Under The Peaches (Teaching Love Series Book 1)

by Shana Vanterpool

  The bad part is I don’t think I ever will. “Not for lack of trying.”

  “I’ll never forget you,” he says stubbornly, but I know he’s lying. Boys like Brady only remember what they want to remember. And who would want to remember a girl like me when he had to play himself? “How’s Julian handling it?”

  So much of me is over him. Talking to him and not clawing his eyes out is particularly difficult this morning. “Julian’s wonderful. Thanks for asking.”

  “Nessa’s coming back to school today. I decided I’d rather not be there.” He stretches his feet out on the coffee table and gets comfortable. “Does Julian know you’re thinking about not going back?”

  He’s too cozy. It’s getting on my nerves. “Yes …” Mr. Hunt told us not to say anything. I’m not sure Brady counts, but I don’t want to risk it.

  He raises his eyebrows. “He’s cool with it?”

  “He’s not uncool with it.”

  “So you’re never coming back to school?” He sounds pissed.

  “What’s it to you?”

  Setting his feet down, he turns so he can fully glare. “We’re friends. It matters to me. If it’s because of Nessa, I don’t think she’ll mess with you again. I can’t believe Julian’s cool with it.”

  “First of all, Brady, we’re not friends. We stopped being friends the moment you used me too many times to count. My reasons do not revolve around you or Nessa. I know that’s hard to believe considering you’re both egomaniacs. And lastly, what Julian does or doesn’t do isn’t up to you.” I blow out my breath and sit back, my point clear.

  “Oh, come on, Kaelyn. Don’t be like that. I thought we were making progress.”

  He’s a selfish clueless moron. What did I ever see in him? “What progress? We barely talk. The trial’s over. I appreciate you taking my side, I really do, but it’s done. There’s no reason for us to talk ever again.”

  His eyes are confused. All this time he thought he was making up for what he did. He hasn’t changed at all. He’s still only thinking about himself. He didn’t speak up at the trial for me. He did it for himself.

  “What are you saying? We’re going to stop talking forever?”

  I look him right in the eye. “That’s the plan.”

  “It’s not my plan. I thought we could at least keep in touch. This isn’t fair.”

  “Fair?” I gawk at him. “Was it fair how you treated me?”

  He rolls his eyes. “Of course, I know it wasn’t fair. But I apologized.”

  I suddenly feel sorry for him. He’ll never change. He’ll never fully understand what he did to me because to do so, he’d have to have had a conscience to begin with. People like Brady don’t do things for others unless it benefits them. I can move on. I can become someone better, someone loved, and someone worth something. But Brady will always be Brady. That is far worse a punishment than anything I could have ever envisioned.

  “I’m not doing this with you anymore. We’re done. You live your life, Brady McAlister. I’m sick of letting you ruin mine.” I get up and walk over to the front door, opening it. “You can go now. I hope no one else falls for your bullshit the way I did. Because you are never going to be worth it.”

  Brady can only stare.

  “I don’t think she can be any clearer.” Julian leans against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. “You can go now.”

  I think Brady can tell there’s nothing left to say. He nods to himself, as if accepting this, and then gets up slowly. Before he passes by me he meets my eyes. The girl who wanted him so much can’t remember why she did. There’s nothing left to him she can imagine wanting, let alone giving so much away for. His jade green eyes, his perfect blond hair, and boyish face leave nothing but a bad taste behind. To think I obsessed over him, wasted even a second. I may have been stupid once. But if Brady taught me anything, it was that I would never be stupid again.

  “I’m sorry,” he whispers, pausing on the porch.

  “So am I.” I close the door in his face.

  The moment he’s gone, I sense a weight lift off my shoulders. The regret over sophomore year becomes acceptance. I forgive myself for making a mistake, for the last two years, for losing a part of myself under the peaches. I take a deep breath and turn around to find Julian smiling proudly at me. There’s still so much of me left.

  I give Julian a small smile. “Let’s get out of here.”

