Straight from the Heart

by Breigh Forstner

  “So how come I’ve never really noticed you in school?” He asked me, sitting down in the wooden swing my grandfather had built for my parents before he died. I wanted to ask myself the same question. I’d seen him enough times from a far distance to assume that he was not my type.

  But that night changed my world, and I fell in love.

  “Everything okay?” I heard Luke ask me as I was still half in my daydream. I sat straight up from my bed and peeled the headphones off my ears, setting them down next to me.

  “Yeah everything’s fine, Luke, just trying to chill.” I told him, and he smiled.

  “I’m just checking. You just seemed a little out of it and I wanted to let you know we were stopping to get some food in a little bit, stock up on groceries for the bus.” Luke explained, and as silly as is sounded, I kind of liked the idea of grocery shopping. “And the rest of us wanted you to do it, since you’re a girl. And honestly girls just seem to be better at grocery shopping as bad as that makes me sound.”

  “Fine, I’ll do it. I was just getting used to wearing my pajamas during the day, that’s never happened before!” I admitted. I shooed him away so I could slip on a pair of jeans and throw on a bra underneath my tank top. I’d become so laid back around the guys that wearing a shirt with no bra had become a daily thing on the bus. It was OK as long as I didn’t step outside.

  We stopped at a grocery store in town where our next show was, and by the time the bus pulled into the parking lot, I had been handed a list a mile long. “Why do you want like 10 lbs. of sausage? We don’t have an oven or anything to cook so you have to keep it simple.” I scolded everyone as I glanced over the strange requests they were throwing at me.

  “It’d be a good investment sometime when we upgrade out of this fucker.” Cale joked as he patted my back. “You’re a woman. You should be good at this right?”

  I snickered. “Yeah right. I told you I grew up in a house where my parents paid people to deliver us our groceries remember? They didn’t dare step foot in a grocery store unless it was ‘gourmet,’”

  Cale followed me off the bus and into the store. “You sort of failed to mention that before, Miss ‘I grew up rich.’” He air quoted.

  “Well lead the way, Mr. Know-it-all. I may have had money at some point, but I walked away from it, remember?” I asked, grabbing a shopping cart and wiping it down.

  “You would be one of those wiping the carts down Miss Paranoid,” Cale teased, and I slapped his arm, taking the cart and going into the opposite direction as him. As I was piling things in and checking items off the list, I felt a pair of hands grab my shoulders, causing me to scream.

  I turned around and saw Cale. I wanted to slap him again the jerk. He was making things more difficult than it already was. I really felt sorry for whoever his lucky wife would be someday. I wondered if he was going to sit around and taunt the poor girl to death. But I had to admit, the pestering was kind of hot.

  “Jeez what the hell were you thinking? We’re going to get kicked out of here!” I shrieked, nearly slipping on the wet floor. Cale was about ready to fall on the floor from laughing so hard.

  “You’re wayyy too easy to scare, lady. I’ll change that soon, don’t you worry.” He put some more food in the cart. We scoured all of the aisles, paid a couple hundred bucks for everything, and that included a big bag of Dove chocolate, much to Cale’s disagreement, and left the store.

  The guys helped us stock everything up into what cupboard space we had left, and we took off for our next venue, which wasn’t that far.

  I’d learned that listening to 80’s music pumped me up the most before shows, and also calmed my nerves. Dr. Feelgood by Motley Crue was blaring from Cale’s iPod in our dressing room as he was pouring all of us shots. We had some of the members from The Nemesis partying with us. If I thought my guys were crazy, these people were pure incarnate. Only a couple of shots in and they were hammered. Raptor had to kick them out so they wouldn’t miss their set.

  “Shit, judging by the bags under their eyes, they’ll be playing like hell tonight.” Raptor snickered. He came over to sit by me, sandwiching me between him and Vince, who was trying to stay away from drinking tonight. Raptor offered me a shot and I reluctantly took it, hoping I wouldn’t fall over on stage from having one more. I’d only had about five.

  “We better get ready and like practice or something.” I tried to wiggle out of the man sandwich I was in, but the guys squished me even more as a joke. “You’re going to crush me!” I pushed and punched them and then to top it off, Cale and Luke decide to sit on top of us. Then I was really feeling suffocated.

