Heart of Rockies 03 - More Than a Feeling

by Sara Richardson

  She wanted to believe that. She wanted to believe a lot of things about him. But right now she couldn’t think straight. “I have to go,” she gasped, unable to fill her lungs with air.

  And before he could stop her, she ran blindly back to the lodge.

  Chapter Nineteen

  When Sawyer was eight years old, there was a mystery in the Hawkins household that he’d taken it upon himself to solve. One morning, when everyone filed downstairs for one of Mom’s gourmet breakfasts, they found a kitchen window broken, unlocked, and open.

  Right away Mom had flown into a panic, forcing Dad to call the police. But nothing was missing from the house, so they filed a report, fixed the window, and moved on with life. Everyone except him, of course. The desire to know what had happened burned inside of him and inspired him to launch his own investigation. He started by examining the window, which, judging from how the glass had fallen, had definitely been broken from the outside. But, if it had been an intruder, they would’ve taken something…Mom’s three-carat diamond ring that she always left on the ring stand above the kitchen sink, maybe? It would’ve been so easy. Someone could’ve swiped it in two minutes and gotten out of there. But the diamond ring was still there. Which made Sawyer watch his two older sisters carefully.

  They’d sure acted shocked, feeding Mom’s panic with their dramatic cries.

  “Who would break into our house?”

  “I don’t feel safe here anymore!”

  But both of his sisters had moved on from the incident a little too easily, he’d noticed, when not a half hour after the police left, Samantha was giggling on the phone. That moment happened to be his first clue that there hadn’t been an intruder at all. After she’d hung up the phone, he’d casually asked her who she’d been speaking to.

  Lucky for him it had been Courtney, the only one of her friends to ever even notice he was alive. She spent so much time at their house that he’d developed a little brother relationship with her, too. So after Sam left the room, he called Courtney right back.

  Growing up with two sisters had taught him one very important thing about women: they tell each other absolutely every detail about everything that has ever happened to them. It’s almost as though they can’t think something without voicing it to another female friend, who will then help them dissect it over and over and over, coming to no logical conclusion, but somehow dealing with it in the process.

  Courtney had answered the phone right away, and Sawyer, who still sounded like a girl back then, did his best to mimic his sister’s voice. “Just wanted to remind you not to tell my parents about last night,” he half whispered to cover up the cracks in his voice.

  “Are you kidding?” Courtney had squealed. “I’d never tell them. I’m just glad they didn’t catch you sneaking back in! You’d better remember your key next time you do that.”

  Case solved. He never ratted out Sam. It was enough satisfaction to know what had happened, that he’d figured out something when the grown-ups couldn’t. That was the minute he knew he’d be a police officer someday. Even back then he’d always exceled at deductive reasoning—taking multiple observations and evidence and facts, whittling them down to form the most logical conclusion.

  Now whenever he dealt with a female suspect, he always interviewed the people closest to her. Especially other women. Always.

  That’s why he’d ended up at Ben and Paige’s ranch approximately twenty minutes after Ruby had run away from him. Since that first incident when she’d nailed him in the balls with a rolling pin, he’d been gathering the facts.

  Fact: Ruby had panic attacks that obviously resulted from a traumatic experience, most likely with a man, given the way she’d reacted to him a number of times.

  Fact: She went to great lengths to keep her past a secret, even to the point of threatening to leave the ranch if he went through with the background check.

  Fact: Out of all the Walker Mountain Ranch women, Paige seemed to have a special bond with Ruby. Which made her a key witness in unraveling the woman’s mystery.

  So Sawyer parked his Tahoe on the side of the Nobles’ five-car garage and hopped out, following a cobblestone path to the front door.

  Paige’s husband, Ben, was made of money—he came from a political dynasty in Texas—but you wouldn’t guess it from the looks of their ranch house. It was modest, compared to most of the million-dollar homes in the area. Still a beautiful log-and-slate structure, but definitely on the small side. If he had to guess, he’d say about three thousand square feet. On the other side of the driveway was a guesthouse for Paige’s therapy clients. In addition to running a successful cattle operation, the Nobles also ran an equine therapy program, helping people with special needs experience the backcountry on horseback. They were good people. Trustworthy as anyone he’d ever met, and he suspected Ruby thought so, too.

