivered. She was so scared but she was more worried that one of her men was going to get shot. Maybe if she kept him talking it would buy them some time. Hopefully whoever was watching the security monitors could see that they were in trouble.

  “How could I be yours? We hardly acknowledged each other?”

  “Joni,” Tom grabbed her hips and pulled her back a couple of steps.

  “Don’t move,” Paul roared and pointed one of the guns at her head.

  Her body shook so bad and her mind raced as she tried to think what to do. No matter what scenario crossed her mind, she discarded it. Even if she was able to distract him, she knew she would end up getting shot, but so could one of her guys. That thought was unacceptable to her. She loved them more than her own life and would do anything to make sure they stayed safe.

  “What do you want from me?” Joni was surprised at how calm her voice sounded, when she was quaking with fear.

  “You. I want you, Joni. You were supposed to love me.” Paul’s shoulders slumped and the guns waivered.

  She pulled from Tom’s grip and held up her hands when Nic and Gabe grabbed for her arms and rushed forward a few steps.

  “Joni, what the fuck are you doing?” Nic asked in a low, angry voice.

  She gave a slight shake of her head and placed one hand behind her back, shaping her finger and thumb hoping they understood she wanted them to call 9-1-1 on their cell phones.

  As she moved closer, she saw a couple of shadows moving in toward Paul from behind him and nearly sighed with relief. She wasn’t out of the woods yet, but if she kept him looking at her, whoever was creeping up on them might be able to get the jump on him.

  “Did I ever give you the impression I was interested in you?” Joni cringed at her question and the anger she heard in her own voice. She didn’t want to incite him, but she just couldn’t seem to help herself.

  She’d just found the love of her dreams and she wasn’t letting him take that away from her.

  “You saw me watching you,” Paul snarled. “I know you did.”

  “And when I did see you I said hello. Did it ever occur to you that if you were interested in dating me, to ask me out?”

  “You wouldn’t have given me the time of day. I watched you. You never even noticed when other men looked at you. Not until you started working for those assholes.”

  “So what do you want me to do? I’m not going to lie to you. You can’t make someone love you, Paul. It doesn’t work that way.”

  Without any warning Paul lunged for her. He used her body as a shield, holding one of the guns against her temple as he dragged her sideways. That was when she heard sirens in the distance and knew the police were on their way.

  “Turn around and say good-bye, Joni. You’re coming with me.”

  “Let me go. Please? You won’t get away with this. The police are already on their way.”

  Joni reached up to push the gun from her head but froze when she heard him cock it. She looked over to Nic, Gabe, and Tom, meeting each of their gazes through her tear-filled blurry eyes.

  I love you all, Joni mouthed as tears streamed down her face. She prayed that the men who had been creeping up on Paul made their move soon, but she wasn’t sure they would get to her in time, because he was keeping his back to the vehicles as he dragged her with him.

  And then everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. Someone jumped down on top of her and Paul and a loud bang sounded in her ears, making them ring. White-hot agonizing pain seared her upper arm and then it went blessedly numb. Another gunshot rang out and
then another. She fell to the ground and Paul fell on top of her, his dead weight making it hard to breathe.

  Spots formed in front of her eyes, but when she inhaled she couldn’t draw any air into her lungs and she gave in to the darkness.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Tom had never been so scared in his life when he saw the guy pointing the guns toward them. He wasn’t scared for himself but was terrified Joni would be taken from them before they could really start their life together.

  His first instinct was to pull his own gun, but he wasn’t on duty and hadn’t brought it with him.

  When the guy started ranting at Joni that she was supposed to be with him, Tom nearly lost it. But that was nothing compared to the fear and anger racing through him when she pulled away from them and walked toward the fucker with the guns.

  Since the perp couldn’t look at all of them at the same time, he slowly and carefully pulled his cell phone from his pocket and dialed the surveillance room. Hopefully, whoever was in there was watching the horrifying scene unfold and had already called the cops.

  He nearly sagged with relief when he saw one of his colleagues trying to sneak up behind the fucker that was now using Joni as a shield. When he glanced to the side he saw another man moving in and his heart nearly stopped beating altogether. He had no idea who he was and he didn’t have a gun, but he was worried he was there to help Joni’s neighbor steal her out from underneath their noses.

  But when the older guy climbed up onto the roof of a truck and placed his fingers over his lips, his knees almost gave out. He wasn’t here to help hurt their woman, he was trying to help save her.

  And then everything seemed to happen at once. The guy on the roof of the truck leapt off and as he landed on Paul’s back, he reached for the gun.

  Three shots were fired almost simultaneously and he stumbled as he raced toward Joni as she went falling to the ground. The Paul guy had fallen on top of his woman and as he hauled him off of her, he looked over to see that the older man was also on the ground with a gunshot wound to the chest.