  It doesn’t take us long to pack up. Julian rents a small moving trailer and together we pack it as fast as we can. It takes a couple days, but we manage to pack it full. All I care about is making sure the man I love makes it into the front seat.

  When the last of our things are in the trailer, we stand on the curb and stare up at his house. There’s a chill in the air. Thick swaths of clouds paint the sky. Instead of wanting my parka, I lean against Julian.

  He brings his arms around me. “You all ready to go?”

  “I’m ready. Are you?”

  “I’ve been ready.” He takes a deep breath and then kisses the top of my head. “Why don’t you get in the car? I’ll go lock up.”

  “Yes, boss.”

  “Kael,” he warns. His hands start attacking my sides, tickling me.

  I wiggle out of his grasp, fighting the urge to smile. “Anything else you want me to do, boss?”

  “Me, but I don’t think we have time for that.” He grins salaciously, a lion in the middle of the street.

  “This morning wasn’t enough?” I raise my eyebrows and then bite my bottom lip, goading him as I move away. “It wasn’t enough in the kitchen after that? You really did make good use of that counter.”

  “I don’t think I can ever get enough of you.” He stalks me. “In fact,” he continues, closer still. “I’d like to make good use of the front lawn, the sidewalk, and the middle of the street.” His hands settle on my hips.

  I brace myself against his forearms and hope he’s kidding, because I don’t think I’d know how to tell him no. Not when he’s looking at me like this. “What about grass stains? I hear they’re a pain to get out.”

  He smirks, sliding his hands around to grab my ass. He squeezes me tightly in his palms. “Grass stains would be the least of your worries if I got you on the lawn. Get in the car.” His hand cracks off my ass hard and swift. “Hurry up.”

  When he returns a few minutes later, he has a backpack thrown over his shoulder. I watch him lock the front door, look over his shoulder, and then hide the key in the garden out front for later when Jaz’s employee comes to tie up the loose ends. He looks up at the house once more. I wonder what he’s thinking. Whatever it is, I hope he’s just as glad to leave this place behind as I am.

  “We have two options,” he announces when he gets in the front seat. “We can either drive in shifts and get there in two days, or I can drive and we can get there in three to four days.” He buckles his seatbelt and looks at me for my answer.

  Why is it up to me? “I don’t mind driving.”

  He nods slowly. His expression changes ever so slightly. It’s just a minor difference in his face. It could mean nothing. But if I didn’t know any better I’d say he was disappointed by my answer as he starts his car.

  I reach over and touch his face, waiting for him to meet my gaze. “What is it?”

  He sighs. “I thought the whole reason for selling your car was so we could drive together. I want a few more days with you before my family gets to you. I’ll drive. And you’ll ask me those questions you’re burning to ask me.” I think he can tell I’m still confused because he kisses my palm and smiles a little. “When we get to California we’re going to be too busy. I’ll need to find a new teaching job. We’ll need to find a place to live we can afford. It’s ten times more expensive there. And then there’s high school for you. It’ll take a while before we can just be together. I want you to myself for a little while longer.”

  I wonder if this feeling will ever go away, this overwhelmingly nervous heartwarmin
g feeling I have whenever Julian tells me what he’s thinking. I want to hold on for dear life despite my fears.

  I guide his face close and press a kiss to his lips. “Fine. I’ll be selfish. I won’t drive. And you’ll drive slowly. Maybe we can make it a five-day trip.” I kiss him again, showing him how I also feel. “Maybe we can see about those grass stains.”

  “On your back,” he whispers against my lips.

  I slide my tongue over his bottom lip. “In my hair.”

  “All over your body. I want to be all over your body.” He undoes his seatbelt and follows my lips. “I can’t get enough of you, Kael.”

  Never mind wondering. I know these feelings will never go away. I don’t want them to. I dig my nails into his lower back and pull him closer. “Your mom’s going to be disappointed.”

  He shakes his head, kisses me deeply for a few seconds, and then pulls back, opening his gorgeous gray eyes slowly. “Thank you for meeting her so soon. My family is important to me and it means a lot that you’re so open.”

