Protecting his Love (His Love)

by Perry, M. J.

  They both gasped together, and I rolled my eyes. “Two days.” I amended. I’d have to give the cakes away because she will sneak down in the middle of the night and scoff them. Ryder wasn’t having anymore either, he’s a bad influence. Who am I kidding; he has me wrapped around his finger as much as my daughter does.

  “I’m sorry Mummy, but they are just so yummy.” She stuck it back in her mouth taking a huge bite before running into the living room again.

  “Plate!” I shouted after her and she came scurrying in to get one.

  When she’d gone Ryder stood next to me. “She’s a good girl, but she’s really cheeky.”

  “I know,” I said smiling.

  “I wouldn’t change her though.”

  “Neither would I.”

  “Her mother is doing a good job of bringing her up.”

  “Thanks, but it’s not all me, her father helps too.”

  “Not really, I mean, I know he has her on the weekends, but she’s all you. From her manners to her sweetness to her loving ways, she’s all you, Lexi.”

  I blushed feeling proud. “Thanks.”

  “You’re going to get used to compliments.”

  “I am?”

  “Oh yeah, every day I’m going to give you one. We’ll work on the way you see yourself and when I’m finished, you’ll know how beautiful you are.”

  “You make me feel beautiful,” I admitted.

  “That’s because you are.” He kissed my head, the caress of his lips made me shiver. “I need to go, I have a few things to look into, but I’ll be over first thing in the morning.”

  “You will?”

  “Yeah, I will. Katie’s off school so I’m going to take you out for the day unless you’d rather spend the day just you and her?”

  I shook my head. “Katie will love spending the day with you.”

  He raised his eyebrows.

  “I will too.”

  “That’s what I want to hear. I’ll bring breakfast about eight.”

  “I can cook.” I offered.

  “No, Lexi tomorrow is all about relaxing and you hate cooking. I’ll grab something from the diner.”

  “I won’t complain about that.”

  “Great, I’ll see you in the morning. Sweet dreams.” He said softly.

  “Goodnight Ryder.”

  He watched me for a long moment before he turned to leave and I wondered what he’d read on my face. I’d never been good at hiding my emotions.

  I listened to him telling Katie he’d see her in the morning and I heard the excitement in her voice when he told her we were going out for the day. The front door opened and then closed and I heard him tap the door. With a smile I walked to the front door and locked it, sliding the safety chain on as well, as he waited like he usually did. He nodded at me through the window and the sound of his footsteps told me he was moving down my porch steps. I drew the curtain across the door and then went into the living room and drew those curtains too. I hated the thought of people being able to see in our home, we might be surrounded by trees, but it still felt open at night. I sat down next to Katie and she immediately crawled into my lap.

  I ran my hands through her hair gently knowing she loved it while she watched her cartoons. The thought of her going off to her father’s house next week made me want to cry. Julian’s behaviour was so out of character, I never thought he’d ever lay a finger on me, but he’d come close. I was glad Ryder banned him from the house, but Julian not being close meant I couldn’t try to find out what the hell was going on. I needed to speak to Ryder tomorrow and see what he thought about letting her go to Julian’s house. He’s a detective; he must have some idea of people like Julian, people who’d suddenly changed personalities overnight.

  Today had been the oddest day I’d had in a long time, maybe even ever. I have a crazy ex-husband, a daughter who’s determined to look like a cookie and a next door neighbour who has suddenly turned into a boyfriend, a partner, a lover? I wasn’t sure what he was, but none of the words sounded right to describe Ryder. He was too much of a man to be called a boyfriend, he is much too bossy to be called a partner and lover meant being intimate and we hadn’t been, yet.

  Katie watched one more cartoon before it was time to go to bed. “Come on Katie, baby, time to put our pyjamas on.”

  She yawned even as she opened her mouth to tell me she wasn’t tired. I hid a smile and waited until she sat up to turn the television off using the remote. I followed her slowly up the stairs; her little legs betrayed how tired she really was. While I helped her get ready for bed she chattered on about tomorrow and how excited she was to spend time with Ryder, I had to admit I felt exactly the same.

