Clay took her hand in his. “Then look at this as a chance to make up for all that lost time.”
“But what if”—her voice caught—“I forgive her and she leaves again?”
“Then you’ll have done the right thing. And I’ll be here for you to lean on.”
❧
Warmth swept through Rayna as Clay took her hand in his and they stepped inside the church. Without her saying anything, he’d dressed casually in khakis, a turquoise shirt, and tennis shoes. No pearl buttons or hat. He looked uncomfortable and Rayna could have kissed him for his effort.
“I’ll walk you to the office then wait in the sanctuary if you need me.” Clay moved his hand up to tip his hat and met air. A slow grin tugged at his mouth.
Again, Rayna wanted to kiss him. Just for looking so good. And for sticking with her—baggage and all.
They neared the office. Her parents waited in the lobby.
“Rayna, I’m so glad you agreed to come.” Her mother patted her arm.
Rayna stiffened.
What should she call her mother? She didn’t deserve to be called Mom. Dayle? The Adulteress? The Woman Who’d Ruined Their Lives?
Brother Timothy stepped out of his office. “Hello.” He offered his hand. “I’m. . . Dayle Newcomb—is that you?”
The light of recognition dawned in her mother’s eyes. “Timothy Andrews. Look at you—a preacher. I never would’ve guessed. Not in nine million years.”
“Dayle and I went to high school together, but we ran in rather different crowds.”
“I was the biggest flirt, but I didn’t hang with the guys who only came out after midnight.”
Rayna stifled a gasp. Who was her mother to judge anyone?
“Clay’s well aware of my testimony.” Unflustered, Brother Timothy grinned. “But Rayna’s rather in the dark. You see, I didn’t always live my life on the straight and narrow. Let’s just say the Lord saved me, not only from the fires of hell, but from drugs and alcohol as well.”
“Which gives you a more powerful testimony,” Clay drawled.
“There’s Adam. Daddy, why don’t y’all start? Adam and I will be in shortly.”
Mom updated the pastor on former classmates as Rayna stalked away.
As the office door closed behind them, Adam blocked her path. “We need to do this for Dad.”
“I know.” Rayna closed her eyes. “It can wait. Just let me take a few deep breaths. I want to talk to you.”
Clay cleared his throat. “I’ll be in the sanctuary.”
Rayna waited until he was gone. “Why have you been so standoffish?”
“You didn’t want to talk that first morning, so I gave you space.”
She hugged him. “I don’t need space. I need my brother back.”
“You never lost me.” He propped his chin on her head. “I remember more than you. I was six. I remember Lefty being around, playing with us. Then he disappeared the same time as our mother did. By my teens, I figured it out and asked Dad about it. I’ve been hiding the truth, trying to protect you for a long time.”
“I’m okay. Especially if I have you.” And Clay. “What changed your mind about Clay?”
“I figured you needed someone, and after getting to know him, I decided my childhood perspective of cowboys was skewed.”
Rayna pulled away to look at him. “I’m not sure I can do this.”
“Come on, sis.” He slung his arm around her shoulder. “We promised Dad. We’ll face it together.”
❧
Clay looked at the clock in the sanctuary. The session had lasted longer than Rayna’s. To the toes of his cowboy boots that weren’t on his feet, he longed to be in there with her. The least he could do was be there when she came out. He hurried out into the lobby and plopped in a wingback chair.
The office door opened. Dr. Landers wore worry like a well-fitting saddle as he exited holding his ex-wife’s hand. Rayna and Adam followed.
“We’d better go. It’s getting late. I’ll call tomorrow.” Rayna pecked her father on the cheek and ignored her mother.
Dr. Landers’s mouth tightened in a straight line, and he marched out the door, followed closely by Rayna’s mom.
Rayna gave her brother a quick hug. “I’m so glad you came.”
“Yeah.” Adam’s tone was dead. “See you tomorrow.”
