Dream a Little Dream

by Joan Jonker

  While Jessie filled the teacups, Aggie set two big plates in the middle of the table and plonked herself down. She pushed a lock of her white hair behind her ear, hoisted her ample bosom, then leaned her elbows on the table. She glanced across to see the look of love being exchanged between Alf and his wife, and she couldn’t help feeling sad. They were both as thin as rakes, and it just didn’t seem fair. If you put the two of them together they wouldn’t come up to her weight. ‘Muck in, Alf, and pretend ye’re at yer granny’s. There’s ten scones so it works out at two each.’

  ‘That’s right, love, you muck in as Aggie said. We only get twenty minutes’ break, and there’s five of those minutes gone already.’ Kitty could feel her mouth watering as she spread the best butter on to a scone. It was melting as she put it on, and she gave her husband a dig. ‘This is the gear, isn’t it, eh? Aren’t yer glad Mr Robert invited yer for the day?’

  Alf didn’t answer straight away. There was a look of pure bliss on his face as he tasted best butter for the first time in years. Then he nodded. ‘I’ve got a lot to thank your boss for. It’s a treat enough just getting out of our house for the day and being driven in a posh car like a proper toff. But to be able to walk in a lovely garden, and be fed like a king, well, it really is something.’

  ‘I’ve told Alf that Mr Robert wouldn’t mind him coming down now and again if he enjoys it so much.’ There was butter trickling down Pete’s chin and he wiped it away with the back of his hand. ‘What do you think, Aggie?’

  ‘Mr Robert wouldn’t mind in the least, he’d be only too pleased that someone was getting enjoyment out of the garden. But it’s not him yer’d have to worry about, is it? If Miss Edwina got wind of it, she’d probably have something to say. Yer know what a miserable cow she is, she wouldn’t give yer a drink if yer were dying of thirst.’

  Kitty’s head was nodding vigorously. ‘Or the lend of last night’s Echo! She’d even stop yer breathing in the fresh air if she could.’ A smile of mischief crossed her face. ‘Hands up all those who wouldn’t shed a tear if she stopped breathing? And no bleedin’ lies, either!’

  Alf pointed a stiffened finger at her. ‘Now that wasn’t a very nice thing to say, love. There’s many a true word spoken in jest.’

  ‘Oh, I think God will forgive her this time, Alf,’ Agnes said. ‘Perhaps she shouldn’t have said anything so drastic, but if the truth’s known, there’s not one person in this kitchen who even likes the woman of the house. We all love and admire her husband, but we can’t stand her because she thinks she’s better than anyone else.’

  Pete, who had never been known to gossip or criticise anyone, nodded his head. ‘I don’t wish her dead, I just wish she lived somewhere else.’ His eyes lighted on Agnes. ‘By the way, Aggie, the carrots yer wanted are outside. They’re not a bad size, either. And yer’ve got Alf to thank, ’cos he picked them.’

  Kitty gaped. ‘Yer didn’t, did yer, love? Oh, I hope yer haven’t been overdoing it ’cos I don’t want you laid up sick.’

  ‘He hasn’t been overdoing it, Kitty, I made sure of that,’ Pete said. ‘It’s not hard work picking carrots, it doesn’t require any strength.’

  ‘Anyway, take a look at yer husband, sunshine,’ Aggie said. ‘He’s got colour in his cheeks which he didn’t have before.’

  ‘Do I get a say in this?’ Alf laughed. ‘If anyone is interested in how I feel in meself, I can honestly say I’ve never felt so well for a long time. I love being in the garden, Pete is a smashing feller to work with, and to top it off, Aggie’s scones really are something to write home about.’

  ‘That just leaves me and Jessie,’ Kitty said. ‘Can’t yer think of anything nice to say about us two?’

  ‘That’s easy, I don’t have to think. You are the love of my life and I wouldn’t part with yer, not even for Jean Harlow. And as for Jessie, she’s pretty enough to be on the lid of a box of Cadbury’s chocolates. Does that satisfy yer, pet?’

  Kitty gave it some thought before looking at the young girl. ‘I think I’m happy with that, queen, but what about you?’

  ‘Ooh, yeah, I’ll say!’ Jessie rolled her big blue eyes. ‘I mean, Cadbury’s are the best chocolates yer can buy, aren’t they?’

