Searching for Love: The Complete Story

by Christine Kersey

  “Are you okay?” he asked as he continued to hold her with one arm. The water was up to his chin, and he used his other arm like a rudder, keeping himself steady.

  “Yes. Thanks to you.”

  He grinned at her. “I told you I’d keep you safe.”

  Pressed up against him, feeling so safe and secure, Reese gazed at his face. “You did say that. And you kept your word.”

  Brody wished he wasn’t wearing his wetsuit just then. He would have liked to feel her soft skin against his. Regardless, he was glad he had a good excuse to cradle her against him. And he was glad he had kept her from being pulled under. When the wave had crashed over them, he hadn’t been certain he could manage it after all.

  “Are you okay out this far?” He smiled. “Just don’t think about the creatures below you.”

  She laughed. “As long as you promise to fight off any sharks that want to take a bite out of me, I suppose it will be okay.”

  “I’ll do my best.”

  “I think I can tread water,” she said with a smile.

  Her mouth was mere inches from his, and his desire to kiss her was overwhelming. But he didn’t want to do something she didn’t want, and her telling him that she could tread water sounded like she didn’t want to be so close to him. “Okay.” Disappointed, he released her.

  Reese half-wished he hadn’t let her go. She had liked being in his arms. She had liked it too much, which is why she had implied he could let her go. His lips had been so close, so temptingly close. She had almost leaned in for a kiss. But that would just make it harder to leave, which she knew she needed to do before she let him get too close. Why give him the chance to break her heart? There was no way they could be together. They were all wrong for each other. For now she would simply enjoy his company and consider him one of her very few friends.

  “Can you touch the bottom?” Reese asked as her arms fluttered in the water, trying to think of something besides how attracted she was to him.

  “Just barely.”

  “Should we go where it’s shallower?”

  “I think it’s time to try some body surfing,” Brody said. “What do you think?”

  “I think I’d be happy to watch you bodysurf while I get some sun.”

  They made their back to the beach without incident where Reese stretched out on her towel, propping herself up on her elbows.

  Brody picked up his board. “I’ll be back in a while.”

  “Okay.” She watched him go, admiring the graceful way he moved despite his strongly muscled body. When she thought about the way it had felt to be crushed against his chest, a wave of heat pulsed through her.

  I could get used to being that close to him.

  She immediately pushed the thought away.

  Don’t imagine something that would be a mistake.

  She took a water bottle out of her tote to quench her thirst—and to distract herself—then wondered if Brody wanted some. Her gaze went to him, following his movements as he used his board to ride the waves to shore. It looked like fun, although she wasn’t quite ready to try it herself.

  After spreading a fresh coat of sunscreen over her skin, Reese put on her sunglasses and lay back on her towel. She closed her eyes and thought about the man she had met less than a week before. He had been good to her, and he seemed so sweet and caring. She hoped getting to know his siblings the next evening would help her to get to know him better.

  What are you thinking, Reese? Why do you want to get to know him better? You’ll be leaving Malibu soon. You have to. You need to get on with your life. You don’t need to have Brody—or any other man—in it to be happy.

  She pictured herself packing up her RV and heading out—alone. Loneliness engulfed her, but she believed she would be better off on her own. That way no one could fail her. The sad truth was, the only person in her life who hadn’t failed her was her brother. But she hardly saw him.

  You’re better off by yourself, Reese. You just need to accept that.

  Twenty-Two

  Brody walked toward Reese, who looked liked she had fallen asleep on her towel. As he got closer, his gaze glided over her body, which was barely covered by her bikini. He liked what he saw, but more than that, he liked her. The vulnerability she couldn’t hide had gotten to him.

  Do you like her because she seems vulnerable, or is it something more?

  He thought about that. Her vulnerability brought out his need to protect, but more than that, he liked how she lived on her own, her independence. He didn’t know much about her story, but he had gathered that she had overcome some hardships in her life and had taken charge. That appealed to him even more than her need to be loved and cared for. But that need tugged at him in ways that had taken him by surprise.

  He stopped beside her, squatting on the sand. “Do you have any more water?”

  She sat up, but with her sunglasses on, he couldn’t see her eyes. “Yes.” She reached into a tote beside her and pulled out a bottle of water, then handed it to him.

  He gulped it down. “Thanks.”

  She removed her sunglasses. “Are you done body surfing?”

  As much as he wanted to spend all day with her, he had to work. “Unfortunately, yes. I need to get back and do some work.”

  “I understand.”

  He settled into the sand and faced her. “Did you enjoy playing in the waves?”

  A smile curved her mouth. “Yes. I’m glad you talked me into it.”

  He remembered how it had felt to have her in his arms, against his body, and wished they were still in the water, still physically close. “I’m glad you agreed.”

  Reese laughed, but as she gazed into his blue-green eyes, eyes that looked so much like the ocean, she felt drawn to him, and wished they had a chance. She didn’t want to be alone. She didn’t want to live her life by herself. She wanted to share her ups and downs with someone else. With Brody.

  “Will you come for dinner tonight?” he asked.