  He stepped onto the porch and stood in front of a solid wood door with a mountain scene carved into it. A wildflower wreath hung in the center with a sign that read WELCOME.

  Sawyer knocked, wondering if anyone would even be able to hear with that door being so solid.

  But a few seconds later the door swung open and Ben’s sister, Julia, appeared in her frilly wheelchair, decorated this time with ribbons in the spokes. When she was sixteen her legs had been crushed in a car accident, and she’d never regained the ability to walk. But it hadn’t seemed to slow her down any.

  “Sawyer!” She greeted him with her trademark spunk. “What a surprise!” Oliver, her trained golden retriever, trotted to the open door, giving him the third degree with his nose.

  “Hey, pooch.” He lowered to give the dog a good scratch behind the ears. “I’m the one who’s surprised.” Julia had moved back to Dallas last year after living at the ranch with Ben and Paige for a time. Last winter she’d gotten engaged to her childhood sweetheart at her brother’s wedding reception. The memory lured out a grin. That right there was proof that happy endings existed. After the hell she’d been through, Julia and Isaac had found each other again. If she could overcome everything, so could Ruby.

  “Isaac and I came for a visit.” Julia wheeled herself aside and waved him in. “A quick visit,” she emphasized, then beamed that bright, fun-loving smile. “Is everything okay? Are you here on official police business?”

  “Technically, no.” Although he was playing detective tonight. “I need to talk to Paige. Is she around?”

  “She sure is.” Julia wheeled herself down a slate-tiled hallway, gesturing for him to follow. Oliver pranced beside Julia, obviously convinced that Sawyer was harmless.

  “We were just sitting down for dinner, actually. You should join us.”

  He’d already eaten dinner with the kids, but that had to have been three hours ago now. Besides, you couldn’t walk into the Nobles’ house and not eat a steak. “Sure. Sounds good.”

  He followed Julia through the hall, across the expansive sitting room, and into the country kitchen that reminded him of something he’d seen in a European chalet when Kaylee used to make him watch HGTV.

  “Sawyer…” Paige was setting a platter of steaks on the custom-made table, which consisted of two antique doors fused together with metal. She set the platter next to the vegetarian grilled eggplant, of course. It was beyond him how she lived on a cattle ranch and still never ate meat.

  Her eyes narrowed as she straightened and faced him. “Is everything okay?”

  Typical. People saw a cop and they automatically think something terrible has happened. Not that he frequently swung by to visit Paige and Ben or anything. He could see why she’d be surprised.

  “Everything’s great.” After what’d happened with Ruby earlier, his smile felt plastic. Things were not great. Great would be him and Ruby all tangled up on the couch back at his place right now. Instead, he was forced to revert to his detective skills to figure out what kept setting her off.

  “Um…” He looked around. Julia was busy setting colorful plates around the
dinner table. With the potential threat neutralized, Oliver had given up his post and was sprawled underneath the table.

  Might as well get on with the questioning. Not like he cared much if Julia overheard. She was headed back to Dallas soon, anyway. He looked back at Paige. “I wanted to ask you a few questions about a certain baker at the Walker Mountain Ranch.”

  The woman’s eyes lit with an unrestrained excitement. “About Ruby? Of course! Anything! Ask away!” She quickly jogged to a huge china cabinet and took out another place setting, handing it to Julia. “Stay for dinner. That’ll give us plenty of time to talk.”

  “I’d love to.” Didn’t appear he had a choice, anyway.

  “We’ll be ready in about ten minutes,” Paige said. “Hopefully. As long as that husband of mine and his friend come in from the stables.” She hurried to the counter and snatched her phone. “I’ll text him and tell him we have company.”

  “I’m not in a hurry.” Not like he had a hot date with Ruby or anything. And investigations typically required a hell of a lot of patience. So instead of pressing Paige for answers right away, he sat across from Julia.

  “How’re the wedding plans coming?” he asked, figuring that’s what engaged women loved to talk about.