  ‘It’s that bleedin’ long since I tasted any chocolate, queen, I wouldn’t know. But I’ll give yer a little compliment meself. As soon as I clapped eyes on yer I knew we were going to get on. It’s a pleasure working with yer.’

  Jessie’s face lit up. ‘It’s a pleasure working with you, Kitty, and Aggie. I’ve only been here a few days and already we’re mates.’

  Agnes glanced at the clock. Time was marching on, and if Miss Edwina came in now there’d be hell to pay. But there was one thing she felt she had to say. And it was to the young girl who had fitted in so well in so short a time. ‘It would be a hard one to please what didn’t like yer. Yer haven’t said a word out of place, or put a foot wrong, since the hour yer started. And there’s not many young ones yer can say that about. So welcome to the family, sunshine, and long may you reign.’ Her palms flat on the table, she pushed herself up. ‘It’s back to the grind now, so get moving. Except you, Alf, yer can sit here as long as yer like.’

  He shook his head. ‘I’ll go with Pete and get some fresh air while I can. I’m beholden to yer for feeding me, Aggie, I appreciate it.’

  ‘I’ll be feeding yer again at lunchtime, and then on our afternoon break. In fact, by the end of the day yer’ll be sick of the sight of me.’

  ‘Never in a million years, Aggie! How could I ever be sick of someone who has been so kind to my wife for the last five years. I think ye’re a hero.’ He bent to kiss Kitty. ‘I’ll see yer later, love.’

  ‘Ay, hang on a minute.’ Agnes banged a fist on the table causing the cups to rattle in the saucers. ‘How come, if I’m the hero, she’s the one what gets the kiss? I’d say that was not flamin’ well fair! Or as Mr Nigel would say, that’s not cricket, old boy!’

  With a grin on his thin, but still handsome face, Alf walked around the table. ‘I did think of it, Aggie, but I thought if I attempted to kiss yer, yer’d clock me one.’

  ‘Kisses off men are short in my life, Alf, so help yerself.’ Agnes tilted her head and offered a cheek. And when she felt his lips, her round chubby face broke into a smile. ‘Made my day that has! I’ll have to think of something tasty for yer lunch.’

  Pete poked his head back into the kitchen. ‘We’ll have no favouritism here, Aggie. What he gets, we all get.’

  ‘Sod off, Pete, and go and see to yer potato patch. Yer’ll get what ye’re given and like it.’ Agnes hugged herself and smiled at Kitty. ‘It’s nice to have friends, isn’t it, sunshine?’

  ‘It certainly is, queen, yer can’t beat it.’

  Jessie rocked on her chair, looking relaxed and happy. ‘I’ve really enjoyed meself today. I’m going to like working here.’

  Robert turned in Balfour Road and slowed down to glance at the house the family had lived in before moving to Mossley Hill. He’d been happy there, with a wife who still loved him. She’d started to put on a few airs and graces, but he hadn’t thought anything of it. After all, moving from a tiny house to a six-roomed one was a step up in the world and most women would have felt proud.

  As he pulled up outside the Jamiesons’ house, Robert shook his head. It was ridiculous to blame the house for the change in his wife. If a person had their feet on the ground, money didn’t change their personality. Anyway, what had brought these thoughts into his head? He’d had seventeen years to get used to his wife’s coldness, and she couldn’t humiliate or hurt him any more because he’d gone past caring. So it was useless to dwell on what might have been.

  Beryl Jamieson opened the door with a towel in her hand. ‘Bob, it’s lovely to see you! Come on in, yer don’t need to stand there like a lemon waiting to be asked.’ When he was in the hall, she closed the door behind him. ‘Go through to the living room and I can talk to yer while I finish taking some clothes
out of the dolly tub.’

  ‘Have I come at a bad time?’

  ‘Don’t be daft, I’m always happy to see yer.’ Beryl was the same age as Robert, but she’d kept her slender figure and pretty face. Her fair hair was peppered with strands of grey, but they were the only signs of middle age. ‘It’ll take me five minutes to finish off in the kitchen, then I’ll make a cuppa and yer can fill me in with yer news.’

  Robert laid his bowler hat on the sideboard and took a seat on the couch. ‘I don’t need a reason to call on you, I do it because we’re old friends. But I have a special reason today.’

  Beryl came through from the kitchen. ‘Blow the washing, I’ll do it later. Yer’ve got me interested now. What’s so special about today’s visit?’

