Masked Indulgence

by Michelle Love

  Charlie half-smiled. ‘Don’t do that…just, breathe deep and I’ll tell you. Promise?’

  She nodded, never taking her eyes from him. Charlie blew out his cheeks.

  ‘Okay…Lila, sweetheart, Richard isn’t here because he’s not allowed to come. He can’t come. He’s in jail.

  Her eyes nearly boggled out of her head. Why? Does he know who tried to kill me? Did he go after them?

  Charlie shook his head slowly and met her gaze. For a second they just stared at each other then he saw realization dawn on her face. She shook her head.

  No. No. I won’t believe it.

  Charlie took her hand again, but she shook him away.

  Say it, Charlie. Say the words out loud or I won’t believe it.

  Charlie reached over to cup her cheek. ‘I’m so sorry, baby…Richard has been arraigned. He’s been charged with soliciting your murder. Honey…Richard was the one who tried to have you killed…’

  Lila’s breath was coming in short gasps, and she was trembling violently and even with the tube in her throat, the scream that came from the very core of her was a keening, howling sound of unutterable grief.

  Charlie would never forget it.

  Then…Diner, East Village, Manhattan

  ‘I cannot believe you’re a grown man, and you still like PB&J. Are you five? And with French fries and pickle? So gross.’ Lila grinned at Richard as they sat in the midnight diner. Richard laughed.

  ‘Hey, don’t knock it until you’ve tried it. You must have a weird food thing, everyone does,’ he waved a French fry in front of her until she snapped at it, clenching it between her teeth and he chuckled.

  ‘Oh, okay, let me think…while stealing more of your French fries…’ Lila shoved another one in her mouth and chewed. ‘Okay…how about pretzels dipped in Nutella?’

  ‘That’s not weird. Come on, you’re not even trying…’

  ‘Pineapple on pizza.’

  ‘That’s gross but pretty mainstream. Ante up, Tierney.’

  She grinned at him. This was their third date since he had gotten out of the hospital and she had to admit, every single one of them had been fun, playful teasing and getting to know each other. Tonight, he’d come to meet her after work, surprising her but she had felt such joy when she saw his boyish grin, that she forgot all her rules about not mixing work and pleasure and introduced him to her friends there. Tinsley, the new girl from Australia, had nudged her when Richard was talking to Mikey.

  ‘Girl, you get on that as soon as you can.’

  Lila had flushed. Although she hated to admit it, she couldn’t think of anything but his hands on her when they were together. So far, he’d kissed her cheek, brushed her lips lightly with his but hadn’t tried anything and God, she wanted him. She looked at him now in his t-shirt and blue jeans and wondered what it would be like to slide her hands under that shirt and…

  ‘Lila?’

  She shook herself and grinned ruefully. ‘Sorry, miles away. Um…I really can’t think of anything.

  Richard - Rich, he said, Richard is my father – shook his head, disappointed. ‘You failed me.’

  ‘I’m sorry.’

  ‘You’ll have to make it up to me.’ And there it was, the look he’d given her that first night, the one that could burn her clothes from her body, inflame the desire deep inside her. Lila couldn’t look away from those dark, dark eyes…

  ‘I can certainly try,’ she said in a quiet voice. Without looking away from her, Richard raised his hand. ‘Check, please,’ he said calmly.

  In his car, he took her hand but made no other move to touch her. Lila’s heart was beating out of her chest, her breath coming in ragged gasps. Even in the elevator, he didn’t touch her, prolonging the agony although she could see his erection pressing hard against the denim of his jeans. His eyes ranged slowly all over her body until, as the elevator, stopped, he met her gaze again. He held out his hand to her, and she took it, feeling the jolt as his skin touched hers.

  He led her into his penthouse, but she barely registered her surroundings. They moved straight to his bedroom and when she stepped into the room, he turned and took her in his arms, his mouth on hers. God, that kiss…she felt it in every cell of her body. His hands slid gently under her t-shirt, and she raised her arms so he could slide it from her, dropping it to the floor.

