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Pinki Fallon – 1/13/00, 7:32pm
to: Harriet Greenbaum
David Crutton
cc:
re: Coke
I’ve done my best to find you because you need to know what I’ve just discovered. If I haven’t managed to see you before you read this, I’m sorry, because it would have been better face to face.
Please don’t ask who told me, but I heard that our Coke campaign isn’t exactly original. “IT’S IN THE CAN” was actually done for 7UP by a student team from Watford College. They’re called Kitty Bates and Jane Backer. I did some checking this afternoon and apparently Simon was at Tavistock Hegg last week looking at books. One of them was theirs. That was the day he showed you “his” idea. I had the book sent over so I could see any similarities for myself. The two campaigns are virtually identical. This couldn’t possibly be put down to coincidence. The only differences are the things that we’ve added since Simon left.
I also have a couple of e-mails that I received from Simon this afternoon. Placed alongside the work, I think they are pretty self-incriminating.
I know you will want to see the evidence for yourselves before you decide what to do. Personally, my mind is made up. I couldn’t possibly have anything more to do with this, and if it’s the agency’s decision to still present the work then I don’t think I could work here any more. Young teams have had their ideas ripped off for no reward for too long and this practise is sickening.
I know you might think that I’ve got an axe to grind and want to steal Simon’s job or something, but that isn’t the case. I feel gutted about this. I believed that Simon had a brilliant idea with “IT’S IN THE CAN” and it has been exciting to be part of its development this week.
For your information I am briefing the department to work through the night on a fallback. Given the hour, few people are around, so I’m not that hopeful of cracking it by the morning.
I’m sorry to be giving you such bad news. For the life of me, I wish I could spot a silver lining . . .
pinki_fallon@millershanks-london.co.uk 1/13/00, 7:35pm
to: brett_topowlski@millershanks-london.co.uk
cc:
re: Coke
I’ve looked at Kitty’s and Jane’s 7UP campaign and you were right. I’ve told David but he’s out and probably won’t respond until the morning. Whatever happens now, I want you to know that I wouldn’t be prepared to work for an agency that presented stolen work. If Simon keeps his job after this, I wouldn’t be prepared to work for a thief. Given how unscrupulous advertising is, I’ll probably be joining you in unemployment next week. Good luck with the shoot tomorrow . . .
brett_topowlski@millershanks-london.co.uk 1/13/00, 10:20pm (2:20am local)
to: liam_okeefe@millershanks-london.co.uk
cc:
re: night, night
Just back from getting jiggy with it. On the way we stopped by the Horne suite for a quick round of knock-down ginger. All we could hear through the door were the muffled wails of a man watching his career flush down the Royal Doulton. There was a lobster salad under a silver dome outside his door – obviously not taking deliveries from room service. Vin is tucking into it now – consolation for choosing not to bring the gorgeous Françoise back from the discotheque. Well, she was eleven and even Vin draws the line at twelve.
Pinki sent us a sweet e. Tell her she can play her Leonard Cohen CDs as loud as she likes and we’ll never take the piss again.
Time for bed, said Zebedee.
liam_okeefe@millershanks-london.co.uk 1/13/00, 10:31pm
to: brett_topowlski@millershanks-london.co.uk
cc:
re: night, night
Gratified to hear SH is taking it like a big girl’s blouse. No rest for us. Trying to do Coke and Pinki is encountering a thirty-storey writer’s block. We’re doomed, I tell you, doomed.
Friday, January 14th
brett_topowlski@millershanks-london.co.uk 1/14/00, 1:31am (5:31am local)
to: liam_okeefe@millershanks-london.co.uk
cc:
re: rise and shine
Horne is still sobbing. The typhoon has stopped and the sun is shining. The idyllic Mauritian sands look like Omaha Beach, 6 June 1944, but what the fuck, this is a great day to shoot an ad.
David Crutton – 1/14/00, 7:47am
to: Pinki Fallon
cc:
re: Coke
If you’re here, my office immediately. Bring all the work – everything that Simon, you and your department have done, as well as the 7UP campaign. I’ll make a side-by-side comparison.
