Nora and Maddie made a beeline for the shelf. Nora selected a wine glass and upended the decanter into her glass, filling it to the brim with the dark red liquid. She wasn’t always in the mood for red wine, but right now, she wanted something stronger than beer. And she didn’t want liquor. She wanted something that she could really drink. Wine it was. She took a sip of it.
“Oh!” Nora said it surprise. “It’s sweet. I think it’s got berries in it.”
“Valentine’s dessert red,” said a woman on the other side of the shelving unit. She had auburn hair and a croaking voice. “You like it?”
Nora nodded. “I do.”
The woman smiled. “Well, I made it, so thanks.”
“Oh,” said Nora. “It really is very good.”
The woman chuckled. “What are you girls doing up here? Don’t you have dates tonight?”
“Had,” said Maddie, who was getting herself some of the wine as well. “But mine is a dick. And Nora’s…” She made a sympathetic face. “What happened, sweetie?”
Nora went and sat down at one of the tables. “Sawyer’s in love with someone else.”
“He was cheating on you?” said the woman. “That dog.”
“I don’t know if he did anything,” said Nora. “He wants to, though.”
Maddie sat down with her. “How could that be? There’s no way that Sawyer could love someone besides you.”
Nora slugged some wine down.
“Go easy on that,” said the woman, sitting down with them as well. “It’s more potent than you think. I’m Gabby Vine.” She offered the girls her hand and they shook. “And if there’s one thing I got experience with, it’s men being disappointing.”
“They’re stupid,” said Maddie. “They’re all preoccupied with the wrong things. Like how much you eat or how much you weigh.”
Nora drew back. “Did Agler say something about your weight?”
Maddie nodded.
“He is an asshole,” Nora said darkly.
“I’ll say,” said Gabby, taking her in.
“I don’t want to talk about it,” said Maddie. “Nora, you have to explain this to me. How could Sawyer break up with you?”
“He said that it was better for me,” said Nora, “because he could never be attracted to me the way I deserved.”
“What?” said Maddie. “That’s awful.”
Nora started to cry. “No, I think he meant it as nicely as you can mean something like that. He says he likes guys. That he’s gay. And that he didn’t know before, but he just figured it out when he was looking at Lute Thundercloud, and now—”
“Oh gods, he has been talking about Lute all the time.” Maddie made a face.
“Wait,” said Gabby, “I knew you looked familiar. You’re that girl who’s been palling around with the boy who wears skirts.”
Nora drank more wine. “That’s me.”
“Well, sweetheart, I don’t mean to be insensitive, but didn’t you think it was obvious?”
“No,” said Nora. “I didn’t. He wanted to be with me. He seemed really genuine.”
“Darlin’, I’m not saying he wasn’t. He probably thought he did want you. The clearest thing about that boy is that he’s confused,” said Gabby.
Nora took another gulp of wine. “I thought we were perfect for each other. I thought it as recently as three hours ago. And now…”
Gabby patted Nora’s hand. “There, there. I’m not saying it doesn’t hurt. You poor thing.”
Maddie took Nora’s other hand. “Screw him, anyway. You don’t need him. You’ve never needed him.”
But Nora couldn’t help bursting into tears again—deep, heart-wrenching sobs.
* * *
Sawyer packed up all of his clothes and all of his stuff. He wanted it out of the tent before Nora got back. He thought that it would be less hard on her if there were less reminders of him inside their shared space. He was probably being silly. There wasn’t anything he was going to do to make things easier for her. But he felt horrible. He had hurt her worse than he’d meant to. He’d bungled all of it, and she was devastated. But now it was done. He couldn’t take it back.
Partly, he wanted to punish himself as well. If he forced himself to move out of the tent quickly, then he was at least suffering some kind of inconvenience. He deserved all the inconvenient discomfort he could muster.