  “Why wouldn’t I be open about it? Anyone that had a hand in making you is all right with me. But,” I begin, and then look down at the stubble on his jaw.

  He kisses me gently. “What? Remember. You can tell me anything.”

  “I’m only eighteen. What if they find out how we met? What if they ask?” I don’t want them to think I ruined his career, or worse, him.

  Julian slowly traces my lips, seeming hypnotized. I know how he feels. “Would it make you more comfortable if you had real answers to give them?”

  I kiss his fingers as they move teasingly around my mouth. I want to rip his clothes off. As it is, I must get my point across. This is his family. They deserve answers at least. And if I can’t give them the truth, I want to give them something close. “It would.”

  His eyes won’t leave my mouth for anything. “Your name is Kaelyn Jefferies. You’re eighteen. Your age isn’t an issue for me. It won’t be an issue for them. We met at Bella’s, which isn’t a lie. I’ve met you there. Where we really met only matters to us. Is that enough?”

  I shake my head yes. “Look at me.”

  His eyes flash to mine.

  “Do you promise they’ll like me?”

  “I promise they’re going to love you forever. Just like I will. I should go sit down or you’re going to end up getting acquainted with the backseat.” He doesn’t move.

  “You should.” I lick my lips. “Or I’m going to let you acquaint me with the backseat.”

  He hangs his head and groans. “You drive me crazy.” Sitting back, he buckles his seatbelt and then readjusts his jeans.

  We don’t look back at the house when he pulls away. I will only remember the inside of it. The nights spent tangled in our sheets, the shouts when we fought, and the apologies whispered. I’ll only remember Julian when I look back on Savannah. The rest doesn’t deserve to be a part of my future. They didn’t stand beside me during my toughest times. They kicked me when I was down. Julian stood there, he picked me up when I needed him to and he held me when I couldn’t stand up on my own. He was there during my darkest time. What is it going to be like in the light with him and I standing side by side?

  I peek at him as he gets onto the highway. “I love you, Julian.”

  He frowns at me. “I love you, too.” He sounds confused. “What were you thinking about? What’s wrong?”

  I have to look away. If I cry he’ll think something’s wrong. Nothing’s wrong. “How you stood right by my side no matter what. I love you for it. I love you for everything you do, but I especially love you for taking care of me when everyone else tried their best to do the opposite. Thank you.”

  He takes a second to answer. He clears his throat before he does. “Anything for you, Kael.”

  We’re quiet for a while. The only sounds are his tires on the road and the other cars passing us on the highway. The sky clears when we get to Mississippi. There’s hardly any clouds and the sun is bright and golden. The silence starts to make me stir-crazy. I’ve driven almost this long before when Haddie dropped me off with Bruce, but that was a different time. I knew before I even met him that Bruce was probably not going to be the happy ending I secretly hoped for. Until Julian, I’d given up hope.

  “What if you didn’t come out to my spot that day?”

  “You mean the one by the music hall?”

  “Yes. What made you go there? I mean I know it was because of Layla, but I’ve been going there every day since freshman year. Not once did I see you there. Had you been there before?”

  “Layla called me. We had a fight. I usually just ate lunch in my classroom, but I needed to clear my head, so I went for a walk. I sort of ended up there. I’m glad I did.” He smiles at the road. “It doesn’t matter if I didn’t, because it didn’t happen that way. Don’t worry yourself. Plus, I like to think we would have met eventually.”

  “How? Even if we did meet who’s to say we would have …” I pause to think of the correct word. I’m trying not to imagine life without him, but the part of me who fears later is making it hard. “Seen each other the way we do now?”

  “The way I see you had nothing to do with timing. Trust me,” he adds, sensing my rebuttal. “From the moment I met you, you were under my skin.”

  “Because I was bullied?” I recall how when he met me my lip was bloody. Nessa was still a real threat. I was in the middle of something I didn’t see a way out of.

