by Paige Watson
“What’s wrong?” He pushed himself up slowly, wiping the sleep from his eyes. I threw myself into his arms. “Evey, what’s going on?” He was alert; all the dregs of rest cleared from his mind.
“You spent your last night alive with me,” I said.
“I would spend any night with you, especially if I knew it was going to be my last.”
“Don’t say that!” I yelled, pounding on his chest. He cradled me in his lap in an attempt to comfort me, but his efforts were pointless. “He killed you because of me and I’m so sorry.”
“Why are you sorry? I wasn’t lost to you forever; see, I’m here with you now.”
“Yes, but we didn’t know you would be made into one of my secundae back then. I thought I would have to live again and again, never getting to see you or talk to you again. The thought of losing you like that was unbearable.”
“I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere.”
“But the pain of dying, I’m sorry you had to experience that,” I answered.
“It was worth it,” he shrugged.
“What was?”
“The night we spent together in your bed was worth dying for; it was the first time we were ever together like that. We spent a lot of that night making up for the time we knew we wouldn’t have,” he said with a grin.
“We said we were husband and wife that night.”
“We can be again if that’s what you want,” he said, looking down at me.
“What do you want?”
“You.”
“And what if I said you couldn’t have me?” I said, straddling his lap playfully.
“I would still take you,” he answered in a suggestive voice.
I smiled slightly and looked away from his gaze. “What did Noah want to speak with you about?” He placed his hands on either side of my waist. My fingers pressed along the edges of the tape that held the bandage to his chest, resealing its edges.
“Well, he knows I came to see you even though the Concilium forbade me to, but when we go to see the Head of the Concilium he is going to take my side on the matter. Noah was the only consiliarius that thought it was wrong to separate us in the first place.”
“I knew I liked him,” I smiled. “Why did he think it was wrong to separate us?”
“He believes we are stronger when we’re together and that when we’re apart, we become very vulnerable.”
“He seems so different from what I imagined a consiliarius to be like.”
“Yes, he isn’t like the rest of the Concilium. I think it’s because of his past. He experienced a lot of grief before he was made into a consiliarius, and he can relate to the secundae better than he can the Concilium. He remembers what it’s like to feel pain and when you live so many lives like the secundae do, you are bound to know pain. It would be impossible for us to live over the course of hundreds of years and never experience sorrow.” His fingers traced the curves of my waist as he spoke. “Actually, Noah was the one that suggested I be made into a secundae.”
“Really?” I couldn’t help but be surprised at such a revelation; although after what he had told me of Noah, I shouldn’t be surprised at all. “Why did he do that?”
“I think it’s because he never liked Aden. He always thought Aden was too cocky; well at least that’s what he said whenever I was one of his secundae. Either way, I think he could see Aden was power hungry and cruel before anyone else could.”
“I guess I should thank him then,” I said, leaning back on my hands. “Will you tell me what happened when you were brought back as one of my secundae and we saw each other for the first time?”
A sly grin spread over his face. “Usually I would tell you, but I think that’s one time you should allow yourself to remember.”
“Why is that?”
“Because telling you what happened wouldn’t do it justice.” The grin he was wearing was completely sinful, and for a moment I thought I actually saw him blush.
“I can see how that would be,” I said smiling at him. “Did you want to become a secundae before you were actually made into one?”
“I always hoped I would, but you aren’t asked to be one until you die.”
“So you were happy when they asked you to be one?”
“I was relieved. We had been given a second chance to be together, or at least that’s how I looked at it,” he replied. He was staring at me intently and I felt my cheeks start to burn.
“Me too.” He looked at me with a puzzled expression. “I may not be able to remember everything from the past but there is one thing I do know and that’s how I feel about you.”
“And how do you feel about me?”
“It’s like part of my life was missing and I never realized it until I met you.” He took hold of me and pressed me against his chest so our bodies were cuddled together. “And then everything started to make sense when you came around.” I looked up at him and saw his eyes were closed. “Conrad?”
“Hmm?” He opened his eyes and turned his face toward me.
“Do you ever get tired of being with the same person for so long? I mean, we’ve been together for hundreds of years and I just wonder if you ever got bored with me.”
“Why would you ever think that?”
“I don’t know, because I’m not that great and Helen obviously likes you; and don’t try to say you’re just friends, because nothing friendly is happening on her end.”
“But I don’t feel that way about her; you’re the only woman that I’ve ever loved. I’ve spent the better part of 500 years with you, and every day I wake up, all I want is more time together.”
“I wish I could say I never loved anyone else, but I know there was once a time when I did love Aden,” I said, instantly feeling guilty. I looked down at the white sheets and absent mindedly started tugging at the soft material.
“What’s wrong?” He studied my face as he waited for me to answer his question.
“I feel like a bad person because of it.”
“It’s like I said before, he wasn’t always cruel, and you loved him before you met me.”
“And I fell out of love with him before I met you too?”
