The Mending

by Susan Lantz Simpson

  “Vows?” Her voice squeaked. She gave a little cough. “You don’t know how bad it can get.”

  “I know it was bad enough to land you in the hospital. I don’t want you to be sick, Malinda, but your condition doesn’t scare me off. I want to help you, to take care of you.”

  “No man wants to take on extra household duties with his own chores and work. It would definitely be a burden.”

  “Why don’t you let me decide that?”

  Silence.

  “I decided.” Timothy sliced into the silence. “I can handle that.” He didn’t know if Malinda would slap his hand away or not, but he reached over to squeeze one of hers. Despite the warm evening, her hand was cool. He urged the horse off the road and into a neighboring field so he could focus on Malinda. Her furrowed brow had smoothed and a tiny smile curved her lips upward ever so slightly, but tears shimmered in her dark eyes. He gently squeezed her hand again.

  “Y-You don’t know . . .”

  “I know what I feel.”

  “I feel guilty enough that my daed has to spend so much money on my medicine. I wouldn’t want someone else to take on that burden. Besides, I should find a way to help with those expenses.”

  “Malinda, I am not worried about the money. Gott will provide. Just think, maybe you will be so happy it will cure your disease.”

  “That would be a miracle.” Malinda smiled a smile that lit her face and made Timothy smile in return.

  “Could we . . . could you give us a chance? We can take it slow, if you like.” That wasn’t especially to Timothy’s liking. If he had his way, they’d be published at the next church service and be married as soon as she could sew her dress and food could be prepared. In fact, he wouldn’t mind being like the Englischers who got married at the courthouse without all the fuss, but that wasn’t their way. “Can I court you, Malinda, or can you honestly say you don’t care at all for me and want me to leave you alone?” He crooked an index finger under her chin to raise her face. His own pleading image reflected in her eyes.

  “I, um, I . . .” Her voice dropped so low it was barely audible. “I would be lying if I said I didn’t care.”

  Timothy’s heart soared higher than the crimson setting sun. He tried to reel it back in, but it flew ever higher.

  “I’d like to keep seeing you,” Malinda continued, “but if I get sicker, I may change my mind.”

  “If you get sicker, I will be there for you.” Before he could stop himself, he leaned down to brush her soft cheek with his lips. For just a moment, Malinda leaned her head against his shoulder. That’s right where she belongs, he thought. He’d like to wrap his arm around her in a tight embrace and never let her go, but that would have to wait. Now he had to make sure she always wanted to stay by his side. He couldn’t let anything or anyone change her mind.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Fall crept into Southern Maryland early that year. The heat and humidity slithered away practically overnight, leaving the air crisp and fresh. Soon Malinda would be spending her days helping Saloma put up apple butter, applesauce, apple pie filling, apple jelly, and any other apple treats they could concoct. The trees had been loaded with McIntosh, Stayman, Winesap, and Rome apples that would be ready for picking at different intervals. The house would carry the sweet, spicy scents of apples and cinnamon for days.

  Malinda loved clear autumn evenings. She could wrap a shawl around her shoulders and sit on the step to gaze at the bright stars twinkling in an inky sky. The round, orange harvest moon would be so big she could almost reach up and pluck it from the sky. When the chill seeped through the shawl and into her bones, she could retreat to the cozy blue armchair near the woodstove and knit until her eyes grew too heavy to hold open. She loved knitting or crocheting hats, gloves, scarves, afghans, or whatever else she could think of for gifts for freinden and family. This year she needed to think of a special gift for Timothy.

  The thought of Timothy brought a smile to her lips and heart. She truly did care for him but knew she was still holding him somewhat at arm’s length, afraid to let him get too close lest he bolt when her disease flared up. She feared, though, her heart had already dragged her deeper into the relationship than she had intended to go.

  Timothy had abided by his promise to take things slowly, but he’d been coming by more frequently. Sometimes it was a quick stop on his way home. Other times they sat together or took rides on Saturday evenings after her family had gone to bed. All except Atlee, who occasionally visited with freinden. Malinda sometimes wondered if Atlee would ever become serious about a girl and settle down. He was such a fun-loving guy, but he had a heart of gold. At least he hadn’t fallen into the clutches of Becky Zook. Of course, Sam spent most of his free time with Emma. Malinda expected them to be published any Sunday now.

