The Girl's Guide to Falling in Love

by Sophie Hart

  And now she’d potentially thrown it all away with one major act of stupidity. She was supposed to be getting married in just over a week, but at this rate it looked as though there’d be no wedding at all. Zoe thought of the beautiful dress she’d bought, sitting inside its protective bag at her friend Hannah’s house, and at the thought that she might never wear it she began crying all over again, fat tears rolling down her cheeks and landing on the duvet cover that still smelt of Simon.

  She pulled it close, inhaling deeply, breathing in the scent of his aftershave and his shampoo and that indefinable but unmistakeable smell that was… Simon. Oh God, she missed him! Why, oh why, had she reacted so badly to that text? Now she faced spending the rest of her life alone, just a sad, bitter, old—

  The door buzzer rang, and Zoe shuffled over to the entryphone to answer it, the duvet wrapped around her waist impeding her progress.

  ‘Hello?’ Zoe snuffled.

  ‘Hey love, it’s me,’ Julia’s voice came back.

  ‘Come on up,’ Zoe told her, as she pressed the button to let her in. ‘I warn you, I look a mess.’

  ‘Oh, Zoe,’ Julia sighed, after she’d trudged up the stairs to the first-floor flat and took in the sight of her friend. ‘Oh, poor you,’ she exclaimed, enveloping her in a hug.

  ‘I think I smell,’ Zoe murmured sadly.

  ‘Maybe just a little bit,’ Julia said tactfully. ‘But nothing that a nice hot shower won’t fix.’

  ‘Jules, I’ve been such an idiot,’ Zoe sighed dramatically, as she flopped back down on the sofa, and began to cry once again.

  ‘Don’t get upset,’ Julia pleaded. ‘What’s happened? Tell me everything.’

  And Zoe did. She told Julia all about Simon’s previous relationship with Emily, and the text message he’d received from her, the argument they’d had, and the way she’d thrown him out of the flat.

  ‘He wanted me to go with him to see Annie, ’ Zoe managed, through her hiccoughs. ‘But I refused. She offered to see us specially, at late notice, but I was too stubborn. And then Simon got really mad with me all over again and didn’t come home last night. Oh no,… what if he went to Emily’s and spent the night with her?’ she wondered, her face falling at the terrible thought.

  ‘He didn’t,’ Julia assured her. ‘Of course he didn’t. He stayed with his parents.’

  ‘Right,’ Zoe nodded, feeling guilty all over again, and wondering what Brian and Jill must think of her.

  ‘You know what, Zoe,’ Julia began gently. ‘I think this might be a classic case of cold feet.’

  ‘Do you?’ Zoe wondered, looking up at Julia through tear-stained eyes. ‘What if it’s not? What if it’s something else, like women’s intuition, or gut instinct?’

  ‘I know both of you. I know how much Simon loves you, and I know how much you love him. Seriously, what is your gut telling you? Is it telling you that you’ve made a big fuss over nothing and Simon’s the man for you, or is it telling you that he’s a cheat and a liar who’s been double-crossing you the whole time?’

  Put like that, Zoe could see how ridiculous it sounded. She started to wonder whether perhaps she had overreacted. ‘My gut’s a bit confused right now,’ Zoe mumbled, looking shame-faced.

  Julia tried not to smile, feeling that the worst of the crisis had passed. ‘Can I call Simon, and ask him to come round and speak to you?’ she asked gently.

  Zoe hesitated.

  ‘He’s going out of his mind,’ Julia told her. ‘And I’m not exaggerating. He’s been calling me, Annie, Linda, even your mum, trying to find out what’s going on, and if you’re okay. He said you wouldn’t pick up the phone to him.’

  Zoe glanced at her mobile, where she was currently up to sixty-four missed calls.

  ‘Please, Zoe.’

  Finally, Zoe relented. ‘Okay then,’ she agreed sullenly, as Julia grinned.

  ‘Maybe I should team up with Annie – I reckon I could be a fantastic relationship therapist.’

  ‘No way,’ Zoe shook her head. ‘You’re far too good an events planner to ever change career.’

  ‘Exactly! I’ve put so much work into this wedding, there’s no way I’m going to let you call it off.’