  I could feel the breath leaving my lungs. Having a 170 pound man sitting on top of little old me would do that

  “Cale Pelton, get off of me before I grab my guitar and knock you in the head with it.

  I warned, knowing I wouldn’t actually hurt him, but the idea of it made me happy inside. He shook his head so his hair was whipping my face so I gave one final push and he landed on flat on his ass, sending the room into an uproar.

  “You’re going to regret that, B.” Cale huffed, insinuating he was challenging me. Challenge accepted.

  He made it apparently clear that he wanted to start his challenge on stage. Before we went on he whispered “Ready to do those vocals?” We had been working in spare time on me finally singing backup vocals and he must’ve thought I was suddenly ready.

  “Better late than never,” I replied with a wink, hitting the first note on my guitar, which sent the crowd into a frenzy. This was one of the larger crowds on the tour, easily over 4,000 more people than our past shows, and according to Raptor, one of the founders of RockOut Records was going to be front row tonight. I had heard of the label before, some of my favorite Alternative bands were signed to that label. According to the guys, if we played like tonight was our last show the label might sign us.

  I played the shit out of my guitar. I sang my heart out when I needed to. When all of us joined in harmony, it lit the venue on freaking fire. Harmonies always gave me the chills. I loved them. After one of our last songs, we played “Playing with Fire,” a newer song Luke and Cale wrote before we left for tour. It was by far the hardest song I’d ever played. I felt like this was the challenge Cale wanted to give me. Every time he let out a scream, he would make eye contact and hold my gaze, and I would repeat the notes he just sang. Now this was a battle. I let my voice go, soaring to higher notes than I’d ever sang before. The song was over and everyone was on their feet, chanting they wanted more.

  For a quick moment, I felt like we were the headliners. Taking my final bow before leaving the stage, I was on such a high that I decided to do something I’ve never done before: trash my guitar. I’d seen YouTube videos of musicians slam their guitars on stage, breaking it into pieces, and I thought why the hell not? It felt liberating. We had backup guitars back stage anyways, so why couldn’t I have a little fun?

  I finished my terrorizing and threw some of the pieces out to the audience before heading off stage. The guys high fived me, while Cale sat like a grump with his arms crossed. “What? Were you afraid I was going to lose the challenge?” I smirked. His face looked surprised, like I wasn’t capable of doing anything remotely rebellious.

  “I never said that, did I? I just hope that little stunt doesn’t blow our chances with that record label exec.” He reminded me of the Grinch right now. I threw a piece of wood from the guitar neck and snickered.

  “Relaxxx Cale. I have to be completely serious on stage?”

  After a couple of more minutes of bickering I heard someone fake cough behind me. I turned around and there was Damon. I had tried to avoid him ever since the incidence on the Everlasting bus, but right now there was no avoiding him. His grey eyes were especially darker right now and his blond hair a lot shorter than the last time I actually laid eyes on him. “I’ll be back in a sec,” I told the guys. I walked with Damon a few feet away.

  “Hey, I never got a
chance to apologize about what happened a couple of weeks ago…” Damon started to say, but I waved it off.

  “Don’t be. We were both drinking, you may have deserved your ass kicked, but I still think you’re a good guy.” I chuckled, and he smirked, showing off one gold tooth on the bottom row of teeth. “Is that from…?”

  “No, I fell down the stairs a couple of months ago at my parents’ house and lost the tooth. Dentist put this thing in instead; I thought it looked pretty cool at the time. Ladies love it.” Damon explained, and I laughed. He definitely knew how to put on the charm that’s for sure.

  “Well it suits you pretty nicely,” I replied.

  He put his hands in his pockets, shifting his feet up and down like he was waiting for me to say something. “So I was going to ask you, I don’t know if I should after what I did to you, but what the Hell. I was wondering if you would like to go out to dinner sometime coming up?”

  “I’d really like that, Damon.” I told him shyly, and his face lit up.

  “You really just said you would?”

  “Don’t make me change my mind, mister,” I warned him, and he reached for my hand.