  By September’s end, trees already blazed gold, orange, and red. They’d turned early this year. Evening’s chill spread into the morning and midday. Even afternoons no longer warmed up so much. Winter might try to sneak in early, but Malinda hoped not. She loved the fall best of all the seasons.

  Shortly after tidying up the kitchen following the noon meal on a cool Thursday afternoon, Malinda slipped outside to sweep the front porch. She lifted the broom high to knock down intricate, zigzagging spiderwebs stretched across corners of the ceiling. The feathery webs, some empty and some holding fat, dark spiders, seemed to fill nearly every nook and cranny. Malinda liked studying the various patterns and designs and almost hated to knock them down. Nobody liked walking face-first into a spiderweb, though, and Mamm nearly screamed in terror whenever a spider crawled into the house, especially one of the big, ugly ones with hairy legs. There wasn’t much Mamm was afraid of, but she couldn’t abide spiders of any shape, size, or color. Most likely the webs would be rebuilt by tomorrow.

  Malinda had been inside nearly all week helping Mamm put up the last of the apples, so getting outside in the nippy air provided a pleasant change. They’d made three apple pies and several dozen apple cinnamon muffins in addition to all the preserving. The rest of the apples would be stored for eating. Malinda liked apples, but didn’t care to see another one for a while. All the peeling and slicing had made her thumbs grow stiff and her hands ache. She would enjoy all the apple butter and applesauce this winter, though.

  Wedding season was upon them, and several couples had already been published. Of course, weddings could occur throughout the year, but most couples still waited until fall, when the harvesting and canning had been completed. Sam and Emma had yet to be published, but Malinda had a strong hunch the announcement would be forthcoming at the next church service. Something about Sam’s sly smile led her to believe he was up to something. She wondered if Sam and Emma would live with her parents or if they had their eye on some place of their own.

  Land had become more and more scarce in these parts, especially with the Englischers trying to snatch up every piece of farmland they could to build housing developments. Houses on top of houses. Malinda would not like to live in a house where she could lean out her window and touch her neighbor’s house. She liked space. Thinking of space, surely Emma wouldn’t want to live here cooped up with all these rowdy buwe. Personally, she thought it might be fun to have another girl around. A girl to talk to—besides Mamm, of course—would be rather nice. But Emma and Sam should have some time for the two of them before kinner started arriving.

  The crunch of tires on the gravel interrupted Malinda’s battle with the spiderwebs. It was probably some Englischer turning around or maybe looking for fresh produce. It never ceased to amaze her how many people thought green beans and peas and strawberries grew all year long on Amish farms. Crops grew at the same time on Amish soil as on Englisch soil, except many Amish had greenhouses to extend the growing season a bit. Of course, they did still have broccoli, cabbage, greens, squash, and pumpkins, but they usually sold them at the market now, not at roadside stands.

  Malinda turned to glance over her shoulder at the approac
hing vehicle, broom still raised in attack mode. She gasped and nearly lost her hold on the broom as the shiny red car drew closer. It wasn’t as if she’d never seen a sports car before. Englischers in the area drove all sorts of vehicles, from trucks to long vans with three or more seats to cars so tiny they could almost fit inside the trunks of the larger cars. And she had seen all sorts of vehicles pulled on trailers to the nearby racetrack. But something about this gleaming car screamed, Look at me. I’m special! The tinted windows prevented Malinda from seeing the occupants.

  Suddenly aware she’d been staring with her mouth hanging open and the broom raised as if she planned to use it for a weapon, Malinda clamped her mouth closed and lowered her broom-wielding arm. She didn’t know if she should keep looking toward the car or scoot inside the house. Since the car had driven so close now, it would appear rude to vanish into the safety of the house. Maybe she could offer directions and send the person on his or her way.

  Before she could form another thought, the driver’s door opened. Music so loud it must have rendered any occupants of the car completely deaf blasted out. The music died abruptly just before a man unfolded himself and stepped out into the brisk afternoon sunshine.

