Dark Heart Forever

by Lee Monroe

  ‘Everyone is looking at you,’ he said. ‘The belle of the ball.’

  ‘Really?’ I felt myself blushing. It was as if this was some incredible magic dream. Every girl’s dream. Holding Luca’s gaze as we danced, my insides skipped with excitement. Pure, innocent pleasure. It was all right to feel like that, I told myself. Just for one night. It didn’t mean anything. I still had a boyfriend.

  Finally I dragged my eyes away, concentrating on my footwork. Thankfully Luca seemed to know exactly what he was doing. He moved in an assured, unselfconscious way.

  ‘You really can dance,’ I said, knowing I really couldn’t, but enjoying myself all the same.

  ‘Had to learn,’ Luca replied, a little out of breath as he took my arm and I twirled, laughing and swung back to him. ‘You don’t?’

  ‘It’s all part of the ritual humiliation of mortal life for a young person – not having a clue how to dance or talk to boys,’ I told him.

  ‘I wouldn’t say that,’ he said quickly, his eyes darting away as he spoke. I hid a smile, sidestepping an overeager man in a long dark-blue dinner jacket with a matching blue streak in his hair. The man, in his twenties, flashed me a toothy smile.

  ‘Valdar,’ whispered Luca. ‘Vanya’s son.’

  ‘But she doesn’t look a day over thirty,’ I said, slowing down. I stole another look at Valdar, whose dance partner studied me with narrowed eyes. ‘They look like brother and sister.’

  ‘Vanya stopped ageing in her late-twenties, as most of them do. Vampires are so vain.’ He pulled a face. ‘No pun intended.’

  The music stopped and people drifted away from the dance floor to gather at the sides of the room, by the refreshment tables. A group of young, black-haired boys, guzzled a tomato-red concoction. Blood? I shuddered then, remembering that the people in this room could literally drain the life out of me, if they chose to.

  ‘Do you think anyone suspects I’m mortal?’ I said quietly to Luca as we began wandering over to a vacant ottoman-style sofa by the door.

  ‘Mortal?’ came a shrill voice next to me, and I froze. Tilly appeared, her wild curly hair in even more disarray. Her slinky velvet dress clung to her sylphlike body. She swooned slightly, and my heart beat slowed down. If she was drunk…

  ‘What are you talking about, Tilly?’ Luca’s voice was light, but one of his hands found mine and held on to it.

  ‘She said something about a mortal.’ Tilly’s eyes gleamed. ‘Is there one here? In the palace?’

  ‘Don’t be ridiculous.’ Luca’s expression was puzzled. ‘You’ve had too much grape juice, Tilly. You’re imagining things.’

  Tilly lifted her head and trained her almond-shaped eyes on me. ‘She said it.’ She came closer to me and her nose twitched, as though she was sniffing me. ‘You have appeared from nowhere, Miss … Who are you?’

  ‘I …’ I began, glancing over to Luca. ‘I’m Jane, a southern werewolf.’ I kept my voice as steady as I could.

  ‘Hmmm.’ She lingered closely for a second longer and my breath seemed to freeze in my throat. I remembered what Luca had said: witches can do you harm just by looking at you. My eyes slid away from her.

  ‘I have excellent hearing,’ she told Luca haughtily. ‘As you well know.’

  ‘Of course,’ he said, smiling very convincingly at her. ‘But the grapes can tamper with the senses, can’t they?’

  Tilly looked down at her glass, which was empty, and sniffed. ‘Possibly,’ she said, her voice crackling. She shook her head in an eccentric motion. ‘When are they serving cake?’ she said truculently. ‘Or do we have to endure one of those dreary speeches before they bring it out?’

  Luca’s lips twitched in a genuine smile then and my body relaxed.

  The sound of metal clinking against glass drew everyone’s attention to the front of the room, where Celeste stood patiently waiting for quiet.

  ‘Having a nice time?’ Vanya licked her lips uncomfortably close to me and I fought the instinct to jerk away from her. That would certainly give me away.

  ‘Very nice, thank you,’ I said politely, noticing for the first time a small diamond stud embedded in her dainty nose.

  She smiled, lifting a finger as though to wipe an invisible tear from her eye. ‘I find these little get-togethers so touching.’