Clay waited until Adam’s SUV pulled away and curled her into his shoulder as they walked to his truck. “What happened?”
“We aired all our dirty laundry, but nobody opened up. We kind of took sides—our parents against Adam and me.”
They stopped at his truck, and he hugged her. “Maybe your folks are embarrassed since your mom knows Brother Timothy.”
“She should be. I can’t believe she had the nerve to say anything about his past.”
“Brother Timothy’s been very open about it, and your mother was only expressing shock at the change.”
Rayna rolled her eyes. “We have another session next week after Christmas is over.”
“Speaking of which, spend Christmas with me?”
“I’d love to, but Daddy’s insisting we all gather at the house.” She shook her head. “I just can’t. Adam is joining Gabby’s family, and she invited me, too. I already said I’d be there.”
Forcing himself to let go of her, he opened the door, and she climbed in the truck.
“How about that evening?”
She smiled and his insides did a sideways bull twist. “I could probably manage to get away by then.”
❧
Christmas night at Durlene and Ty’s was a rowdy affair. Lacie and Mel arrived shortly after Rayna and Clay. The rustic home echoed the decorating style of the ranch with branding irons on the walls and rawhide curtain toppers. Twang was the order of the day—in music and speech.
Rayna missed her dad, but at least she and Adam were back to normal.
During the lively meal, talk of cattle, horses, and rodeos ruled. Clay did his best to include Rayna. Though surrounded by pleasant company, she obviously didn’t fit in.
Afterward, she and Lacie helped Durlene clean the kitchen then went to the den to join the men.
“You okay?” Clay whispered.
Shivers pricked her skin as his breath ruffled the hair at her ear. “I feel. . .”
“Like a swan at a duck pond.”
She laughed.
“Relax, everyone likes you. Especially me.”
“It was the most enjoyable day I’ve had in a while.” Warmth moved over her as he took her fingers in his.
“Let’s go outside.” Without waiting for an answer, he pulled her along to get their coats.
“It’s cold. Why?”
“You’ll see.”
The evening air chilled her as they stepped outside.
Something made a rhythmic clacking against the driveway. A large shape neared in the moonlight. A single alabaster horse pulled a white hansom cab.
“Thanks for driving her over, Ben. How’d it go?”
“Come May, we’re getting hitched.” Ben climbed down from the cab.
“Congrats. I’ll take it from here.” He helped Rayna into the carriage then climbed in beside her and put his free arm around her shoulders. “Warm enough?”
Boiling. “I’m fine. Where did you get this?”
“It came with the ranch. I almost sold it awhile back, but I’m glad I didn’t.”
“You made poor Ben work tonight? How’d he get home?”
“He left his truck here, and I drove him over to the ranch so he could borrow the rig to propose to his girl.” Clay pulled something from his pocket and held a ring box toward her. “Merry Christmas, pretty lady.”
ten
Rayna gasped. Her heart revved. “If that’s what I think it is, it’s a bit soon. We’ve only known each other three months. Even if we have spent a lot of time together.”
“Open it.” His eyes shone in the lights lining the drive.
Slowly, she lift
ed the lid. Sparkling green gems winked at her. Earrings. Her insides quivered with a war between relief and disappointment. “They’re beautiful.”
“A real nice clerk at the jewelry store helped me pick them out. Said emeralds are always good for redheads. And I like you in green. ’Course, I like you in anything.”
“They’re real?”
“Of course. I wouldn’t get my girl glass.”
His girl. She closed her eyes and pushed the box toward him. “It’s too much.” She’d only gotten him three inspirational western novels.
“Worth every penny.”
“But I didn’t spend that much on you.”
“Who’s counting? I love the books. Give me something to do in between customers on the days it’s my turn to work the desk at the ranch. I hate those days.”
“A few months ago you were in financial straits. I can’t accept these.”
“My straits are fine since I did my time as a male model and won the world title. And I insist.” He pushed the box back toward her then covered her hands with his. “Let’s go for a ride. Yah.”
