by Lola James
“You make me feel so safe,” I mumbled, as my head rested on his chest.
“Oh shit, that reminds me.” Dawn’s voice broke our moment and I glanced over my shoulder as she palmed her forehead. “That Psycho-Bitch Persephone is free, but she can’t harm or kill you.”
“What?” The pitch in my voice was higher than I expected. I dropped my arms from around Ben and faced Dawn.
“Yes, I meant to tell you that last night, but then Amy showed up and you left; but yes, and I wouldn’t put it past her crazy ass to try.” Dawn shifted from foot to foot like a nervous tick.
“I don’t understand why she didn’t go to jail or something.” I shook my head at the thought that Hades’ wife could still antagonize me, but not kill me. My life sucks right now. My childhood friend hates me because I don’t love him, I love a Greek god that is married to a woman who wants me dead, and then there’s Ben. He’s the only part of my life that isn’t bad. Maybe I don’t need to make a choice. The decision might have already been made for me, Ben. I looked over my shoulder. Ben will keep me safe. I saw concern wash over Ben’s handsome face as a small smile made its way to his lips.
If I choose Hades, that will be all kinds of fuckedupness. I shake my head to clear the thought.
“Politics of the gods is worse than our politics.” Dawn sounded disgruntled. I turned back to look at her blue eyes sparkling.
“You’re one of them, now.” I reasoned.
“Hardly, they have this hierarchy and I am considered a demi-goddess, which basically means an awesome mortal.” She paced the floor and Ben moved in front of me gripping my shoulders.
“Toni, I will do anything to protect you. You’ve got to believe me. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you; so if that means I have to fight off a Cyclopes every day until forever, I will.” His words touched the edges of my heart and reinforced the love I had for him. Our love was without conditions and unspoken. I didn’t have to tell him a thousand times a day that I loved him for him to know that it was true and vice versa. There was a connection between us from the beginning; and even if I didn’t choose him, I would never stop loving him. The more I think about this, the harder it becomes. No decision will be right because my heart will always ache for the other.
“Before y’all have another Notebook moment, we have patients to save and lives to change,” announced Dawn. We can deal with ways to protect Toni, later. The gods aren’t allowed on earth, so I don’t think we have anything to worry about, tonight.” Dawn always knew how to lighten the mood. But I needed to know more about what happened when she was with the gods.
“Wait, can you use magic to save people?” I inquired.
“Nope, Zeus forbids it, actually.”
“Then what’s the use?” I shook my head and we started toward the door.
***
Everyone seemed to fall back into the swing of things. I did as Ben suggested and the mask helped me. We didn’t have many victims bleeding and I was able to control my thirst pretty well. Dawn was amazed and Ben was proud. I saw the two of them talking from across the nurses’ station while I charted some notes. My mind was clear, which was exactly what I wanted. I took my break walking around the empty halls of the hospital. I had been focusing on the decision so much I hadn’t thought about my life now. I was a doctor before and now I’m a vampire, can the two blend? Ben had done it but he had over one hundred years of practice. I can’t be a novice vampire doctor. Can I?
When I made it back down to the emergency room, Dawn smiled at me like the cat that swallowed the canary.
“What did you do?” I asked, narrowing my eyes on her.
“Nothing.” She sipped a cup of coffee and magically the words “Team Ben” appeared on the side of the cup. I rolled my eyes and made my way to the nurse’s station when the accident victims rolled through the doors.
I grabbed at my mask and tried to pace myself from running toward the blood. All I saw was red.
It was everywhere and Ben saw the look in my eyes.
He pulled me aside and my nails bit into his scrubs.
“You should probably go home early. No one will miss you. Remember, you are still new at this.” His words were firm and what he was saying was true.
“Slaton, we need you.” A voice rang out.
My head was foggy and the thumping of the bleeding victims’ hearts sounded like a melody in my ears.
My fangs elongated and Ben pulled the mask up to hide them.