  As if the fabric hitting the floor was a starter gun, suddenly they were tearing each other’s clothes off, gasping, breathless in their desperation and when they fell onto the bed, naked, Lila knew this was right, this was what she wanted. She curled her legs around his waist as he kissed her, his cock hard against her thigh and Jesus, but she wanted him inside her, urged him to hurry. Richard groped in his nightstand for a condom, and she rolled it onto his quivering, hard cock as he smiled down at her.

  ‘So beautiful,’ he said and gathered her to him. His cock teased her sex sliding up and down in her slick crevice before at last, he thrust deep into her cunt. Lila gasped as he filled her, rocking against him, spreading her legs wider to accommodate his size. Richard’s pace quickened as he slammed into her harder and harder, his hands locked either side of her head, his eyes on hers. Lila arched her back, her belly touching his and he groaned. ‘God, yes...Lila…’

  Her fingernails dug into his back, clawing at him, wanting him deeper and deeper, his sac hard against her butt as his cock drilled into her. She bit down on his shoulder and heard him give a short laugh. ‘I’m going to rip you in half, little girl,’ he growled, and she came as he drove himself into her. Richard’s orgasm came in a rush then, shuddering and moaning, and they collapsed together, still connected. She loved the feel of his cock inside her, even as his erection faded and Richard made no move to pull away. He lay on top of her, smoothing the damp hair away from her face. ‘I never want to be anywhere but buried in your delicious cunt,’ he murmured, and she grinned, thrilled by his coarseness, her sex again beginning to swell around his cock. Her clit felt like it might explode when his fingers found it, and she moaned softly, and he began to rub and tease it. His lips were at her ear. ‘Sweet, sweet Lila, I’m going to fuck that sweetness out of you, keep you all to myself, take you in every way you’ve ever dreamed of.’ He moved down the bed and caught each of her nipples in his mouth, sucking and teasing then biting gently down on the nub, looking up at her with those soulful, wicked brown eyes of his. ‘I could eat you whole,’ he whispered and ran his tongue down her stomach until it dipped into the hollow of her navel. She shivered as he moved down and then his mouth was on her, his tongue lashing around the hyper-sensitive clit.

  Lila moaned as waves and waves of pleasure crashed over her as Richard went down on her, his fingers clamped onto her hips, his tongue lapping and driving her towards an unbelievable orgasm. No sooner had she come, crying his name, then he launched his diamond-hard cock back into her, and Lila thought she might lose her mind. Richard, above her, looked victorious, and he made her come over and over.

  Finally spent, they wrapped their arms around each other, studying the other’s face as they caught their breath. Richard rubbed his nose gently against hers, his dark eyes shining.

  ‘That was incredible,’ Lila was still breathless, her whole body on fire, every nerve-ending vibrating with pleasure.

  ‘You are incredible,’ Richard said, running his hand down the length of her body. ‘So sexy, so soft…Lila Tierney, you make my brain go to mush…’

  She grinned. ‘So, no change there then.’

  Richard laughed. ‘And you bust my balls…so to speak.’ They both laughed, and Lila sighed happily.

  ‘If only a beat down wasn’t the reason we met.’

  Richard kissed her gently. ‘Totally worth it.’

  Lila cupped his cheek in her palm. ‘You never did tell me what happened that night. Charlie told me you weren’t pressing charges.’

  Richard looked uncomfortable. ‘Do we have to talk about it now? It was a just a mugging. I’d rather it wasn’t made public,
is all.’

  Lila shrugged. ‘That’s fair, I was just wondering. Charlie’s been…’

  ‘Charlie’s been what?’ His response was snapped at her, and she rocked back.

  ‘Nothing.’

  Richard looked immediately contrite. ‘Sorry, baby, I didn’t mean to snap. It’s just that guy pushes my buttons.’

  ‘Who, Charlie?’ It was Lila’s turn to look uncomfortable. ‘He can be too serious, sometimes. It’s just his way; he doesn’t mean anything by it.’

  Richard looked at her, half-smiling. ‘He’s around you too much, and he’s just too darn tall plus he’s got that Neanderthal like machismo going on.’

  Lila chuckled. ‘He does come across like that, I’ll admit. You jealous?’

  Richard looked as if he was about to protest then grinned good-naturedly. ‘A little. I hate that you’re around him all the time.’

  ‘He’s my family,’ she said quietly, and he kissed.

