Searching for Love: The Complete Story

by Christine Kersey

  “Thanks. I enjoy cooking.”

  “It shows.”

  “What about you?” he asked as he took two bowls from the cupboard. “Do you like to cook?”

  “Not particularly.” Reese laughed. “I get my creative outlet from photography.”

  Brody scooped two generous helpings of fruit into each bowl, then placed them, along with the mousse, on a tray, and carried them to the dining room table. “I thought we’d eat dessert in here. It’s getting a little chilly outside.”

  “Chilly?” Reese held back a snort of laughter. “Have you ever experienced a winter in the Midwest? It feels downright balmy outside to me.”

  His eyebrows rose. “We can eat outside if you’d prefer.”

  Reese moved to the dining room. “That’s okay. I’m just teasing you anyway. It is a little cool out there.”

  “Let me help you,” Brody said after he set the tray on the table, then reached for her chair.

  She slid into the seat, and when Brody brushed his fingers across her bare shoulder, a shock of electricity zinged through her. He stood beside her, and she looked up at him. He gazed down at her, and when their eyes met, his magnetism sent an ache to her heart, a feeling she had been suppressing ever since her marriage had become irretrievably broken.

  “Thank you,” she whispered, if only to draw her mind away from the stirrings that were coming to life inside her.

  “You’re welcome.” He dragged the words out, his voice deep. A moment later he sat across from her, then placed a dish of fruit and a dish of mousse in front of her, along with a spoon, then did the same for himself.

  Knowing he was watching her, and suddenly very self-conscious, Reese picked up her spoon and scooped up half a spoonful of mousse, then placed it in her mouth. It was as tasty as she had suspected, and when she looked at Brody, his eyebrows were raised in question. “I like it.”

  He smiled, then took a bite of his mousse. “I admit, I ate some earlier. You know, to make sure it turned out okay.”

  “I would’ve done the same thing.”

  They both laughed.

  Brody tried not to stare at Reese as she ate. Her reaction when he had touched her skin had been exactly what he had been hoping for. Ever since he had met her, she had seemed distant, but he knew his touch had reached something inside her. He had felt her reaction to the brush of his fingers, and he knew she was as attracted to him as he was to her.

  They ate their dessert in relative silence, and he wondered what she was thinking. He knew what he was thinking. He was thinking that he hoped to at least get a kiss from her tonight. So many women were willing to give much more than that after a first date, but he found it refreshing—and challenging—that when it came to Reese, even a kiss would be considered a victory.

  “Would you like more?” Brody asked when Reese had finished.

  “Oh no. I’m so full I’m not sure I’ll be able to move for a little while.”

  Her flat stomach didn’t look at all full to him, but he was more than happy to let her stay for as long as she wanted.

  “If you’d like, we can move to the couch.” He smiled. “That would be a more comfortable place for you to recover.”

  She laughed. “Okay.”

  Reese sat on the couch that faced the ocean, and though it was dark outside, she could hear the waves crashing on the shore.

  “May I?” Brody asked, gesturing to the space beside her.

  Reese looked at his handsome face and met his blue-green eyes, and before she let herself think too much about it, she nodded, and Brody settled in beside her. A narrow wedge of space lay between them, but she found herself liking having him near.

  “If you thought that sunset was spectacular,” he said as he looked at her, “you should see the sunrises.”

  “I have,” she quickly said. “They’re breathtaking.”

  He smiled and nodded, and she wondered if his comment had implied an invitation.

  Sixteen

  They sat in silence for several moments, and Reese wondered what Brody’s expectations were. There was no way she was going to jump into bed with him. She hardly knew him. Besides, she had only been with one man in her life. Her ex-husband, Josh. For her to be intimate with any man, she would have to have deep feelings for him. She wasn’t about to put her heart out there in that way. Not anytime soon.

  “Can I get you anything to drink?” Brody asked.

  Reese had never been much of a drinker—she preferred to be in complete control of herself at all times. Even though she knew a little wine might relax her, after seeing what alcohol had done to her parents, she had a strong desire to stay away from it. “No, I’m fine. Thanks.”

  “What made you become interested in photography?” Brody asked.

  She knew the answer to his question—it was a way to focus outside of myself and my problems—but she wasn’t about to tell him that. Instead, she told him about the time she had picked up her first camera.

  “When I was eleven, a friend of my brother’s had gotten a camera for his birthday and he brought it over to our place to show Seth. He was fourteen at the time, and when the two of them left to go hang out with some other friends, his friend—his name was Derrick—accidentally left the camera at our place.”

  Reese laughed. “Well, I wanted to see what all the fuss was about, so I picked it up, took it outside, and took pictures of some things that were interesting to me. When Derrick took the film in to get it developed—” Reese smiled. “This was when digital cameras were too expensive for most people. So when he took it in to get developed and found the pictures I’d taken, he was pretty mad. It wasn’t cheap to get those developed.”

  Brody laughed. “I remember those old cameras.”

  A little surprised that he hadn’t had the latest and greatest technology all his life, Reese continued. “Anyway, when he gave me the pictures I’d taken, I was captivated. I thought they looked amazing. It was like . . . well, like I’d captured a moment in time that would never happen again. I loved it and I wanted more.”