  Her heart wanted nothing more, but her head resisted. “I’m not sure if that would be a good idea.”

  Why do you have to be so logical, Reese? Why can’t you trust your heart?

  She knew why. Because her heart hadn’t earned her trust.

  “You know,” Brody said with a half-smile. “I could really use your help with planning tomorrow’s dinner party.”

  Reese wasn’t sure she believed he needed any help, but his appeal to the helpful side of her was hard to resist.

  “It’s almost like you and I are hosting it,” he said as his smile grew. “You don’t want me to screw it up, now do you?”

  She certainly didn’t want that. But she knew what he was doing, and she pointed at him as she tilted her head. “You’re very clever, Brody. I’ll give you that.”

  He chuckled. “Is that what I am?”

  She slipped her sunglasses back on. “Yes. But it’s working. I’ll come.”

  “Good. Does six o’clock work for you?”

  “Yes. But what can I bring to contribute?” She didn’t have much, but she didn’t want him to always be the one to provide everything.

  “How about you bring dessert?”

  “Sounds good.”

  “I look forward to it.” He stared at her, and she wondered if he was going to kiss her, but after a moment he stood. “I’ll see you this evening. Dress casual.”

  She nodded. “Don’t work too hard.”

  He laughed. “I’ll try not to.”

  A moment later he turned and walked away. Reese watched him until he was out of sight, then she packed up her things and headed back to her RV.

  Brody turned the steak over on the grill, his gaze straying to the beach, watching for Reese’s arrival. Confident she would come, he thought about their interaction earlier that day. Having her in his arms while in the deeper water had been an unexpected pleasure, one he hoped to repeat on dry land.

  Smiling at the thought, he looked up the beach again, but Reese was nowhere i
n sight. By six fifteen he began to worry.

  That’ll teach you to be overconfident.

  With a frown, he turned off the grill and closed the lid to keep the meat warm without cooking it.

  “Brody,” a voice called from the beach below.

  He looked up. Reese. A burst of joy shot through him, taking him by surprise.

  She reached the base of the stairs that led to his house and began climbing while Brody hurried to meet her. Though he wanted to sweep her into his arms as easily as he had in the ocean earlier that day, he schooled his impulse and instead held the door open for her so she could step into his house.

  “I’m sorry I’m late,” she said with a sardonic smile. “I had a little trouble with my dessert.”

  He glanced at the paper plate she held in her hands, which was filled with brownies. “They look delicious.”

  She laughed. “They took a little longer to cook in my RV oven than I’d anticipated.” She smiled. “Shall I put them in the kitchen?”

  “I’ll take them for you.” She handed the plate to him, and he stepped toward the kitchen.

  She held out Avery’s shirt. “Here’s your sister’s shirt, laundered and everything.”

  He smiled. “Thanks. Can I get you something to drink?”

  “I’d love some ice water.”

  “I made lemonade earlier. Would that be okay?”

  She smiled. “That sounds great.”

  He set the plate on the counter then poured lemonade for both of them and held out the glasses. “Dinner’s ready, so if you’d carry these outside, I’ll get the rest of the food.”

  “Sure.” Reese turned and went out to the balcony.

  Brody watched her go, his gaze sliding over her shapely legs, pausing on the back of her khaki shorts, then climbing to her shoulders. Forcing his thoughts to something besides his desire to touch her, he focused on the profile of her face before gathering the salad and rolls and carrying them out to the balcony and setting them on the table.

  “Smells great out here,” she said.

  He smiled. “I grilled steak.”

  Twenty-Three

  Salmon one night, steak the next. A bit different from what I’m used to. Holding back a small frown, Reese nodded. “Great.”

  Brody laughed. “In case you can’t tell, grilling’s kind of my specialty.”

  She pushed a smile onto her face. “It’s a good specialty to have.”

  Brody pulled out a chair. “Shall we sit?”

  “Sure.” Reese sat in the chair he held out for her, but when he paused behind her, inches away, she caught her breath, wondering what he was doing, hoping he would touch her. A moment later he stepped toward the grill, and sharp disappointment pierced her.

  “These are definitely ready,” he said, his back to her as he put the meat on a serving platter.

  Her gaze went to his muscular body, clothed in a pair of casual dress shorts and a short-sleeved button up shirt. His broad shoulders filled the shirt nicely, tapering to a trim waist, and she remembered how he had looked when he had unzipped his wetsuit and pulled it down to his waist. He turned, and Reese lifted her gaze to his incredibly handsome face.

  Desire tugged at her insides—desire to be touched by him, kissed by him, loved by him.

  The realization took her by surprise, but she immediately dismissed it. I don’t need his love. I don’t need anyone’s love. I’m fine on my own. I’m better off on my own.

  Brody set the serving platter on the table between them, then sat across from her with a warm smile. “Help yourself.”

  Reese took the smaller steak, a roll, filled her plate with salad, then sliced off a bite-sized piece of meat.

  “I’m glad to see you’re a meat eater,” Brody said with a grin.

  She laughed. “You forget, I’m from the Midwest.”

