I watch her walk back through the gate just as the cab I ordered pulls up at the side of the pavement, “Taylor?”
If I get inside the cab then I can most likely wave goodbye to ever fixing things with her. If I don’t go back in there then we’ll most probably never work things out. I need to make a decision.
I stand and look over to her house before my eyes land back on the cab. Taking a couple of moments to think, I glance between the two again, and then take a deep breath. Whatever I decide is gonna seal my fate and our future.
Raking both of my hands through my hair, I grab my wallet, and turn back around before walking slowly over to the cab. Reaching my hand out, I pull open the passenger side door.
There’s really no other way this can play out.
***
“You came back,” she says when she sees me standing on the other side of the threshold. Yeah, I did. I’ve only ever had one option, and that’s to have Alexis and our baby by my side. Forever.
“I don’t wanna run away anymore,” I walk by her and into the hallway. “But, I do need you to know a couple of things.”
Her father is standing at the bottom of the stairs, and throwing me a scrutinizing gaze. Yeah, I came back. Diane walks up behind him, and smiles at me with a warmth in her eyes. I like her. It seems that she’s pretty clued up, after all. I turn back around and notice Alexis’ eyes are bright red from her tears. She’s watching me while gently rubbing her hands over her baby bump.
Alright. This is it. Moment of truth. I reach out and take a hold of both of her hands. Her gaze drops a little before she brings her attention back on me, and I know I’ve gotta tell her what’s going on in my mind.
“I’m never gonna give up trying to get you back,” I start, making sure she hears me by lifting one of my hands away from hers and placing it on her chin. She needs to see into my eyes when I say this because I need her to believe every damn word that I’m about to say. “For every single day that I’m alive, I’m gonna be fighting to make you mine again. I fucked up before, I know I did, but I swear to God she meant nothing and I’m repulsed that I even sunk that low. I wasn’t myself, we both know that. If I knew about anything that was going on that night, then you know just as well as I do that it would never have happened. I’m nothing without you, Alexis. I’m nothing. I need to be in your life, and I need you in mine.”
Her lips are trembling, and I can feel her hands shaking in mine, “Dad, um …”
“We’ll be in the kitchen,” he places a kiss on her cheek as he walks by us, but doesn’t turn around or even acknowledge me. That’s fine by me. I need Alexis to be the one to forgive me, not him.
When he closes the door to give us some privacy, she turns to face me again, and it takes her a couple of seconds to get her words out, “Did you mean it? What you said about never giving up your fight for me?”
“Every goddamn word, beautiful.” I answer, and my knees start to buckle while I wait for her to say something.
“You don’t need to fight anymore because I can’t just be friends with you either. I want us to be a family. You, me, and our baby. It will take time for me to be able to be with you … like that, but if you’re okay with that then—”
“You’re taking me back?” I choke out my question because I really hadn’t expected it to go this way. “You won’t regret it, Alexis. You won’t regret this, I swear.”
“Make sure I don’t.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
It’s sunny outside. Are you surprised? Well, I’m not so much. But, that might be because it’s a pretty great day to be me. What have I got to be so happy about? Well, I’ve just handed my apartment keys back over to Layla, and at this very second, I’m walking along the pathway to Alexis’ home. Oh, I’m sorry. Let me rephrase that. I’m walking along the pathway to our home.
We’ve talked on the phone every day for the past couple of weeks, and once Alexis’ father and Diane headed back to Salem yesterday morning, she asked me to go and see her. She wants things to be settled before our baby arrives, and so here I am. Bags by my side, and ready to move in.
Paul and Diane decided to spend a couple of weeks in the city, instead of just the one night like they’d originally planned. They wanted to make sure that Alexis was okay, which I can totally understand, and thankfully, her father accepted that she’s decided to give me another chance. So, yeah. I’m moving in.
