Matthias

by Katie Dowe

  “A mother,” Kelly said gently. “You became a wife and mother almost immediately and with no space in between and a mother with four children at the same time. It is very hard to switch roles, darling, or to balance them.”

  “You are a wife, mother, and a successful businesswoman. How do you balance it?”

  “I love Kane more than anything in this world. Hell, I fought for that man and I do not allow anything to get between what we feel for each other, not even our children and certainly not our businesses. We find the time to be together and what is so fortunate about our lives is that we have people who can take care of our kids when we need to go somewhere. We go out on dates, still, even though we have been together for years. We travel as a family and when we tuck those children in, we concentrate on us.” She looked at the girl frankly. “You have been neglecting yourself, darling, and that cannot happen, and you have been neglecting your husband, which is the first step to losing him. Our husbands are handsome and rich and are targets for every woman who wants a good man, and they are. When Kane is with me, no matter the attention he is getting when we walk into a room, he has eyes only for me and it makes me feel powerful. Matthias has been through a lot in his childhood, don’t let him go through anymore.”

  *****

  She called him as soon as she reached home, but he did not pick up. She had called a stylist to come and do her hair and she had made up her mind to go to him. She called him again and hung up when he did not respond.

  “Damn you, Matthias!” she muttered as she tried him for the third time with no result. She called his assistant and got through to her.

  “I am sorry, Caitlin, but he is in a closed-door meeting and left his phone inside his office. Is it the children? Do you want me to go and get him?”

  “No, it’s fine, Maxine. Is he going out of the country this week?”

  “He is supposed to go to France and a stopover in the UK by Friday.”

  “When is he leaving?” Caitlin asked her.

  If the woman was wondering at the strangeness of the questions, she did not give any indication of it and Caitlin wondered if she knew what was going on between her and her husband.

  “On Wednesday.”

  “That’s tomorrow.” Caitlin closed her eyes and wondered how she could spin this. It would mean traveling tonight and leaving the children, but she had no choice. Kelly was right! She had to try to save her marriage! “Okay, Maxine, thanks. I want to surprise him, so I would appreciate you not saying anything to him.”

  “No problem. Do you want me to get the jet ready to pick you up at the holder?”

  Caitlin hesitated. “Will Matthias know if I do?”

  “He does not have to.”

  “Please do that.”

  “I will also arrange for a car to pick you up and take you to the apartment.”

  “You are a treasure, Maxine,” she said gratefully.

  “I am rooting for you, Caitlin.”

  “Thank you.”

  *****

  Matthias came out of the meeting an hour later and saw the number of missed calls from her. He was about to return the calls when Maxine came into his office. “She called me. It’s nothing urgent and the children are fine. She just wanted to talk.”

  Matthias nodded and put the phone down. “We have some reports to go over.”

  “Let me get you something to eat first.”

  “I am not hungry.”

  Maxine looked at him mildly. “You have not eaten since this morning, so I am taking the initiative and getting you something to eat. The chef prepared a delightful dish of steak with baby potatoes, your favorite.”

  He eyed her with his intense dark eyes, but she refused to be intimidated and he knew her well enough that she was not in the least bit afraid of him. “I don’t need a mother,” he told her gruffly.

  “I am well aware of that,” she told him smoothly. “But I happen to like you.” She walked over to his desk and pressed a button for the kitchen. “Send up the meal, Claudio.”

  “As soon as you have finished eating, we will go over the reports. I have some things on my desk to deal with.” Matthias watched her leave and close the door behind her, his expression amused. The amusement vanished as he took his phone up and looked at his wife’s name among the calls he had missed. He had been calling the house to check up on the children and had taken the coward’s way out and not called her. He had crept into the room they shared to look at her as she slept and had left right after. He had to decide and soon. He was not sure how long he could keep up the charade of a marriage that was not working and he had to decide. He leaned back and closed his eyes briefly. He had never told her he loved her so part of the blame had to be on him. His eyes snapped open when he heard the knock on the door and saw the chef himself wheeling the tray into his office. The man set up the meal on the table in the corner and went to pour him a glass of wine. It was almost four P.M. but he had some more work to do before he left the country tomorrow.

  “Thank you, Claudio.”

  *****

  Caitlin gripped her hands nervously in her lap as the plane made its descent. She had spent a long time looking at herself in the mirror when Bernie had finished with her hair. The man had trimmed off the ends and added some more highlights to the tips of the strands. She shook her head back and watched it bounce past her shoulders in waves. She still had the weight on, but she was hoping he would not mind it at all. This had to work, she thought desperately. She wanted her marriage to work more than anything else in the world and she was prepared to fight for it!

  Chapter 15

  She was thankful that the security at the desk knew who she was because he was a different one from the one that had been there before.

  “Mr. Zeng is not here yet, Mrs. Zeng,” he advised her as he opened the door for her and escorted her to the private elevator that would lead her up to his suite.

