The Bewitched Box Set

by W. J. May

  Jin crinkles his forehead. “Sweetness? Do you think I embody some sort of confection?”

  I smile. “It’s a term of endearment. We’re engaged, we have to play the part.”

  He gives me a wink. “Of course, Flitter Mouse.”

  “What the heck kind of endearment is that?”

  “It is from the Alchemist. ‘My fine Flitter-mouse, My Bird o’ the night.’”

  “Bird of the night? Oh crap. You mean a bat?”

  “Indeed. Bats are wondrous little creatures. Quite charming, do not you agree?”

  I wrinkle my nose. “Ah...no. People back in Victorian times sure had strange ideas.”

  He smiles. “Yes, we did. Now my precious Flitter Mouse, should we not be proper and retire to our respective bedchambers?”

  Jin helps me pull out the sofa bed. I pop down the hall and find a pillow and a blanket in the closet. I put them on the mattress. It’s all for show. Jin doesn't need to sleep. Wonder what he’s going to do all night? Maybe I better tie him up.

  He sits on the edge of the bed and a spring creaks loudly. “Not exactly the kind of accommodations I am used to, but it will have to suffice.”

  I give him a smirk. “Maybe I should hire a designer and give your vase a deluxe makeover.”

  ***

  I run the brush through my hair, throw on my robe, and head into the kitchen. Jin greets me with a smile. I can’t take my eyes off him. His hair is tousled like he actually slept last night. A curl sweeps over his forehead as he gazes into the bowl of cereal sitting in front of him. His shirt is slightly open exposing a ripped chest to match his back. Who knew Victorian genies liked to work out? Minus the bowler hat and monocle, he looks like a guy in a Calvin Klein commercial. I never really noticed before how truly handsome he is. No wonder the girls at Grover High were drooling. I’ve got one hot genie on my hands. Maybe pretending to be his fiancée isn’t such a bad thing after all.

  Dad points at the bowl of cereal in front of Jin. “You want something else?”

  If genies don’t sleep, I wonder if they ever get hungry? I give his hand a reassuring pat. “Try it. Coco Puffs, my favorite breakfast.”

  “What, pray tell, are they?”

  “It’s cereal. You know, like oatmeal. The best part is when they dissolve and the milk gets all chocolaty. Yum.”

  He crinkles his nose. “Is it customary to dine on something that looks like mud?”

  Dad laughs. “I’m with you.” He holds up his tall glass. “You want to try some of my protein drink?”

  Jin picks up his spoon. “I will partake of my Flitter Mouse’s favorite.”

  Dad almost drops his glass. “Flitter Mouse?”

  He’s never going to let me live this one down. “Yeah, isn’t it cute? He’s my sweetness.”

  Dad rolls his eyes. “To steal a phrase from the kids, I think I’m going to hurl.”

  Jin puts down his spoon. “Sir, if you don’t mind me pointing it out, I have heard you call women ‘Kitten’.”

  Dad nods. “Point taken.”

  I shovel in a few spoonfuls of Coco Puffs and Jin follows my lead. He’s tentative at first. When I look at the bowl again it’s almost empty. Guess that answers my question about genies ever being hungry.

  Jin smiles. “This cereal is quite savory. Although I think it is a trifle too sweet for my taste.”

  Dad downs the rest of his drink and turns to Jin. “So tell me, where are you from in London? I’ve been there before, I might know the place.”

  “I lived in Kensington-Upon-Thames.”

  “Impressive. That’s where all the super rich live. Are your parents wealthy?”

  Great. Dad has moved from chitchat to interrogation.

  “Yes. We had a charming residence in Hans Crescent.”

  Dad’s brow furrows. “Had?

  “An unfortunate family tragedy forced the residence to be put up for sale.”

  “Did something happen to your parents? Are they dead?”

  Jin hangs his head. “Yes, regrettably. They parted this world in a tragic incident.”

  “What happened?”

  “Dad, what is this, the Spanish inquisition?”

