Secret Regrets (Living For Today #2)

by Megan C. Smith

  Snatching the other towel off the rod, Bryant huffed loudly then dried himself off before briskly leaving the bathroom without a word.

  I dried my hair and applied my makeup then went into the bedroom to get dressed. The room was empty when I walked out, and I couldn’t help the sigh that escaped my lips as I pulled on my lilac-colored satin dress. I attempted to reach around for the zipper on my back when two warm firm hands gripped my waist and pulled me into Bryant’s familiar embrace, the smell of his cologne hugging me.

  Kissing the hollow of my neck, he whispered, “I’m sorry, hun.”

  I leaned back into his hands as the zipper glided up to close my dress. After turning in his arms, I looked up into his eyes as they told me more than his words ever could.

  “It’s just the idea of someone hurting you. It makes me see red. It is my job to protect you from all the evil in this world, and when you get hurt, that is me failing. It kills me.”

  Swallowing the guilt, I thought of Darren and how it would kill Bryant if he knew. Sealing my mouth shut before I spilled my guts, I forced my lips to move upward in what I was hoping looked like a smile.

  “I’m a tough cookie, Bryant. Really – you need not worry about me, “I smoothly lied, placing a quick peck on his cheek. “But if we don’t get moving soon, you and I will both have to face the wrath of Leslie, and let me tell you, it won’t be a pretty sight!”

  Letting out a loud boisterous laugh, Bryant turned. He placed his hand on the small of my back as he ushered me out to the car.

  We pulled into the wedding venue with minutes to spare, thanks to Bryant’s erratic driving. The mirror flipped down with ease, giving me a small piece of my reflection to apply my lipstick. Once complete, I closed it back up and smacked my lips. “Ya know, dear, if you’re so worried about hurting me, maybe you should attempt to follow the laws of the road,” I teased.

  Laughing, Bryant looked back to me. “Rose dear, as long as I am behind the wheel and not you, we should be safe.”

  We laughed together as the valet opened my door and helped me out. “Low blow!” Smiling and laughing with carefree inhibitions, I weaved my arm into the crook of Bryant’s elbow, and we strolled into the venue to rehearse for next weekend’s wedding.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  MY ALARM SOUNDED MUCH TOO SOON after not having a reason to wake up early. I fumbled with my phone, trying to make the incessant buzzer stop. “Shut up, you stupid God-awful thing!” I grumbled, finally silencing the sound. Laying my head back on the soft pillow, I heard Bryant let out a throaty laugh.

  “God, I forgot how much you despise morning time. Go hop in the shower. I’ll make coffee and breakfast for you.” Bryant kissed me swiftly before slipping out of the bed.

  I peeked out in time to watch his lean body stride out of the room in his tight briefs that hugged his ass just enough to tempt me to yank him back into bed.

  Not having much time, I showered quickly to wake myself up and then threw on a robe and trudged downstairs to get some caffeine into my body. As soon as I stepped into the kitchen, a warm ceramic mug with steaming elixir filled to the brim was held out to me.

  “Oh, thank heavens,” I said, graciously accepting the mug and inhaling the sweet aroma of the mocha-flavored coffee.

  Bryant fried up some bacon and made a veggie omelet for each of us. “So you ready for your first day?” he asked after I’d retrieved my second cup of coffee.

  “Yeah, I think so. There are no kids yet, so today is mostly meetings and prepping my classroom, if I understood right,” I answered between sips.

  Eating my last piece of bacon, I stood to rinse off my plate, thanking Bryant for breakfast before heading back upstairs to get ready for work.

  PULLING IN TO INGRAM Elementary parking lot, I felt all my nerves and excitement come to a head. My phone buzzed, breaking my focus on the school. I pulled it out and saw a text message that instantaneously eased me.

  B: You’ll be fine! Get out of the car and go inside. Love you, always and forever.

  Pulling in a deep breath, I grabbed my box of stuff I thought I would need and headed toward my future. Before I had even walked all the way into the lobby area, Becky was out of her seat, smiling and cheerfully greeting me.