“Yes.”
“I think we were meant to be together all along.” He said nothing in reply. Instead, he took my hand in his and planted a soft kiss on it. “Do you think he still loves me?” The words seemed to slip out of my mouth before I could stop them. It generally wasn’t standard to ask your current boyfriend or husband, if he could technically be considered that, questions about your first husband. Then again, it isn’t every day you find out you’re a reincarnated queen. He took in a deep breath before interlacing our fingers.
“I believe he still does.”
“But how? I mean, he did have me killed.”
“Because he was jealous. Love is a much more powerful emotion than hate. I think he’s still in love with you and he hates himself.”
“Why would he hate himself?” I had to admit that while I didn’t want to remember the time I spent with Aden, I was still curious about the man he’d become.
“He hates himself because he drove you away and he knows you will never be able to love him the way you once did.”
“How do you know?”
“Well…” he paused for a moment to collect his thoughts. “I mean, that’s how I would be feeling if I were him.”
“So you don’t think he wants to kill me?”
“I think he wants to win you back.”
I got up to start getting dressed and watched as Conrad fell back asleep. I walked into the bathroom and began curling my hair. Caroline walked in while I was getting ready.
“Hey roomie,” I said beaming at her.
“Hey!”
“Did you sleep ok?”
“Oh yeah, that bed is amazing! It’s like sleeping on a giant pillow. Do you care if I shower while you get ready?”
“Not at all.” She poured out her makeup on the counter, mixing it with m
ine. Then she quietly shut the door to my room and hopped in the shower. Once she was out, we started doing our makeup together. “Is that what you’re wearing?” I pointed to the outfit she had hanging by the shower.
“Yeah, you think it will look ok?”
“I think it will get some attention,” I grinned at her.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” she replied innocently. “What are you wearing?” I went to my bedroom and returned with a blue dress with white polka dots all over it. It fit tight through the bust and waist leading out to a fuller skirt. It reminded me of the retro style dresses they wore in the 1950’s. “Oh, I love that dress.”
Caroline slid on her short pastel pink skirt and a dark grey shirt that cut low in the front. A baby blue sweater completed her outfit.
“I wonder if Noah likes pink,” I said, teasing her. I stepped into my dress and turned my back to her, as she zipped it up for me.
“There’s only one way to find out,” she smiled. “Your necklace looks really pretty with your dress.”
“Thanks. Conrad actually gave me the necklace, back when we first met.” I looked into the mirror, admiring the necklace. Every time I saw myself wearing it, the one thing I noticed more than anything was how the color of the stone matched my hair exactly.
“He’s kind of like your knight in shining armor.”
“He is,” I replied. “And more.”
I opened the door and saw Conrad was still fast asleep. I decided to let him rest and headed downstairs with Caroline. We stopped on the floor right below us, searching for something to eat for breakfast. What we saw when we reached the kitchen was a feast that had been lain out over the large island in the center of the room. We looked at each other and then back to the food.
“You think it would be ok for us to eat some of this?” Caroline was staring at a plate stacked high with pancakes and French toast.
“Help yourself to anything you see before you,” Noah answered. His sudden appearance caused both of us to jump, and he moved to stand right by Caroline.
“Thank you,” she answered, looking at him. Her cheeks flushed slightly. She reached out to grab a plate and before her hands grasped it, Noah picked it up.
“Here allow me,” he said, flashing a bright smile. He took the plate and moved closer to the food. “What would you like to eat?”
“Oh, just some pancakes and turkey bacon.” He piled the food on her plate and escorted her to the table, setting the plate in front of a chair. He pulled out a seat for her, beckoning her to sit down. She seated herself, and he pushed her chair in gently.
“Evey?” He said turning back to me.
“Oh, I can get it,” I said, grabbing a plate. “Why don’t you fix yourself a plate and then we can both join Caroline.” I smiled at him slightly, raising my eyebrows. For a second, his face was flushed with scarlet, matching the shirt he was wearing. We loaded our plates with pancakes, eggs, and bacon before joining Caroline at the table. I sat down in the seat to her left and Noah sat at the end of the table on her right side.
“I trust you both slept well?” I looked up at Noah, as he asked the question, and saw he was intently watching Caroline. He watched her hand as she swept a long strand of golden hair behind her ear. I stuffed my face with a bite of pancakes, forcing Caroline to answer his question.
“Yes, thank you.” She turned her head, meeting his gaze. “Your home is very beautiful.”
“It’s just a home,” he said, shrugging his shoulders. “I find that beauty in objects isn’t quite as deserving of notice as it is in people.” His green eyes fell over her face, appraising her features which seemed to be turning a very rosy color.
“Noah, I hope you don’t mind me asking, but I was wondering if the painting in my bedroom is a real Degas. It’s a very exquisite piece.”
“Yes, it is. I have quite a few pieces that should probably belong in a museum somewhere but I happen to be a tad bit selfish. It would seem I have a soft spot for art,” he said.