  Zoe pretended to glare at her. ‘Okay, okay, you’ve made your point. Now call my fiancé before I change my mind.’

  * * *

  Simon was swearing out loud at the vehicle in front of him. ‘Pull off the road!’ he yelled. ‘Pull off the road and let me past!’

  But the tractor driver didn’t seem to care, as he merrily trundled along at twenty miles per hour, unaware of Simon’s frustration behind him.

  Simon swerved out wildly into the road, but it was no good – it was impossible to see round the corner on the narrow, twisty lane, and he simply couldn’t risk it.

  ‘Move!’ Simon yelled again, accompanying the shout with a blast of his horn. Finally, blessedly, the tractor pulled into a siding. Simon put his foot down on the accelerator and roared past, shooting along the quiet country road.

  As soon as he’d received Julia’s phone call, he’d leapt straight up from the kitchen table where he’d been eating his dinner; despite his insistence that he wasn’t hungry, when faced with his mother’s homemade chicken pie and mashed potato, he’d finally relented. But he’d dropped his knife and fork when he heard what Julia had to tell him, pulling on his shoes as he raced out of the door.

  The journey into the city seemed to take forever, and Simon’s heart was pounding by the time he screeched into his usual parking spot round the corner from the flat. He took the stairs two at a time, stopping nervously as he reached the front door. Suddenly, all his bravado deserted him, and nerves took over. What if Zoe hadn’t really forgiven him? What if they had another huge row, one that ended everything, for good?

  Cautiously, he raised his hand and knocked on the door. He could hear Zoe moving around inside the flat, and then the door swung open.

  Simon swallowed. ‘Hi,’ he said nervously. Something caught in his throat and he coughed to clear it.

  ‘Hi,’ Zoe replied, her eyes wide as she looked up at him anxiously. Her hair was dripping wet as though she’d just had a shower – which, in fact, she had – and she was dressed in one of Simon’s old T-shirts. At the sight of her, Simon’s heart melted.

  ‘Why didn’t you use your key?’ she asked in confusion.

  ‘I didn’t… I didn’t know if I was still welcome.’

  ‘Oh Si, of course you are.’ Zoe’s lower lip was wobbling dangerously, tears brimming in her eyes. She didn’t think it was possible to cry any more than she had done in the last twenty-four hours, but it seemed as though she wasn’t finished yet.

  Simon took a step towards her, and before Zoe knew what she was doing, she was moving towards him too, and the next minute they were in each other’s arms and Simon was smothering her with kisses, holding her like he never wanted to let her go. Zoe felt light-headed, dizzy with excitement. Simon’s embrace was strong, his chest large and powerful, and Zoe knew one thing with absolute certainty – in his arms was right where she was meant to be.

  ‘I’m so sorry,’ she apologised frantically. ‘I’ve been such an idiot. I know you’d never—’

  ‘It doesn’t matter,’ Simon told her, in between kisses. ‘I don’t care about that. I just worried that you—’

  Suddenly he stopped, pulling away from her, as though he’d remembered something. Zoe looked at him anxiously, wondering what was happening. As she watched, Simon dropped to one knee in front of her.

  ‘Si? What…?’

  ‘I know this seems like déjà vu, but I love you with all my heart, and I would never do anything to hurt you. All I want to do is be the best man I can be to make you the happiest woman in the world.’

  Zoe was crying again now, but this time they were tears of happiness.

  ‘I’ve done this once publicly, and now I want to do it again privately, just for the two of us. Zoe Miller, would you do me the honour of be
coming my wife?’

  Suddenly, Zoe began to giggle. All the pressure of the past few weeks, all the misery of the past few hours, faded into nothing, and she wanted to laugh out loud from pure joy and relief. ‘Yes, Simon, of course I’ll marry you! Get up, you idiot,’ she laughed, pulling him to his feet.

  Simon swept her into his arms once again, kissing her long and hard, as though he couldn’t get enough of her.

  ‘I love you,’ Simon murmured, as they finally pulled away.

  ‘I love you too,’ Zoe whispered back. ‘So, so, much.’

  ‘So does this mean that the wedding’s back on?’

  ‘Yes,’ Zoe confirmed happily, her eyes shining. ‘The wedding is absolutely, definitely, one hundred percent back on.’