  ‘I know. Ignore my pathetic male ego. Anyway, I really don’t want to talk about Charlie Sherman when you’re lying naked in my bed.’ He pulled her on top of him and kissed her. ‘How about we forget about everyone else and just do this all night?’

  She grinned down at him. ‘Now that, Mr. Carnegie, is a very good idea…’

  Now…

  Every time he closed his eyes, he relived that moment. The moment his knife plunged deep into Lila’s abdomen, her wide, shocked eyes, the slight catch of the fabric of her dress as the knife cleaved it then sank all the way into her soft belly. God, the feeling. He had stabbed her quickly, but he recalled every second, ripping the blade out then plunging it back into her body. And God, at that moment, she was more beautiful than ever.

  The first six blows then she passed out, and he lowered her to the floor, crouching to stab her again, her blood soaking the thin cotton, making it stick to her skin. He stabbed the knife into the deep hollow of her navel again and again as his cock stiffened, blood-lust in his veins. He finally stopped, breathless, and stood, not able to tear his eyes away from her. Her dark red blood was pooling around her, her breathing labored.

  I love you so much, he thought, so very much, my beautiful Lila… He gripped the knife and knelt to slide it between her ribs into her heart, to finish it, but then he stopped, froze.

  He heard the saleswoman’s voice and regretfully – and with a last look back at the dying woman on the floor, darted out of the fire exit door through which he had made his entrance. As he made his getaway, he heard the scream of the saleswoman as she found Lila’s body and smiled to himself.

  There was no way she would survive that attack. No way.

  Except now he knew – she had. Was lying in a hospital bed, alive. Which meant that once again, he would have to plan things carefully. It wouldn’t be so easy this time; she would be protected, cared for, on the look-out for danger. So, he would be careful, vigilant, organized.

  Because when he stabbed her the next time, he would make certain she was dead…

  Now…Lenox Hill Hospital

  Lila took the cup of ice chips the nurse held out and scarfed some down gratefully.

  ‘Pace yourself,’ the nurse chided. ‘Just because you’ve had that damn tube out doesn’t mean you’re not still very sick. Your temp’s up and the doc won’t be happy about that. You still in pain, hun?’

  Her mouth full of ice, Lila nodded. She wasn’t making it up either; the hated tube was out, but her whole torso felt like it was on fire. The doctor told her it was to be expected. ‘The knife shredded your intestines, Lila; it’s a miracle you haven’t had a major infection up to now. Plus your muscles, your damaged liver…it’s going to take time. It’s a marathon, not a sprint.’

  Worse than the belly pain, though, was the fact she could barely feel her legs. She could wiggle her toes, but the pins and needle would not abate, and more than once she had woken up screaming from the cramp.

  Lila tried to stay positive, but it was difficult. Worse now she knew the police thought Richard was involved. No way, she thought, there’s no way. As soon as the tube had come out, she wanted to ask for a telephone but knew they wouldn’t let her speak to him. Charlie would be furious. He and Richard had never seen eye-to-eye, but this was beyond a jealous spat. Delphine, in tears, had told her that Charlie had apologized to her for arresting Richard but the only lead they had was him and that Charlie told her he couldn’t tell her why. Apparently, Richard had gone with the police without protest, telling his mother in a dead voice. ‘I knew they were going to come for me, Mom. I didn’t do this, but I know why they think I did. Tell Lila I love her, please.’

  And Delphine kept her word, and Lila had squeezed the distressed woman’s hand, trying to comfort her the best she could. She wrote ‘I believe him, Delphine. No way was it, Richard.’

  Delphine had smiled at her through her tears. We all love you so much, Lila Belle,’ she used the nickname that she had given Lila almost as soon as she met her, ‘we all do but no-one more than Richard. You are his life.’

  I know. I know I am.. A small part of her spoke up. If Richard wants me dead, then maybe I should be…but she pushed that thought away. Stop wallowing in self-pity. Get better. Do what the doctors say. Go fight for Richard.

  But suddenly being dead didn’t seem the worst thing in the world. I will save you, Richard Carnegie, if it’s the last thing I do.

  There was a small tap on the door, and a small red-haired girl peeked around it. Lila felt herself relax and smile. ‘Cora, darling…’

  Richard’s youngest sister, Cora, slid into the room and over to her side. Her large green eyes were wide and wary. ‘Can I hug you?’ Her voice wavered.

