Finding You (Finding You Series Book 1)

by Amanda Mackey

  “I’m not going to be able to keep my hands off you in that dress. Plus we haven’t finished what we started earlier.”

  I felt my cheeks heat, soaking up the compliments like a sponge. I certainly hadn’t forgotten about our tryst earlier in the afternoon. Anticipation titillated me.

  Kyle squeezed my hand as we walked over to a small van, which was to be our transport. Compliments of the film crew again.

  “I hope you don’t mind a few bumps. It’s nothing flashy but it’s free and it’s leaving now.” We both got in beside the driver.

  “Dakota Livingston, I’d like you to meet the film director, Jacob Edwards. He’ll be our chauffeur for the evening.”

  Leaning over, I shook hands with Jacob. His size astounded me. He had a large stomach that protruded out onto the steering wheel and an auburn crop of hair, which brushed the roof of the car. His freckled face looked red and painful from too much sun but his green eyes shone brightly as he smiled.

  “Nice to meet you, Dakota. Boy, Kyle was right. You sure are purdy. What are you doing getting hooked up with a wild one like Kyle?” he joked, ruffling Kyle’s shirt, roaring with laughter.

  “Oh, don’t you listen to him, Dakota. He’s just jealous that I’m going out with the most beautiful girl on the island and all he’s got is a six pack of beer and a stomach ulcer the size of New York.”

  Snickering, I couldn’t help but relax. I liked Jacob straight away. He seemed real, not fake, and spoke to me like I was a part of his crew and not a stranger. It was refreshing.

  The lighthearted banter between the two men continued all the way to the club. They genuinely seemed close, like brothers, which was nice to see between employees. It was a welcome distraction.

  In ten minutes, we were thanking Jacob and getting out of the van to walk past the security guard who took one look inside the car at Jacob and nodded to us to go straight in. One of the perks of being in the loop, I guess.

  We scanned the room until we found a vacant table towards the back of the club. I had to let my eyes adjust to the darkness that was only broken by a multi-colored disco ball swinging from the roof above the dance floor and a few dim lamps that were scattered here and there.

  “What would my beautiful girl like to drink?’ Kyle asked as he led me toward our table, his hand firmly on the small of my back.

  “I’ll have the usual, please.” He needn’t have asked. My routine was as rigid with my drinks as it was with my double-checking the locks on my doors at night back home. I found old habits hard to change. Familiarity was safe.

  Kyle ambled away getting swallowed by the crowd, the only part of him still visible was his head that bobbed along as he walked. I took in the club’s offerings after my eyes adjusted. The inside was quite small, which is probably why it seemed so packed. A dance floor perched in the middle of the open room, filled with mingling bodies, grinding and gyrating against each other. I felt my thigh muscles squeeze together and I gawked at the openly sensual moves, feeling a bit like a voyeur sitting alone in the darkness.

  The music was so loud, I could barely hear myself think. It was actually a blessing. I didn’t need to think tonight. I just needed to have fun.

  There were a few touristy-looking people mingling in the crowd, laughing and generally trying to be heard and I couldn’t help but wonder if they were some of the film crew that I hadn’t met yet.

  A glass smashed somewhere, which didn’t surprise me. With all the people and drink floating around the room, it was bound to happen. I hope they managed to clean it up before someone stepped on it.

  Kyle found his way back to me carrying our drinks, placing them down on a drink coaster before pulling his chair around next to mine and taking a seat. His closeness relaxed me. I felt safe when he was near, knowing he would never let anything happen to me.

  “I think it was definitely fate that brought us together,” he deduced, in between sips of his drink. “Someone up there was looking after us.” He peered up at the ceiling that was really meant to be the sky.

  I snorted and agreed with him. “I have a confession to make and it’s probably going to sound a little strange.”

  “Another confession? Hmmm, let’s see. You’re really a swinger who’s into open relationships?”

  “Kyle! I’m serious!” I swatted him on the arm, playfully.

  “Okay, okay. Go on.”