Harriet Greenbaum – 1/14/00, 7:52am
to: Pinki Fallon
cc:
re: Coke
This is a disaster, Pinki. As soon as you get in, call me. I’d like to take a calm look before David sees it and any chance of a rational appraisal flies out the window.
Pinki Fallon – 1/14/00, 7:56am
to: Harriet Greenbaum
cc:
re: Coke
I’m here now. We didn’t go home last night. We’ve got a few ideas, but nothing that could be a pitch-winning campaign by high noon on Monday. Come and see me now and then we’ll do David. He’s already e’d me . . .
Zoë Clarke – 1/14/00, 8:35am
to: Lorraine Pallister
cc:
re: screaming fits
David is in his office with Pinki and Harriet and he’s going fucking apeshit!!!!!!!! He’s chucking stuff at the walls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It’s something to do with Coke!!!!!!!!!!! I can’t work it out but he’s going to kill Simon when he sees him!!!!!! I’m not kidding – he is going to KILL him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Knew there must be a bonus to getting in this early!!!!!!!
David Crutton – 1/14/00, 8:49am
to: Pinki Fallon
Harriet Greenbaum
cc:
re: Coke
I’m sorry I went off the deep end. I appreciate that you are only the messenger, Pinki. But if you reckon that was angry, just watch me when I get hold of Horne.
I’ve thought about this now. There is an obvious and simple solution. Hire these two girls. Have them start immediately and give them full credit. It’s the only way we’ll get to present what is a very good campaign and keep from besmirching your precious conscience, Pinki. What do first-jobbers get these days – 15k? Offer them twenty and they’ll chew your hand off at the elbow.
Pinki, you have my permission to call Letitia Hegg and get their signatures on a contract.
Even if they don’t take the bait, my inclination is to present anyway. We can argue that the elements that have been added to their idea make it different. If it gets out and we have a PR disaster to deal with, hopefully we’ll have the Coca-Cola business to mitigate the embarrassment.
And if this course of action brands me a common thief and leads to the resignation of a senior female member of the Creative Department, well, I can live with that.
By the way, if Horne or Westbrooke try to contact either of you, do not talk to them. I don’t want the former to get wind of his fate and “accidentally” board a return flight to a country that has no extradition treaty with the UK.
Pinki Fallon – 1/14/00, 9:03am
to: David Crutton
Harriet Greenbaum
cc:
re: Coke
I will try my best to hire Kitty and Jane. They have an excellent book anyway, and if you are genuine about owning up to them and crediting them with the Coke work, I believe this is a fair solution. Letitia isn’t at work yet so I’ll e-mail her next. Hopefully it will be the first thing she deals with.
If for some reason we can’t get them to come here and you still decide to go ahead with “IT’S IN THE CAN,” I will have to consider my position. The theft of ideas is too big an issue to ignore . . .
David Crutton – 1/14/00, 9:07am
to: Pinki Fallon
cc:
re: Coke
Are you trying to threaten me? That is funny.
&n
bsp; pinki_fallon@millershanks-london.co.uk 1/14/00, 9:13am
to: letitia@tavistockhegg.aol.co.uk
cc:
re: Kitty Bates and Jane Backer
Hi Letitia.
We want to offer Kitty and Jane a job at Miller Shanks. There is a gap in our resources that we need to fill urgently and we think they have the flair that we’re looking for. We would like to offer them £20,000 each. I know this is slightly above average, but we do think they are a bit special.
Could you convey the news to them as soon as possible and let me know their reaction?
Ta . . .
liam_okeefe@millershanks-london.co.uk 1/14/00, 9:26am
to: brett_topowlski@millershanks-london.co.uk
cc:
re: Cliffhanger III
I know you’ll be sunning yourselves on the beach now watching cameras roll and tits jiggle, but got to bring you up to date, Pinki hit Crutton first thing with the case against Horne. Apparently he turned purpler than Barney the purple dinosaur’s big, purple knob and threw his lava lamp at the wall. When he calmed down he told Pinki to hire the Watford birds. Even if they won’t come he wants to present the campaign anyway – guess it was too much to hope that he’d actually have a conscience under that £1,500 suit. Makes no odds though, because he’s definitely going to waste Horne.
