The Day He Went Away

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The Day He Went Away Page 4

by Millikin, Jennifer


  Truth be told, I think my friendship with Trent has run its course. He’s the same person he was in college, but now he has money and a good job. Kate tells me I’m loyal to a fault, and I’m starting to think she’s right about the fault part.

  “Ready.” Kate walks into the living room. She’s changed into pink shorts and a white shirt. Personally I liked when she was wearing my old white shirt. I learned that last night…and this morning.

  Kate walks ahead of me. She pretends to drag her feet, and I laugh.

  She looks over her shoulder and grins. “Remind me to force you to spend time with Harper sometime in the next week.”

  “Deal.” I reach past her for the door handle.

  Our drive to Trent’s house is short, but I use the ten minutes to ask Kate about something that has been on my mind.

  “When was the last time you wrote something?”

  Kate turns confused eyes to me. “I wrote a grocery list on my phone this morning.” Her eyes have gone back to the road, so she doesn’t see me roll mine.

  “When was the last time you wrote for pleasure?”

  “At work, the day you arrived.”

  I shake my head. “Still not what I meant. When was the last time you wrote a story?”

  “I write non-fiction stories all the time. They’re called press releases.” She spares a quick, weary glance at me.

  This is painful. “Okay, let’s try this again, and I’ll be very specific. When was the last time you wrote a story for pleasure while you were not at work?”

  She gives a short, disbelieving chuckle and says, “Years.”

  “Why?”

  “I don’t have time for that stuff anymore. I can’t waste my time on anything that doesn’t have a direct impact on my career.”

  Achieve, succeed. So Kate. So her father.

  “You used to love writing stories.” My reminder is as gentle as it can be. Kate and art don’t mix. She doesn’t do abstract thought. But she used to.

  She opens her mouth, but I stop her with a raised hand. “A Gust of Wind and He Was Gone. The Princess and her Unruly Dragon. Ethan and Kate: Apocalypse Partners. Where the Red Roses Grow.” The titles tick off on the fingers of my raised hand. “Need I continue? I can.”

  “I can’t believe you remember all those stories.” Her voice is soft.

  “I remember a lot more than those four. You read them to me every time you got a chance.” I shift in my seat to look at her, so I can see how she takes what I’m about to say. “I know why you stopped writing. But what about now? Your dad… He’s been gone for five years. And don’t you think the Master of Everything has achieved it all? Can you go back to your true passion? Rekindle the flame?”

  Kate’s lips push together until they turn white in the center. She stares at the road.

  This is about so much more than just Kate returning to writing. Defeating the beliefs of what would make her father proudest is Kate’s battle.

  She’s still quiet.

  “Katie?”

  No response.

  A few minutes later, she pulls up at Trent’s house. Zane’s car is parked in the driveway, and I feel a twinge of guilt for not arriving before him. Zane likes Trent enough, but I know he wouldn’t go out of his way to be his friend. They don’t hang out unless I’m around.

  We step from her car, and she looks at me over the roof.

  “Thank you for being my best friend. You’re the very best friend in the history of best friends.”

  “Is that your way of saying 'Thanks, but no thanks'?”

  Her head shakes. “It isn’t something I can think about right now.” She throws an uneasy glance back at Trent’s house.

  I drop it. Besides, I did what I wanted to do. I planted a seed.

  Kate looks up at me when we get to the front door. I grab her hand and wink. “Everything will be fine. We’ll just be here for a little while.”

  I drop her hand and hit the door twice with two knuckles, then open it without waiting for Trent to let us in.

  “Dude!” Trent’s voice booms as he comes toward us. Zane’s head bobs behind him. “What have they been feeding you over there?” He grabs my bicep and squeezes. “I bet the ladies love that.”

  I glance at Kate. Her lip is curled.

  “Kate!” Zane comes from behind Trent. He grabs her shoulders and pulls her in for a hug, like he doesn’t remember she’s tiny and he’s huge. Her face smashes into his chest, then he releases her.