He piled all his belongings on the other side of the enclave from their old tent, in an empty spot, and then he headed to the architecture enclave to get another tent. The architecture enclave was separated from the rest of Helicon by a thick wall. Sawyer had to enter through the wrought-iron gates, and then make his way through twisting streets inside. The architecture enclave displayed all kinds of different buildings—some Gothic cathedrals, others strictly modern with sharp angles and rectangles stacked on top of each other. It was Valentine’s Day, so the streets were mostly empty. Anyone in the enclave was away somewhere with their special someone.
That was fine. Sawyer just wanted to get a tent. He threaded through the streets until he got to a street corner, where a massive green tent was pitched. In front of the tent, there was a big sign that read, “Per permission from the council, no new tents will be available until the last week of February.”
Sawyer’s heart sank. He’d forgotten that announcement had been made at the council meeting during which they’d sentenced Lute. He wasn’t going to have a tent, then. If he let Nora sleep in their old tent, then he’d be homeless. That was just perfect. Shoulders slumped, he turned and went back the way he came.
He left the architecture enclave and was in such a crappy mood that he decided he needed a drink. There had been a bottle of wine in the basket he’d gotten to share with Nora, but he had thrown away everything in the basket. It seemed tainted, since they’d parted over its contents. No, if he wanted something, he was going to have to go to the wine and spirits enclave.
He trekked up there, but when he looked into the common tent, the first person he saw was Nora.
Damn it. Of course she’d come here.
Well, he couldn’t barge in there now. It would upset her worse. She was trying to get away from him.
Still, he gazed at the barrel of beer longingly, wishing he could just get a pint of it.
But he wasn’t going to screw things up for Nora. No, he wasn’t.
So, he turned around again. He went back to the tweens and rebels enclave and trudged over to the place where he’d left his stuff. He sat down in the middle of his bags. He didn’t know what else to do at this point. He guessed he was going to be sleeping out under the sky tonight. For several nights, in fact. He had some blankets in one of these bags. It shouldn’t be that much of a problem. He sighed.
He sat there, not doing anything, for quite some time. After a while, he heard the sounds of some other tweens, who seemed to be lighting the fire in the fire pit. He considered joining them. Maybe someone there had some beer they felt like sharing.
Figuring it couldn’t be much worse than sitting out here by himself, he got up and started toward the fire pit.
He was halfway there when he spotted Lute amongst the other tweens. Lute was there with about four girls that generally hung out in the music enclave. One of them was lighting the fire. Another was strumming idly on a guitar. Lute had a riccina strapped to his back, which was a Helicon-made stringed instrument shaped like a banana. He was telling the guitar-playing girl something.
Sawyer froze. He didn’t know if he wanted to be around Lute yet.
But before he could retreat, Lute turned around, and their gazes locked.
Lute looked captivating—his dark blond hair gleaming in the light of the new fire, the broadness of his shoulders accentuated by the instrument strapped to his back. He raised a hand, his expression breaking into a grin.
Sawyer was undone. Lute’s smile was utterly devastating.
“Hey, Sawyer,” called Lute. “Where’s your girlfriend?”
Sawyer on
ly shook his head.
Lute stepped over the benches surrounding the fire pit and traipsed over. “You okay? You don’t look good.”
Sawyer looked up at the sky. “I, uh, I broke up with her.”
“Really?” Lute sounded happy about that.
Sawyer looked at him.
His grin had definitely widened.
Sawyer ran a hand through his hair. “Yeah. I did. I just…” The thought of Nora’s tears came back to him, and he wanted to cry too.
“Aw, hell,” said Lute, sounding abashed. “I didn’t mean… That’s rough.”
Sawyer shifted from one foot to the other. “I should go.”
“No, no. You shouldn’t be alone.” He gestured to the girls at the fire pit. “We’re the singleton brigade at Valentine’s Day. You should hang with us.”
Sawyer peered around Lute at the others. “I don’t know.”
Lute grabbed him by the arm.
Sawyer tensed at his touch.
Lute laughed a little, but he sounded breathless. “I’m not letting you go anywhere.” He tugged on Sawyer. “Come on.”
Sawyer didn’t resist any longer. When it came down to it, more than anything, he wanted to be near Lute.