  ‘Abbie is pestering me to bring her down to see Milly. She’s got a bee in her bonnet about it and I’ll get no peace until she has her way.’

  Beryl leaned forward and rested her elbows on her knees. ‘Why now, Bob, after all this time? It’s been ten years.’

  ‘That’s my fault entirely. You see, she didn’t know I’d been visiting you over the years and see Milly quite often. When I told her last week she was surprised, and her surprise quickly turned to wanting to see her old pal again.’

  Beryl sat back in the chair. ‘Doesn’t Edie know yer come, either? Has she got so big for her boots she’s forgotten all the old friends she knew?’

  Robert nodded. ‘Ever since we moved to Mossley Hill, if I mention Arthur Street or Balfour Road she clams up tight and refuses to discuss it. I have told you over the years that our marriage isn’t perfect, but the truth is, we haven’t any marriage at all. She’s my wife and I really don’t like talking about her, but right now I think you deserve an explanation. And I think I’d better begin at the beginning.’ He gave a deep sigh. ‘Before the war started, I’d worked like hell to build the business up. And we were doing well. When Victoria was born, and two years later, Nigel, I was able to give Edie enough money for everything she wanted. And I could afford to give my mam and dad a few bob each week. Life was good, even though I was working all the hours God sent. Then the war started and me and Jeff were expecting to be called up any time. But in nineteen fifteen, they didn’t call us up, they requisitioned the horse and cart, with Jeff and myself, for war work. Which meant transporting war materials from factories to the docks. There was more to it than that, but I won’t go into details or I’ll be here all day. We were paid handsomely for it, so I’m not complaining. And it meant we weren’t in the firing line like thousands of other poor buggers.’

  Robert reached into his top pocket and took out a cigar. ‘Do you mind, Beryl?’

  ‘Not at all, you make yerself at home.’

  ‘You may remember it was in nineteen fifteen, when Edie was pregnant with Abbie, that we moved into this road. She was delighted, and I was glad to have been in a position to afford it. But there was a war on and everyone had to pull their weight, so I was working all hours and saw little of my wife and children. I remember thinking Edie seemed to be changing, becoming more aloof and a bit hoity-toity, but I thought it was just a phase and she’d grow out of it. However, as time went by, our relationship went from bad to worse. If I went near her she would move away, as if she couldn’t bear to be close to me.’ Robert was quiet for a while, watching the smoke from his cigar spiral towards the ceilling. Then in a voice that told of his despair, he continued. ‘The final break came after Abbie was born. I wasn’t allowed to touch her and in bed she turned from me as though I was a leper. I stupidly put it down to her being depressed after the birth, and assumed that as time went by we would get back to normal. It wasn’t to be, though, and we haven’t lived as man and wife for seventeen years.’

  Beryl gasped. ‘The bitch! I always thought she was a cold-hearted snob, but I didn’t think she was that bad.’

  ‘There’s worse to come, Beryl, I’m afraid. You see, I was so busy during the war I didn’t have much time for visiting, but I always popped into my mam’s whenever I could. And at the same time I’d call to see Edie’s parents, Ada and Joe. I was only ever there a few minutes because I wanted to spend as much time as I could with my children. I was never at home during the day, but I took it for granted that my wife would be visiting her parents regularly and taking the children. It never dawned on me that she never went near them. Anyway, when the war was over, I didn’t have a business any more and had to start again from scratch. I still had Jeff with me, thank God, and the pair of us worked our socks off for the next five years until we had a thriving business. I was so busy I didn’t have time to fret over the state of my marriage, hoping it would sort itself out eventually. And with this in mind, I bought the house in Mossley Hill. As you know, by this time my mam and dad had died, leaving a big gap in my life. The horse and cart had gone, too, to make way for motorised vans. And as I was able to employ men to do the hard graft, and Jeff was there to supervise the whole operation, I decided it was time to take an interest in my home and family. Unfortunately I had left it too late, because my house was not a home, my wife was not a wife and my children didn’t know what it was like to have a mother’s love.’

  Beryl leaned forward and touched his knee. ‘Bob, take a break and I’ll put the kettle on.’