  “Esme, ‘tis all right.” Jin gives my hand a squeeze. “Your father has a right to know about the man who is going to marry his daughter. With my person safely tucked away in boarding school, my mother and father took a sojourn to Asia. They were quite the adventurous sort. In Thailand they rode elephants through the wilds to an ancient temple. My mother and father were ambushed by robbers and killed. They passed away without a will and testament. I was left with nothing. With no other relation to come to my aid, I was expelled from boarding school. I had to seek work to survive. I worked until I earned enough funds to travel to America. To begin a new life.”

  My dad sits speechless. Maybe he’s trying to figure out of it’s BS or the truth.

  I couldn’t help wonder myself. Yet, there was something in the tone of Jin’s voice that made me think some of his story was true. Do genies have parents? Could the couple he was talking about have been his previous owners? The ones before the magician? I never really thought about what kind of life Jin had with the owners who came before me. From what little Jin said about the magician, he had to have been the worst. To banish him to the vase for eternity was beyond harsh. I wonder what Jin did to make him so mad?

  A look of concern crosses Jin’s face. “Esme, are you feeling unwell? Your face has grown pale.”

  “Sorry. You never told me what happened to your parents before. So sad.”

  My dad nods. “It must have been a very hard time for you, Jin.”

  “It is in the past, sir.”

  Time to lighten things up pronto. “Dad, I bet I know what your next question is going to be. How did we meet? Grandma introduced us at one of her neighborhood social events.”

  Jin nods. “Indeed. I was escorting an acquaintance.”

  “Jin and I were the youngest people there. The average age must have been at least eighty. So of course we got to talking.”

  Dad grins. “And the rest is history?”

  “Yes. Now can we drop the twenty questions? It’s almost time for school.” I put my hand on Jin’s shoulder. “You‘ll be okay here. Right?”

  Dad pushes back from the table. “I’m sorry, but he can’t just hang around the house all day.”

  It’s like he knew who set the house on fire. “But, Dad—what’s he supposed to do? He doesn’t know his way around town. Plus, he has a problem understanding Americans.”

  “I feel bad for what has happened to him but he needs to get a job. He needs to prove to me that he is serious about marrying you. He needs to earn a paycheck.”

  Jin cuts in before I can say anything. “Sir, I would be content to reside in the library while you and Esme are at school. I take great pleasure in learning.”

  “Yes. That’s a great idea, Jin.”

  Dad shakes his head. “I can’t have him loitering in the library. What will people say? No, he needs to work. What did you do for work back in London, Jin?”

  I bite my lip worried he might blow it.

  “I was employed by my Master.”

  Dad’s face goes blank. “Master? Of what?”

  Crap. “He means a magician. Right, Jin?”

  “Of course. Roderick the Magnificent was one of the most famous magicians of his time.”

  “Really?” Dad points to his waist. “You mean like the trick of sawing someone in half?”

  Jin nods. “Yes, and many other wondrous illusions. His most famous trick was to step through a large mirror and come out the other side unscathed.”

  “Well, we don’t have jobs that exotic here.” He pulls at the fringe of the placemat deep in thought. “I’ve got it!”

  Dad pulls out his cell and quickly punches in a number. He walks into the kitchen so we can’t hear his conversation. I grab Jin’s arm. “What are we going to do? I still don’t know my dad that well, but he see
ms like the type that’s not going to drop the subject.”

  He nods. “Indeed. I would surmise your father is quite persistent when it comes to my being employed. Perhaps I should do as he pleases.”

  “Are you kidding? Who knows what kind of trouble you could get in?”

  He stares deep into my eyes. “Mistress, there is one solution.”

  “No. I’m not going to wish my dad away.”

  “Nothing so calamitous, Mistress. You could wish that your father accepts me like a member of the family.”

  I give Jin a crooked smile. “Aren’t you breaking rule number four?”

  “Certainly not. T’was merely a suggestion.”

  I know Jin has been in the wishing game a long time, but his solution just seems lame. “I swore to myself I’d only use my wishes for something big. Life and death big.”

  Jin shakes his head. “You have six left. You can spare one for... me.”

  Strange. Is Jin actually scared to work? Being a genie is kind of a job. Maybe doing something else really does frighten him.

  “Don’t worry, I’ll think of something.”

  Dad bounces back into the room looking very pleased with himself. “Problem solved! I’m friends with the owner of Weenie World. Jin starts tomorrow.”