  “I am here to surprise him,” she told the man. “What’s your name?”

  “Lionel Belnavis, ma’am,” he said with a pleased smile as he doffed his cap, his weather-beaten black face beaming. “I have been working for your husband for the past five years.”

  “Very nice to meet you.” She extended a hand and he took it after a slight hesitation.

  “Same here, ma’am.” He beamed.

  “Please do me the favor of not telling Mr. Zeng that I am here. Friday will be his birthday and I am here to surprise him.”

  His face lit up at that. “I will not say a word, ” he promised.

  Caitlin wandered around the living room for a moment after she had put away her bag. She was more nervous than she had ever been in her entire life! She had seen his shirt slung carelessly over a chair in the bedroom and by the look of it, it had been one he had worn yesterday. She knew that he had someone who came in to keep the place clean for when he had to come to New York. A meal was already inside the warmer, so she did not have to prepare anything. Just put the wine into the bucket to keep it cool until he came. She glanced at the clock again and saw that it was almost nine. What if he had made prior arrangements with someone else? It had been months since they had been husband and wife and he had started traveling again. What if he was seeing someone else? Kelly was right when she said that their husbands were very handsome men and on top of that they were also very wealthy. She had been so taken up with her daughter’s health that she had ignored him. He had not called her and that was unusual. When Nurse Jacobs had mentioned that he had called her and asked after Catherine, she had realized how far they had drifted apart. She had to fix it and had to do it fast. She had become a person she did not recognize. She had heard stories of marriages breaking up after the children came and never dreamed it could happen to her! She was smart and she had loved Matthias since the first time she had seen him with his head bent over his device in the conference room. When he had looked up at her, she had felt a charge straight through her body! But somehow over the months, she had forgotten what was i
mportant to her. The children would always be important to her, but she needed their father. She had changed out of the faded denims and put on a blue silk robe-like dress that had been a part of the clothes she had ordered from Romano’s. The silk slid against her bare skin seductively and settled over the curves of her body. She had worried a little about the slight paunch of her belly, but there was nothing she could do about that right now. Her breasts had become more pronounced since she had had the children and that was something at least. Her hair was loose around her face and she was still wearing the make-up that Bernie had put on her before she left. She had told the staff that she would call tomorrow to check if everything was okay.

  “Go and be with your husband, my dear, you both deserve a break,” Nurse Jacobs had told her shrewdly. “The children will be fine.”

  She stiffened as she heard the door open and wondered if he would come straight into the living room. She listened as she heard him take the steps down into the living room and turned as he came into the room. She had left the light off and saw when he turned the switch, his eyes going to her immediately. She saw when he stiffened when he saw her and forced herself to stay where she was. He did not look pleased to see her.

  “Are the children okay?” His tone was so formal that she feared she was too late, she had left it too long!

  “They are.” She took a deep breath and continued. “Have you eaten?”

  “I had something at the office. What are you doing here, Caitlin?” He did not move towards her but stayed where he was.

  “How about some wine?” She whirled around and moved past him and went into the kitchen, hoping he would follow her. He did and watched as she got the two glasses and poured the wine from the bottle she had opened before he came home.

  “Are you supposed to be drinking?”

  “I am no longer breastfeeding.” She walked over and handed him the glass which he took from her. “How was your day?”

  His thick eyebrows lifted, and he did not respond.

  “I will just tell you about mine,” she said hastily as she sipped her wine, her eyes holding his. “I had lunch with Kelly, and we had a very illuminating conversation.” She paused and waited for him to ask about what, but he remained silent. She forced the quaking from her heart and plunged on determinedly. “Then I called Bernie, you know the stylist, and had him come over to do my hair.” She shook back the strands so that he would notice, but still he did not say anything. “Then I called Maxine and asked her where you would be, and she made the arrangement for me to come here.” She put the glass onto the granite counter and approached him. “Please say something.”

  “I am leaving for Europe in the morning,” He told her abruptly as he finished the wine. “You should have informed me that you were coming-”

  “Your birthday is on Friday and I did not want to miss that,” she broke in desperately, her eyes pleading.

  “I am afraid you are going to because I will be away until Sunday.”

  “I am coming with you!”

  “What?”

  She closed her eyes and reached out to put her hands on his chest feeling him flinch through the thin blue cotton of his shirt. “I am sorry, Matthias, I was wrong, and I am trying to make up for it.”

  He stepped back from her, his eyes expressionless. “We will talk when I get back. I am in some intense negotiations with some gallery owners both in France and in the UK and I cannot afford a distraction right now.”

  “Is that what I am? A distraction?” She tempered her frustration by taking a deep breath. She knew he was intractable sometimes, but she had not expected it now.

  “I cannot do this right now, Caitlin,” he told her coolly as he turned to leave the room.

  “Matthias?”

  He turned to look at her. “I did all this for you.” She indicated what had been done to her hair and her face and the robe she had on.