  “Oh, I didn’t forget.”

  The look in his eye—one of intense interest—sent a zing of desire through her, and her gaze slid to her plate. Uncomfortable with her mixed feelings, she decided a change in topic would help. She looked up and met his gaze, which hadn’t wavered from her. “Speaking of meat,” she said, “what did you have in mind for tomorrow’s dinner party?”

  A smile slowly curved his mouth, and she could tell he knew she was changing the topic on purpose.

  “I was thinking Tri-Tip,” he said.

  Reese’s eyebrows rose. “That’s one of my favorites.” Even though I’ve only had it a couple of times, each time grilled by Josh.

  “Great,” he said. “Tri-Tip it is. What about sides?”

  They discussed food options as they ate their meal, and came up with a menu that sounded great to Reese.

  “I hope you’ll have time to help me put it all together before the party,” Brody said.

  Time is something I have a lot of. But do I want to commit to spending so much of it with you? “Of course,” she said without allowing her inner voice to talk her out of it, hoping she wouldn’t later regret it.

  Brody kept his smile under control, not wanting to show how immensely pleased he was that his plan to spend as much time with Reese as possible was working so well. For all he knew, she would be gone in days, and he wanted to get in as much time as possible before that. Maybe even convince her to extend her visit. “Good.”

  “What do you want me to bring?”

  “I’ll do the grocery shopping if you’ll help me prepare the food.” He paused a beat. “In fact, why don’t you go to the store with me?” Hoping that didn’t seem too lame, he waited to see what she would say.

  “Uh . . .”

  “Let me just point out that some of the things we’re having were your idea, so you should help me pick out the ingredients.” He could see the indecision in her eyes.

  “I have a few things I need to get done,” Reese said, which was a total and complete lie. Her schedule was wide open. “What time are you planning on going?”

  “I can work around your schedule.”

  So much for trying the old I have stuff to do excuse. Anyway, why am I so resistant to spending time with him? But she knew why. The more she got to know him, the more she was starting to fall for him. A complication she could do without. Falling for a man she had known less than a week would definitely screw up her plans to claim her independence and really get to know herself.

  Then again, what he said was true. She had suggested some of the menu items, so it was only fair that she help him shop for the makings. “After lunch would work.” At least I can pretend I have stuff to do. And I can use the morning to take pictures.

  “Okay,” he said with a smile. “I can pick you up at one or so.”

  “All right.”

  As they continued eating, Brody told her about his younger siblings, Logan and Avery. “Avery’s working toward her medical degree, so her schedule can be pretty crazy.”

  Reese could tell he was proud of her, but hearing about her high aspirations reminded her that she came from a much different background. “What about Logan? What does he do?”

  “He recently finished earning his engineering degree, and now he has a fantastic job that he seems to really like.”

  “That’s great.” Feeling even more out of her depth—her family wasn’t well-educated at all—she pretended all was well. Maybe their mother had a serious disease, which made Avery want to find a cure. She didn’t know why she thought that would make her feel better. Maybe if Avery’s reasons were altruistic in nature, that would somehow make her less intimidating. “What made Avery want to pursue a medical degree?”

  Brody smiled. “Our father’s a plastic surgeon and she always wanted to be just like him.”

  The pit that had begun to sink in her stomach when she had learned that both of his siblings were so much more educated than she was dropped like a stone at the announcement that his father was a plastic surgeon. “Oh.” An absurd thought popped into Reese’s head. That means your father can write drug prescriptions. My father’s well ac
quainted with handing out drugs too. Only he sold them. And now he’s in prison.

  Shame poured over her like acid and her skin heated. “I need to use the restroom.” Nearly leaping from her seat, she cringed as her chair scraped across the balcony.

  Always the gentleman, Brody stood as she turned away from him and strode to the door that led inside.

  Twenty-Four

  With her palms pressed flat against the cool granite countertop in the guest bathroom, Reese stared at her reflection in the mirror.

  What are you doing? Why are you spending any time with this man when clearly there’s no future for you with him? Do you want to have your heart shattered again? Wasn’t it bad enough that Josh, the boy you knew in high school, the boy who knew your circumstances and professed to love you, even he said you aren’t good enough. What makes you think Brody will find you acceptable? You will never fit in with his family or friends. Never.

  Devastated to realize that she had been fooling herself these last few days, her eyes shone with tears.

  Don’t be such a baby. Hold your head high and walk out of here, back to your pathetic, crappy little RV. Back to your pathetic, crappy little life.

  A tear crested her eyelid and slid down her cheek. Irritated with herself, she swiped it away and pushed a fake smile onto her mouth—that’s it, Reese. Pretend all is well.

  With a last glance in the mirror, she unlocked the door and slowly walked into the living room, trying to sear the memory of this place into her mind—because she knew she would never see it again.

  Brody wondered if Reese was okay. She had seemed upset when she had excused herself, and he worried that he had said something wrong. After several minutes, he decided to check on her. He stood, then walked to the door that led inside and pulled it open.

  “Reese.” She stood in the middle of his living room, staring at the ocean.