  Milton appeared behind her, wrapping his arms around her willowy frame. ‘Such a softie, aren’t you, sweetest?’ he said silkily. ‘Personally, these occasions simply make me hungry.’ As I turned I found him staring directly at me, and I coloured slightly. ‘No decent food, you see,’ he went on. ‘Just a lot of drab offerings on trays.’

  I smiled, terrified all of a sudden. Milton and Vanya had arranged themselves so that they were hemming me in. My eyes darted around to locate Luca, but he stood the other side of Tilly, who was muttering something into his ear.

  The noise in the room disappeared then, as Celeste finally called everyone to hush.

  I stepped slowly backwards, but met a solid arm. I kept my eyes on Luca, but he stared straight ahead as Celeste spoke in a gentle but powerful voice to us all. Realising there was no escape for now, I stayed put, only half listening to the speech, much more aware of my pounding heart. Hours seemed to pass until Celeste finished talking, raising her glass to the guests. The orchestra began tuning up and I edged forward.

  ‘Best stay put, darling,’ Vanya bent to whisper to me. ‘Luca is escorting that wretched Tilly to the powder room.’ She smiled at me as I lifted my head to look at her. ‘Milton and I will be your company until he returns.’

  With a growing sense of panic I watched Luca half pulling, half carrying the reluctant Tilly through the double doors, conscious of Vanya’s hand on my elbow.

  Come on, Luca, I willed, training my eyes on the door. Instead of Luca, Lowe appeared, following one of the serving girls as she collected empty plates and glasses.

  ‘Lowe!’ I called loudly, surprising myself.

  He frowned, turning this way and that. To my relief his eyes found me. For one awful moment I thought he was going to turn away and leave me in Vanya’s clutches, but he strode across the room, a facetious grin on his face.

  ‘Oh dear. Has he abandoned you already?’ he said, nodding curtly at the Borgias. ‘Let me get you some more to drink.’ With a quick, forceful motion he took my hand and pulled me with him to the other side of the room.

  ‘Thank you,’ I said, recovering my breath after holding it for so long. ‘I thought I would never escape them.’

  ‘It’s nothing,’ Lowe glanced about him casually but his gaze came back to me. ‘But surely you know your own strength could have overwhelmed theirs … if the need had arisen?’

  ‘Yes, but … I was off guard,’ I improvised, flustered. ‘And they are quite overwhelming.’

  ‘Interesting.’ He whipped a glass of what looked like water from a small serving girl on her way to another group of guests. ‘You are either very naïve, or you have good reason to fear the Borgias …’ He paused, his stare intensifying. ‘Which is it?’

  I shook my head as though I hadn’t understood him. Inside I realised that Lowe’s scrutiny was more alarming than the Borgias’.

  I turned as subtly as I could to look at the vampires, but they had vanished. I relaxed again.

  ‘You don’t have to stay with me,’ I told him. ‘I’m sure you have more interesting guests to talk to.’

  ‘Not at all,’ he said quietly. ‘None half as interesting as you.’

  To my relief, Luca appeared in the ballroom, looking around him, worried. Spotting Lowe and me, he hurried over to us.

  ‘I’m so sorry to leave you. But I see you have been rescued. He patted his brother on the arm. ‘Thank you, brother.’

  ‘You should really keep an eye on Jane,’ Lowe told him. ‘She is like a lamb to the slaughter in here.’

  Luca paled a little at that, but he kept his composure.

  ‘Fresh air, I think,’ he said turning to me. ‘It is getting stifling in her
e.’ He took off his jacket and hooked it over his arm.

  Lowe grinned, his sharp, white teeth fully exposed. ‘A room full of beasts,’ he mocked. ‘What do you expect?’

  Luca rolled his eyes at his brother and tugged at my hand. ‘There is a beautiful garden at the back of the palace. A good place to sit away from the noise.’ Brushing past a bemused-looking Lowe we walked towards a large door near the stained-glass window, past the orchestra, where Dalya sat yawning.

  The music faded a little as the door shut behind us. The hall we were in was a mass of gilt-framed paintings and spectacular marble tiles, polished to perfection. I could never resist a polished floor, and I found myself twirling, gliding around, picking up the hem of my dress like I hadn’t done since I was a little kid. I almost forgot Luca was with me until I stopped, feeling slightly dizzy, and saw him watching me with a grin.

  ‘Sorry,’ I said hiccuping. ‘I don’t usually act like this … I guess it’s having to be so proper all night. It makes me want to misbehave a little.’