  37

  Chapter Thirty-seven

  ‘Civilised people cannot fully satisfy their sexual instinct without love’ – Bertrand Russell

  ‘What if she doesn’t turn up?’ Simon turned anxiously to his best man Gary.

  The two of them were standing outside St Stephen’s Church in the little village of Great Walton, the sun beating down on them and making Simon sweat even more than he was already. The day was beautiful, not a cloud visible in the cerulean sky, and the church bells were ringing out in celebration.

  ‘She will. Of course she will,’ Gary assured him. ‘Why wouldn’t she?’

  ‘I dunno. Maybe she’ll have another attack of cold feet. Maybe she’ll change her mind. Anything could happen.’

  ‘Look, if she doesn’t turn up, I’ll marry you,’ Gary offered helpfully.

  Simon glared at him. ‘Thanks, that’s really nice of you.’

  ‘Mate, you love her, she loves you, it’s all going to be perfect. And if you could set me up with one of the bridesmaids then this could be the best day ever.’

  In spite of everything, Simon burst out laughing. He’d known Gary since they were kids, and would have trusted him with his life. ‘Okay, I’ll do my best. I think her friend Kerry is single, so I’ll introduce you. She lives in Chester though.’

  For a moment, Gary looked downcast, before perking up suddenly. ‘There’s always Skype,’ he remembered, with a cheeky grin. ‘I’ve never had Skype sex before.’

  Simon shook his head, giving him a friendly thump on the arm. Gary winced, looking as though he was in genuine pain; he was far smaller and skinnier than Simon, and Simon sometimes seemed to forget this.

  ‘Straighten up, look smart,’ Simon told him sharply. ‘There’s more guests arriving.’

  As they drew closer, Simon realised that it was Annie and Linda walking towards him. Annie looked gorgeous in a blue silk maxi-dress paired with a cream pashmina, while Linda was equally lovely in a bright cerise dress and matching jacket. She’d arrived without Ray, as he was going to be the one driving Zoe and her father, Geoff, to the church. Annie had arranged for them to borrow her brother-in-law’s vintage Triumph, which Linda had decorated with cream ribbon and a small posy of flowers.

  ‘Simon!’ Annie greeted him. ‘You look so handsome.’

  ‘He scrubs up well, doesn’t he?’ Gary grinned.

  It was true. Simon looked great in the dark grey suit, with matching patterned waistcoat and silk tie.

  ‘How are the nerves?’ Annie asked.

  ‘Out of control!’

  ‘Oh, you’ll be fine, honestly.’

  ‘Thanks, Annie. And thanks so much for all you’ve done for us. You’ve really helped us out.’

  ‘And tonight’s the moment of truth,’ Annie couldn’t resist reminding him. ‘Enjoy yourself.’

  ‘Oh, I will,’ Simon assured her, before turning to Linda. ‘The flowers look amazing, and you’ve done such a wonderful job. I know Zoe will be so happy.’

  ‘We aim to please,’ Linda smiled, looking thrilled with the compliment. ‘Ooh, look, there’s Julia and Nick just arriving.’

  Nick was parking his BMW outside the church, getting out to open the door for his wife. They strode across the road holding hands, and Annie thought once again what a good-looking couple they made. Nick looked confident and at ease in the classic suit which brought out his dark good looks, while Julia looked stunning in a pretty knee-length floral dress.

  ‘There she is, the woman responsible for this whole shebang,’ Simon greeted Julia, opening his arms wide and embracing her. She’d spent the morning driving frantically between the church and the reception venue, making sure that everything was set up just as it should be, before zooming home to change her clothes and grab Nick. ‘You look beautiful.’

  ‘Oi oi, hands off, you’re getting one of your own soon,’ Nick joked, as he shook hands with Simon, clapping him on the back. ‘How are you doing?’

  ‘Not bad,’ Simon said uncertainly. ‘I’ll just be relieved when she turns up and says “I do”.’

  ‘Not long now,’ Nick grinned.

  Simon looked nervously at Julia, suddenly seeming far smaller than his six feet and one inch. ‘She is coming, isn’t she?’ he asked quietly.