  * * *

  Chapter Seven

  Weenie World & Other Torture

  “Dad!” OMG he’s got to be joking. I so can’t see Jin wearing a Weenie World uniform with the hot dog shaped hat. He’d die.

  Jin’s face goes blank. “What, pray tell, is a Weenie World? What kind of occupation would I be executing in a world that is so miniscule?”

  “Dad, would you like to explain it to both of us?”

  He sighs. “Jin fooling around is bad enough. Not you too.”

  “I’m not. Go ahead explain what he’ll be doing there.”

  “Why, cooking hot dogs, of course.”

  Jin’s brow furrows. “Hot dogs? Why would anyone want to cook up a loyal domesticated animal?”

  I watch as Dad’s face looks like it might explode. Nice to see someone else suffer from Jin’s lack of modern slang for a change. He looks me in the eye. “Does he always talk like this? If he’s kidding around, I don’t think it’s funny.”

  “No, Dad. He really doesn't understand what one is. He doesn’t know much about American food.”

  Dad looks more confused than ever. “But I thought hot dogs were available in England?”

  I can so relate to his frustration. “He was in that old fashioned boarding school, remember?”

  Jin nods. “Yes, sir. I was extremely sheltered. We were served only the most traditional of British cuisine. What precisely is a hot dog?”

  The teacher side of my Dad comes out. “It’s like a sausage and it’s served in a special shaped bun. People usually put catsup and mustard on top. They’re actually quite delicious.”

  I scrunch up my face. “That’s a matter of opinion. I’ll take a hamburger any day.”

  “Esme, what is a hamburger?”

  OMG not again. “It’s ground beef served on a round bun.”

  Dad looks as tired of the word game as I am. “Jin, you just need to know about hot dogs. That’s the only thing they serve at Weenie World. Oh, and French fries and onion rings.”

  Jin leans forward ready to ask for more food clarification, but I cut him off. “Dad, I’m concerned about Jin working in fast food. It’s really not a good fit for him.”

  Dad looks at his watch. “No use fighting with me. It’s all set up. We drop him off in fifteen minutes.”

  Crap. Why does he have to be such a hardnose? I run to my bedroom and throw on another nondescript outfit. I corner Jin in the den. “Look, try not to get into trouble. Just follow the instructions they give you. Okay?”

  He nods. “I am up for the challenge, Mistress. I will not disappoint you.”

  “Whatever you do, don’t say anything about being a genie and that I’m your Mistress.”

  He nods. “Understood.”

  We race along the streets to get to Weenie World on time. I cross my fingers as I watch Jin get out of the car and follow Dad through the front door. Maybe they will just stick him with scrubbing floors all day. He can’t mess that up, can he?

  Dad walks steadily toward the car and hops in. “Everything is all set. My friend is excited to have someone from England working at his place.”

  Maybe it’s because he knows Jin will attract a whole new set of customers—girls.

  ***

  I fidget in my seat listening to the literature teacher drone on and on about our reading list. “What an exciting semester we’re going to have reading Macbeth, Canterbury Tales, Beowulf, Hamlet, Wuthering Heights, Heart of Darkness, Crime & Punishment, and Dorian Grey. Just think of all the wonderful word use we are going to explore!”

  My eyes glaze over, just like in my botany class. Why are some AP classes such a drag? Aren’t the classes supposed to simulate our minds and get us hyped for college? Or is it just me? Ever since Grandma died I seem to have lost my enthusiasm for school. It takes all my energy just to keep out of trouble. Plus all I can think about is Jin. I’m never going to have time to read half the list with him around. My neck muscles tighten when I think of the kind of trouble he can get into at Weenie World. Somehow I have a feeling my dad is going to regret getting his friend involved. Not to mention the fact that Jin doesn't have a green card. Strange how Dad forgot that little detail.

  The lunch bell rings and I have a stroke of genius. Instead of going to the cafeteria I head for the bus stop instead. I can grab a hot dog and check up on Jin at the same time. The bus pulls up and I barely have an hour to get to Weenie World and back. When the bus pulls up to the giant hot dog sign, I fly out the door. I try to act cool as I stroll into the restaurant. Maybe Jin won’t appreciate me spying on him. At first I don’t see his face. Then I hear his distinctive voice coming from behind the counter. “Why certainly, Scott. I will attend to the tables immediately.”