  Kate steps back and wiggles her nose, but she’s smiling. “Nice to see you too, Zane.”

  One side of my mouth turns up as I watch them, but falls when I look at Trent. He looks sullen.

  Zane extends his hand and I take it, pulling him to me for a hug at the same time.

  “Good to see you, man.” Zane’s voice is emotional. His huge heart is another thing hidden by his brawn. He lets me go after a couple solid slaps on my back.

  “I hope we’re not interrupting your plans.” Trent doesn’t look the tiniest bit sincere as he says it.

  “No way.” Another grab and squeeze of Kate’s hand to reassure her, just like before we walked in the house.

  Trent turns and starts for the kitchen. “Ethan, come help me grab drinks. Kate, make yourself comfortable in the living room.”

  She follows Zane while I go with Trent.

  “What’s going on with you and Masters these days?” Trent throws a thumb back to where Kate is.

  “What do you mean?” I take the two beers Trent’s holding out. He turns back to the fridge and grabs one more.

  “It’s been a long time. I was just checking to see if you’re still wasting your time on her.”

  My eyes narrow. “Kate’s off-limits. Don’t talk about her.” My voice is rough, precise. Like my sergeant when he’s smoking someone for not making it to formation on time.

  Trent doesn’t say anything else. Which is good for him, because I’m at the end of my rope, and we just walked in the door.

  Kate’s right. It’s time for Trent to stop using his past as a crutch.

  We walk back out to the living room, where Zane’s asking Kate a question.

  “So, Masters, what have you been doing with yourself? I haven’t seen you since the last time Ethan was here.”

  She shrugs. “Same old, same old. I’m still in PR at Simone. How about you?”

  Zane grimaces. “Studying my ass off. I added a science and technology focus, which will be good when I’m done. But right now it means more work.”

  Kate smiles sympathetically. “Are you at least going to Idaho for the summer?”

  He nods, taking the beer I’m holding out for him. “My grandma would be upset if I didn’t. It’s tradition.”

  “I wish I had a place to escape to every summer,” Trent says as he tosses a bottle of water to Kate.

  “Thanks!” She says with fake cheerfulness.

  “Sure thing!” He responds in the same tone.

  I settle myself on the couch next to Kate. She winds her right arm through my left. I look at her, remembering how she looked this morning before she woke up. Her long, toned legs, those adorable pink panties with the white ruffled trim.

  “How’s Harper doing?” Trent leans back into his chair and crosses an ankle over a knee.

  It’s a small miracle Harper isn’t interested in Trent, even though he’s made it clear how interested he is in her. If they dated Kate would have to spend more time around him than she’s already forced to. Bad enough she has to spend time with Harper.

  She musters a polite smile. “Great. She loves her job. It’s pretty much all she does. Well, that and party. But the two go hand in hand. Being a party planner has its perks, according to her.”

  Trent nods and shifts his attention to me.

  “Ethan, tell me about life over there.” I’m happy he’s moved his attention off Kate. She’d rather go to the dentist than make conversation with Trent.

  “It's whatever.” I shrug. “I’m headed
to Afghanistan after I leave here. Just trading one desert for another.”

  “What do you do every day?” Trent prods.

  I shrug again. “I’ve been in Germany, getting ready for deployment. It leaves a lot of downtime, so I’ve been at the gym.”

  Trent grins. “I know someone who’s going to like your buff arms.”

  Oh shit. My leg that’s touching Kate tenses. She turns to me, but I can’t bring myself to look at her. I don’t want to see the look on her face right now. This is going to ruin everything. Whatever Kate was starting to feel for me, this will end it.

  “Who’s going to like Ethan’s arms?” I hear the struggle in Kate’s voice as she tries to sound calm. Zane clears his throat.

  Trent waves a hand in the air. “I've been seeing this girl, and we thought it would be fun to set Ethan up with her friend. Everything is ready for tomorrow night.”

  Tomorrow night? Shit. I forgot. The blind date. It’s been so long since I agreed to go.