  Chapter Three

  Lexi

  The light streaming through my open blinds woke me up. Immediately the events of yesterday came to mind. While I’d helped Katie to dress ready for bed, I’d thought about Ryder, about his words to me, his actions and what he’d said to Julian. He'd protected me, no one had ever done that before, not that I’d needed them too, but still. I found I couldn’t pinpoint how I felt because I had so many emotions running through me. A night of sleep hadn’t helped me either. I still felt confused. Looking at the clock I saw it was seven already. Panic hit because Ryder said he was coming at eight and I wanted to make sure I looked good. What should I wear, my usual jeans and top, or skirt and blouse? I shook my head. I didn’t even know what we were doing yet and besides Ryder would get a shock if I dressed up.

  “Mummy,” I heard Katie call, and I relaxed. I needed normal and there was nothing more normal than my little girl. She was late waking up this morning; usually, she woke me up around six.

  “I’m awake baby,” I called knowing she’d hear me. I heard her bare feet padding along the floor before she pushed my door open and ran in giggling.

  “We’re going out with Ryder today.” She practically shouted at me.

  “We sure are.”

  “I can’t wait.”

  I knew that feeling. “Me neither.”

  She curled into my side for a quick hug and pulled away to cup my face. “I love Ryder; he loves blueberry muffins like me.”

  Grinning, I pushed her hair from her eyes. “He loves you too.”

  “I know, Mummy.” She said seriously. “He loves you, do you love him?”

  Do I love him? He could be the ugliest person in the world and I would still love him. I couldn’t tell her this because who in their right mind fell in love with someone who up until last night had never even kissed me.

  “Mummy?”

  “Everyone loves Ryder baby. Now shall we get dressed because he’s bringing breakfast?”

  “I love Ryder’s breakfasts.” She exclaimed as she started jumping on my bed in excitement.

  “Of course you do, it’s a breakfast of sugar and sweet treats, who doesn’t love that?”

  “Daddy doesn’t.”

  “Your daddy doesn’t like to eat sweet things.”

  “Blueberry pancakes are my favourite.”

  “And Ryder’s,” I added.

  “That’s why I love him; he always brings my favourite things.”

  “I know now jump down so we can brush our teeth and get dressed.”

  “Ok.”

  I smiled. “You’re such a good girl.”

  At a quarter to eight, we were both sat on the sofa dressed and waiting for Ryder. Katie was both bouncing with excitement and watching cartoons while I finished my second cup of coffee. Movement caught my eye, and I looked at the front door, with the curtain open, I had a clear view of Ryder and it was enough to stop my breath. He’s wearing a red shirt which hugged his torso, showing off his amazing body, his jeans looked worn and fit him like a second skin showing off his muscular thighs. I couldn’t wait until he turned around so I could get a look at his bum, the sight might actually make me swoon. As I unlocked the door, I let my eyes wander over his face and his lazy smile nearly had me melting into a puddle. My face filled with heat
at being caught ogling him. He grinned while he pushed the door open the rest of the way and pulled me to him.

  “Good morning honey, did you sleep well?”

  “Yes.” I nearly stammered. It was a struggle to rein in the desire I felt for him. Just his presence was making me think of us in bed together. Graphic images ran through my mind and I shook myself mentally to clear them. I read too much erotic romance because some of those thoughts were X-rated.

  “I didn’t, all I could think about was you and that kiss. Fuck, it was hot.” He whispered in my ear causing a shiver to run all the way to my toes. I wanted to kiss him, I find myself staring at his lips. His face moved closer to mine, but I heard footsteps and I turned in time to see Katie coming towards us.

  “Ryder, did you get breakfast?”

  “Sure did darling.”

  He let me go with obvious reluctance and I moved to close the door behind us.

  “Blueberry pancakes?” Katie asked.

  He held out a bag to her, and she squealed. “I couldn’t let my favourite girl down could I?”