The horse slowly clip-clopped along. Nestled against his side, she felt even warmer.
“Warm enough?”
Past boiling. “Yes.”
His lips lowered to capture hers, and the fire moved all the way down to her toes. Soft and gentle. And too short.
“Maybe next year, it’ll be a ring,” he mumbled.
❧
Rayna perched on the edge of the chair in Brother Timothy’s office. He must be the most patient man on earth. Other than Clay.
“Do you remember Jackie Melton?” Her mother raised an eyebrow.
“Homecoming queen. Dated that football jock. What was his name?” The pastor snapped his fingers. “It’s on the tip of my tongue.”
“They called him Moose. Anyway, I ran into her awhile back. They got married and had four boys. Can you imagine four boys?” Dayle’s expression clouded, and Daddy grabbed her hand. “I couldn’t even stick around long enough to raise one.”
Adam stood and stormed out, slamming the door.
Dayle’s face crumpled.
Daddy hugged her while Brother Timothy knelt in prayer.
Rayna stood to follow her brother.
“I made such a mess of things.” Her mother’s soft whimpers tore at Rayna’s soul. “I should have stayed and raised my babies. Lefty made so many promises, and I lost everything.”
“I wasn’t there for you like I should have been.” Daddy closed his eyes. “I shouldn’t have made you quit medical school. It was your dream.”
“That was no reason to commit adultery. I never should have left. I should have come back. But I knew I wasn’t worthy, and I knew y’all could never forgive me.”
Rayna scurried out, scanning the lobby for Adam but finding only Clay. She made a nosedive for his shoulder.
“Adam left. I assured him I’d get you home.”
“I think Lefty promised she could go back to medical school.”
“Sounds like he was a real scallywag. Come on. Let’s get you out of here. Think you’ve had enough for the night.” With his arm still around her, he turned her toward the door.
“Maybe he made it seem like her life was boring. Stuck at home with two kids, while his world was exciting, and he promised she could be a doctor. Her dream. It doesn’t excuse what she did, but I can see her side.”
“Good. I was hoping Brother Timothy could help.” Clay opened the door for her then nestled her against his side as they continued to his truck.
“Before things got tense in there and Adam stormed out, Daddy suggested we all have breakfast together Sunday morning. I’m not sure we’re ready for that.”
“Just give it time.”
❧
After Clay left, Rayna couldn’t sleep.
What do I do, Lord? How can I forgive her?
“I forgave those who nailed Me to the cross.”
The phone rang. Almost ten o’clock. Oh, don’t let it be anything bad. Please.
“Hello?”
“Just wanted to check on you,” Clay drawled.
“I’m okay.”
“You were so upset. I forgot to tell you that I’ll be out of town a few days.”
A chill settled in her chest. “Rodeo?”
“That, too. CWW signed me up for more commercials and three interviews on the radio. I’m gonna get it all done and be back at the Stockyards Friday night for the New Year’s rodeo. It’s the finals this year.
She’d actually forgotten about the campaign.
“I’d rather be with you, though. Nothing like kissing in the New Year with the woman who stole my heart. I’ve never had the pleasure before. Hate to miss out on it.”
“Oh Clay, I’m still not sure about us.”
“You don’t feel the same way?” Hurt echoed in his words.
“You know I do. But we’re still so different. The marriage thing doesn’t seem so daunting.” Since I met you. She closed her eyes. “But I’m still not sure about kids. You need someone who can share your dreams.”
“I’m praying about it. God will work out the details for us. Get some sleep.”
❧
Rayna’s office phone rang. An outside call. “Bradley & Associates. Rayna Landers speaking.”
“How are you?”
Clay’s voice filled her with renewed hope. “I’ve been treading water for the last twenty-two years and haven’t sunk yet.” She closed her eyes. “How’s the publicity trail?”
