The Bellator Saga: The First Trilogy (Dissident, Conscience, and Sojourn)

by Cecilia London

He shook his head, amused. “Now you’re just making legal concepts up.”

  “I want to be with you,” Caroline said. “I want to show you how I feel about you.”

  “I appreciate that,” Jack said. “But despite my reputation, I am a gentleman. And a man who wants his conquests to remember what he did to them the next morning. We aren’t going to sleep together even if you say you want it to happen. Plus I’m not entirely sure you’ll be awake for very long once you lay down, and I am definitely not into having sex with someone who’s unconscious.”

  “You’re a jerk,” she mumbled.

  “Probably.” He steered her into bed. “But I’m still going to stay here and keep an eye on you.”

  “You just wait.” She started to sink into the sheets as he pulled off her heels. “You get in this bed and you won’t be able to stop me from ripping your clothes off.”

  Jack laughed. “I’d like to see that.”

  “I’ll do it,” Caroline garbled, suddenly realizing how drunk she was. She leaned into her pillow and let the alcohol take her into slumber.

  * * * * *

  When Caroline woke up her head was pounding. She heard the shower running and it took her a minute to remember who else could be in her room. She tried to sit up but her stomach lurched and she quickly laid back down again. A few moments later Jack came out of the bathroom, a towel around his waist.

  “Well, well,” he said. “How’s our drunken princess feeling today?”

  Keeping her face buried in the pillow seemed like a phenomenal idea. “Like hell.”

  He starting rubbing her back. “Can I get you anything?”

  “Some Advil would be nice. Is it really bright in here?”

  Jack retrieved a bottle of water from the mini fridge and put it on the nightstand. “Nope, it’s just you. The lights are off.”

  “What time is it?” she asked.

  “You’ve got a couple of hours before you need to do anything important, if that’s what you were wondering.”

  “What happened last night?”

  “You want the highlights or the lowlights?”

  “Aren’t they pretty much the same?”

  “Pretty much. You tried to go drink for drink with the Speaker. Do you remember?”

  Caroline winced. “Yes.”

  “You tried rather halfheartedly to seduce me.”

  “I vaguely remember that. Did it work?”

  “Nope.”

  “What did I do?”

  “You said you were going to fuck my brains out and then promptly lost consciousness. I was worried for a minute until I realized it was because you were so tired.”

  Caroline lifted herself up until she was resting against the headboard. She grabbed the bottle of water, unscrewing the top and placing it back on the nightstand as her stomach twisted again. She wasn’t quite ready for liquids yet. “I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be. It was cute.” Jack tugged at a random string on his towel. “You called yourself my girlfriend while you were trying to work your magic on me.”

  Caroline couldn’t look at him. “Aren’t I?”

  “I certainly hope so. Am I your boyfriend?”

  “Sure.”

  “Did you think we were something else?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Caroline, we’re in a relationship. We’re exclusive. Even if we’re not advertising it.”

  “We seem too old to be using that terminology.”

  “What other words would you like to use?”

  “None of the other words seem to fit.”

  “Then just go with the words you used.” Jack kissed her forehead. “You are my girlfriend. And a wonderful one at that.”

  “Even though I practically passed out in your lap?”

  “That was cute too, in an ‘I’m glad you don’t have alcohol poisoning’ kind of way.”

  Caroline rubbed her eyes. “Please tell me I didn’t do anything stupid in public. Aside from grabbing your ass in the bar.”

  “You did try to feel me up while you were clinging to me in the elevator.”

  She flopped face first onto the bed. “Hopefully we were in there alone?”

  “There’s a charming little elderly couple from Austria you may want to avoid if you see them in the lobby.”

  She buried her nose in her pillow again. “Fuck.”

  “You lose your inhibitions when you’ve been drinking, don’t you?”

  “Sometimes. In this case, obviously yes.”

  Jack started rubbing her back again. “It’s fine, sweetheart.”