I could tell from the way she both sounded and looked that her father wasn’t overly impressed, but it wasn’t his decision to make. It was hers, and she made the right one. No. She made the only one. There really wasn’t any other way this could’ve gone because we’re made for each other, and she knows this just as well as I do.
“Morning,” I say brightly as soon as she swings open the front door.
“Hi,” she opens the door a little wider and steps to the side. “Was Layla okay with you handing your keys back at such short notice?”
“No, I think she’s gonna miss me being around the place, but I did leave her a photograph on the nightstand. You know, something to remember me by. It should keep her going for a little while,” I wink at her and step inside. “You look good.” I add when I turn back around, and I don’t make it any secret that my eyes are roaming over her, taking her in. She always looks good.
She doesn’t say anything to this, and instead, she points down to the couple of cases I’ve just placed by the wall, “Is that everything?”
“Yep,” I stand straighter and place my hands on my waist, but all I really wanna do is wrap my arms around her. I’m not so sure if it would be a good idea for me to do this just yet, though. She’s already told me that things won’t be able to go back to how they were before. That it’s gonna take time. The silence between us as we stand and stare at each other is becoming a little too intense. “I’ll go and throw my things upstairs and outta the way. Which way’s the bedroom?”
“The second along on the right.” She answers with a smile, and slowly follows me toward the stairs, stopping by the bottom step as I make my way up to the first floor.
Second on the right. Second on the ... Here it is.
I open up the door, take a step inside, and then, well, I’m starting to feel a little confused. While placing my bags down by the window, I glance around, my main focus being on the bed. I’m sure I’ve gotten the right room. Maybe she’s the one who got confused, “Hey, Alexis! Can you come up here for a second?” I turn around when I hear her footsteps behind me, and see her standing in the doorway. “You said the second room along …” My voice trails into a silence when I see the look that’s now washing over her face. She breaks our gaze and wraps her arms tightly around herself. “Right.” I didn’t make a mistake. The single bed threw me a little bit, but her facial expression has just made it perfectly clear. Separate rooms. Gotcha.
“Just while we’re getting to know each other again,” she tries to smile. “I need to be able to fully trust you before we sleep together, um …” I drop my gaze to the floor, and nod my head a couple of times so she can see that I understand, but, I can’t hide the fact that I’m disappointed. I knew things weren’t gonna be exactly the same, but now it feels like we’re just sharing a house together as roomies, not as a couple. This is gonna be hard. Really fucking hard.
“So, um … where do you sleep?” I ask, turning fully away from her now while trying not to show her that I’m anything but happy and okay with this. If I make a big deal outta the separate rooms thing then it’s not gonna make things any better for us. I’m just gonna have to suck it up and accept what she’s willing to give to me, however big or small that might be.
“In the room next door.” She answers before heading back out. I glance to my bags, then around the room, and then back on my bags before sitting myself down on the edge of the bed.
Baby steps. Time. I can do that. I’m gonna have to.
It doesn’t take me long to unpack my things, and just as I’m about to head back do
wnstairs, I hear a couple of knocks over on the bedroom door, “Are you almost done?” She asks while passing me over a glass of orange juice.
“Yeah, I was just on my way back down to see if you’ve gotten any plans for the rest of the day,” I smile as I accept the drink from her.
While I was sitting on the bed, it suddenly occurred to me. After all the shit we’ve been through, we haven’t even been a proper date yet. Not a single one. We would’ve on the day I planned the picnic and everything else after that, but, well, that didn’t work out, did it? She’s having my baby in less than two months’ time, yet we haven’t even experienced a first date together.
I notice that she’s trying to take a sneak peek around the door, and when she sees me catch her, she starts to look a little embarrassed, “What?”
“Nothing! I just …um, I just wanted to see how you’ve done your room, that’s all,” I step to the side and she walks by me. When she takes in the room, she turns back around and throws me a quizzical look. “You moved the bed?”