“Go, we will be fine. They need me,” he said, turning my body in the direction of the locker room. Dawn appeared at my side and slung her shoulder over mine.
“Ben’s right,” Dawn stuttered. She pulled me away from the scene and into the changing room.
“It’s fine. I’m fine.” I lied.
“No, you’re not. Just go home and take a bubble bath and Ben will be there shortly.”
I nodded, knowing that I should go. What was I thinking? A vampire and hospital don’t mix. I must be crazy.
“Seriously, T, it would be better.” Dawn looked as if she would cry if I protested and her southern accent peaked out, letting me know her sincerity.
“Fine.” I was defeated. I made my way to my locker. “I’m going you don’t have to monitor me. Go help save those people.” I frowned because I wanted to help, but I was more of a liability than support.
Dawn about faced and ran out back to the scene.
I pulled on my jeans and grabbed my jacket and helmet before strolling out of the locker room.
I didn’t want to go back to Ben’s place, but I had no choice. I wanted to go somewhere that I could think and be alone with my pity party for one. I could have asked Dawn for her keys, but I wasn’t sure if her sister, Amy, was still there and I doubted she wanted me around her, anyway.
I put my helmet on as I walked up to my bike and pulled on my jacket. I didn’t need the jacket, but I liked keeping up appearances.
I didn’t own very many possessions in this world, but the ones I did, I loved; and that included my little Honda motorcycle. I swung my leg over the bike and revved the engine.
I looked around the parking garage feeling that someone was watching me or it could have been my nerves, since Dawn told me that Persephone was free. I shook off the thought and took off.
The difference between then and now was my speed. I was fearless now, and my need for speed increased by becoming a vampire. My usual eight-minute drive home turned to three. I had no regard for laws and I knew I couldn’t die, hell I was already dead.
I opened the garage door with the clicker Ben had given me, since we were roommates, now. I rode my bike in and parked it sideways, hopped off, took off my helmet and shook out my hair before I placed my helmet on the seat.
I made my way to the door, closed the garage and strolled into the kitchen. I dropped the jacket from my shoulder, placing it on the back of a chair.
My thirst burned in my throat. Why hadn’t I ever seen Ben struggle with this? He was so cool and calm around all the bloody patients.
I chose a glass instead of a mug and poured a tall glass of blood. I locked the doors, but if a psycho bitch like Persephone wanted to kill me, a door wouldn’t stop her. I turned off the lights and headed to the white room to lie down and think before I rested for the day. I planned to be asleep or at least appear to be asleep before Ben came in. I was really trying not to have sex with him or Hades, until I picked one of them to be with. I refused to be that girl.
I set the glass on the nightstand next to the journal Ben gave me, and contemplated reading it. I kicked off my Nike’s, pulled off my jeans and plopped down on the unmade bed. I never made my bed when I knew I was getting back in it soon. I put the glass up to my lips to quench the thirst, created by those accidents victims, when grey smoke began filling the room. That only meant one thing. Hades was coming.
Eight
Antonia
I couldn’t lie to myself. I was excited to see him; but
I hoped he wouldn’t press me for an answer, because I wasn’t giving him one yet.
His hazel eyes came into focus before his Grecian nose, flawless skin and handsome face. The gorgeous Greek god stood before me with his ready-to-kiss lips and a smile appearing on his face.
“My Antonia.” His melodic baritone voice was like music to my ears. My thirst obliterated at the sound and I just wanted more.
He stood there, taking me in, and I looked down at my bare legs. I hoped he didn’t take that as an invitation. I pulled the cover up to my hips.
“Hades, what are you doing here? Ben will be here shortly.” Not that I minded.
“Benjamin will be delayed, but I didn’t come to talk about the vampire. I came to see how you are, my sweet.” He gestured to sit down on the edge of the bed. I nodded and his gaze warmed me. Ben may have had the touch, but Hades had the look. He made me feel like I was the single most important person in the world, with just a stare.