“Me too. Since my parents own an auction house, I got into art at a young age.”
“Remind me to show you the Rembrandt I have in my room later. It’s my favorite piece I own.”
“Thank you. I will,” I replied.
“So how exactly do you become a consiliarius?” I looked between Caroline and Noah, waiting for him to answer her question.
“Well you are chosen by God. The Concilium was once made of four men and three women, but after Aden killed Thea, only six of us remain.”
“Will God ever make another consiliarius? You know, to take Thea’s place?”
“I can’t say I really know the answer to that. He hasn’t made another consiliarius yet, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he won’t.”
I couldn’t help but think about what Conrad told me of Noah. He had experienced a lot of pain in his past, and I wondered what that pain might be or if it ever got any easier to bear with time. “What was your life like before Aden killed Thea? I mean the Concilium wasn’t always in hiding, were they?” I watched him eat as I waited for him to answer my question.
“No, we weren’t in hiding before he did that. Actually, we all lived in England, relatively close to one another. We were almost like a family, especially since we’d spent so many years together.”
“It must be hard to be separated from them,” Caroline replied. She stared at his hands that were stretched out on either side of his plate before locking her eyes with his.
“Does your family know you’re here right now?”
“No, they think I’m out of town with Evey and her mom. They don’t know what’s really going on.”
“So you would lie to your family to help protect your friend?”
“Evey is my family and I would do anything for her. Now that I know who she is, I know Mickey, Kit, and Guy would all want me here with her. Besides, she would do the same for me,” she said with absolute confidence.
A broad smile stretched over his face. “Spoken like a true secundae.” He took a drink of water, his eyes never turning from her. “Where’s Conrad this morning?”
Before I could open my mouth to speak, a voice answered his question from somewhere behind me.
“He’s in the shower,” Helen said, walking up to the table. Apparently, she favored slutty attire because she wore a tight pair of jeans with holes down the front and a black bra under a thin white tank top that covered nothing.
“Excuse me?” I turned in my chair to face her.
The look of triumph on her face made me want to punch her. “I heard the water running when I walked past his door just now.” She grabbed an apple from the table and threw it up in the air, catching it in her hands.
“Oh that’s right, he did say he wanted to take a shower when we were in bed this morning,” I said with an equally triumphant look. From the corner of my eye, I saw Caroline conceal a smile with her hand. For a second, Helen’s smug smile faded. However, she was quick to regain her air of superiority
before sitting in an empty seat at the table. She tossed the apple again and I found myself staring at it. I wondered where the seeds of the apple might be hidden. I could only hope I would remember their hiding place, and soon. Sensing I was watching her; she set the apple on the table and drew her hands back from it.
“So what’s the plan for the day?” Caroline’s voice was cheery, filling up the silence in the room that lingered around us.
“Well, we won’t be able to go to New York until tomorrow, so the day is pretty much yours,” Noah answered. “Is there something in particular you wanted to do?”
“I noticed last night you have a pretty extensive library,” I said to Noah. “Would you mind if I looked through some of it?”
“Not at all. You are guests here, and I want nothing more than for you to make yourselves feel at home.”
“Thanks,” I replied. “That’s very kind of you.”
“So, what are all of you talking about?” Conrad’s voice
sounded, as he walked into the room. He stood behind my chair, placing his hands on either side of me. He leaned in, almost touching our cheeks together. My eyes flashed to Helen. She was staring in my direction but it wasn’t me her gaze was fixed on, it was Conrad.
“Oh, we were just talking about what we should do today since we can’t leave for New York until tomorrow,” Caroline answered.
“Well, what did we decide on?”
“Nothing yet,” she replied.
“Here, let me fix you a plate,” I said, rising from my chair. He eased my chair back and followed me to the center of the room. He pointed to the dishes he wanted while I piled them onto his plate. I felt the touch of his hand at my waist, as his body pressed against mine. My eyes turned upward to meet his.
“You look really pretty today,” he said with a slight smile.
“Thanks.” I didn’t have to look back at the table to know Helen was watching us. I knew Conrad was aware she cared about him, but I wondered if he knew the extent of her feelings. I may not know their history together, but there was no doubting the way she looked at him; she loved him. I carried his plate back to the table and he sat at the end to my left.
“We could practice some more fighting techniques,” Conrad said, looking at Caroline, as he took a bite of eggs.
“I’d really like that.”
“Caroline is a natural fighter,” Conrad added, looking at Noah.
“Somehow, that doesn’t surprise me.” A broad smile covered Caroline’s face.
Conrad finished his food quickly and I carried everyone’s plates to the sink to be washed.
“Are you going to join us?”
He leaned against the sink as I loaded the plates into the dishwasher. He was dressed in a tight fitting white t-shirt and jeans. While Helen may be at the bottom of my list of favorite people, I couldn’t hold a grudge against her for staring at Conrad; he was certainly something to look at.