  Katie grabbed the bag and ran straight into the kitchen. I could hear her opening the cupboard getting herself a plate.

  “We’ll finish this later Lex.” He promised and kissed me lightly on my lips before he followed Katie.

  I let out a breath, I was right his bum did look good, really, really good. I pulled myself out of the daze it sent me in and hurried to the kitchen because if I wasn’t quick enough they’d eat all the food and I’d have to settle for toast. Ryder smiled as I perched on a stool at the counter. He placed a cup of coffee in front of me and an empty plate before he took a seat beside me.

  “Butterscotch pancakes?” He offered.

  “They are my favourite, thank you.”

  “They look yucky Mummy.”

  I turned to look at my daughter and laughed. Her mouth was purple from the berries and she was frowning at my plate.

  “They’re nice, why don’t you try some?”

  She shook her head. “There’s nothing hiding in them. They’re boring.”

  “They aren’t boring.”

  “They do look a bit boring.” Ryder agreed with her and they shared a look before ramming more pancakes into their mouths.

  “What are we doing today?” I asked Ryder once all the pancakes were gone.

  “I’m thinking the park and a picnic?”

  “Sounds perfect,” It’s what I had planned yesterday before Julian ruined things.

  “The weather looks warm and we can take a ball.”

  I love football, but I’m not very good at it.

  Katie frowned. “Tammy said I shouldn’t play football because it’s a boy’s game.”

  My anger is instant and my grip tightened on my cup. How could Tammy be so bloody stupid? Katie has always loved football, it’s pretty much the only sport she does like and for Tammy to say it’s only for boys is ridiculous. Before I can find words to explain that she’s wrong Ryder spoke.

  “Katie, do you have fun when you play football?”

  “Yes.”

  “As long as you have fun you can play whenever you want. Did you know that girls play professionally?”

  She shook her head. “They do? Are they good?”

  “Yes, as good as the boys are. They win trophies too. Anyone can play football baby.”

  Katie smiled and I could see she believed him. “Ok.”

  I wanted to wring Tammy’s neck for saying what she did. I’ve always given Katie a choice in what she wants to do and that won’t change.

  “Besides, you need to teach your mummy because every time I see you play in the garden she falls over.” He winked at me and I blushed in embarrassment, I can’t believe he’d seen me do that.

  “I don’t always fall over,” I muttered.

  He snickered knowing I was fibbing.

  Katie giggled. “Yes, you do Mummy, but it’s Ok because we will help you, won’t we Ryder?”

  “Yeah, we will.” He agreed with her before he turned to look at me. “It doesn’t matter how many times you fall, baby, I’ll always be around to pick you up.”

  I didn’t miss the double meaning of his words or the seriousness of his expression.

  “I know,” I said truthfully. I had no doubts about it. Whether I was on the floor because I missed kicking the ball or because my ex-husband had again used our daughter to hurt me, he would be there.

  “Eat up and we’ll go. It’s pretty chilly still so you’ll need coats.”

  “Ok Ryder,” Katie said with a mouth full of food. I'd usually remind her not to talk while she’s chewing, but I let it go because quite frankly I couldn’t tear my eyes away from Ryder.

  “I’ll drive. Which park do you want to go to?”

  We had two parks in the village. One of them had a big red slide which Katie loved. She told him that before I could.

  “The red one?” he questioned.

  “It’s the one on Compton road.”

  “Ah the red slide, I should have guessed that one.”

  “The slide is huge and mummy lets me go down on my own now.” She informed him with a grin before jumping down from where she sat to go into the living room.

  “You let her go down it on her own? I bet you panic the whole time don’t you?”

  “Yes, every time.”

  “That’s what makes you a good mother Lex, that and a thousand other reasons.”

  His compliment warmed me. “I’ll go and make sure she has her coat on.”

  “You do that and I’ll clear up.”

  “I can do it later.” I protested. “You brought breakfast; it’s not fair for you to clear up too.”

  “Lex, I’ll do it.”