  He shook his head. ‘I’d rather get it off my chest now I’ve started. You see I’ve been blaming myself for all of this, and it’s been hell living with the guilt. But I will no longer take the blame because the only thing I’ve done wrong is to work like a slave to give my family the best. And I mean the best. Sadly, in the process I have lost my wife and my eldest daughter. You wouldn’t know them now, Beryl, they’ve changed completely. My wife thought the name Edie wasn’t grand enough, so she’s now Edwina. She and Victoria are the biggest snobs you are ever likely to meet. If you aren’t rich, they would look down their noses at you. Both are cold, conniving and humourless. When I tell you Edie hasn’t been to visit her parents for nearly seventeen years, it will give you an idea of what she’s like. And Victoria is exactly the same. Neither of them would be seen dead in Arthur Street, or Balfour Road.’

  Beryl gasped. ‘I don’t believe it! Never been to see her parents? How could she be so cruel, Bob?’

  ‘I didn’t know for years, Beryl, because Ada and Joe never mentioned it. They used to ask after her and the children, but I thought nothing of it. When we moved to Mossley Hill I used to ask Edie if she’d been to Seaforth, but she always had the excuse there was too much work to do in the big house. And she got away with it because I was too busy making money to see what was happening in my own family. But I finally blew my top last week and told her I still visited the old neighbours and her mother and father. I tried to get through to her that Ada and Joe are old now and the least she can do is visit them while there’s still a chance. And it was her reaction to this that finally killed any respect I had for her. She looked at me as though I was a stranger and said she thought her parents would be dead by now.’

  ‘Oh, my God, what’s wrong with the woman? She’s not normal! No daughter with any feelings at all would want to forget their parents!’

  ‘There’s worse to come, my dear. She has led our three children to think their grandparents are dead. Abbie and Nigel would be devastated if they knew the truth. Victoria, unfortunately, is like her mother, a complete snob. Any mention of coming from a two-up, two-down would have her reaching for the smelling salts.’ Robert smiled, but there was no warmth in it. ‘I’m sorry to burden you with my problems, Beryl, but I need to get it off my chest to someone, and you were always a good listener.’

  ‘Look, I’m going to put the kettle on, Bob, so you sit back and light another cigar. I’ve loads of questions to ask yer.’

  Robert reached for the cigar case in the inside pocket of his coat. It was when he put a hand in his suit pocket for the clipper that he thought of Maureen. He’d taken a very short time to choose her present. They had a wide selection at Boodle & Dunthorne’s but one of the
first lockets the assistant brought for his inspection was the one he knew instinctively would be her choice. Not too plain and not too fancy. He had left it to have both their names engraved on the back and would pick it up in a week’s time. If only things were different, how happy he would be to spend the rest of his life with her. She would give him the warmth and love everyone needs in their life. Instead, he had to be content with a few hours every fourth Wednesday.

  Beryl came bustling in. ‘I’m sorry I’ve got no cakes to offer yer, Bob, but I haven’t been to the shops today.’

  ‘A cup of tea is fine.’ Robert extended his hand and relieved her of the cup and saucer. ‘I can’t stay much longer because I want to make my usual two calls to Arthur Street. And before I do, I need to stop at the tobacconist’s shop by the Gainsborough to get tobacco and cigarettes for the men, and a mixture of sweets for the ladies.’

  ‘You’re a good bloke, Bob, and yer deserve a lot more happiness from life than ye’re getting. Don’t yer think it’s time to put things straight?’

  ‘I intend doing that, my dear. The children have every right to know about their grandma and grandad, and, God knows, Ada and Joe have a right to see the only family they have left. How I will do it I don’t know because it is going to come as a shock to the children. Victoria I have no fear about, because she and her mother are as thick as thieves and wild horses wouldn’t drag either of them to Seaforth. But my worry is that Nigel and Abbie will turn against Edie for keeping the truth from them. I wouldn’t like that to happen, but for my own sanity I have to do what I think is right.’

  ‘Yer’ll have to put yer house in order before Abbie comes down here, Bob, because Milly might let it slip. She knows yer see Edie’s folk, ’cos she’s asked me a few times why yer couldn’t bring Abbie to see her when yer were down this way. I told her, which I thought was right, that she probably had new friends now. I wasn’t to know any different, and Milly wouldn’t see any harm in asking Abbie the same question.’ Beryl leaned across to put her empty cup on the table. ‘And that’s no way for the girl to find out she still has grandparents. It would be a big shock for her and that wouldn’t be fair.’