“Lonely. Did I dream it, or did you say something last night about getting used to the marriage idea?”
“I’ve thought about it some. I might consider it if the right guy came along.”
“The right guy, at your service. Keep praying. I love you, Rayna Landers.”
Her breath caught. “And I love you, Clay Warren.”
The line went dead, and she hung up.
In love with a cowboy. How did this happen? Well, if she was going to love a cowboy, she needed to make peace with the rodeo.
She hurried to Adam’s office and tapped on his closed door.
“Come in.”
“Hey, do you know where to get a ticket for the Saturday rodeo at the Stockyards?”
❧
Rayna made her way through the crowded lobby into the arena. The stands were packed. Oh, for a glimpse of dark curls.
“Hey darlin’.” His drawl set her heart aflutter, and his eyes sparkled. Chaps hugged his slim hips. An unwanted reminder of the bull waiting for him.
“Hey, yourself.”
“I’ve missed you, gal.”
“It’s only been three days.”
“I know, but I didn’t like it. Let’s not let it happen again. What are you doing here?” His arms came around her, and she felt like she’d made it home. His solid protective vest pressed against her heart. Please keep him safe.
“Came to see you, cowboy.”
“Let’s go somewhere to talk.”
“I don’t want to take your mind off the game.”
“Too late for that.”
She followed him out the back exit to a somewhat secluded alcove in the building.
“I’m thrilled to see you, but what are you doing here?”
“I figure I’m as comfortable at the rodeo as you are with photo shoots.” She sighed. “If we’re going to make this work, we both need to adapt.”
“Let me get this straight. The last time you were here you had an asthma attack. So you just decided to stop by?”
“I like to take the bull by the horns. And with you, life includes bulls.”
He cupped her face with tender hands. “You have no idea what it means to me that you’re willing to do this. But I want you to go home. Now.”
“No.” Rayna shook her head.
“Please don’t fight me on this.” Clay’s thumb traced her jawline. “I can’t concentrate on what I gotta do if I’m worrying about you in the stands.”
“You mean if I stay, you’ll be distracted, and you might get hurt as a result?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying. Now, please. Go home.”
She nodded. “Since you put it like that.”
“I really appreciate you coming. A lot.” He brushed his lips across her cheek then turned her toward a teenage cowboy. “Jeff, can you see the lady makes it to her car all right?”
Without a backward glance, she followed Jeff for several minutes before chancing a peek. Clay was gone.
She hesitated then turned back. “I forgot something.”
The teenager shrugged then followed as she hurried toward the arena. She sucked in two quick puffs from her inhaler and found the first available seat, hoping Clay wouldn’t spot her.
I can do this.
“Rayna.”
She nearly jumped through herself.
Lacie’s baby bulge was cutely covered in a sequined red blouse. “I thought I saw you with Clay. Why did he seat you over here? These are the worst seats in the house.”
“He thinks I left.”
“Why?”
“Clay doesn’t want me here.”
“Why did you come?”
“Because if things are going to progress between us—and I really want them to—I have to learn to love the rodeo along with the man.”
“I see.” Lacie tapped her chin with a scarlet fingernail.
“Will he see me if I sit here?”
“Probably not, but you won’t see any of the action either. Maybe that’s a good thing.”
“How are you? How’s Mel?”
“I’m waddling along. Mel’s just the way I like him. Wonderful, perfect, and healthy. He had a bad ride last week, but no injuries. I pray and keep all of my fingers and toes crossed every time he goes out there.”
Blond curls danced as she shook her head. “Us girls will never understand what it is about a bull that makes a man want to ride it. I quit trying to make sense of it years ago. You can’t change a cowboy. You gotta take him for what he is and love him with all your might.”
“How do you do it, Lacie? Spend year after year. . . What is it now, seven?” Lacie nodded and Rayna continued. “Seven years watching your husband—the man you love more than life itself—ride a creature that has the capability, motive, and drive to crush him.”
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