  But Julia waved him off. “We’re not really planning. We booked a trip to Tahiti for a destination wedding in the fall.” Her dark exotic eyes glistened. God, she looked happier than he’d ever seen her. Even without a real wedding. Or maybe because she didn’t have to put on a real wedding.

  “How’d your mom take that news?” he asked. He couldn’t resist. Gracie Hunter Noble was a piece of work, the classic southern matriarch.

  Julia laughed. “I told her after it was booked. And we didn’t get the trip insurance.”

  “She called Ben sobbing and asked if a marriage was recognized by the church if the wedding wasn’t in the United States,” Paige chimed in from across the room.

  That cracked him up. Knowing Gracie, it was easy to picture.

  “She is still coming,” Julia said, though she didn’t look exactly thrilled. “And so are Ben and Paige. That’s the extent of the guest list.”

  “Sounds perfect.” It really did. He and Kaylee had done the whole big wedding thing at the top of Aspen Mountain. Thirty grand and a few years later they were divorced. Seemed like kind of a waste.

  “So, Sawyer—”

  The door flew open and cut Paige off. Ben sauntered in, followed by his badass ex-Navy buddy Isaac, which got Oliver all riled up. The dog darted over to Isaac, whining and licking his hand.

  “Oliver,” Julia cooed. “Come.” The dog obeyed right away, skulking back to his spot under the table.

  “Hey, baby, didn’t miss dinner, did I?” Ben captured Paige in a bear hug and dipped her, then kissed her like they were about to fall into bed.

  Across the table from Sawyer, Julia rolled her eyes. “And this is exactly why we aren’t staying for a week,” she complained. “God. It’s worse than having two overly hormonal teenagers around.”

  Sawyer laughed. And averted his eyes.

  “You want me to kiss you like that?” Isaac asked his fiancée, already lowering to his knees in front of her chair.

  In response Julia mouthed the word “later” with some pretty significant tongue action, and everyone in the room laughed.

  The woman glared at Ben and Paige again, but she was smiling. “I’d never make out with you in front of my brother.” They didn’t make out, but Sawyer didn’t miss the way Isaac moved a chair closer to his fiancée and held her hand under the table. A warm ray of hope radiated in his chest again.

  Ben seemed to get his sister’s hint and released Paige. “Sawyer. Hey, man. Good to see you.” He walked over and clapped him on the back. “How’s the transition going?”

  “So far, so good,” he said, but it came out flat. He was supposed to be focused on his move to Denver, on starting over, but he hadn’t thought about it since the morning he’d encountered Ruby in the kitchen…

  “You could always stay, you know.” Paige came to the table, too, her cheeks slightly pink and a smitten grin on her face. She sat next to Ben and started to dish out food. “You don’t have to move away.”

  No. He didn’t have to, but that’s what he’d wanted for so long. “You sound like Aunt Elsie and Avery,” he teased.

  Her snarky grin made it look like she decided to take that as a compliment. “I just can’t imagine anyone choosing Denver over Aspen.”

  “What’ll you be doing in Denver?” Isaac asked.

  While he dug into his steak Sawyer politely answered all their questions about his new job, doing his best to sound like he couldn’t wait.

  When the conversation lulled, Paige targeted him. “So what do you want to know about Ruby?” she asked, grinning and bouncing her eyebrows.

  He set down his fork, the steak turning into a rock in his gut. Ben, Isaac, and Julia looked on with interest, and he guessed it wouldn’t hurt to talk in front of them. “Just wondering if you know much about her. What her story is.”

  The woman’s smiled dimmed. “Uh. Well.” She seemed to look at Ben for help, but he only shrugged.

  “No. Not really. Why?” she finally stuttered out.

  Yeah, right. Paige was obviously uncomfortable, which meant she knew a hell of a lot more than she was letting on. It was obvious someone had hurt Ruby. A foster parent? Or someone else? Not knowing tortured him. He pushed away his plate. “We’ve hung out a few times. But tonight we were arguing about something, and she completely shut down. Freaked out. I don’t understand what happened.”

  Paige shared another look with Ben. Yeah. She definitely knew something.

