Healing the Doctor’s Heart

by Kirk, Cindy

  “Can we go out for pizza tonight, Daddy?” Chloe hopped up, taking her bowl to the sink without being asked. Another good habit she’d picked up from Kate.

  Joel took a sip of coffee. “Kate and I go out on Saturday night. Remember?”

  “Not tonight, Daddy. She has a date with Dr. Campbell.”

  Joel slowly lowered his mug to the table. “I’d forgotten.”

  It wasn’t that he hadn’t been warned. Kate had told him weeks ago that Benedict had invited her to attend a medical-society function with him and she’d accepted. No, he hadn’t forgotten, but neither was it something he dwelled on. If he did, he’d have to confront the fact that sooner or later Kate would find someone else. That was something he preferred not to think about.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Kate finished dressing and putting on her makeup while Chloe played happily in the living room. Even from her bedroom, she could hear the little girl singing to herself.

  As she applied her copper-colored lipstick, she smiled. These Saturdays that they spent alone had given her a chance to get to know Chloe…and to fall even deeper in love with her daughter.

  She knew she shouldn’t think of her in that way, but it came so easy now. It might not be right, but she wasn’t saying it aloud, so what did it hurt? After casting one last glance in the mirror, Kate retrieved her shoes from the closet and carried them with her into the living room. She dropped them next to the sofa.

  Although her toes had completely healed, she tried not to squish them any sooner than necessary.

  “I like your new shoes.” Chloe picked up one of the taupe peep-toe pumps with the pleated accent. “Very stylish.”

  Kate hid a smile. Those were almost the exact words Mitzi had used before she’d left the house to go shopping. Often when Chloe came over, Mitzi would stay and the three of them would spend the day together. But tonight was a big medical-society event at the Spring Gulch Country Club.

  Mitzi swore she hadn’t a thing to wear. Even though she was just going with Ryan—her words, not Kate’s—she’d headed out for an afternoon of shopping. That left Kate alone with Chloe for the afternoon, a fact that suited Kate just fine.

  In the past two months, she and Chloe had developed a relationship. The child sometimes came to her for advice, but most of the time they simply enjoyed doing “girl” things together.

  “I’m glad you like them.”

  “You’re going to look amazing tonight.” Chloe’s gaze settled on the black dress, with a swath of tan down each side, draped over the sofa. Her smile faded. “I just wish—”

  Kate looked up from the toenail she was painting a deep burgundy. “You wish what, sweetie?”

  Chloe chewed on her lip, then ducked her head. “I shouldn’t say.”

  After finishing the last nail, Kate put the applicator into the bottle and screwed it shut, then gave Chloe her full attention. “What have I always told you?”

  “That there isn’t anything I can’t tell you.”

  “Okay, then.” Kate gentled her tone. “Tell me what’s on your mind.”

  “I wish you were going with my dad,” Chloe blurted out. “He’s every bit as handsome as Dr. Campbell and you two have so much fun together. I don’t know why you’re not taking him. It just seems so…wrong.”

  It felt wrong to Kate, too. But dating other men was a survival thing. Joel didn’t love her. Oh, she knew he cared about her, but it wasn’t enough. She’d spent too many years coming in second to her sister to settle for any man’s leftovers.

  Dating other men made it feel like she wasn’t pining for someone she couldn’t have. She was still out there keeping her options open. It seemed ironic—and more than a little sad—that the only man she wanted was the one she couldn’t have. But that wasn’t something Chloe could understand. Heck, she barely understood it herself.

  “Your father—” Kate paused, praying for the right words “—loved your mom very much. He may not ever marry again. But I’ve never been married and one day I’d like to have a husband and children. So, while I admire your dad and enjoy his company, we’re just friends.”

  To Kate’s surprise, Chloe’s face took on a mulish expression. She crossed her arms. “You kiss him. Friends don’t kiss like that.”

  Heat rose up Kate’s neck. Two nights ago, when she and Joel had both thought Chloe was asleep, they’d decided to begin saying good-night while sitting on the sofa in his living room. That had been a big mistake. If Chloe hadn’t come in when she had, Kate had no doubt that she and Joel would have gone “all the way” instead of having a forced stop at second base.