  “I see auras.”

  “Oh.”

  “Oh? Is that it?”

  “Well, yeah. I mean that’s great! Can you see mine?”

  “Uh huh.” Oh, how I could see it. It was beautiful.

  “And?”

  “Well, it’s stunning, actually.”

  “What does it look like?”

  “It’s green and sometimes has pink in it.”

  “What does that mean?” He genuinely seemed interested and not at all phased by my declaration.

  “Green is good. Green is peaceful and calm and loving and compassionate. I would say that it’s a pretty good example of your character.”

  His eyes never left mine. There was no judgment, just encompassing acceptance of my gift.

  “Okay, my turn. I have a confession, too.” There was a pause as if he was gauging my reaction so I lifted my eyebrows for him to continue. “I see people.”

  “Dead people?” My eyes must have looked like saucers because he snickered.

  “No. Living people. I’m very good at working people out. I see you.”

  “And?”

  “And, you are the most courageous woman I’ve ever met. You are filled with kindness even after you’ve been shown so much pain. Words can’t describe how I feel when you’re near. That first night, in the restaurant, I saw you as soon as I first walked in. You were eating and didn’t notice me at first. The noisy bunch I was with kind of got your attention.”

  “Haha. Noisy? That’s an understatement! But I’m thankful they were noisy because they helped me find you.”

  I meant every word. I was so grateful for that fateful night. His soft hand found the top of mine on the table, providing me with comfort as his thumb rubbed gently on my wrist bone. We sat in a comfortable silence, watching each other. There was a question I was dying to ask even though I pretty much already knew the answer. I wanted to hear him say it. “Do you think it’s weird that I can see auras?”

  “No, not at all. It’s just one of the many qualities that make you who you are. In fact, it just confirms how special you really are.”

  He leaned over the table, and in front of everyone, he planted a kiss on my wet lips. I could taste the vodka, so responded willingly. We didn’t let it deepen but rather savored it until Kyle pulled back and whispered, “What’s my aura doing now.”

  Eying it in my peripheral vision I could see it had changed. The green that I’d previously seen had now expanded fully around his head and down his body to mingle with pink and indigo. The green had definitely taken over, though.

  “Wow! After that kiss the green has expanded out from you so much more! I guess that means that you’re experiencing emotions of love.”

  Kyle gave me his mega-watt smile that had me grinning back. “I guess it does then, doesn’t it.” His eyes sparkled as his hand came up to tuck one side of my hair behind my ear.

  The air left my lungs at the innuendo. Was he? Could he? What was he saying? That he loved me? That wasn’t possible. Not me. Not with Kyle. He was somebody. I was nobody. I swallowed his words, dismissing them. I was reading in to things. I would never get my hopes up only to have them dashed. The kiss must have done something to my brain.

  He planted a kiss on my nose and then moved to the sensitive spot below my ear.

  “Even in the company of so many people I can’t resist kissing you.” The taste of him lingered on me, mixed with the smell of soap and subtle aftershave.

  I felt heady.

  ACDC’s ‘It’s a Long Way to the Top’ thrashed from the jukebox, startling both of us. The table wobbled, a
lmost causing a disaster on my new dress with my drink.

  Kyle snatched me by the arm and hauled me up out of the chair and onto the dance floor.

  “Come on, Ginger, let’s dance!”

  I knew he had to be referencing Ginger Rogers, so I humored him.

  “Show me the way, Fred.”

  We weren’t nearly as graceful as Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, the song choice being miles away from their genre of dancing, but it was a night of not caring. A night of letting go. I even dared to air guitar at the chorus while screaming my lungs out to the rest of the song. I knew the words well, having grown up with ACDC back in Australia. The floor was crowded so it didn’t matter what anyone looked like. We were cocooned in.

  “They don’t make the dance floors big enough these days,” I yelled in frustration, making excuses as to why I kept banging into people.