“What did you do to delay Ben?” I hoped he hadn’t hurt Ben.
“Just paperwork.” He shrugged it off and I eyed him suspiciously. “Now, tell me how you are in these conditions?” He looked around the room.
“It’s not bad at all, but it’s the roommate that I am still adjusting to. It’s hard to have time to myself to think, you know?”
“I don’t; but I could imagine. You wanted to go to your own place, but you couldn’t for some reason, my sweet.” He extended his hand for mine.
I slowly placed my hand in his.
“I’ve missed you already. I don’t know how I survived without you so long.” His warm lips kissed the top of it. If my cheeks could blush, they’d be the darkest shade of red.
I had to clear my throat and shake my head from the swoon-worthy trance Hades had me in. “I’d like to have my place back, but Ben compelled my landlord to get me out of it.” His lips trailed to my finger and fingertips making my unreal heartbeat faster.
“My Antonia, I want nothing more than to fulfill every desire in your heart. It’s such a beautiful heart. I know that you love me, and that you will make your decision when you are ready. I can wait. I’ve waited this long for you and I’d continue to wait an eternity to be with you.”
Imaginary butterflies fluttered in my stomach and I felt my heart slipping into his hands. I knew his words were true, he would wait.
“Hades, I don’t know what to say.” I was speechless. I tried to formulate the words, “thank you”, but my heart was in my throat, preventing anything from coming out. I decided to lean forward and kiss his lips. His hands found their way to my hips and he pulled me close to him.
The heat from his body made me feel like I would catch on fire. His tongue tickled mine and his lips sucked mine.
I grabbed the collar of his gown and he pulled back.
"I wish I could find the words to tell you how I felt the day we met, but I can't. I had given up on love and anyone ever loving me. But the moment I laid eyes on you, I knew you were put on the Earth for me and that you'd be all that I would ever need. There's nothing that compares to the way you make me feel. You're the beat in my heart and you've touched every part of me. You take my breath away, and losing you would be like—" he shook his head at the thought. "I can't even think of living without you. Just to hear you say you love me makes my life complete. These are just words, I know; but if you will let me prove myself to you, I will—every day from now until an eternity." I placed my finger over his lips to shush him before he took my hand in his.
"I know you will." His words were a sensual bliss to hear and to my heart. Everything he said, or couldn't say, made me feel his love. Tears sprang from my eyes as my decision just became harder. The beauty of his words made me happy. He loved me deeply and I understood that. We sat in silence wrapped in each other, taking in the moment. My toes tingled with excitement and I know that there was a silly grin planted on my face. I could stay in his arms, forever.
He came to make me feel what his heart wanted to say. We had a connection with energy that flowed between us and it spoke volumes, without words.
“My sweet, sweet Antonia.” He put a piece of my hair behind my ear. “I came to give you what you desire the most.”
“What do you mean?” I felt a key drop into my hand.
“I was able to arrange for you to get your apartment back.” He explained before his lips touched my forehead.
I opened my hand to find a shiny bronze key sitting in my hand. “But how?” My mouth fell open as my eyes bulged in utter shock. I fell back onto the headboard of the bed staring at the key. “You--”
“I’ve told you, I came to give you what you desire the most.” I didn’t think that it was possible; but it was true, Hades had given me what I desired most.
“Thank you.” Finally finding my words, I moved toward him wrapping my arms around his neck, pulling him close to me. I buried my face in his chest as his warm hand slid down the center of my back. I took in his scent and his love that made me like the naive girl he met and fell in love with.
“My sweet, I must go.” He continued to cradle me in his arms like he couldn’t believe his own words. “I’ve been summoned to Olympus.” His words seemed bittersweet and broke my heart a little.
I pulled back and looked at him. “Olympus?” I said more as a question and he just nodded. The thought of him in what I could only imagine as a palace in the sky, was interesting. “Did you just come here for me or for something else?” I asked. I wondered if he was the one I felt watching me, waiting for the moment I was alone, to talk to me.