  “Not casual friends,” she finally managed to choke out. “But your father and I are good friends.”

  Thankfully Kate was spared having to say more by the ringing of the doorbell.

  Chloe hopped up and raced to the front door. “I’ll get it.”

  Kate rose to her feet and followed behind. In a matter of seconds, the UPS guy had deposited the large box on the floor of the foyer and was sprinting to his truck.

  “What’s in it?” Chloe’s eyes sparkled with curiosity.

  “I don’t know.” Kate looked at the return address and sighed. “It’s from my mother.”

  “Is it your birthday?”

  Kate shook her head and lifted the box, relieved that it wasn’t as heavy as it looked. “Let’s open it and find out.”

  Chloe clapped her hands. “This is going to be so much fun.”

  For the little girl’s sake, Kate hoped it wasn’t a box of old sweaters. Because it appeared her mother had used a whole roll of packing tape, the child’s anticipation had built to a fever pitch by the time they finally got it open.

  “Toys,” Chloe squealed. “And pictures.”

  There was a letter inside, written in her mother’s perfect penmanship, telling Kate that because she would likely remain in Jackson Hole, she was sending the rest of her childhood memorabilia.

  Chloe pulled out the doll with brown, slightly askew pigtails and clasped her to her chest. “She’s beautiful.”

  “Her name is Lottie.”

  “Where are you going to put Lottie?” Chloe looked at a glass-topped side table and then in the direction of Kate’s bedroom.

  “I’ll probably pack her away.”

  Chloe’s face fell. Her hold on the doll tightened.

  “Unless—” Kate swallowed against the emotion welling up in her throat “—you’d like to have her?”

  A shriek burst from Chloe’s throat. “Yes. Yes. Yes. I want her. Are you sure? Can I really have her?”

  It had been an impulsive offer but it felt right. Lottie had been a special gift. She should be handed down from mother to daughter. “I can’t think of anyone who would give her a better home.”

  Kate had barely choked out the words when Chloe flung herself at her, wrapping her arms around her neck and hugging her tight. “I love you, Dr. Kate.”

  Kate wrapped her arms around the child—her child—and blinked back tears. “I love you, too, sweetheart.”

  She’d thought Chloe would jump back, eager to play with her new doll. But she settled her head against Kate’s chest, as if content to be simply held.

  Kate stroked the girl’s dark satiny hair and forced herself to breathe past the tightness gripping her chest. This was the first time she’d held her daughter this close since that last day in the hospital.

  Oh, Chloe, I’m so sorry. I should never have let you go.

  Chloe lifted her head and for a second Kate worried that she’d spoken aloud. But the little girl just smiled and laid her head back against Kate’s chest.

  When they finally broke apart, it was with none of the awkwardness Kate expected.

  “Are you ready for a snack?” Kate’s voice sounded husky, even to her own ears. She cleared her throat and tried again. “I have apples with caramel dipping sauce.”

  Because Joel wasn’t picking his daughter up until five-thirty, Kate knew it would be six-thirty or s
even before the two ate.

  “Can we finish looking through your stuff first?” Chloe dropped a kiss onto the top of Lottie’s head.

  “Sure.” Kate glanced at the large cardboard box, wondering what other old memories it held.

  As they dived into the contents, it appeared that the box held a little bit of everything. More dolls, though none as special as Lottie, a boatload of stuffed animals and lots of games. In the very bottom, there was a shoe box filled with pictures.

  Chloe’s eyes widened at the picture of Kate in her band uniform. “You were so cute.”

  Because orange and black had never been her best colors, Kate knew that was an overstatement, but she appreciated the compliment.

  “I want to look at them,” Chloe said with a pleading expression. “Can we, Dr. Kate? Please, can we?”

  The clock on the fireplace mantel said they had less than thirty minutes until Joel arrived to pick up Chloe. Ben was supposed to arrive shortly after.

  Still, she was dressed and ready to go, so there was time.

  After maneuvering the box by the sofa, Kate took a seat and Chloe hopped up next to her. She reached into the box and pulled out a picture. “This was me as a baby.”