More news as it comes in.
Lorraine Pallister – 1/14/00, 9:49am
to: Liam O’Keefe
cc:
re: you will not believe this
If you stick your head out your door and peer down the corridor you’ll see Susi-cide dressed tit to toe in pastel pink (pink tights?!). She gave me this really weird smile as she sat down. What the fuck is she doing here? I’m frightened.
Letitia Hegg / letitia@tavistockhegg.aol.co.uk 1/14/00, 10:00am
to: pinki_fallon@millershanks-london.co.uk
cc:
re: Kitty Bates and Jane Backer
Pinki, darling, nothing thrills me more than when my babies are the objects of lustful desire. But are you absolutely sure? One minute you are gasping “yes, yes, yes,” the next Simon is yelling “over my dead body.” What is a girl to think?
Anyhow, this is academic now. The little winkles were buying drinks for all and sundry at the Lamb & Flag last night to celebrate their acquisition of a job at TBWA. Beattie has taken them on at 18k so I don’t think a couple of grand will change their minds.
I’m sorry you missed the boat, but I have dozens of other teams for you to fall head-over-heels in love with. Give the word and I will drown you in a sea of black, zip-up portfolios.
Letty
Pinki Fallon – 1/14/00, 10:03am
to: Zoë Clarke
cc:
re: urgent
I know David is in a meeting, but tell him I’m coming to see him right away . . .
Susi Judge-Davis – 1/14/00, 10:11am
to: Rachel Stevenson
Pinki Fallon
cc: Simon Horne
David Crutton
re: an apology
My breakdown yesterday has given me a chance to reflect upon certain things. I now realise that I may have over-reacted to certain events lately, and I would like to apologise if I have given anybody unnecessary cause for concern. I have been under a great deal of strain but I know that we are all under similar pressures and that it is wrong to rise to provocation. I would be grateful if you would give me the opportunity to remind you that I do have the qualities required of a member of Team Miller Shanks.
Yours truly,
Susi Judge-Davis
daniel_westbrooke@millershanks-london.co.uk 1/14/00, 10:16am (2:16pm local)
to: harriet_greenbaum@millershanks-london.co.uk
cc:
re: Coke
Would anyone like to tell me what is going on with the Coke pitch? I need not remind you that it was I who attended the original briefing with the client. Neither should I have to remind you that I am Head of Client Services. It should be common courtesy to keep me informed of developments. Or is that too much to ask?
pinki_fallon@millershanks-london.co.uk 1/14/00, 10:23am
to: letitia@tavistockhegg.aol.co.uk
cc:
re: Kitty Bates and Jane Backer
I have spoken to David and he has authorised me to go to £45,000 each. They would also be entitled to full benefits – company cars, parking spaces, mobile phones and private health cover.
I know this is an unusually generous package, but it’s an indication that we think they are unique talents who would have a great future here.
Please let me know their response.
Ta . . .
Letitia Hegg / letitia@tavistockhegg.aol.co.uk 1/14/00, 10:26am
to: pinki_fallon@millershanks-london.co.uk
cc:
re: Kitty Bates and Jane Backer
For once I am lost for words. I shall tell them immediately.
David Crutton – 1/14/00, 10:33am
to: Rachel Stevenson
cc:
re: Judge-Davis
I’ve just read that strange e-mail from Susi. That girl spooks me. Some events will probably transpire early next week where it would be opportune to lose her – we can put it down to collateral damage. Please make sure that I don’t forget.