  Trent glances from Kate to me. “Amaya says her friend loves military guys.” His eyebrows wiggle suggestively.

  Without a doubt, Trent is trying to provoke Kate. I want to tell him off, but I’m frozen. All I can think of is Kate and how she’s feeling inside. And how I’m going to make this situation right. And if I can. And if I even need to. You’ve seen how she’s been acting. You definitely need to.

  If I’m right and she’s starting to change her mind about us, then right now, Kate feels humiliated. And it’s made worse by the fact that she has to experience this in front of Trent, who clearly enjoys watching her react. He brought up this date on purpose. It’s classic, meddling Trent.

  Trent got what he wanted. Kate’s angry. But he’s also going to get a little something extra. From me.

  Kate stands up from the couch and snatches her purse from the floor in one swift motion.

  “I need to go.” She turns flashing eyes on me. “Maybe Amaya’s friend can take you to your parents’ house.”

  She makes it three steps when I finally regain the ability to speak. “It's not what you think.”

  She whips around, glaring down at me where I perch on the edge of the couch. Her eyes aren’t flashing anymore.

  “I need to go,” she repeats, her face morose.

  “Calm down, Kate.” Trent’s voice is caustic. Toxic. “You know he loves you. He’s loved you since before he could write his own name.”

  Kate’s temper is something to be reckoned with, and very few people get to see it. She keeps it under wraps, because Kate Masters is perfect, and having a temper isn’t acceptable for a perfect person.

  She stomps to him and points a finger in his face. “You are your own self-sustaining group of high school mean girls. You gossip, you lie, and you orchestrate fights. Here's a tip: Real men don't behave that way.”

  She pivots and hurries out of Trent’s house. I stay seated, giving Kate the space she needs. Zane’s concerned eyes meet mine and his lips twist.

  It’s quiet until Trent breaks the silence. “Masters can really be dramatic when she wants to be. Typical girl.”

  “You did that on purpose.” I say quietly, standing up from the couch.

  Trent has the nerve to look affronted. It’s the fundamental issue with the guy. He’s a victim, no matter what he’s done to contribute to the problem. Somehow, he’ll always manage to be the victim.

  “I need to go after her.” I pinch the bridge of my nose and picture Kate’s face before she ran out.

  Zane stands. “I’ll take you.”

  “Just let her go.” Trent crosses his arms. “She’s made it clear she only wants you when someone else does.”

  “That’s not for you to decide.”

  When I stride out of Trent’s house, it feels like an ending. Sometimes, people have to be cut off. Trim the fat, as Nick would say.

  Zane points his car in the direction of Kate’s apartment.

  He doesn’t make small talk, but at a red light he taps my chest with the back of his hand, his head moving up and down in one slow nod. Is he approving of me going after Kate? Or saying goodbye to Trent? I don’t ask. I don’t want to talk.

  My elbow rests against the car door and I toy with my lip as I recall Kate’s reaction.

  Her devastated face macerates my insides.

  I have to make this right.

  I can't lose her now. Not when she's so close.

  ***

  Zane dropped me off with a wave, and now I’m pacing the walkway in front of Kate’s apartment complex. I stop to send up a silent prayer of thanks that Harper’s car is gone. I don’t need her here for this.

  I take deep breaths, building up my nerve. I’m going to have to demand answers from Kate. I deserve to hear the reason why she’s getting jealous and running from houses, leaving me stranded. I have nine precious days left on my leave before I head to Afghanistan, and I can’t spend them at odds with her.

  Each step, each stair, takes me closer and closer to Kate. To her truth. Quite possibly the truth I’ve been waiting ten years to hear.

  My mouth is dry. My fingers find my wrist and check my pulse. Racing.

  What am I going to do when she opens the door? How is this going to go?

  I reach her door. I stand there, but I can’t knock. I stare at the glass in the peephole and wipe my hands on the front of my shorts. This might be it. This might be the moment I’ve dreamed of, over and over, for years.

  You can do this. I shift onto my left foot, then bounce to my right. Left, right. Left, right. Left, right.