  Chloe oohed and aahed over the pictures of Kate as an infant and toddler. Even though there were many pictures of both her and Andrea, the little girl never once commented on Kate’s sister.

  By the time they reached the grade school ones, Chloe was totally engaged. They moved on to the upper-elementary grades when Chloe looked at the picture in her hands and gasped.

  “You look just like me, Dr. Kate.” Chloe’s eyes were wide. “We could be twins.”

  Kate glanced at the picture the child held in her hands. She wore her favorite pink skating outfit and was staring unsmiling at the camera. A chill traveled up her spine. The child was right. It could have been Chloe in the picture.

  “Don’t you think we look alike, Dr. Kate?”

  The door had been opened slightly and Kate took full advantage. “Well, we both have dark hair. I could easily imagine you in that skating outfit. So, in that aspect we do look alike.”

  “No,” Chloe said. “Your face looks like mine.”

  “I guess I can see the resemblance in the shape of our faces.” Kate glanced at the clock, her veins humming with nerves. “Your father will be here any minute. Let’s look at the pictures when I was in junior high.”

  Kate shoved the ones where she was closest to Chloe’s age under the sofa cushion and pulled out another handful. By the time the doorbell rang, Joel was fifteen minutes late and they were laughing at pictures from the camping trip her family had taken Kate’s senior year.

  Without missing a beat, Kate dumped the rest of the pictures back into the shoe box and placed it in the cardboard box, between a Tickle Me Elmo and a Hungry Hippos game.

  “I want to look at more pictures,” Chloe whined.

  Kate brushed a strand of hair back from the child’s face and plopped a kiss on her forehead. “Next time you’re here, we’ll finish going through the box.”

  “Pinky swear?”

  Kate locked little fingers with the girl and squeezed as the doorbell rang again. “Pinky swear.”

  “Okay.” Chloe wrapped her arm around her new doll and headed for the door. “I can’t wait for Daddy to meet Lottie.”

  Joel meeting Lottie was one thing, but Kate didn’t want him being there when Benedict Campbell arrived. It felt awkward enough to be going out with another man after what she and Joel had shared, but being in the same room with both of them was something she preferred to avoid. She prayed Joel would make a quick exit.

  “Daddy, Daddy.” Chloe flung open the door. “Look what Dr. Kate gave me.”

  The child held out the doll for his inspection. He touched the yarn pigtails and smiled.

  Joel’s jeans, chambray shirt and boots were covered with a fine layer of dust. He looked rugged, manly and totally magnificent.

  He whipped off his hat. “I apologize for being late. It’s supposed to rain heavily for the next few days, so we pushed to get the house closed up. I lost track of the time.”

  “It’s okay, Daddy,” Chloe answered before Kate could respond. “Dr. Kate and I were busy. We didn’t even miss you.”

  “Is that so?” His lips curved up in a smile as his gaze settled on Kate. “You look nice. Are you going somewhere special?”

  “It’s the Jackson Hole Medical Society’s Annual Event at Spring Gulch.” Kate wished he’d remembered so she didn’t have to mention it.

  “That’s right.” His smile faded. “Too bad. I thought it’d be fun to go out for pizza.”

  Even though his expression was innocent, Kate wondered if he’d really forgotten about her date. “Perhaps another time.”

  “Dr. Kate and I looked at pictures, Daddy.” Chloe tugged on his sleeve. “In one of them she looks just like me.”

  Joel lifted a brow.

  “The shape of our face is the same and I wore a skating outfit similar to the one Chloe owns.” Kate waved a dismissive hand, wishing she could think of a way to graciously push them both out the door.

  “No, no, it wasn’t the dress,” Chloe insisted. “When I looked at the picture I thought it was me.”

  Joel rocked back on his heels. “This I have to see.”

  “It’s in the shoe box.” Chloe turned toward the sofa, but Kate caught her arm.

  “Sweetie, how about we show your dad the picture next time? I have company coming and—” Kate paused “—here he is.”

  Dr. Benedict Campbell paused in the open doorway. Impeccably attired in a dark suit and gray tie, his appearance a sharp contrast to Joel’s dusty work clothes.