  Lila reached out her arms, and Cora went into them. Lila hid a wince of pain as Cora hugged her tightly. ‘I’ve been so worried, L-Belle,’ the younger woman said finally, dragging a chair over to Lila’s side.

  ‘Don’t be scared, C-Belle,’ Lila grinned. Almost as soon as they had met, she and Cora had connected, a deep, binding connection almost as strong as her relationship with Richard. Cora – ‘Cora Belle’ to her Mom hence the nicknames – was nineteen now, a slim, petite redhead with a thousand watt smile and an adorable lisp when she talked. Fragile physically and mentally, she hero-worshipped Lila as her sister. Her two older half-sisters were neither warm nor loving – Delphine, the mother of them all, called her two eldest children ‘The Foundlings’ behind their backs. ‘I cannot fathom how two such cold creatures came from my womb,’ she would often say about Judith and Flora, ‘they must take after their father.’

  Delphine’s first husband had died three years after they were married, a sudden heart attack. ‘Brought on by sheer bile,’ Delphine would mutter, almost gleefully.

  Judith and Flora barely tolerated their younger siblings: Richard, another son Harry who lived in Australia, and then the surprise baby of the family, Cora, who had been born when Delphine was fifty.

  Cora and Lila had become like sisters almost straight away – Judith, and especially Flora couldn’t stand Lila, her artistic skills, her rebellious nature, her independence all at odds with their Victorian attitudes. On the few occasions she had met them – and caught them bullying Cora – she’d called them out to their faces, not standing on ceremony at all. She apologized afterward to Delphine, but Delphine had cackled wildly. ‘Don’t apologize, it was almost regal.’

  This, this was why she loved the Carnegies. Richard Carnegie Sr. was the most serene, calm, intelligent man she’d ever met and she, like his children, doted on him.

  ‘When I look at you and Richard,’ Lila told Delphine, ‘that’s what I want. A partnership, a great friendship as well as passion.’

  And she had that with Richard… used to have it, she amended with a pang. Lately…not so much. She smiled at Cora now.

  ‘You look good, birdie. How’s college?’

  Cora smiled. Like Lila, she was a passionate artist and was enrolled at the same art college as Lila. ‘Everyone asks after you,�
�� she said now, ‘they all send their love. I miss you, L-Belle, at home, we all do. I…’ She trailed off and looked away. Lila guessed what she was thinking.

  ‘I miss you too. And Richard…I miss him terribly. He didn’t do this, you know. He couldn’t, he wouldn’t. As soon as I get out of here, I’ll be making sure they know that.’

  Cora was chewing her lip. ‘Are you sure?’

  Lila squeezed her hand. ‘You bet,’ she smiled to try and alleviate the tension. ‘I’ll be Erin Brockovich until they let him out.’

  ‘No,’ Cora hesitated, and her lip wobbled, ‘…are you sure it wasn’t Richard who did this?’

  Lila stared at her in shock. Cora was Richard’s biggest fan; her adored infallible older brother. No…no, this wasn’t right.

  ‘Cora, you must never say that again, do you understand? To anyone! Of course, I’m sure…Richard would never do this to me, not ever – ‘

  ‘He was screwing somebody else.’

  It was like a wrecking ball to the chest hearing it said out loud, and Lila had to gasp for air. Tears poured from Cora’s face. ‘I’m so sorry, Lila, I couldn’t not tell you after all of this. I only found out a few days ago, and I haven’t been able to get it out of my head.’

  ‘He wouldn’t…’ You know he was, you know it, don’t deny it… Lila squeezed her eyes shut, felt a wave of dizziness, of nausea and pressed her hand to her chest. Another panic attack on its way…breathe…breathe...

  Cora stood and grabbed the call button, and instantly a nurse came through the door. Lila could hear her saying something and Cora saying ‘She can’t breathe…’ She heard a deeper voice…Charlie?

  I’m alright, I’m okay, she wanted to scream at them, but nothing would come out, and now her lungs were burning, but all she could think about was how she used to believe that Richard would never, ever cheat on her…

  …and how, now, she knew without a doubt that he had.