  Julia laid a reassuring hand on his arm. ‘Of course she is. I’ll see you in there,’ Julia smiled, taking Nick’s arm as they made their way along the flagstone path and into the quaint country church.

  Simon and Gary turned back to greet the other new arrivals, who were now streaming down the street towards St Stephen’s. There were Simon’s old school friends, his rugby mates, long lost relatives who he hadn’t seen for years, as well as all of Zoe’s family and friends, whose names he tried desperately to remember. When everyone was finally seated inside, Simon looked anxiously up and down the road before checking his watch.

  ‘She’s late,’ he said, unable to hide the concern in his voice.

  ‘It’s the bride’s prerogative to be late,’ Gary assured him. ‘Besides, she’s probably doing it on purpose, making you suffer. I would.’

  ‘Thanks a lot.’

  As Simon checked his watch again, Gary’s phone beeped and he pulled it out of his trouser pocket.

  ‘Make sure that thing’s on silent. I don’t want the “Thong Song” blasting out while we’re saying our vows,’ Simon warned him, referring to Gary’s inappropriate ringtone.

  Gary grinned as he pressed a couple of buttons. ‘No problem, it’s off. But I thought you’d like to know that Ray’s just texted me. They’re on their way, and they’ll be here in five minutes.’

  Simon went pale, beads of sweat breaking out along his forehead. ‘Okay. Right. Shit. Have you got the rings?’

  Gary patted his top pocket confidently. ‘All taken care of, mate. Now come on, let’s get you inside.’

  * * *

  The anticipation had reached fever pitch. People were turning round in their seats every few seconds to see if they could spot anything. From his position at the front of the church, Simon had a clear view straight down the aisle, and he knew that any moment now he would see Zoe arrive on her father’s arm.

  Then suddenly the mood in the building seemed to shift, and the strains of ‘Here Comes the Bride’ rang out on the church organ, followed by gasps as the guests caught their first sight of the bride.

  Simon looked up and saw Zoe standing at the door beside her father. Geoff looked proud enough to burst, but Simon noticed nothing except his wife-to-be. He didn’t think he’d ever seen her looking so beautiful, or so radiant.

  She was wearing her dream gown, with its classic, simple silhouette and the jewelled belt that showed off her tiny waist. Her make-up was subtle, and she looked like the quintessential English rose, with a little pink blush on her cheeks and a smudge of colour on her lips. She was wearing the earrings Simon had bought for her birthday, which matched her engagement ring perfectly, and there was no other jewellery to spoil the effect.

  Her titian hair had been blow-dried into soft waves, with the front pinned up so that it fell gently around her face, whilst Linda had provided the most incredible bouquet of pale pink gardenias, dark pink roses and gypsophila. There was no doubt about it: Zoe looked
breathtaking.

  She walked towards Simon, beaming uncontrollably, the very picture of happiness. Simon couldn’t take his eyes off her, oblivious to the fact that Linda was dabbing her eyes as she clung to Ray’s arm, or that Julia had turned to Nick and the two of them were sharing a small, private smile, both of them lost in memories of their own wedding day.

  As Zoe reached him, she smiled shyly.

  ‘You look so beautiful,’ Simon whispered, utterly entranced.

  ‘I love you,’ Zoe mouthed in reply.

  And then the vicar stepped forward, and the ceremony began.

  For Simon, it passed in a blur. He found himself saying the words that were so familiar from countless films and television programmes, seeing Zoe’s barely concealed look of amusement as he was forced to say his hated second name – Gideon – out loud. He stumbled over a couple of words, and there were sympathetic smiles and good-natured sniggers from his friends and family.

  And then the vicar said the famous words: ‘I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.’

  Simon and Zoe gazed at each other, smiles of happiness and relief and disbelief on their faces. They were finally married, with rings on their fingers to prove it! Simon took Zoe in his arms and kissed her, tentatively at first, but with the encouragement of the congregation it soon became more intense.

  Finally, they were together: for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health. And Simon didn’t want it any other way.

  * * *

  The happy couple emerged from the church to a chorus of cheers and applause, confetti and rice raining down on them. Ray quickly slipped back into his driver role, hopping back behind the wheel of the Triumph. Linda would get a lift to the reception with Annie in her Mini Cooper.