“If I’d have left it where it was then it would’ve messed with my Chi. Just following the Feng Shui rules, Alexis,” I shrug my shoulders and she starts to laugh, a new brightness entering her eyes. There she is. I love the way she smiles. It gets me every time.
“You’re such a dork!” she taps my arm lightly and laughs. She thinks I’m a dork? Well, that may be so, but it sure helped put a smile back on her face. Honestly? I moved the bed closer to the far wall so I would be closer to her each night. Yeah, I know, but as they say, desperate times call for desperate measures. As she walks further inside the room, I notice her face fall, and when I see what she’s looking at, I clear my throat to try and get her attention back. “That was a good day.” She picks up the picture frame that’s holding a photograph of the two of us, and I see her starting to stroke her fingers across the glass. It’s one of the ones that was taken on her birthday. Rye took it of the two of us right before he, Alyssa, and … yeah. Well, before the college show.
“It sure was,” I swallow, and clear my throat again while wondering if we’re ever gonna be as happy as we were that day again. “Hey, so I was thinking, if you haven’t gotten anything else planned for the rest of the day that is, um … do you wanna maybe do something together?”
“What like hang out?” She places the frame back down on the nightstand, and slowly heads back toward me.
Okay, just say it. Don’t be a pussy. You’re together now, well, as together as you possibly can be right now. Just ask her. Just tell her what you were hoping to do today. Take a deep breath, and another …
“No, actually I was hoping that I could maybe take you on that first date we never managed to have yet,” I say, and I’ve gotta admit here, I’m nervous as hell at what her answer’s gonna be. I know I can’t push her. She needs to be the one to call the shots. One wrong move on my part and it could jeopardize everything. “Unless you don’t wanna spend time with me. I mean, that’s cool, too. I guess …”
She’s watching me with a guarded expression, and I notice that her eyebrows are knitted tightly together, “We’ve been on dates.”
Well, at least she hasn’t said no … yet. I think about this for a moment, and cross my arms over my chest while cocking my head to the side, “Alright, when?” I keep my eyes on her face as she looks away. She seems to be deep in thought for a few moments before she finally brings her gaze back to meet mine.
“We’ve never been a date?” she asks, looking at me with surprise flitting into her eyes. “Are you sure?”
“Nope, we haven’t,” I say, and grab a hold of her hand before leading her back out from my bedroom. “But, that’s about to change.”
***
My face is aching from the wide smile I’ve been wearing ever since we pulled up outside this place. She hasn’t looked this contented for a long time, and knowing that I’m the one who made her look this way, well, you could say that I’m kinda pleased with myself.
“God this is good!” she moans the words out and closes her eyes. “You want some?” Her eyes widen when she looks down to the plate, immediately looking embarrassed when she realizes that the plate is almost empty already.
“No, I’m good,” I chuckle, and watch as she stabs some more of the food on her fork before opening her mouth up wide again. I’ve always known that Alexis has never been shy when it comes to her eating habits, but I don’t think that even Rye would be able to manage the amount of cheesecake Alexis has consumed in one sitting. “Here, you’ve got a little bit right on your …” I lift my hand up, and then run my thumb gently over her chin, letting it linger there for longer than what’s really necessary. I can’t help it. Any excuse to touch her then of course I’m gonna find a way.
“Would you like to try some of the White Chocolate Raspberry Truffle?” One of the servers asks us, offering over a smaller dish this time. Oh yeah. He’s apparently caught on to the fact that if he gives her any more than the serving he’s offering right there then he won’t be getting any back to offer to the other visitors. I watch as her eyes widen up even more this time, and try not to laugh out loud when she practically snatches the plate right from out of his hands. Note to self: never get in-between Alexis and cheesecake. Ever.
***
“I still can’t believe you took me to The Cheesecake Factory for our first official date,” she says, her eyes gleaming as she follows me to the porch. We spent a few hours in Pike Street while she overindulged in all the flavors, and it’s almost six o’clock as we make our way up the steps to the front door.