  “Oh, Ms. Barnes, perfect timing. I will take you to your classroom to settle in before the team meetings begin.” She held the next door open for me then led me into the school grounds and maze of hallways.

  Ingram Elementary was a well-kept school. Most of the main structure encompassed the original brick buildings, their walls all painted white with red detailing. Along the main hallway was a large mural of a classroom with a quote. “The stepping stones to life begin here”. Seemed a bit deep for elementary schoolers, but Principal Sullivan probably expected a few students to leave here with college admissions.

  “Here you are, dear,” Becky said, holding my classroom door open for me to step inside.

  Oh my. My classroom. A huge smile filled my face as I looked around at the blank canvas I’d been entrusted with. The small wooden desks were arranged in orderly rows facing the whiteboard, flanked by two corkboards. I made my way to the back corner still in awe and set my box atop a large metal desk. Mine, this classroom was all mine.

  Turning to Becky, I noticed her eyes were a bit misty as she cleared her throat.

  “Aw, I forgot what a beautiful sight seeing a new teacher come in was. Reminds me of a child’s first trip to see Disneyworld.”

  Letting out a laugh, I walked back over to where she stood. “Oh, Becky. This may be better,” I whisper conspiratorially. “I just can’t believe I’ve finally made it here. I am so excited.”

  Becky took my hand in hers and spun us toward the door. “Yes, well, let’s get you introduced to the team leader for the second grade teachers so you can get to your meeting on time.”

  After walking a few doors down, we stepped into another classroom, this one all ready for the approaching school year with books and alphabet posters. The teacher’s desk had handmade items from past students that made me even more hopeful for the year ahead. As the door clicked behind us, a tall lanky man turned around, smile on his face so wide his dimples showed.

  Stepping forward, he extended his hand toward me. “Hello. You must be Ms. Barnes. Becky has told me all about you!”

  Feeling myself blushing profusely, I nodded. “Yes, I am. It is a pleasure to meet you, Mr…”

  “Oh gosh. Excuse me. I seem to have forgotten my manners. I am Ian Petty, the team leader for our grade level.”

  As I looked into his blue eyes, a weird feeling passed through me, making my smile falter. Quickly catching myself, I plastered it back on, unable to place the feelings running rampant through me as perspiration gathered on my neck.

  “Mr. Petty, I look forward to working with you. I feel like we have met before, but I just can’t seem to place you,” I discreetly inquired, hoping he’d end up being a friend of Bryant’s or Grant’s.

  “Ian, please, and no, I don’t believe I have had the pleasure,” he said with a wink that made my skin crawl.

  Before we could continue our conversation, more teachers stepped in, and Becky excused herself, saying she’d talk with me after the day was through. Taking a seat at a small table, the other teachers introduced themselves, rolling out the welcome mat and making me feel at ease.

  After an hour of talking about plans and curriculum, we received our student lists and were free to go back to our classrooms to start preparing for students we’d meet in a few weeks’ time. As I walked back down to my classroom, the unnerving tingle sensation returned.

  “Ms. Barnes, wait up,” Ian’s smooth voice called from behind. “I am coming to help set up since you are a bit behind.”

  Embarrassed that I was behind, despite no fault of my own, I nodded. This guy was a teacher and seemed to have the respect of the faculty. Shoving down my illogical feelings, I reminded myself this man was a stranger to me, and I should not pass judgment.


  In no time at all, Ian and I were chatting effortlessly about the school and staff. He enjoyed the gossip much more that I’d have ever guessed as he divulged everyone’s secrets he was privy to. Note to self: Don’t ever confide in this man.

  “Well, I think that covers it. I am going to run to the store and grab some items I would like to have for the classroom, but I feel much more prepared now. Thank you so much for taking the time to help me, Mr. Petty.” Smiling, I turned to realize he was much closer than I’d realized.

  “Ian. The pleasure was all mine, Rose.” His tongue caressed my name a bit too much as he spoke it aloud.

  “A lot of the faculty goes up to this little pub up the road. Maybe you’ll be able to join us this Friday. We can give you the scoop on the students you’ll be getting.”