  “Malinda?” he called. “Malinda Stauffer?”

  How did this Englischer know her name? She knew very few Englischers besides a few of their neighbors, their regular produce customers, their Englisch drivers, and Dr. Nelson and his fraa. Who could this man be? If he moved out of the direct sunlight that was blinding her, she might obtain a better look.

  The man straightened his shoulders and stood quite tall, though not as tall as Timothy. He stepped forward a few paces, putting him in a small patch of shade. A lock of sandy hair fell over his forehead, and he quickly brushed it back with a swipe of one hand. Malinda gasped. The broom clattered to the cement porch floor, striking her shoulder on its descent. She flinched but didn’t cry out in pain. “Dr. McWilliams?”

  “Malinda! It is you. I hoped I made it to the right house. And it’s Todd. Remember?”

  “H-how did you find me?”

  “I’ve got my handy dandy GPS. I plugged in the address I got from your hospital records, and voilà! I must admit, the GPS wasn’t as helpful once I reached this last road.” He nodded toward the paved road he had just left. “But I persevered and made it to the right place.”

  “Wh-what are you doing here?”

  “Didn’t you get my letter a few months ago?”

  Malinda nodded. Her brain couldn’t form a single coherent thought to convey to her mouth.

  “You didn’t answer it.”

  “I-I didn’t think a response was necessary.”

  “Ah, Malinda, you wound me!” He slapped a hand over his heart.

  At first Malinda thought the man was serious, and she prepared to apologize. Then she caught the gleam in his eyes and knew he had spoken in jest. “What are you doing here?”

  “Am I not welcome?”

  “I, uh, of course. I guess so.”

  “Don’t you remember in my letter I said I had a conference to attend in Baltimore in the fall? You did read my letter, didn’t you?”

  She nodded.

  “Well, it’s fall, and here I am.”

  “Baltimore is not exactly close by.”

  “No, but what’s an hour or two to drive?” The doctor gave Malinda a broad smile and a wink.

  Malinda considered an hour or two a long trip—much too far to travel by horse and buggy. Baltimore had to be at least seventy-five miles away, but that shiny red car could probably make the trip in record time. She self-consciously shifted her weight from one black sneaker–shod foot to the other.

  “Aren’t you going to invite me in?” Todd McWilliams strode toward the front porch.

  This was definitely a man accustomed to being obeyed, to getting his way. But Malinda couldn’t invite him inside. Mamm had left right after the noon meal to take a casserole to an ailing neighbor. Daed and her older bruders were working, and her younger bruders were in school. It wouldn’t be at all appropriate for her to entertain a male guest in the home alone.

  “Uh, we can sit here on the porch.” Malinda bent to retrieve the broom and propped it in the corner beneath the spiderweb she’d been battling. She resisted the urge to rub her throbbing shoulder for fear the doctor would want to check it out. She turned back to face Dr. McWilliams, who stood watching her every move, threatening the composure she was struggling to maintain. “Please, have a seat. Would you like some iced tea or water?”

  “No, thanks. Come sit with me, Malinda.” He dropped onto the porch swing and patted the space beside him. That errant lock of hair fell over his forehead again, lending a boyish look to his handsome face.

  Ignoring the doctor’s gesture, Malinda inched over to the wooden rocking chair and perched on the edge. There was no way she would squeeze into the space next to him and be pressed so closely against his thigh. Just the thought of such nearness, such familiarity, sent a flush clear up to the roots of her hair, she was sure. She primly arranged her dress and tucked her hands beneath her legs to stop their quaking. Whyever did the man show up here?

  “So tell me how you’ve been.” Todd sat back in the swing and set it gently swaying with the toe of one foot.

  “I-I’ve been fine. I haven’t had any major issues.” Did he drive all the way here to inquire about her health? Did he follow up so thoroughly with all his patients?

  “I’m glad to hear that. Of course I’m interested in your physical health, but I wondered if you’d given any thought to what we discussed.”

  “What we discussed?” Malinda gulped down the lump of dread that clawed its way up her throat.