  “Alright, alright! We’re in Chicago for a break and then a show the next day, why don’t we plan on going somewhere nice tomorrow?” Damon suggested. Chicago? I had never been there before. I knew my parents had rich friends that would visit from Chicago, but I assumed they were famous for pizza and being the “Windy City.”

  “Sounds amazing, I can’t wait.” I couldn’t contain my smile now. I felt like I was on Cloud Nine. Seeing the rest of the members of Ignite the Flames getting ready to go on stage, I waved to Lucy, who was dressed in a simple ripped up Guns N’ Roses T-shirt and black jeggings. Gesturing towards them I said “You should probably go,” I paused. “You know, sing your set and everything.”

  Damon ran a hand through his newly cut hair and sighed. “I should.” Wrapping his arms around me, he kissed me on the forehead. “I’ll see you probably tomorrow, okay?”

  “Kay. Good luck out there!” I shouted, as his band ran out on stage to dozens of bras and panties already lying in front of them. Shaking my head in amusement, I went back to the bus, where everyone was pretty much asleep. Asleep before midnight? These guys? It was shocking and surprising, but yet now I had a reason to call them old men. Not literally. Climbing into my bunk, I prepared to change into a pair of shorts and camisole, but not before I was interrupted.

  “Got good news, Schaefler, the label exec liked your little stunt.” Cale peeked up at me, sounding groggy. His hair was disheveled and wasn’t wearing a shirt.

  “HA! So what does this mean, we’re signed to the label now?” I asked curiously. I never understood the whole getting signed to a record label and how the details get worked out.

  “Not just yet, eager beaver. That was just one person that liked us. He has to go back to the label, and they have to come up with a contract. They’ll present it to us. We like the deal, we sign.” Looking at him dumbfounded, he cleared his throat and replied, “Don’t worry; you’ll learn all about the business in time, B. You’re still new at this, but that’s okay, you’re doing fine.” He patted my leg and crawled back into his bunk.

  “No goodnight?” I whispered quietly, trying not to wake the other guys.

  He stuck his head out again and smiled, “Good night, Bryn.”

  I giggled and sighed. “Good night, Cale.”

  Chapter 7: Lips of an Angel

  From the moment we rolled into Chicago, I fell in love. From the way the high towers rose into the clouds and the crazy amount of people on the streets, I loved it all. Luckily it was closer to the end of summer and still sunny out so I wouldn’t have to worry about bundling up for my “date” tonight. Damon told me to meet me outside of the Hard Rock Hotel later on tonight, where we all decided to stay in lieu of the buses. I was invited to go out to a club with Cale, Raptor, Luke and Vince, but I told them I was meeting up with Damon. Almost immediately they were hooting and hollering, telling me it was a bad mistake. I knew they were joking, but Cale was a whole other story. He thought I was joking.

  With him, I realized it was always another story.

  I stopped at one of the nicer stores I could find close to the hotel and bought a little black dress. It wasn’t too tight on my skin or skimpy by any means, but completely covering my chest with a halter top neck, and the hem stopping at my knees. I found a perfect pair of black and silver stilettos to match and a silver chain to top it off. Not doing much with my hair, I straightened it until it was straight; I lightly coated my eyes with mascara and eyeliner. I took a final look in the bathroom mirror, spraying down stray pieces of hair and grabbed my black clutch, ready to go. I passed the guys suite and I heard booming music, so I tried to run past as fast as I could without them ridiculing me about my outfit and teasing me some more.

  I could hear the click of the high heels as I took a step into the warm breeze that followed me and my eyes were darting to all of the city lights on the buildings around me. It was just around night time, but I saw women by the dozens wearing their fancy attire and men wearing suits holding hands, swaying like they’ve had too much to drink.

  “Wow, you look breathtaking.” I heard Damon’s gruff voice coming from the sidewalk behind me. I smiled as he handed me a dozen assorted roses, green paper covering the stems, and kissed me on the cheek.