  “I’ll have to speak to my fiancé, but it would be lovely to be able to socialize with everyone off campus.” I said, hoping the mention of Bryant would put a little bubble around me and remove him from my personal space.

  “Of course. I hope you can. It will help you tremendously to become friends with the rest of the staff,” he advised, before leaving me alone in my classroom.

  As soon as he left, I felt my body relax tenfold. I hadn’t even realized I was so on guard with him in there. I just couldn’t place where I knew him from, but I was sure I had met him before. While Ian may have been a well-groomed, nicely dressed man, every red flag in my mind was warning me to be careful.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  THE FIRST WEEK OF CLASSROOM PREP passed without further incident, and I’d done my best to avoid Ian. It wasn’t that he had done anything in particular; in fact, he’d been extremely helpful and courteous to me. It was just an eerie feeling that washed over me anytime he was near.

  “Hello, earth to Rose,” Leslie called behind me.

  Spinning in my salon chair, I turned to see Leslie finished with hair and makeup. She was positively glowing, looking like the most beautiful bride in history. Her hair was elegantly pinned up, and small curls escaped. Her makeup was lightly done with a sheer shimmer, making her sparkle like the diamond on her left finger.

  “Leslie, you look stunning. Grant is going to hit the floor. I’m going to text Bryant and warn him to be ready to catch him.”

  We both giggled.

  “I can’t believe this day is here. I dreamed it. I wanted it. I just didn’t think I ever deserved the happily ever after,” Leslie whispered breathlessly.

  I gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “Nobody deserves it more!”

  My hair and makeup was done shortly thereafter, and Hayley and Shandi were waiting out in the front by the limo for us to head back to hotel’s bridal suite.

  Inside the limo, we all toasted with champagne glasses, giggling like school girls as we gushed over Leslie’s makeup and hair. Before we knew it, the car had come to a stop, and the driver was opening the door for us to slip back out.

  After swiping my keycard, I held the door open for the girls to stroll in. Grant had set up the reservations and had the room overflowing with white roses. I spotted a card on the entry table and handed it to Leslie. Seeing she was already tearing up, I read it aloud to her.

  To my beautiful bride—

  The day you become mine fully is finally here. I can still remember seeing you at that fall festival playing on your phone without a care in the world. As soon as our eyes met, my heart filled with love, and I just wanted to steal you away. I will love you forever, cherish you always, and never let you go. I’ll be waiting for you at the end of the aisle, so hurry up!

  Love, your groom

  Shandi and Hayley were both wiping away tears while trying to not ruin their makeup, and we all hugged one another, bubbling over with giddiness and joy for the day. A knock at the door broke the tension.

  “I’ll get it,” I announced, grabbing my handkerchief to dab my eyes. Thank God, the makeup artist had made sure she’d used the best water-resistant mascara, or we’d all look like raccoons by the time of the ceremony.

  Opening the door, I locked eyes on a brilliant set of emerald ones staring back at me. Squealing, I leaped into his arms and wrapped myself around his strong muscular form. “Oh my God! Jordan!” I exclaimed.

  His arms encircled me, as he held me for dear life. I felt his body shake, and he laughed at my enthusiasm.

  While Jordan set me down, he continued to hold me close and stared into my eyes. “I have missed you so much, Rose. So. Damn. Much.” Leaning down, he placed an innocent kiss on my forehead.

  Behind us, I could hear Shandi and Hayley whispering. They’d met Jordan at FSU and knew our history, or at least how it had appeared to everyone on the outside.

  Stepping back to put some distance between us, I saw the confusion on Jordan’s face. I raked my eyes over him, admiring his perfectly pressed Navy Dress White uniform. It fit his body flawlessly, enhancing every muscle I knew was beneath it. Unbelievably, he looked to be in even better shape than when he left to go to the service. Goodness, he looks delicious.

  Leslie shoved past me to hug Jordan, knocking me out of my trance. “Jordan! You made it! Grant is going to be thrilled. What are you doing here, though? The boys are downstairs.”

  “Yeah, I was coming to deliver the champagne for you girls and just wanted to check on my favorite roomie real quick,” he replied, waving a hand at the room service cart as he looked over her shoulder at me.