“You are the only reason that I would break the laws of the gods. To see your smile, taste your lips, and hold you in my arms, I’d take any punishment Zeus could think of.” He held my chin up with his finger before touching my lips to his.
The thought of him being punished for me sadden me. He should never feel pain for doing something lovers would do.
“There is an important matter to discuss.” My only thought was that it had something to do with Persephone; but even her evil ass couldn’t kill my mood. I was resting on cloud nine with Hades.
“I am truly grateful for my apartment.” I held my gaze with him. Love bought him into my life and love keeps bringing him back.
It hit me that I had not weighed the value of having my own place back. Hades stood and gray smoke began to rise from under his feet.
“I know that you are. Sleep well my sweet Antonia, the sun will rise soon.” He kissed my fingertips, again.
“I love you,” I whispered with a toothy grin on my face.
“My heart belongs to you and your smile is my reward for your happiness.” His words lingered even after he disappeared, replaying in my head like the best broken record I had heard.
My heart swelled. Damn, I love him and he loves me. He came just to see me and gave me back my life or at least the last one I knew.
I didn’t hesitate to get going once he was gone. I hopped up and pulled my jeans on, stepped into my shoes, and grabbed a messenger bag. My mind was scrambled with thoughts of Hades and how he was able to give me back my apartment. I wondered what it looked like now. Was it furnished or empty?
I marched down the hall to Ben’s bedroom. I looked at the bathroom, with a flash of the memory of last night, with Ben, playing in my head. I shook the thought. I am tortured to have these seesaw thoughts plaguing my mind.
I made my way to the closet door and scanned it before I grabbing a few of my things and some underwear. I didn’t know what to expect at my apartment, so I grabbed a blanket and started on my way out. I stopped in my bedroom and gulped down the glass of blood I had fixed for myself and picked up Ben’s journal. I wanted to read about his life, after he turned, and maybe know a little more about the man I possibly could choose to spend forever with.
I was down the stairs and in the garage in seconds. My mind raced with thoughts of my next feeding, but knew that only a carafe with half a cup remained. I’d figure the blood out later
.
I made it to my bike, stuffing the blanket in the bag and strapped my bag around. Tossing my hair back, I pulled the helmet on and started the engine. Hades said the sun would be rising soon, so I needed to hurry.
I clicked the garage opener and turned around as the door opened.
I pulled outside and pressed my clicker before I was off. I drifted in the streets as the cool fog hit the shield on my motorcycle helmet.
From what I remembered, I had left my furniture and took only my clothes and essentials. The landlord probably had my few items moved out or given to Goodwill.
I was on the apartment-lined street that my building was on in no time. The pale pink building was home. I stopped in the driveway of the gate when parking garage magically opened. I wondered if Hades had this orchestrated for me. I sped in and pulled into my former spot, before killing the engine.
I hopped off my bike and pulled my helmet to the top of my head, not fully taking it off. I grabbed my things and started toward the elevator.
It was surreal to be back on the elevator I’d known for the last four years. The doors dinged when I arrived at my floor and then opened to the hallway. I walked up to my door. My neighbors hanging plant was in bloom. I could smell the Red Ivy from where I stood. I pulled the key from my pocket, stuck it in the lock and it opened the door. It creaked open, slowly, and my mouth flew open with surprise. My tiny one room studio apartment was the exact way I left it. All the furniture, which consisted of my bed, a tall dresser, and a chair that separated the “bedroom” from the kitchen, were all still intact. The only thing that was missing were the accents and knick-knacks that made a house a home.
The dust outline from where my degrees hung on the wall, the bare cabinets, where I once had food , an alumni mug and a few packets of fast food ketchup were evidence that I had once lived here.
I walked around the tiny studio, familiarizing myself with it, again. It felt like ages since I had been here. I dropped the bag, locked the door, walked over to the bed and flopped forward.