  Kyle stirred the cauldron. “I think the vodka is going to your head already!” He laughed as I stepped on someone’s toes and then in shock I swung around to knock another man in his side with my elbow. He moved out of my way, clearly under the impression that I was a danger to everyone as Kyle pulled me in close to him, decreasing the room we needed.

  “I was doing just fine until everyone else joined us. I suddenly feel like a sardine in a can.”

  Kyle hadn’t stopped laughing so I jabbed him in the ribs. “What’s so funny, Mister?”

  “You. I mean, not you but watching you let go and come out of your shell.”

  “Yeah well, I think I’ve had enough of this crammed space. I don’t do crowds very well. Would you mind if we went back to our table and finished our drinks?”

  “Of course I don’t mind. Come on.”

  He led me back to our waiting drinks. I was happy to be in a more secluded spot. Being in a room full of lots of people had always made me nervous. I was far more comfortable with a small group of friends or one on one.

  “Are you having a good time?” Kyle was hopeful as he emptied his glass in one swig.

  “I’m having a great time.” It was true. There were so many things I’d never have done back home. Embarrassing myself with the air guitar was one of them. Kyle was bringing out a side to me I didn’t know existed. If only I didn’t have to leave the day after tomorrow. Once again, destiny had stepped in.

  The food at the club didn’t compare to Ramah’s home-cooked meals, but we were both starving so quickly ordered from the limited menu. Kyle wanted fish and salad and I opted for some chicken and fried rice.

  While we waited, Kyle went and got another couple of glasses and a pitcher of water to have with our meals.

  I couldn’t help but fixate my eyes on his retreating form every time he got up. He was exquisite as far as men went. I didn’t know how I had become so lucky. Women’s gazes followed him wherever he went and it wasn’t just because of who he was but rather how he held himself in such a confident way. It was most definitely how his sculptured body moved lithely towards his destination and it was most certainly how his piercing blue eyes sparkled like diamonds above his ripe mouth that upturned at the corners.

  My body heated instantly as I waited patiently for the water that I hoped was cold enough to douse the fire burning inside.

  I picked up a drink coaster and used it to unsuccessfully fan my face.

  “Are you hot?” Kyle ground his mischievous eyes into mine as he beamed, approaching the table, placing the drinks and carafe down on the table before sitting.

  Feeling a little silly, I threw the coaster down on the table and took a swig of the water which was cool enough to extinguish some of the warmth before squealing, “It’s all the body heat.”

  “Really?” His eyebrows rose with interest, mouth trying to suppress a chuckle.

  I waved my hand around to clarify my statement. “The heat from all the people in here.”

  He leaned in to me, nipping my ear. “Oh, because for a second there I thought you meant it was my body heat affecting you.” Pulling some hair away from my neck he kissed me down to my collarbone, bringing goose-bumps to my skin from the water that had cooled his lips.

  I couldn’t help but lean into him and let a mew leave my lips. My neck was incredibly sensitive, as if all my nerve endings were amassed in that one spot.

  We heard someone clear their throat and Kyle pulled away, winking at me as the waiter stood before us with our meals.

  I was grateful for the distraction because at that point, my body wanted to straddle Kyle and give in to the lust I could feel building.

  We both dug into our food, not talking, which suited me fine. It gave me something to do with my hands and mouth and even that thought had me closing my eyes to contemplate what I really wanted to do with my hands and mouth.

  God! What was happening to me? Was I turning into some sex-starved nymph? It wasn’t like I’d never had sex but I simply didn’t class what had happened between John and I as sex. It had been more like torture. Shit. I really needed to get out of my own head.

  After we’d mopped up the last fragments of food with a bread roll that had been placed on a side plate, Kyle made me an offer I couldn’t refuse.

  “Come back to my hut and spend the night.” It wasn’t a question but more of a plead. I hated to see men beg. Plus, I’d never been to his hut. It would give me a glimpse inside his world.

  “I was wondering when you’d offer. You know you can tell a lot about a man by the state of his home.”

  “You’ll have to let me know what you can tell about me then.” There was a gleam in his eyes as we exited the club and climbed into a waiting cab which sped us back to the resort.