CHAPTER SIX
Agler peered around the dining room in the food enclave. It was the next morning after Valentine’s Day, and he hadn’t spoken to Maddie since she’d run off in the middle of their meal. He’d been annoyed with her, sure that he wasn’t in the wrong, so he’d stubbornly refused to go by her tent and apologize. She should apologize to him, that was the way he figured it.
He waited all night for her to come by, but she never did.
Now, this morning, he was beginning to think that he would just apologize and be done with it. He was worried about Maddie, that was true, but getting into a fight with her wasn’t going to help anything along. It would only mean that they weren’t speaking to each other, and he knew for a fact that Maddie sometimes only ate food because he prompted her. If he wasn’t around to make her eat, she might eat even less. So, he needed to make up with her—for her own good.
He spotted her across the room. She was sitting with Nora, but Sawyer wasn’t there. The girls weren’t at their normal table either, where the four of them usually sat together.
He started in their direction anyway. He would have preferred to have this conversation alone with Maddie, but if Nora was there, he guessed it didn’t matter. Hell, the four of them were so far twisted up into each other’s business that they all knew too much about each other’s relationships as it was.
Maddie turned around.
He caught her eye and waved.
She drew her eyebrows together and purposefully turned her back on him.
He stopped going towards their table, his shoulders slumping.
Someone clapped him on the back. He looked over his shoulder to see his best friend Jack.
“Hey there,” said Jack. “You and the little misses have a falling out?”
Agler gritted his teeth. “She’s being a child.”
“Yeah, well she is three years younger than us.” Jack grinned. “Join me for breakfast?”
Agler sat down with Jack. Mercifully, Jack didn’t ask him any questions about what had happened. He just started chattering on about some stuff he was working on in the science enclave. Jack had just recently started hanging out there, and he thought Agler should go there too. Agler wasn’t entirely sure what he liked to do, but he knew it wasn’t science. There was too much precision and measurement in the experiments—just like cooking. He hated that shit.
Agler listened, not saying much, stuffing his face, and keeping an eye on Maddie and Nora. Maddie was talking a lot. Nora wasn’t. Agler tried to see if Maddie was eating. It didn’t really look like it. Damn it.
Then Maddie motioned Colin Oak over to the girl’s table. They both seemed cheered when he sat down to eat with them.
“…so if you think about it, on a quantum level, we might be creating electrons,” said Jack.
“Why do you think Colin Oak is sitting with them?” said Agler.
Jack shrugged. “I don’t know. Eva was saying yesterday that she thought he was cute, but I can’t say I see it. So, anyway, it’s like we can see them, but then we can’t. It’s like they pop out of existence. And we think they come back, but what if we create a completely new one, just with our minds, not even with muse magic?”
“I can’t believe she’s sitting with him.”
“Agler, you should really be single. Like me.” Jack grinned. “Or maybe you’re gay. You think? Because it seems like girls just cause you suffering.”
Agler tossed his banana peel at Jack.
Jack ducked, and it sailed over his head. He laughed. “Seriously. Because you’re always in some funk over one or the other of those girls and—” He broke off, lips parting slowly. “Hang on.”
“What?” Agler looked in the direction that Jack was looking.
“What’s going on with that?” Jack pointed.
Agler saw that Sawyer was sitting down with Lute Thundercloud, not with Nora. He turned over to see that Nora had seen him too. She got up from the table, white faced, and started out of the dining room. Maddie got up to go after her.
“Huh,” said Jack. “You don’t think good ol’ Sawyer finally realized he’s been playing for the wrong team, do you? If so, it sure took him long enough. I swear, that boy was all about keeping his legs crossed when I was with him.”
Agler made a face. “Can you please not talk about having sex with Sawyer while I’m eating my breakfast?”
“I don’t see how we’re such good friends when you’re so homophobic.”
“I’d ask you to stop talking about it if you were talking about a girl too. Sex and breakfast don’t mix.” Agler looked ruefully at his second banana. He probably wouldn’t be eating that after all.