  My limbs feel warm now. Not so stiff. My head clears as the adrenaline pumps.

  There is a boy

  And he loves a girl

  She doesn’t love him back

  He doesn’t care

  One day she will love him

  Until then, he waits.

  Not anymore.

  I want answers.

  I lift my hand and knock.

  5

  Kate

  Someone is banging on my door.

  Ethan. Please be Ethan.

  I see a blue shirt when I peer through the peephole. He came after me. I should have known he would. He’s Ethan. He’ll always come for me.

  I take a deep breath, prepared to say what I’ve been practicing since I stopped crying.

  I open the door, mouth open, ready to speak, but I don’t get to.

  Ethan barrels in as soon as the door is open wide enough, knocking me off balance.

  “Hey,” I sputter, grabbing the door handle to catch myself.

  Ethan's eyes are bright. He doesn't mention anything about nearly knocking me over.

  I shut my front door and watch Ethan as he moves from foot to foot, agitated.

  “You have no right to be angry with me.” His eyes are intense, pulled together. His voice is loud and deep.

  Where is my mild-mannered, even-keeled best friend?

  “Why do you care if I take someone on a date? You don’t want to date me. You’ve made that clear.” Ethan’s hands run across his closely cropped hair. “I’ve been waiting for you for years. Literally. I’ve been in love with you for ten years. How much longer am I supposed to wait?” Ethan’s voice is louder now. He watches me. I’m so shocked and confused by this angry Ethan, I can’t speak.

  “I…I…” I hate when I stammer. Thoughts bounce around my head, but nothing comes together to form a coherent sentence.

  Say something.

  But I can’t. My mouth, my brain, my body, everything is failing me. I’m supposed to keep my mouth shut about my feelings and give Ethan my blessing. That was the brilliant plan I came up with on my drive home from Trent’s. Tell Ethan to move on, once and for all. Then I can ensure he’ll stay my best friend forever. No risk, no loss.

  And no reward either.

  I close my eyes and take a deep breath. “You should take out Amaya’s friend. I overreacted.” I hate every word slithering out of my lying mouth. “I was being overprotectiv
e. I’m sorry.” When I look into Ethan’s eyes, I see disappointment, but I continue. “You’re my best friend, but you don’t belong to me. You can date whomever you please.” Knife, heart, twist. Ouch.

  Ethan reaches for me. I let him pull me in. When his forehead touches mine, it takes everything in me not to lean in just a little more and press my lips to his. Our first kiss.

  Let him go.

  My eyes burn. Tears are seconds away.

  Ethan’s eyes close. I follow. This is too much to bear.

  “There’s a problem, Katie.” The heat of his whisper is on my face. “I gave my heart away a long, long time ago. To a girl with brown hair and freckles. And she’s never given it back.”

  My heart…I feel the most vital organ in my body.

  Pulsing.

  Throbbing.

  Galloping.

  Suddenly a memory crashes down on me. We were eighteen, and it was our birthday. My high school boyfriend broke up with me the day before and I was devastated. Ethan left an envelope at my front door. I opened it, expecting a birthday card. It was a piece of white paper, folded in half, the inside blank except for his writing. I would give anything for what he threw away, he’d scrawled in his terrible, chicken scratch handwriting. When Ethan came over later for cake he pretended like nothing happened. So did I.

  He would give anything for me…

  What am I doing?

  This man is my best friend. He knows my ugliest parts and he would still give anything for me.

  My breath comes in shaky gasps as my love for him flows over me.

  It’s him. It’s always been him.

  My limbs feel hollow. The warmth of his skin radiates off him, pouring onto me. I gulp in a breath and open my mouth. “The girl with brown hair and freckles… She isn’t going to give your heart back.” These words… I love every one of them.

  The pressure of his forehead disappears. I open my eyes and see he's moved only inches away. Emotion rides across his face. But all of it good. So, so good.

  “Katie, I need you to be very clear. What are you saying?” His deep voice rumbles in his chest.

 

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