  ‘I approve,’ he said, still smiling at me. ‘I hope I get the chance to see you misbehave more often.’

  ‘Do you now?’ I said, swirling my skirts from side to side. ‘Don’t let the precious angels hear you say that or they’ll throw us out.’

  ‘I wouldn’t mind that either,’ he said. ‘We could go and misbehave in private somewhere.’

  ‘Luca!’ I said in mock disapproval. ‘And you’ve been such a gentleman all night!’

  ‘I didn’t mean …’ he said, flushing. ‘I meant …’

  I grinned at his discomfort. ‘So, are we going to see this secret garden or not?’

  The door was unwieldy at first, but eventually Luca pulled it open and we slipped through and down a small carpeted corridor. All was quiet, but as we walked further down the corridor, we heard the sound of hushed voices coming from a large room at the end. It was dark inside. I glanced anxiously at Luca, who slowed his pace, putting his arm gently out to stop me.

  ‘Who’s there?’ called a familiar, purring voice.

  ‘Vanya,’ muttered Luca. ‘It is Luca,’ he called loudly.

  Vanya appeared in the doorway, her eyes narrowing. ‘Well, speak of the devil,’ she said. ‘Valdar and I were just deliberating over something …’ She paused, her gaze sweeping over me like a searchlight. ‘When is a wolf … not a wolf?’

  Luca’s benign expression was frozen on his face. ‘I don’t understand.’

  ‘Really?’ She stepped closer, much closer, to us and extended a finger to lift my chin with one glossy black nail. I stayed rooted where I was.

  ‘Vanya.’ Luca sighed, frowning at the gesture. ‘What are you up to?’

  ‘Oh, darling,’ she said theatrically. ‘We have a little … dilemma … on our hands.’

  My eyes slid uneasily to Luca, whose expression was impassive. Only the slight tick in his cheek gave him away.

  ‘You see the problem is,’ Vanya went on, ‘that this lovely creature just doesn’t smell right.’

  I swallowed. It hadn’t worked. The mint and bay leaf had not worked.

  ‘You’re drunk,’ Luca told her firmly. ‘And you’re imagining things.’

  ‘Don’t think so, old boy …’ Valdar stepped out from behind Vanya, like a giant shadow in the dark. ‘I’m not in the least bit drunk and I agree with Mother.’ He smiled at me, and there they were, sharp and filed, his teeth glinting in the dim light.

  Luca stepped calmly in front of me.

  ‘I suggest you go back to the party and forget all about this,’ he said, looking from Vanya to Valdar. ‘You know the consequences of biting and feeding on Nissilum. Is it really worth it?’

  ‘Oh sweet hell, yes,’ said Vanya, tilting back her head and laughing. ‘For that one momentary break in a lifetime of tedious good behaviour. For that one, sweet drop of mortal blood on my tongue.’ She shuddered, dropping her head.

  And just as I edged away from her, her hand shot out to grab my arm, twisting it, pulling me close.

  ‘Jane!’ Luca shot forward, pushing me back behind him quickly. As I tried to take in what was happening, I was aware of the heat coming from his body and the pulse in his cheek. He seemed to grow bigger and, as I watched, the cotton-silk of his shirt strained over his arm.

  ‘Careful wolf-boy,’ Vanya mocked, still clutching me to her. ‘I am swifter than you …’ But with a snap of his jaw, Luca’s mouth opened, all his teeth revealed, and he threw back his head and roared, fiercely and shockingly into her face.

  ‘Luca!’ I screamed, glimpsing Valdar’s alarmed face behind Vanya’s.

  Vanya meanwhile had shrunk back into her son, pushing them both as far from Luca as possible.

  I stepped back too as Luca growled, his shirt torn, and his arms covered in fine black hair. I didn’t dare examine his hands. I looked away and shut my eyes.

  ‘Well, go then,’ he growled at Vanya and Valdar. ‘Now!’

  With one briefly ruffled look at us both, Valdar dragged Vanya firmly back along the corridor, as she snarled and muttered under her breath.

  I stayed rooted in position, staring at Luca’s back, his shirt shredded, the muscles around his waist throbbing slightly. He didn’t turn. Instead he put his head in his hands, rolling his scalp around, making small groaning noises.

  ‘Luca.’ I cautiously put a hand out to touch his shoulder blade. ‘Are you OK?’