  “You surely remember our discussion about your remaining in Ohio.”

  “But I am here, as you see.” Malinda stalled for time and searched desperately for a way to change the topic. If willing would make it so, Mamm would be trotting up the driveway to rescue her from this uncomfortable situation. Uncomfortable? She almost chuckled. How about disturbing or impossible or maybe even frightening?

  “I do see, but that doesn’t make me very happy. I’ve missed you. Have you missed me even a tiny bit?” He gave Malinda a crooked little grin and, to illustrate his point, held a thumb and forefinger up, separated by a tiny space.

  What should she say? Should she admit her life had been pretty busy and she hadn’t given the doctor much thought except for the qualms she had experienced at the arrival of his letter? If she hadn’t been sitting on her hands, she’d surely be wringing them. Could she possibly be in a more awkward position? “I-I’ve been very busy since I returned home.”

  Todd quirked an eyebrow. “Oh?”

  Apparently he thought Amish women sat around all day and watched the grass grow. “Jah. There is much to do with a large family.” Malinda lowered her gaze to her lap.

  “I believe you did mention you have a lot of brothers.”

  “Jah.”

  “So you have lots of cooking and cleaning and things?” At Malinda’s nod, he continued. “And I guess you have to take all that laundry down to a stream and beat it on a rock.”

  Malinda’s head snapped up. “We aren’t exactly that primitive, Dr. McWilliams.”

  “I’m only teasing, Malinda. I know a little more about the Amish than that. I have had other Amish patients before.”

  Did you pursue those women in such earnest, too? Malinda swallowed her question and tried to breathe normally. Where was Mamm?

  “Wouldn’t you like a little break from all this?” With a sweep of his hand, he indicated the house and yard. “You could spend a couple of days in Baltimore with me.”

  “With you?” Now she knew for certain that a flush was staining her cheeks. How could he even suggest such a thing?

  “Sure. My conference is just one day—tomorrow. Then I would have the two weekend days before returning to Ohio. We could visit the aquarium, some museums, the Lexington Market. Who knows? Maybe I can talk y
ou into returning to Ohio with me. You already know some people there. We could live near the hospital—”

  “Wait!” Malinda jumped to her feet and set the rocking chair thumping crazily. The nerve of the man! He had everything all planned out and expected her to follow docilely along. “That is all preposterous!”

  “Oh, Malinda. Sit down and calm yourself. We can talk about this and come to an agreement, I’m sure.”

  “You don’t understand. This is my home.” She ignored his order to sit.

  “Homes can change. Some people move around often.”

  “Not me. This is where I intend to stay. I just got baptized and joined the church.”

  “A mere triviality. You can go to church anywhere. I told you. I would attend a Mennonite church with you—when I’m not working, of course.”

  “I have no intention of leaving my church, my home, my family.”

  “Well, come visit Baltimore with me. After a couple days together, I believe you’ll change your mind.”

  “I wouldn’t, and I won’t be going to Baltimore or anywhere else with you, either.”

  “Be sensible, Malinda. Who better to help you stay well and to see you through flare-ups besides me?”

  “I have a doctor here. Dr. Nelson is very capable.”

  “For a country doctor, perhaps, but I have all the latest advances and treatments right at my fingertips.”

  “I have Gott and the support of my family and community. To me, that’s even better.”

  Todd McWilliams rose and took a few steps closer to Malinda. Too close, as far as she was concerned. She couldn’t back up any more without falling over the rocking chair. The doctor towered over her. Malinda didn’t feel sheltered by his large presence, as she did with Timothy. Instead, she felt threatened and more than a little frightened. Her heart thundered, creating a roar in her ears. She scarcely realized her hands were clutching fistfuls of her dress at her sides.

  Malinda gasped when Todd bent and kissed her cheek. “You’re a sweet girl, Malinda. Think about what I said. Think about me.” He reached into his pocket and produced a small card. He yanked one of her hands free, placed the card on her palm, and folded her fingers around it. “Here’s my number. I know you can use a phone when you need to. As soon as I hear from you, I’ll be back to get you before you can bat one of those beautiful brown eyes.”