  “I guess I should be grateful I didn’t cause some sort of international incident,” Caroline mumbled. “Is Bob mad at me?”

  “He was concerned for your welfare.” Jack hesitated. “I think he was afraid I’d take advantage of you when I brought you back upstairs. He almost stopped me.”

  She remembered them arguing in the bar. “All this protectiveness is getting to be a tad smothering. I’ll talk to him.”

  “No,” Jack said. “Ellen set him straight. Just pretend it didn’t happen.”

  “I can’t do that. I’m getting sick of all this bullshit.” She gave him a closer look. “We really didn’t do anything last night?”

  “We did not.” He winked at her. “Your rather adventurous virtue remained intact. For at least a few hours.”

  If she had the energy, she would have smacked him. “So we’ve been sneaking around the last few days and the one night you stay here the entire time, I get nothing?”

  “I cuddled you all night. Mostly to make sure you were still breathing.”

  “But no sex.”

  “No.”

  “That’s disappointing.”

  “Not for me. I may be a selfish asshole but I’m not going to sleep with a woman who won’t remember it the next day. You were barely coherent.” He stared down at the towel again. “And I like holding you.”

  “You could have had sex with me. I wouldn’t have minded.”

  “That doesn’t make it right. We can make up for it tonight if you manage to recover by then.”

  Caroline pulled herself out of bed, groaning with every step toward the bathroom. “Unless you have a good remedy for a killer hangover, I wouldn’t hold your breath.”

  * * * * *

  Bob handed Caroline a cup of coffee as he sat down next to her on one of the benches in the lobby. “How are you feeling today?”

  Caroline blinked. The lobby was very bright. Luckily she hadn’t run into any adorable Austrian grandparents. Yet. The Speaker of the House looked as refreshed as if he’d just gotten back from a three week vacation. The man could hold his liquor and had demonstrated as much on many different occasions. She tried not to curse at him.

  “Do you have to talk so loud?” she asked.

  Bob put his arm around her. “That bad?”

  “Not good. What did we drink last night?

  “Mostly Laphroaig,” he said. “I think it was the last shot of Macallan that pushed you over the edge, though. Probably shouldn’t have let you mix different kinds of whiskey like that.”

  “You look like you did okay with it.”

  He patted his waist. “I’ve got an iron stomach. We Scotsmen have strange gifts when it comes to our native spirits.”

  Caroline grimaced. “How many shots did I do?”

  “You went shot for shot with me until about fifteen, I think.” Bob squeezed her shoulder. “Everyone else bowed out long before that. Be proud of that accomplishment.”

  Clearly all the drinking she’d done in the past year had improved her tolerance. She wasn’t sure that was something to be pleased about. “How far did Grimes get?”

  He chuckled. “That asshole? Maybe five. He’s a pussy.”

  She tried not to laugh. “You know how I feel about men using words like that but in his case it’s completely appropriate.”

  “Grizzly Wagner made it to eight, I think.”

  “Anyone else? I feel lik
e there were some staffers there too.”

  “They did one of each and went out clubbing or something. Kids these days. They don’t appreciate the good stuff.”

  She closed her eyes. “I vaguely remember all of this.”

  “You were in rare form last night. Even at your most intoxicated you were still spouting off baseball stats and shooting the shit about Chicago.”

  “Not sure if I’m all that proud of my behavior. Unless I get a trophy or something.”

  “You don’t get a trophy,” Bob said smugly. “Because I won.”

  “Participation ribbon?”

  He patted her back affectionately. “You’re a lot of fun, Caroline. I’m glad you came along. Even if you’re not quite at your best this morning.”

  She frowned at the cup in front of her, which had cooled off a little. “I don’t drink coffee.”

  “I know you don’t. Trust me, you’ll want this. I had the baristas put a couple of secret ingredients in there for you.”

  “There’s no heavy duty tea over there?”