  The light of joy in Reese’s eyes drew Brody in. “So, did your parents get you a camera for your birthday?”

  The light went out and she looked at her lap. “No. Not that year.”

  “Oh.” It was becoming more and more obvious that her childhood had been nothing like the carefree and happy time his had been.

  She looked up and met his gaze. “I had to put my interest on hold for a while. But my brother knew how much I had loved it, and when he had enough money, he bought me my first camera.”

  The light was back, much to Brody’s relief. He hated it when she seemed down, and he realized that the more time he spent with her, the more his desire to make her happy grew. “Sounds like you have a great brother.” He remembered how her brother Seth was the only family member she had been willing to talk about.

  “Yeah, he is. I don’t get to see him much though.”

  “You said he’s in the military.”

  “Yes. I don’t hear from him often, and I see him even less. But we’re still close.”

  Brody was close to his entire family. He wondered what it would be like if he only had one person in his family he was close to. It was hard to imagine, and he knew how lucky he was.

  “I should probably get going,” Reese said, then she stood and walked to the kitchen counter where her blouse was laid out. She touched the fabric, then turned to Brody. “It’s not quite dry.”

  He wanted her to stay, but he didn’t want to be pushy, or seem desperate. “You can bring Avery’s shirt back when you come to the dinner party.” Although he hoped he would see her before then.

  “Okay.” She picked up her blouse, then lifted her purse from the table by the door that led to the beach. “Thank you for dinner, Brody.”

  He liked the way his name sounded coming from her mouth. “I’m sorry the bird crapped on you.”

  She laughed. “I guess that’s one of the hazards of living on the beach.”<
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  “Yeah.” He took a step toward her, still eager to touch her in some way. “Let me walk you home.”

  She shook her head. “No, that’s okay. I’ll be fine.”

  He didn’t like the idea of her walking home alone when it was completely dark. “What would your brother say if I let you walk home in the dark, all by yourself?”

  That seemed to give her pause. “I suppose he wouldn’t like it. But he’s not here.”

  Frustration made him push a little harder than he normally would have. “Why won’t you let me walk me you home, Reese?” What are you hiding?

  She smiled, but it seemed to falter. “I just like my independence. What’s the big deal?”

  “I just don’t feel comfortable letting you walk home by yourself when it’s dark out.” His jaw tightened. “It wouldn’t be right for me to stand by and not make sure you got home safely.”

  She could see his point, but that didn’t change the fact that she wanted to prevent him from knowing her circumstances. Yes, the RV park was quite nice, but her RV wasn’t. It was old and ugly. And it was the only home she had. “Are you saying it’s not safe to walk on the beach?”

  “I don’t know who’s out there, so I can’t really say one way or the other.” He gazed at her a moment, then a small smile curved his mouth. “What if a wave catches you off-guard and drags you into the ocean?”

  The idea made Reese shudder, and though she knew Brody was just trying to scare her in a joking way, it also made her rethink her stubbornness. “That wouldn’t happen. I’ll stay well away from the water.”

  “Oh yeah,” he said with a frown, his tone sarcastic. “That sounds much safer. That’s only where random people could be. People who could be up to no good.” A sigh slipped from his mouth. “Come on, Reese. I won’t be able to rest unless I know you’re safe.”

  Touched by his concern, she was still reluctant to give in. “I’ll text you when I’m safely home.”

  “And where is that home anyway?”

  “Ah. So that’s what this is about. You want to know where I live.”

  He laughed. “Of course I’m curious. But truly, I’m concerned about your safety.” His eyebrows rose. “Maybe I need to tell your brother that you’re not being careful.”

  Reese knew that Seth worried about her. If he knew she was taking chances on her well-being because of her pride, he would be angry. Of course Brody had no way of getting a hold of Seth, but his point was made. “Fine,” she said, though she wasn’t happy about it. “You can walk me most of the way home. Just to the PCH.”

  Seventeen

  The look of surprise on Brody’s face made her want to laugh, but she held it back.

  “Okay, then,” he said. “Let’s go.”

  They walked down the stairs to the beach, and when they reached the sand, Reese took off her sandals and carried them. Brody did the same.

  “Walking in the sand is a good workout,” she said as they walked along, their toes digging into the soft granules.

  “That’s why I prefer to walk on the wet sand,” he said. “It’s much firmer.”

  She could see his smile in the moonlight.

  “Shall we?” He gestured to the sand closer to the ocean.

  With a soft laugh, she said, “As long as no waves grab me and drag me in.”

  They reached the wet sand, with him standing between her and the ocean. “I’ll protect you,” he said, then he took her hand in his.

  His touch sent a rush of energy to her heart, and though her instinct was to pull away, she forced herself to relax and savor his touch instead. It had been a while since she had had physical contact with anyone, and she realized she missed it. Once her marriage had ended she had had no one to turn to, and with her brother overseas, she had no one to give her so much as a hug once in a while. Something, she now realized, she craved.

  When he had taken her hand, Brody had felt her initial tensing, but almost immediately he had felt her relax. Glad to know she didn’t seem to mind his touch, he enjoyed the feel of her skin against his, even if it was just the skin of her hand.