  Stepping across the threshold, I was surprised. There were a few discarded items of clothing scattered here and there but it really wasn’t as bad as I’d conjured up. The hut itself was a carbon copy of mine with slightly different furniture. It looked as if Kyle was still living out of his suitcase, and given his profession, I’d say he’d had plenty of practice at it.

  Taken off guard, I was whisked off my feet like a new bride. Kyle carried me over to the bed and eased me down, falling on top of me. We had some unfinished business to tend to that had been percolating all evening.

  Kyle’s expression became serious. “We don’t have to do this, you know. If you’re not ready.”

  The honest truth was, I was ready. I wanted him fully. We would be separated the day after tomorrow and I didn’t want to leave without letting him know how I felt. I needed to show him and more than anything I needed him to show me.

  “I want to.”

  He smiled. “In that case, where were we?’ His mouth sought out my erogenous zone below my ear.

  A manic longing drove into me hard. My back arched upward, eyes closed, fingers clasping the bed sheets.

  “Let me pleasure you first. I want to give to you all that I have. Tonight is your night.” As much as I wanted to return the favor and give to him as well, who could argue? This man was prepared to pleasure me in ways I’d only read about in women’s magazines without expecting anything in return. All that needed to be done was lie back and take.

  And take I did. His hands found parts of my body that rose to the sensation of his touch. His mouth teased and tickled, nibbled, and sucked. I let myself fall into the abyss.

  I opened my vault and gave myself permission to untie the chains that had bound me up to this point, relinquishing suppressed emotional turmoil, heartache, grief, and pain in a flurry of promiscuous, wanton passion. My soul opened up.

  He wasted no time undressing me, tossing the clothing aside as if it were nothing more than a hindrance. For a second, my heart stopped as I realized that all my scars were bared for him to see but as his mouth and tongue caressed both sides of my neck again and then moved down to where the rise of my breasts began, I let the thought go. Kyle didn’t care about any imperfections. He wasn’t that superficial. He had looked past my skin to see who I truly was.

  Combing his prickly hair with my fingers, I squee
zed his scalp involuntarily as his moist lips found my hard nipples. They ached gloriously as his teeth grazed each one before he sucked hard, laving his tongue over the ends. I cried out, pushing his head down harder, the sensitivity of the buds bordering on pain. This wasn’t a cruel pain though it was a euphoric pain.

  Already I needed release but knew he was only beginning his torturous assault.

  Kyle looked up at me through hooded eyes, “Are you okay?”

  “Yes. I’m more than okay. I want you.” It fell out of my open mouth without care, driven by a need that possessed me.

  His restraint was very gallant. The pleasure I received excelled anything previous.

  “Not yet. I want to give you this as a token of my affection. When we’re apart, know that I gave you all I had and wanted nothing in return.”

  I bit my lip as his fingers worked their magic, stroking a path over my stomach, stopping just short of my small mound of pubic hair that I had managed to trim the day before. My toes curled in expectation.

  Every nerve ending came alive at his touch, prickling my skin as the soft pads of his fingers caressed my navel. His tongue followed suit, licking a path of mass destruction from one hip bone to the other, teasing me. I clenched his head, eliciting a groan from Kyle. It was a sound I was becoming addicted to. I loved the affect I had on him and in turn the vibration of his throaty growl on my skin released my own moan.

  He lifted his head to lock eyes with me and in that moment, as his face painted a picture of pure lust, I was gone. Essentially in the moment, my ability to think coherently about anything else was eradicated.

  I must have looked feral with my bed hair from thrashing my head around at his ministrations and the look of hunger I gave him because he sucked in a breath through clenched teeth, closing his eyes and then hitting his target spot on with his sensuous lips.

  I didn’t know what came out of my throat as it was a noise I’d never made before but it was ripped out of me when his tongue found my core. I opened to him, desperately needing more of what he was offering as I rocked my hips in time with his lapping at my folds.