  “That won’t help. Just drink it. It’ll absorb most of the alcohol.”

  “I don’t think that’s how coffee works.”

  “You’re going to get all scientific on me? This isn’t a debate. Drink it,” he ordered.

  Caroline sniffed the contents of the cup. It did smell good. “Is this how you cure your own hangovers?”

  Bob sat up a little straighter. “You don’t see me hiding from the sun and cringing at loud voices, do you?”

  “Point taken.” She took a small sip. It tasted better than she thought it would, with just the right amount of sugar. “Thanks.”

  “No problem.”

  She set the cup down beside her. “I hear you were defending my female integrity last night.”

  Bob clenched his fists. “I was just looking out for you. The rest of the group had been drinking wine most of the night. McIntyre didn’t come prowling over to our table until you were half conscious.”

  “Because he was worried about me.”

  “That defies reasonable belief.”

  “He wasn’t prowling, Bob. He was concerned.”

  “Bullshit. He saw an easy target and he went after it.”

  “He’s my boyfriend.” Caroline almost stumbled over the phrase. The statement sounded a little odd. They really had to think of a better way to refer to each other.

  Bob did not share her good humor. “For now.”

  “Nothing happened,” Caroline said.

  He waved his hand at her. “I don’t want to know the details.”

  “I mean it. I tried to coax him into it and he said no. He turned me down because of the condition I was in.”

  “I see.”

  “I trust Jack,” Caroline said. “Completely.”

  “I don’t.”

  “Why not?”

  “He doesn’t appear to be well suited to you.”

  “My opinion is the only one that counts.”

  “You need to tread lightly with him, sunshine. He’s not-”

  “He’s not what?”

  “Just be careful,” he said. “Don’t rush into anything.”

  “What did you say to him on the plane?” Caroline asked.

  Bob gave her a hard look. “That was a private conversation.”

  “You had to know that he would tell me he talked to you. Fess up.”

  “I told him that if he hurt you, I would kill him.”

  Caroline gritted her teeth. His protectiveness was flattering, but over the top. “Please tell me that wasn’t what you actually said.”

  “I didn’t threaten actual homicide. Maybe more of a career-oriented demise.”

  She couldn’t keep the irritation out of her voice. “Robert-”

  “Don’t start in with that.” He cut her off before she could speak again. “You call me Mr. Speaker and this conversation is going to go downhill very quickly.”

  “You’re the one throwing your political weight around, not me,” she snapped. “Perhaps some emotional distance would be appropriate right now.”

  “Caroline, he is not someone you want to be heavily involved with. Not at this point in your life.”

  She stared at him. “Have you been plotting with Christine?”

  Bob folded his arms. He was close to losing his temper. While he did a good job of keeping the majority party in check, he and Christine had a tenuous if not outright adversarial relationship. Caroline was still trying to figure out why he’d agreed to endorse her in her Senate race. Bringing Christine into the conversation was a sure way to set him off, and Caroline had done it on purpose.

  “No.” he said. “Representative Sullivan and I do not have anything other than a professional association, and even that’s a stretch. But you and I…”

  “Yeah, I know,” she said. “We’re different.”

  His expression softened. “We are. You have a generous heart and I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

  Caroline was getting damn tired of Christine’s machinations and Bob’s bellicose approach. “Why are the two of you trying so hard to discourage this?”

  “Because we love you,” Bob said. “And because we know what you’ve been through.”

  “I’m not a child.”

  “I am well aware of that. But you trust too easily. Too quickly.”

  “You make me sound like an idiot.”

  Bob put his arm around her. “That is not what I think of you. You know why I want to keep you safe.”

  Caroline took a huge gulp of coffee. Sometimes she hated feeling like she was an idealistic, naïve pet, even though she knew Bob and Christine meant well.

  “I appreciate your concern,” she said. “But I don’t think Jack is going to hurt me.”

  “I hope not. John McIntyre is not the kind of man to get too attached to.”