  “It’s a beautiful evening,” he said as he glanced at the quarter moon.

  “And I have yet to see any random people hanging out on the beach,” Reese said.

  He laughed. “You never know what you’ll find.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  Somehow it feels like a great victory, her agreeing to let me walk her home. Well, part of the way home. I don’t know what that means. What will happen when we reach the PCH? Will she vanish in a cloud of pixie dust?

  The thought made him smile.

  Waves crashed near them, and Brody vowed to do all he could to help Reese feel comfortable going into the water. He loved the ocean and couldn’t imagine her fear.

  “Will you meet me on the beach tomorrow?” he asked, wanting to begin to allay her fears right away.

  She turned and looked at him. “Why?”

  A smile of confidence curved his mouth. “So I can teach you to body surf.”

  “Ha,” she said in a burst of laughter. “Not likely.”

  Undeterred, he said, “Okay. How about you come watch me do it first? Then if you want, you can try it.”

  She seemed to consider it. “I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to watch you do it.”

  Triumph swept over him. “Great! What time works for you?”

  “How about after breakfast? Like nine?”

  A new idea sprang to his mind. “How about I take you out to breakfast first?”

  Anxiety swelled within Reese.

  I’m really starting to like this man. And he seems to like me. I don’t know if I’m ready for this. I need to slow things down.

  “Reese?”

  “Let’s just meet on the beach at nine.”

  “If that’s what you’d prefer.”

  She couldn’t see his face clearly in the soft moonlight, but she sensed his disappointment. “Yes, that will work better for me.” What is your problem, Reese? Why can’t you just go with it? Why do you have to make this into more than it is?

  The occasional sound of a car rushing down the PCH floated on the air, and a moment later the PCH came into view.

  “Thanks for walking me back,” Reese said as she stopped, hopeful Brody would take the hint and let her go the rest of the way on her own.

  “What?” he said with a chuckle. “You live on the beach?”

  Frustrated that her plans weren’t going as she had wanted, she said, “Of course not, but I can take it from here.”

  Brody’s voice softened. “I’m sure you can, but I’m not about to leave you in the middle of the beach all by yourself. Not at night.”

  Reese glanced around, then met Brody’s gaze. “No one’s here. Besides, I’m a big girl.”

  “I have no doubt that you can take care of yourself,” he said, “but that doesn’t change the fact that I hope I’m enough of a gentleman to see you all the way home.”

  So that was his plan. To guilt me into letting him walk me all the way back. Reese considered her next move. Would it really be so terrible for him to know I’m staying at the RV park? What’s the worst that can happen? He’ll find out I’m only staying here temporarily? Maybe that’s a good thing. That will make it clear that there’s no future for us. Besides, I don’t have to let him see my pathetic little home.

  Relieved to have made the decision, and more than relieved to not have to hide the truth of her circumstances—well, most of it—Reese faced Brody. “I’m staying at the RV park.”

  “Oh,” he said, her answer clearly unexpected.

  She wondered what he was thinking, and a twinge of uncertainty at telling him the truth gripped her. Is he going to be like Josh and tell me I’m not good enough?

  She looked away from him.

  No, he would never say it straight out. But he’ll think it. Of course he will. Especially when he discovers the whole truth about me. The truth that he’s way out of my league. The truth that my ow
n husband told me to my face that I don’t measure up, that I would be a liability to him.

  Her gaze went back to his face.

  Unless I leave.

  The thought brought a sudden pain to her heart, and she realized she was beginning to care about him more than she had known.

  “That’s a nice RV park,” he said.

  Trying to push away her sadness at the inevitable conclusion to this budding friendship, Reese asked, “You’ve been in it?”

  “Yeah. A while back a friend of mine stayed there while he was traveling the country in his RV.”

  I’ll bet his RV wasn’t his only home. The weight of her self-doubt settled over her like a poisonous fog. I’ll bet it wasn’t a thirty-year-old rust bucket either.

  Eighteen

  The moonlight gave off just enough illumination for Brody to see Reese’s face, although he couldn’t tell what was going through her head.

  “Shall we continue?” he asked.

  “Sure.”

  They walked toward the PCH in silence, but all Brody could think about was that Reese didn’t live in Malibu. She was only visiting. Time for getting to know her was ticking away. Sudden urgency to spend as much time with her as possible washed over him.

  “Are you sure you won’t go to breakfast with me?” he asked.

  She glanced at him. “Why?”

  He stopped and turned her to face him. “You’re not going to be in Malibu long, are you?”

  She stared at him, her expression ambivalent. “I don’t know.” Then she looked at the sand before meeting his gaze. “Probably not.”

  “Which is why I want to spend time with you, Reese.” Wanting to convey his interest in her, he brushed his hands against her bare upper arms.

  The touch of his hands against her skin sent a wave of desire coursing through her and she had to control herself to keep from leaning towards him. Those feelings of need, combined with the look of sincerity on his face, nearly did her in. But she had to be strong. She couldn’t let her body dictate what she would do. She knew she needed to keep some distance between them. She had to protect her heart at all costs.