  “Not entirely. It was a lot of things. The fact that you were bullied was one among many reasons. Now that I’m here I can openly admit the main reason was simply because of you. Your answers to my questions were nothing like what I expected. The look in your eyes as though there was nothing I could do to help you made me want to help you that much more. The way you spoke as if you were all alone made me want to be there for you. The sound of your voice, the way your skin felt when I touched you, and how you made me completely forget about Layla—those are the reasons you were under my skin.”

  I bite my lip. “You felt all that in one day?”

  His smile grows. I’m jealous the road gets to see it and not me. “Kael, I felt all that in less than an hour. The moment you left my classroom that first day I couldn’t get you out of my head. I knew it was wrong. Of course, I knew it. But I couldn’t help myself. I hadn’t wanted something so badly in my entire life the way I wanted you. I’ve always had what I needed. Girlfriends, flings, and women that didn’t matter. But all of a sudden, my relationship was falling apart. I didn’t know who I was anymore. Was I the guy Layla said I was, or was I still the guy she met? I was going through the motions every day. I was so damn unhappy I didn’t even realize it until you made me smile. You remember the first time you made me smile?”

  “No,” I whisper, heart in my throat.

  “You told me your name. I felt like I won a small victory. I knew your name. What else could I know? The more I did learn, the more I wanted to know. I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of hearing your answers to the questions I ask. So now you know. I think I’ve been in love with you from the second you looked at me with those dark blue eyes. How long did it take you to realize I was a total catch?” He smirks easily, as if he didn’t take my heart and stake his claim.

  I feel completely and shamefully unworthy of him.

  “I know it didn’t happen that way for you,” he assures me. “That’s all right. Love takes time. You don’t have to worry about hurting my feelings.”

  I can’t believe I wasted a second wanting someone else when I had this breathtaking man right in front of me. It should’ve been that way for me. I should have looked into his eyes that first day and fell in. I did, but I had to crawl out of Brady’s lies first. I think I needed something from Julian before love, for him to be there for no reason other than because he wanted to. Only then could I feel it.

  “Don’t get mad?”

  “I promise.” He holds his hand in the air.

  I take a deep breath and t
ry to put my feelings into words. “The day I slept with Brady I was so numb afterward. I was alone, hurting, and so ashamed I couldn’t stand myself. And then I walked into your classroom, and for the first time, I didn’t want to be alone anymore. I think that was the day I realized I wanted something more from you.”

  The afternoon spent under the peaches was the same afternoon I understood I wanted more from everyone and everything. It was growth within pain. Smelling the fruit even as it rotted beneath my feet. Some lessons were hard to learn, but with knowledge, pain could become the past and not the future.

  “After that I was freefalling,” I keep going before he can think too hard about Brady. “I felt so good around you. I never felt good around anyone. You made me laugh. You made me feel safe when everyone else hurt me. You were patient and caring.” I can’t hold it in anymore. My tears fall fast and hard. “I don’t deserve you.”

  He laughs in shocked disbelief. “Where did those tears come from? Come on, Kael. You were just telling me how unbelievably amazing I am. Don’t stop now. Keep going.”

  “You are amazing,” I blubber. I wipe my tears, unable to look at him. “You made me feel beautiful when I thought I was anything but. You saved me, Julian. How could I ever mean that much to you?”

  “Hey,” he says softly, grabbing my hand off my lap. “Look at me.”

  I unwillingly meet his gray gaze.

  “Imagine everything you’ve ever wanted in life. Picture it,” he urges when I scowl.

  I picture him.

  “You see it?” I nod uncertainly. “Is it everything you’ve ever wanted?” I nod again. “That’s exactly how much you mean to me. You’re going to have to trust that. We have to trust each other. You trust me, don’t you?”

  I bring his hand to my lips and kiss his knuckles. “You know I do.”

  “Then start trying it out. Every time you start to doubt anything try and trust me instead. I know it’s hard. But it’s a lot harder driving yourself crazy, isn’t it? Let’s talk about something else,” he suggests, sensing my downfall.