  “I am aware of his history. And I respect your opinion, Bob. But you have to let me make my own choices. I wouldn’t be with him if I didn’t think there could be more.”

  “I know that. He may not. I can’t help it if I’m a little protective of you.” Bob cleared his throat, and when he spoke his voice was unsteady. “You’re like a daughter to me, Caroline.”

  She swallowed hard. He’d never said it to her face before, though she’d long suspected it. She was one of the very few who could appreciate the significance of those words, and it was enough to render her speechless.

  Bob squeezed her shoulder harder, after taking a deep breath. “I recognize and respect that I don’t have much say in how you live your life.” He gave her a smile. “If that were the case we’d be having some serious conversations about your disappointing party affiliation.”

  Caroline kissed him on the cheek. “I’ll be fine. No matter what happens.”

  “And I’m here for you regardless of the outcome,” Bob said. “You read me?”

  “Yeah, I read you.” She finished her cup of coffee and tossed it in a nearby garbage can. “Let’s go to that bakery down the street and get some challah. Maybe it will absorb all the booze I’ve got in my system.”

  * * * * *

  Caroline looked out the window of the plane. Not that there was much to see. It was dark out and they were in the middle of the Atlantic.

  “Are you still tired?” Jack asked.

  “A little.”

  “I’m glad you decided to sit next to me on the way home.”

  “Me too. I had a lot of firsts this trip.”

  “And what were those?”

  “First time getting drunk in a foreign country.”

  “Might not need to try to repeat that,” Jack said.

  “First trip to a kibbutz.”

  “Not many of those in the States.”

  Caroline smiled shyly at him. “First time alone with you in a hotel room.”

  Jack tucked her hair behind her ear. “That was a highlight for me too.” He paused. “You meant all the sex, right?”

  Caroline cuffed him
on the arm, even though that was exactly what she’d meant. “Pervert.”

  “It’s not like this trip was the first time we slept together.”

  “There’s something illicit about doing it in a hotel.”

  “And in a hotel shower,” Jack pointed out. “And on a hotel floor.”

  And several other places, if memory served. “I liked all of that.”

  “You insatiable woman.” Jack weaved his fingers through hers. “May I hold your hand?”

  “Since you’ve already made your move, sure.”

  “Nothing gets by you.” He laughed. “Awfully quiet in here.”

  “I think everyone else is sleeping.”

  “Maybe we should too.”

  “I’d like to talk,” Caroline said. “I wish we could have spent more time together this week.”

  “Me too. Any pressing issues when you get back to D.C.?” Jack asked.

  “Not really,” Caroline said. “Jenny and I agreed it was best to take the weekend to recover from our jet lag. I always seem to do worse coming back than going.” She pulled her armrest up and scooted closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder. “Is this okay?”

  Jack put his arm around her. “Fine with me. Do you want to come to Philadelphia for the weekend?”

  “You don’t have any commitments?”

  “I told my chief of staff to keep this weekend free. For the same reason as you.”

  “You wanted to ask me earlier, didn’t you?”

  “Maybe. I didn’t want you to feel like you had to change your plans for me.”

  Caroline didn’t want to admit that she probably would have. “I’d need to stop at home first, but it’s doable.”

  “Good. I’ll drive us up so you can’t escape early.”

  “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

  Jack kissed her cheek. “I want you all to myself,” he whispered. “I may even lock up your phone once we get there so you aren’t tempted to do any work.”

  Caroline eyed him warily. “You don’t have anything big planned, do you? I’d prefer to relax.”

  “I just want to spend time with you,” he said quietly. “We can do whatever you want.”

  She brought her arm around his waist and leaned in closer. “I like that idea.”

  “Sweetheart, aren’t you concerned about what the other members of the delegation will think with you curled up against me?”

  “They can think what they want,” she murmured. “It’s not like they haven’t figured it out already. And if they want to make a big deal about it, screw ‘em.”