  I opened my mouth to argue, but the finger he placed on my lips silenced me.

  “Don’t argue because you won’t win. Go and check on Katie.”

  I turned to do as I’m told resisting the urge to lick my lips when I’m suddenly pulled back by my arm. “I almost forgot,” Ryder told me before his lips touched mine. My thoughts dissolved as his tongue swept into my open mouth to caress my tongue. My knees went weak, and I lifted my hands to his shoulders gripping tightly to keep myself upright. When the kiss ended I was gasping for breath, he was too. I rested my cheek on his chest and waited for my body to calm down.

  “Sorry baby, I only meant to give you a brief kiss, but I can’t help myself. As soon as our lips touch I want to rip all your clothes off. I’m lucky I have some kind of control although if we’d have carried on much longer I don’t know if I could have pulled back.”

  “I feel the same way.”

  “I know.” He grinned ripping a breathless laugh from me.

  “Arrogant much?”

  “No, baby I’m not arrogant I just know you and besides your body is still trembling.”

  “So is yours,” I pointed out.

  “Yes, it sure is and I’m so hard I could cut diamonds.” He said with a grimace.

  “Maybe you should let me go, that might help.”

  “Holding you or not Lex I’ll still be hard. I get hard just looking at you.”

  “I think that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.” I teased.

  “Prepare for more nice words because even after we’ve made love a dozen times I still don’t think I’ll be able to control myself.”

  “Wow.” I’ve never felt so desirable in my life.

  “Stop looking at me like that else we’ll have to explain the birds and the bees to Katie sooner than we should.”

  I dropped my eyes. He was right, I wanted to rip his clothes off and take him into my body. I knew he could read the thoughts on my face and normally I would be embarrassed, but I wasn’t. “I’ll get Katie ready.” My voice was husky, and I coughed to clear my throat.

  “Good idea. I could do with a cold shower but I’ll make do with some fresh air, I’ll meet you at the car.”

  I nodded. I took a few deep breaths before I called Katie an
d when she didn’t answer I went in search of her finding her watching cartoons. “What happened to getting your coat?”

  “Sorry Mummy. I love this one.” She said pointing at the television.

  “Ryder’s waiting outside.”

  “Oh cool.” She turned off the TV and grabbed her coat. “Come on Mummy, let’s go.” She squealed as she ran out the front door towards the car.

  I pulled my coat and scarf out of the cupboard under the stairs as well as Katie’s football and headed out the front door locking it behind me. As I got closer to the car, I saw Katie leaning forward singing along to whatever song was playing on the radio, Ryder had a huge smile on his face and his gaze on her was filled with warmth. My heart stuttered. The love he has for my daughter is plain to see. He’s been a part of our life for a long time, things have always been friendly between us, but with Katie, he’s really bonded. I love that she has that with him and that she is so comfortable with him. I know if anything serious did happen between Ryder and me, and it’s pointing that way, she will be happy. She questioned if her dad still loved her when he remarried. She’d seen all of her friend’s mums and dads together and thought it was her fault me and her dad didn’t live together. I suppose every child worried it was their fault, but it hurt me that she did. With Julian married to Tammy, she’d thought he couldn’t love her anymore and that he didn’t have enough love for them both. Julian and I explained that it wasn’t true and eventually she settled and she seemed happy now. I hoped she always would be.

  ****

  Football is a chore. I’ll never be good at it. I don’t know how Katie has so much talent because she definitely doesn’t get it from either of her parents. Julian doesn’t like getting dirty. I looked down at my grass-stained knees with a grimace; I had a feeling my bum was just as bad. What was wrong with me? I’m not usually so clumsy but give me a football and I turn into a complete klutz.

  “It’s not that bad Lexi, you only fell twice. From what I’ve seen that’s a new record.” Ryder laughed at the disgust on my face. “Usually it’s three or four. Come to think of it I think I’ve seen you do it five times when it’s been windy.”

  “I’m not that bad.” I protested feeling grumpy now.