  Ben was a little older than Kate, with hair more black than brown and gray eyes that could turn hard as steel in an instant. His build reminded Kate of Joel’s, tall with broad shoulders and lean hips. Unlike Mitzi, who detested the man, Kate enjoyed his company. But she wasn’t attracted to him.

  “Perfect timing,” she said with a smile. “Let me grab my wrap from the closet and I’m ready to leave.”

  Even though it probably wasn’t smart to leave Joel and Ben together, the evenings had started cooling down and she knew she’d regret not taking a coat.

  “I don’t know if you’ve ever met my daughter, Chloe.” Joel rested his hand on the child’s shoulder. “Chloe, this is Dr. Benedict Campbell.”

  “How do you do, Chloe?” Ben smiled. “Who is that you’re holding?”

  Chloe smiled shyly. “This is Lottie Rose. She was Dr. Kate’s doll when she was little. She gave her to me.”

  “You and Dr. Kate must be good friends to have her give you such a special gift.”

  Kate heard Ben’s comment from the other room and she groaned. Nothing good could come out of this line of questioning.

  “I love Dr. Kate very, very much,” Chloe said. “I wish she was my mom.”

  Kate stopped in her tracks, a lump rising to her throat. She blinked rapidly, trying to clear the tears that sprang to her eyes.

  By the time Kate reached the living room, Chloe was telling Benedict about the picture.

  “Sounds interesting.” Ben turned to Kate. “I’d like to see it.”

  “Dr. Kate can’t show it to us now.” Chloe shook her head. “’Cause she’s going to the party with you.”

  The tone in the child’s voice made it clear she didn’t approve.

  “I definitely want to see the picture,” Joel said. “Bring it to church tomorrow.”

  “If I make it,” Kate murmured.

  “You have to come,” Chloe wailed. “I’m singing in the choir.”

  Dear God, could this get any more awkward?

  “Time to leave,” Kate announced, shooing Chloe and Joel out the front door, then bringing up the rear with Benedict.

  Only when she was in his black Mercedes and they were gliding down the highway to the Spring Gulch Country Club did the tightness leave Kate’s chest.

>   Benedict turned off the highway and slanted a glance in her direction. “You and Joel Dennes seem very close.”

  Kate’s smile froze on her face. “He thinks of me as a friend of the family.”

  “Not if the look he shot me was any indication.” Ben laughed. “I felt as if I was going out with a married woman.”

  What could Kate do but laugh along with him? But the incident in her foyer set the tone for the entire evening. By the time Ben dropped her off at her house at a respectable 11:00 p.m., Kate knew something had to change.

  * * *

  Mitzi plopped down on the sofa next to Kate, an oversize coffee mug in her hand. “How was your date with Benedict Arnold, oh, I mean, Campbell?”

  “I don’t understand why you don’t like the guy.” Kate leaned back, cradling her cup between her palms. “He’s very nice. Reserved but nice.”

  “Arrogant.” Mitzi spat the word. “Egotistical jerk.”

  “Ben?” Kate frowned, trying to reconcile the man she’d spent the evening with and the one her friend described.

  “Lots of people think he’s an okay guy,” Mitzi grudgingly admitted. “He and I just aren’t a good combination.”

  Kate took a sip of coffee, finding Mitzi’s response very interesting. She hadn’t seen her friend show so much emotion over a man in, well, never.

  “How come you skipped church?” Mitzi lifted a perfectly tweezed brow. “Wasn’t Chloe singing?”

  “Her dad will be there.”

  “That doesn’t answer my question.” Mitzi slanted a sideways glance. “By the way, you look like hell this morning.”

  Kate raked a hand through her hair. This morning, she’d pulled on her oldest pair of yoga pants and a faded blue T-shirt that should have been relegated to the trash years ago. Although she’d brushed her teeth, she hadn’t bothered with makeup. “I couldn’t sleep.”

  “Well, that explains the raccoon eyes.” Despite Mitzi’s flippant tone, Kate sensed her friend was concerned. “Did something happen with Benedict? Because even though he’s the head of the group, I won’t put up with him—”