  “You used to do it for yourself,” he told her softly, his face sad. “You used to be this woman I admired more than any other. You used to be chic and beautiful because that was who you are. You coming here to try and fix us is by trying to fix up outside is not going to work, Caitlin. Something is wrong on the inside and that is what needs fixing. Do you think I care much how you look? You will always be beautiful no matter if you never had anything done to your hair or face. I really cannot do this now, Caitlin, I have some reports to deal with before I leave in the morning.”

  Caitlin felt as if her heart had stopped beating as she stared at him. “Are we over?” she whispered.

  “You are my wife and the mother of my children, we can never be over.” He passed a hand over his hair wearily. “I need time to sort things out and I am asking for that. I am using the jet tomorrow-”

  “I will take a regular flight back,” She told him stiffly.

  “I was going to tell you to stay tomorrow and take in some sights,” he told her with a faint smile. “Peter will be back later in the afternoon and then he will take you back.” He hesitated as he stared at her. “I really do not feel like celebrating my birthday anyway.”

  *****

  Caitlin sat inside the room with the doors closed and tried to stop the tears from falling from her eyes! He had walked away from her without even looking back and even the hope that he would come back to her and allow them to talk things through had died when an hour had passed, and he did not come into the room. She had failed! She should not have come in the first place; she had made a mistake and had been humiliated in the process! She swiped her hand across her wet cheek. She should go and find him and demand that he listen to her. But he was right. Something had gone wrong inside her when she had the children. Kelly had suggested postpartum depression, but she refused to believe it. “Darling, you went from being a career woman to a wife and mother in a heartbeat! Of course, you are depressed,” she had exclaimed. “See someone about it or talk to your husband about it, explain what you are feeling and make him understand.”

  She lay back against the pillows and closed her eyes. She had no intention of staying there all by herself after he left tomorrow. She had every intention of booking a flight and going home to her children tomorrow. She had tried and he had rejected her, and she would never try again!

  *****

  Matthias rested his head on his folded arms and stared up into the ceiling of his hotel room later that night after his meetings with the current gallery owners. He had spent the day in meetings and making pleasant conversations with them at lunch at the little café just a few meters away from the Louvre and thought about how Caitlin would have loved to explore the place. He should have taken her with him and tried and recapture the magic they had lost along the way. He should not have rejected her like that and should have taken the time to hear her out, but they were both hurting, and it was not going to take a quick fix to make things right. How could she not see that? He groaned as he remembered how she had looked in that robe, the curves of her body and her breasts. He closed his eyes and realized how starved he was. He had had plenty of offers, even since arriving in the country that afternoon, but he had not been tempted. It was only her and he could never cheat on her even to slake his thirst. It could never be satisfied with anyone else anyway. He got up abruptly to go and pour himself something from the liquor cabinet and brought it back to the bed with him. He had not lied to her when he told her that he had no wish to celebrate his birthday. At first, he had thought about suggesting that they spend it together by having dinner, but now it did not matter to him anymore!

  *****

  “Look who is back!” Steve exclaimed as she came into the main office. She had called and told him that she would be coming in but had not told him what time and that she would be there for the entire day. She had come back from her failed trip to New York, determined to get her life back. Her marriage might be on the rocks, but she had her children and her career that she loved. She had also promised to stop by and see her father before going home. She had been stopped
several times and asked by most of the staff to see pics of the babies and she had obliged them.

  “In my office now.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” he said with a slight bow.

  As soon as she stepped into the office that had originally been Matthias’, the memories came back to assail her. She had not changed anything because the décor was perfect, but it reminded her so much of him that it was almost heartbreaking! She looked up as Steve came into the room. “Where is Eve?”

  “Out on leave. I thought Matthias told you.” He looked at her curiously as he took his seat across from her.

  “He might have. Where is her replacement?”

  “In the editorial room getting acquainted with the editors. My suggestion by the way. If you really need her, I could ask someone to go and get her.”

  “That’s fine.” She was struggling to get back into the thick of things after been away for so long.

  “I must say that for a woman who carried four children inside her, you certainly look fine,” he said in admiration.

  “Can we actually get to work?”

  “Of course.” He handed her a folder with all his notes. “I am assuming that your husband has kept you up to date with the various publications going on. The gothic series is making a huge wave in social media. The author is now busy doing her fourth in the series.”

  She nodded. “What do we have for December?”

  “Are you back?” he demanded.

  She looked over at him, her tapered brows lifted. “What do you think?”

  “I don’t know, Caitlin.” He spread his hands. “I understand that having those babies were a big deal and I am sorry about all you had to go through especially with your daughter, believe me we were all praying for her, but you never called and we had no idea what was happening. So, all I am asking is if you are back for good?”

  She took her time before answering him. She had been about to blast him for his comments, but he was right. She had been silent for several months and now without saying anything had come back to take up the reins.