  Jin is wearing the signature hot dog hat, yellow pants, and the bright yellow T-shirt with a giant wiener on the front. Somehow the tacky uniform makes Jin look even more handsome. Even in hot dog hat, he screams class. Jin seems oblivious to the way he looks as he opens the side door and walks toward the umbrella tables. I pop out the front door to surprise him. He’s trying to figure out how to open one of the umbrellas when I come up behind him and grab his hat. “Hey, Jin, looking good.”

  His face is pale. “Mistress, you gave me a fright.”

  “Hey, I told you never to call me that in public.”

  “I do not find your prank amusing, Esme.”

  I plop down on the bench. “Sorry. I just wanted to see how you’re doing.”

  “Actually, quite well. Your father’s acquaintance, Frank, has been frightfully kind. He has given me only simple tasks to complete on my first day. This morning I filled sugar containers, loaded all the straw dispensers and made certain all the napkin holders were at capacity.” He holds out the bright yellow shirt. “As you can see, I’ve managed to stay quite tidy.”

  I’m beginning to think my genie is a neat freak. “Yeah, nice job.”

  A pretty girl with highlighted brown hair and super short yellow shorts walks up to Jin. Definitely not a regulation uniform. She must have cut off the legs of a pair of pants. Her yellow T-shirt is at least two sizes too small. “Frank sent me over to help you with the umbrellas.” She bends over the table and grabs ahold of the handle, making sure her butt is practically in his face. “See, Jin, you open them like this.”

  I want to barf. She is taking flirting to a whole new level. Just love how she acts like I’m not even there. I tug on Jin’s pant leg. “Sweetness, can you get me a Weenie supreme? I’m starving.”

  The girl turns to Jin. “Who’s this?”

  “She’s my fiancée, Esme.”

  The girl sticks out her lower lip. “You’re not single?”

  I get right up in her fa
ce. “No, he’s not. Now jet.”

  She throws her hair back and saunters back to the restaurant. A grin spreads across Jin’s face. He’s enjoying being fought over. “Jill was only doing as she was instructed.”

  “Oh really? Did Frank tell her to stick her butt in your face?”

  ***

  Figures the bus back to campus was running late. I had to jog to get to class on time. I’m still huffing and puffing as the lit teacher goes over the course outline. A tiny bit of pickle relish drips off my chin. Nothing like trying to eat a hot dog with all the toppings while riding on a bumpy city bus. I reach into my backpack to get some napkins when I hear my phone chirp.

  The teacher gives me the evil eye. “All cell phones off. Please.”

  I go to silence the ringer when I see it’s a text from Dad. “Get in my office now!”

  Oh crap! It has to be something serious for him to text me in class. I leap up from my chair. “I’m sorry, Ms. Templeton, but I’ve been called to the principal’s office.” I hear a few snickers from the kids who know he’s my dad.

  “This is highly unusual. Let me see the text.”

  I throw the backpack over my shoulder, march up to her desk, and show her the message. She scans it twice and then nods. “Excused.”

  I race to the administration building. By the time I hit dad’s office I’m panting. I barge through the door to find dad staring at the TV. “Can you believe this? I’m waiting for Frank to call me back to tell me what’s going on.”

  On the TV is a reporter standing in front of Weenie World. There is smoke pouring out of the back of the restaurant. “O.M.G! The place is on fire. Not again!”

  Dad looks confused. “What do you mean again?”

  Me and my big mouth. “Ah...nothing. We better get over there. Jin might be hurt.”

  Dad grabs his jacket. “I sure hope not.”

  I’m biting my nails the whole way to the restaurant. How could things have gone so wrong in the twenty minutes it took me to get to school? I stop mid-bite. Maybe it’s not Jin’s fault. My momentary ray of hope fades when we pull into the parking lot and I see Jin’s face and hands blackened by smoke. His once pristine yellow shirt is now a dingy grey covered in black splotches. A paramedic is talking to him. Before Dad completely stops the car, I bolt out of the door and head straight for Jin. “Are you all right?”