  I felt my face flush when his eyes met mine.

  “Well, you can see her at the reception. Go spend some quality time with Bryant and Grant,” she chided, shoving him out of the threshold and shutting the door. Before she could twirl back around, another knock sounded at the door.

  “What?” Leslie demanded as she slung the door open.

  “It’s time to get ready, dear,” Leslie’s mom announced, stepping into the room already dressed and ready to go.

  Leslie quickly hugged her mom before locking arms with me to go get in her big poufy wedding dress. Although she loved her parents unconditionally, she was accustomed to it just being her and me. She’d insisted I would be the one to help her through the milestones of life.

  Leslie had a go-big-go-home personality, and her dress fit her personality precisely. Once we had it pulled up, I began buttoning the hundred-plus buttons on the back, cursing her for not going with one that tied or zipped. Just as my fingers went numb, I buttoned the last one, and Leslie twirled around, letting the dress billow out as she spun. She was a princess if I ever I’d seen one. The hand embroidery on the corset top and layers and layers of tulle that created a huge skirt was exquisite, and my smile overtook my face as I once again dabbed away stray tears. Slipping on her garter and heels, she was ready to go marry the man of her dreams.

  AS I WALKED UP the aisle, I felt a pair of eyes on me. A blush creeped up my cheeks when my eyes met my partner’s, the ones I wanted to look into for the rest of my life. A pair of chocolate eyes that saw straight to my heart and soul, owning me. Returning a smile, I made my way up rest of the aisle, dreaming of the day it would be Bryant and me saying our vows to one another.

  When I reached the front of the church, the bridal march began playing, and Leslie glided down the aisle toward Grant. She looked so calm and at peace with it all. My high-strung friend was settling down, and I couldn’t be happier for them. As they promised each other forever, my eyes teared up, and I looked across the way to find Bryant. He was wiping under his eye and smirked at me when he’d apparently realized I’d caught him crying at his best friend’s wedding.

  “I love you,” he mouthed to me as Leslie and Grant sealed their fate with a kiss.

  Applause broke out in the ballroom as the priest presented Mr. and Mrs. Grant Archer. I linked my arm with Bryant’s to exit the ceremony area, feeling so overjoyed for our best friends.

  Bryant leaned down and kissed me behind my ear quickly. He whispered, “That will be us very soon. I can’t wait to make you Mrs. Matthews.”

  Th
e photographer snapped photos like paparazzi as we were assembled in different groups. Finally, after what felt like hours of flashing lights and clicking shutters, we were able to head to the reception and start the party. Leslie had bedazzled the ballroom into a glittery confection. It sparkled and caught the light and made me feel like I was living inside a diamond. It was the epitome of Leslie, flashy and glitzy.

  As she and Grant danced their first dance as man and wife, Bryant pulled me into his hips, my back to his front, and swayed our bodies together as one until we were called to join them on the dance floor. His hands resting on my hips heated the skin beneath the thin satin dress I was wearing, and his breath warmed my neck. He pulled back and twirled me slowly, and I smiled as I spun under his arm, feeling more carefree and at peace than I had in quite a while.

  After taking our seats, Bryant and I turned to where we could see out into the reception. Feeling eyes on me, I glanced up to see Jordan watching me closely, drink in hand and a forlorn expression on his face. It seemed he was so entranced, he was ignoring the women fawning over him in his Navy uniform and offering themselves up on a platter. As his eyes met mine, a smile grew on his face, making his green eyes sparkle. On second thought, maybe that was the effects of the alcohol in his hand.

  “I want you,” Bryant’s husky voice whispered in my ear, making my skin cover in goose bumps. I felt my body come alive and beg for his touch as he nuzzled.

  “I want you too, but if we leave, Leslie will kill us.”

  A growl came from Bryant’s throat, and his hands ran over my body. “Let me worry about the logistics of this,” he confidently said. He turned and pulled me toward the door leading out of the reception. On the way out, he stopped to whisper God knows what in the ear of another one of Grant’s groomsmen, although, judging by the smug expression on his face as his eyes moved to me, I could easily guess.