  “The thing is,” Sawyer went on before he lost his chance. “It wasn’t normal. Her reaction. I went to take her arm so she wouldn’t walk away from me, and you would’ve thought I’d punched her.”

  Paige’s mouth tightened into a frown.

  Julia wheeled herself back from the table. “Hey, Isaac and Benny, we need more wine. Let’s go pick out some of the good stuff from the cellar.”

  “We’ve got good bottles right over there.” Ben waved an arm toward the wine rack on the counter.

  Julia’s sigh condemned him. “Seriously, Ben. Were you raised in a barn? Let’s give Paige and Sawyer a minute.”

  “Oh. Right.” A look of understanding dawned. He quickly pushed back from the table and followed Isaac and his sister out the door with Oliver on their heels.

  “What do you know?” Sawyer demanded as soon as the door slammed shut. He was done guessing, done stepping around the issues. Because the truth couldn’t possibly be any worse than what he was imagining in his head and he couldn’t take it anymore.

  Paige sighed. “I don’t know much. And I’m pretty sure it’s not my place to say anything.”

  She might’ve said it wasn’t her place, but she sure as hell looked like she wanted to tell him. Most likely out of concern for Ruby. All she needed was a little push…

  “I like her. A lot.” She had to know his motives were good. “But there’s this wall. It’s like she’s hiding something from me. And maybe if I understood it, I’d know how to help her get past it.”

  The woman seemed to silently weigh her options. Finally she pushed her plate away and leaned over the table. “She hasn’t told me anything. Not really. But she hinted that she was in a relationship not long ago. And the guy sounded like bad news.”

  Anger clouded his vision, shrouding everything in a colorless haze. “What’d he do to her?”

  “I’d guess he pushed her around,” she said quietly. “But I don’t know for sure. It’s just…she still seems so afraid of him.”

  Rage burned through him, tightening his joints, setting his skin on fire. What he really wanted to do was go throw a chair through a window, but he held himself still and forced a peaceful expression. “Thanks. That helps.”

  “What’re you gonna do?” Paige asked as if she could see past
the calm façade. She knew him too well.

  He’d like to find the son of a bitch and let him pick on someone his own size. But that wouldn’t help Ruby. Wouldn’t help his cause, either. He couldn’t give her a reason to fear him. “I guess I’ll have to find a way to undo the damage he did.” To convince Ruby she’d be safe with him.

  If she’d give him a chance, he’d always keep her safe.

  Chapter Twenty

  Ruby sat still and silent, gripping the steering wheel so tight her knuckles ached. Though she’d pulled into her driveway ten minutes before, she hadn’t been able to unfreeze her muscles enough to walk inside the house. Her skin still smoldered where Sawyer had curled his fingers around her arm. After she’d run from him, Elsie intercepted her in the kitchen, chatting through the events of the day. For a half hour Ruby had managed to pretend her stomach wasn’t roiling from the way Sawyer had grabbed her arm like he wanted to wrench her back to him.

  That was how it’d always started with Derek. He’d grab her and yank her into range…

  The memory sparked again, igniting her body in a blaze of fear.

  Sawyer was different. She knew that. But that didn’t mean she had any power over the physical escalation of panic she’d been conditioned to feel. It overpowered rational thought, putting her body at war with itself, unleashing adrenaline and a sickening rush of nausea.

  Ruby fought her way out of the car, gasping in lungfuls of the chilled night air. The ground felt unsteady beneath her, so she leaned against the car to catch her breath, to set herself right.

  It was her fault Sawyer had gotten angry in the first place. He never got angry. He had the reputation for being the biggest pushover on the Aspen police force. Every woman in town knew that when Sawyer pulled you over, you only had to turn on the tears and he would let you off with a rather gentle warning. But tonight she’d pushed him. Insulted him.

  She hadn’t meant to yell, but someone had to speak up for the kids. They didn’t deserve to be treated that way, like suspects instead of guests. Her whole life she’d been looked at like trash because of the way Mama had lived, because her clothes were ratty and unwashed. Never once did anyone look past that—past the circumstances she’d been born into to see that she might have something to offer the world. No one except for Ruby James, that was. Her elderly neighbor was the only person who’d given her that glimpse of hope.