Jack chuckled. “That’s what I’m saying, though. I never had sex with him. Hell, I could barely get my hands below the waist.”
Agler glared at him.
Jack snagged Agler’s banana. “You gonna eat that?”
Agler let him.
After breakfast, he went looking for Maddie in the dance enclave, but she wasn’t there. When he asked after her, one of the other muses told him that Maddie was off comforting Nora, who had gone through a bad breakup. So, that seemed to confirm the fact that Nora and Sawyer were splitsville.
It was ironic. Last year at this time, if Sawyer and Nora had broken up, Agler would have been overjoyed. He’d been so into Nora last year, and he hadn’t wanted her to be in that relationship. But now he knew that whatever he’d felt for Nora had been juvenile and insignificant. He had much stronger feelings for Maddie.
Anyway, he felt bad for Nora. She deserved to be happy. But seriously, it wasn’t that surprising that Sawyer had eventually decided to be gay after all. He wore skirts, for fuck’s sake.
He didn’t get a chance to look for Maddie again until dinner that night. But she didn’t come to the main fire pit. So, he went back to the tweens and rebels enclave, where he found Maddie and Nora moving all of Nora’s stuff out of her tent.
He asked what was going on.
Maddie ignored him, even when he got right in her face and asked again. Loudly. She just stepped around him, rolling her eyes.
He wanted to scream at her, but he didn’t. Instead, he folded his arms over his chest and waited.
Eventually, Nora took pity on him. She explained that she was moving into Maddie’s tent for a week or so, just until they had new tents in the architecture enclave again. She was going to let Sawyer have their tent.
Then she said, “How dare you say Maddie was fat? I’ve never seen her so thin.”
Agler just sputtered, trying to get out his denial.
But Nora had already stalked off.
After that, she didn’t speak to him either.
The both of them ignored him. They ignored him the next day at breakfast, t
he next day at dinner, the next evening when he came by Maddie’s tent, practically begging her to let him apologize. He tried again the next day, and they ignored him again.
After that, he gave up.
Time passed.
The tent that Nora and Sawyer had shared came down from the middle of the enclave. A new tent for Nora went up next to Maddie’s, which was where her tent used to be before she moved in with Sawyer.
Sawyer got another tent too, and he pitched it out in the woods, near Lute’s tent. Sawyer and Lute could be seen together now, going to meals, drinking together around the fire pit. There weren’t any signs of intimacy between them. No holding hands or kissing. They could have just been friends. But everyone in the enclave was fairly sure they were together.
Now that Maddie wasn’t sharing her tent, she still wouldn’t talk to Agler.
Agler was beginning to think that they’d broken up, which was rich, because all he’d tried to do was save her from freaking starving herself. If she cared so much about her diet, maybe she deserved it, he thought darkly.
But after a week went by, Agler wasn’t angry anymore. Instead, he was only sad. And worried. Really worried about her. He still cared about her. She was very important to him, and he thought that they were perfect together. He wasn’t about to let her go. But he didn’t know what to do, because he didn’t think he could resume the relationship the way it had been. No, he couldn’t keep his mouth shut about how little she ate.
She was hurting herself, but he couldn’t stop it.
If they got back together, he would keep at her until she started eating. And… well, hell, maybe that wouldn’t be the best way for them to be in a relationship. He couldn’t always be telling her what to do.
In defeat, he decided that the most important thing was Maddie’s health. Maybe if she could tackle this problem on her own, once she had it under control, she’d be ready to come back to Agler.
He could wait. He’d wait forever for her. She was special.
So, one day, he trekked up to the visual arts enclave around lunch time. He found Nora back by the visual arts fire pit, which wasn’t lit. But several of the muses were sitting around it, eating. The visual arts enclave fire pit was much more landscaped and stylized than the one in the tweens and rebels enclave. There was a metal sculpture surrounding the pit, depicting dancing figures. The ground was covered in smooth stones and all the metal chairs around matched. They were similarly decorated like the sculpture.
The Helicon Muses Omnibus: Books 1-4 Page 95