Susi Judge-Davis – 1/14/00, 10:39am
to: Rachel Stevenson
cc: Simon Horne
re: the final straw
A few moments ago Nigel Godley brought up a huge stack of timesheets and literally dumped them on my desk (which, by the way, I had only just tidied). He then informed me that it is now my job to fill these in for the entire department. I pointed out that I am a senior personal assistant who only works for the Executive Creative Director, but he simply stalked off saying that this was the new system and if I didn’t like it I should take it up with David Crutton.
I am making a real effort to get on, but I should not have to deal with rude and ignorant people like him. Rachel, I demand that you deal with this immediately.
Rachel Stevenson – 1/14/00, 10:48am
to: David Crutton
cc:
re: Judge-Davis
Don’t worry, I won’t for a minute let you forget.
Letitia Hegg / letitia@tavistockhegg.aol.co.uk 1/14/00, 10:55am
to: pinki_fallon@millershanks-london.co.uk
cc:
re: Kitty Bates and Jane Backer
I told them. I stressed that an offer of this magnitude is virtually unheard of for a first job. I even made Miller Shanks sound like Shangri-La. Well, a little embroidery is de rigueur if one wishes to make the grade as a headhunter.
Quite astonishingly they said no thank you. They feel that they have made a commitment to TBWA and couldn’t possibly let down the curly-haired Brummie. Besides, they had some words to say about your own employers. How should I put this – they feel the choice of one’s first agency is crucial and believe their prospects would be better served in “a more creative environment.”
I’m so sorry, my dear. But as I said, plenty more fishies in the deep blue sea.
Letty
Pinki Fallon – 1/14/00, 11:01am
to: David Crutton
Harriet Greenbaum
cc:
re: Coke
Can I see you both straight away?
David Crutton – 1/14/00, 11:03am
to: Pinki Fallon
cc:
re: Coke
Harriet is with me now. Stroll on up.
Letitia Hegg / letitia@tavistockhegg.aol.co.uk 1/14/00, 11:21am
to: simon_horne@millershanks-london.co.uk
cc:
re: truly bizarre
Perhaps I am telling you something of which you are already aware, but reading between the lines suggests that you have been excluded from this particular loop, my darling. Despite your clear disinterest in them, Pinki started an outlandish auction for the services of Kitty Bates and Jane Backer this morning. The pri
ce went up to 45k. Well, I wasn’t about to complain, given my cut. But I have to say that while they are good, they are not Evelyn Waugh and Pablo Picasso. She claimed to have David’s full backing. In the end she didn’t get them. They are now the bought and paid for property of Trevor Beattie.
What in heaven’s name is going on, sweetie? You simply must tell your favourite headhunter.
Letty
Pinki Fallon – 1/14/00, 11:30am
to: David Crutton
cc:
re: resignation
Dear David,
I regret that I must tender my resignation. I do not want to leave but under the circumstances I feel I have no other option.
The decision to present Coca-Cola with a campaign idea that is not original and that we know to be the property of a creative team who do not work at Miller Shanks is one that I cannot support. I feel that this betrayal of principle lets the company down, and it has ceased to be the place that I joined with such high hopes last year.
I would prefer to leave immediately, but if you wish I am prepared to work out my three-month notice period.
Yours truly,
Pinki Fallon
Nigel Godley – 1/14/00, 11:38am
to: All Departments
cc:
re: Sale, Sale, Sale!
FOR SALE
Mahogany-style CD rack
• Holds 65 CDs.
• Durable polyurethane construction.
• Authentic mahogany effect.
• Mint condition, apart from one slight scratch.
• £14 or nearest offer.
• First to see will buy!
Call x4667 – Nige
David Crutton – 1/14/00, 11:43am
to: Pinki Fallon
cc:
re: resignation
Your resignation is accepted. You can leave at the end of the day. Would you ask Liam to see me?
Liam O’Keefe – 1/14/00, 11:45am
to: Lorraine Pallister
cc:
re: bye
Pinki’s walked. Crutton wants me. I’m 5′10″, 42″ chest, 32″ inside leg. Order coffin.
liam_okeefe@millershanks-london.co.uk 1/14/00, 12:08pm
to: brett_topowlski@millershanks-london.co.uk