  “Thank you. You don’t look so bad yourself,” I gestured to his baby blue button up shirt that was tucked into black slacks with a solid black belt. His sleeves were slightly rolled, so I could see a long tattoo ending at his wrist when I was pretty sure it started at his shoulder blade. His hair was slicked back with gel, and he had a whole different presence about him tonight. I couldn’t point my finger on it, but I had a feeling it would be a good night.

  “I may wear band shirts on a daily basis and have a shit ton of tattoos, but I can clean up nicely when I want. Especially when I’m taking a beautiful girl out to dinner after acting like a complete moron.”

  “So where are we going exactly?” I asked.

  “I figured we’d go to this amazing restaurant called ‘State and Lake.’ It’s just a little ways down the street, but it’s got a great view upstairs and the drinks are the best in town,” Damon explained, taking my hand with his. “Band and I ate here last time we were on tour.”

  “Anything with a view of this city is okay in my book,” I joked, as his fingers tightened around mine. “I could live here forever and deal with the harsh winter.”

  Damon looked in my eyes and nodded in agreement. “Are you from the same area as Cale and the rest of the guys?”

  “Yeah, I never knew that until I met them though. I grew up my whole life on the rich side of town, going to one of the fancy private schools where you had to be a millionaire to get in.” That wasn’t 100% true. The school had offered scholarships to those who couldn’t pay the hefty tuition. There were those rich girls that would know in a split second whether you were rich or just an ‘imposter.’ I hated those people.

  “Ahh… yeah they’re all good guys. Cale and I have been in enough fights over the past couple of years, but he’s just like a brother to me. Talented as hell,” Damon told me as he opened the door for me to the restaurant. “He’s still an idiot when he wants to be with that temper of his.”

  The waiter seated us at a table and we started studying the menu.

  “Would either of you care for an appetizer to split before you place your dinner order?” The waiter asked, keeping his eyes only on me the whole entire time he spoke.

  There were so many choices; I turned to Damon for help. “You can choose.” I told him. “I’ll eat anything.”

  “Hmmm…” He took another second, glancing over everything one more time. “We’ll split the wood grilled chicken wings. Can we get a side of ranch too please?”

  “Not a problem sir, I’ll be right back with those.” The waiter replied with a cheesy smile, finally pull
ing his eyes from me, before heading towards the kitchen.

  After he was away from our earshot, we both burst out laughing. Damon said “Holy shit, that guy was checking you out, Bryn. He made it way too obvious for his own good.”

  “You think so?”

  “I’m a guy. I can tell when someone is blatantly trying to get a girls attention. It’s cute, I’ll give him that.”

  “But you have nothing to worry about,” I assured him with one of my pearly white smiles. Before I knew it, lover boy was back with our appetizer. It was a hot heaping plate of chicken wings, and I couldn’t wait to burry myself in them. “Is it bad if I told you I’ve never had chicken wings before?”

  Damon’s mouth dropped. “No way. You really grew up sheltered didn’t you?”

  I nodded. “You could say that. Only time I was able to eat anything without a fancy name was when I snuck out with my friends and my ex, Ethan.” Dammit, I mentioned him. I never told anyone else in Everlasting about him, and I sure didn’t want to bring him up on this date with Damon.

  “Ahh, so what happened with him?”

  “We had different goals I guess. Thought I loved him, but things changed.” That was some of the truth. I loved Ethan with all of my heart, before I could even comprehend what love meant.

  “I’m sorry to hear that. But his loss, right?”

  “Exactly.”

  The rest of the night went better than I anticipated. We both had the seared salmon with cauliflower and it reminded me of home. Like when my parents would hire a cook to come in for our monthly family “get together.” I was surprised by how well the conversation was flowing between Damon and me. We talked about how he grew up just outside of Mackinaw Island, and how he formed Ignite the Flames after he met Lucy at a guitar workshop in Grand Rapids one summer in High School.

  “So what happened between Lucy and Cale?” I wondered. “Luke mentioned her once and Cale basically flipped out on him.”

  Damon rested his elbows on the table, moving his empty plate to the side. “Ahh now that is a sticky situation I’m afraid. Let’s say their ‘break-up’ is the reason you’re sitting here with me now.” What was he talking about? I cocked my head to the side in confusion and he cleared his throat. “I knew that’d make you think.”