  There was a pause and then, still with his back to me, he began slowly shaking his head.

  ‘Damn it,’ he muttered. ‘I’m not OK.’

  I took my hand away, waiting, wondering whether I should go. Leave this place, and Nissilum, right away. But I still didn’t move. I couldn’t leave him. Not like this.

  Eventually, Luca lifted his head, and I saw his body had returned to normal. He turned slowly to face me, and though his eyes were darker green and a little bloodshot, he was Luca again.

  ‘I have done a foolish thing,’ he said darkly. ‘Bringing you here, to this place. It was selfish and naïve of me.’ He shook his head. ‘We must try and get you home. As quickly as possible.’

  ‘And where would that be?’ A cool voice spoke out of sight.

  Luca and I turned quickly to see Lowe, leaning casually up against the wall behind us, an insolent smile on his face. ‘Where is home?’

  Luca darted a look at me that said Keep quiet and let me do the talking. So I remained silent, making sure however to cast Lowe as resentful a look as possible.

  He didn’t appear to notice. This time he only had eyes for his brother.

  ‘I knew she wasn’t a wolf,’ he said coldly. ‘I knew it the moment I saw her. Felt her aura.’

  ‘And?’ said Luca boldly. ‘She is doing no harm.’

  ‘Not now she isn’t …’ Lowe began aggressively, but seeing Luca’s pained expression altered his tone to a more wheedling one. ‘I’m just concerned for you, brother. You know how this ends. We all know what really happened to Gabriel—’

  ‘I don’t care,’ said Luca, forcefully. ‘You know nothing of this girl. You know nothing of me.’

  Lowe was silent for a minute and finally his eyes turned to me.

  ‘So. You have seduced him. You weave your mortal magic and trap him into wanting you. But look at him! He has turned tonight … For you.’ He stepped right up to me, then, and with a voice dripping in derision, stuck his face into mine. ‘I’m telling you this. You will leave here tonight and you will never come back. I will not allow you to ruin him.’

  ‘There is nothing like that between us,’ Luca told him. ‘If you must know, I was sick and tired of Henora and Ulfred asking if I had a girlfriend. Jane is my friend and she agreed to … play the part for tonight.’

  I hugged myself. It was true, all of it. So why did I feel so … disappointed? Why did I feel kind of foolish? Let down.

  ‘Whatever you say,’ Lowe said airily. ‘She still doesn’t belong here.’

  ‘It was never my intention to hurt Luca.’ My
own voice cracked. ‘But I can see that I am trouble here.’

  ‘No, no, Jane,’ Luca said softly, placing his hand on my arm. I gripped his fingers, as though this was the last time I would touch him, not wanting to let him go.

  ‘Yes.’ I turned to face him fully, blocking Lowe’s view of him. ‘I didn’t mean to be, but it won’t work. Soon enough, everyone will know I am not a wolf. If Vanya doesn’t tell them, then he will.’ I gestured with my head behind me.

  I studied every inch of Luca’s face. His tender, green eyes, his finely-honed cheekbones and the dark fringe that fell forward now into his eyes. I wanted to remember this face forever.

  ‘Lowe, leave us, please,’ said Luca, firmly.

  ‘I’m not—’

  ‘I would like to say goodbye to Jane,’ persisted Luca. ‘Allow us that, at least.’

  There was a hesitation before Lowe spoke again.

  ‘Very well. You have four minutes to get rid of her.’ With that he turned and walked down the corridor. We watched until he shut the door at the end behind him.

  Luca turned to me. ‘I will come and see you,’ he said, quietly but feverishly. ‘It will be difficult, because Lowe will report this to Henora and Ulfred … I will be watched from now on. But I will do it.’ He held my face in one hand and drew me to him, resting his forehead against mine. I felt tears coming, and loneliness.

  Though I should have told him that this was the end, that it was better for all of us if he and I never laid eyes on each other again, I did not.

  My selfish heart wouldn’t let me.

  I got to see the peaceful garden at the back of the palace. Luca took me out there and we ran its length, his hand holding mine. When we reached the far side of it, a row of dark, leafy bushes parted in the middle to reveal a well-trodden but unplanned pathway. We crept quietly up to a high wrought-iron gate, which Luca opened, and we slipped through, out of the grounds.

  I looked back down the narrow path, across the acres of grass, at the back of the palace, which twinkled prettily – shadows moving behind the stained-glass window of the great hall.