“But you loved it, right?” I ask, and try to keep the seven different cake boxes balanced under one arm while turning the key in the lock with the other.
“Best first date ever! Here, let me take them,” she offers. I see her trying to take them from me, but I shake my head.
“No, I’ve got them. I’m just hoping there’s enough room in the refrigerator for all of these,” I nudge the door open with my right knee, and head straight through to the kitchen so I can get them put them away. “Have you got room for any more?” I ask, and instantly start to laugh when I see her eyes widen and a huge smile starting to beam over her lips. Yeah, now that reaction doesn’t surprise me in the slightest.
Alexis tried every flavor and cleared every single dish. Me? Well, I settled for scraps, though I did manage to sneak in a small piece of the strawberry swirl one when she wasn’t looking. Don’t tell her, though, or I’ll most likely have to sleep in the backyard for the rest of my days.
She grabs the top box, and then heads over to open up one of the drawers to grab out a spoon, “You weren’t kidding?” I ask with surprise. How in the hell can she still be hungry? “Wow.” I shake my head, and watch as she scoops some more into her mouth. She closes her eyes and lets out a soft moan. Huh. It’s been a while since I’ve seen or heard her do that. Stop it.
I turn back around and open up the refrigerator. Yeah, plenty of room for these. As I close the door back up the landline sounds, but before I have a chance to grab the handset, I see that Alexis is already heading over to answer it, “He-w-elo?” Nice. I start laughing and she smiles, wiping the sides of her mouth with her fingers before her whole demeanor suddenly changes. Just a second ago her eyes were bright, and the smile over her face was one of the most beautiful things I think I’ve ever seen. But, now? She’s dropped her spoon on the floor, and is clutching her hands tightly on the counter, almost as though she’s trying to stay upright.
“Alexis, what is it?” I run straight over and immediately glance to her stomach. “Is it the baby?” Shit. Dammit. Shit. Fuck. “Alexis?” Placing my hands around her waist, she lets the phone slip from out of her left hand and I steer her toward a seat. “Please, Alexis? What it is? Who was that?”
“Ryan,” her voice is a faint whisper as she closes her eyes. Rye? Rye made her cry? I’m gonna fuckin—“They … they brought the hearing date forward.” Her voice is small, she starts shaking her head,
and when she reopens her eyes, I can see tears present and ready to fall.
“When?” I kneel down in front of her and take her hands in mine, “When, Alexis? When is it?”
“It was today,” she answers, her eyes grave. “F-F-i-ive … five years!” Her voice is strangled as she starts to sob uncontrollably, gripping my hands tighter with hers. Five years? Five fucking years? He should never be allowed out for what he did to us. Never. They should’ve thrown away the key, but five years? That’s nothing. That’s fucking nothing!
I rest back on my heels, and pull her into my arms until she’s sitting on my lap, her face nestling against my chest. I rock her back and forth in my arms, and she grips the back of my shirt, her body trembling against mine. After everything he did … to Holly … to her mom … to me, he still gets to have a life at the end of his term. But, they don’t. They don’t because he made fucking sure of that.
She moves her head back, and I can see the pain in her eyes. Yeah, I know, beautiful. I know. “I think that I maybe need to go and have a lie down for a little while. Do you mind?”
“No. Not at all. I’ll um … I’ll just watch some TV or something,” I answer, shrugging my shoulders while trying to smile. Once I’m standing, I lift her up by her waist until she’s back on her feet.
“Okay, well I’ll see you in a little while,” she smiles, starts to head toward the door, but then changes direction and walks back over to me instead. “Brandon?” Her eyes search mine for a second before she leans in.
“Yeah?” I gulp, and my heart starts thrashing hard inside my chest. We haven’t been this close for a fucking long time. Please. Yeah. Do it. Kiss me. Please just fucking kiss me, beautiful.
“Thanks for today,” I smile when she stands on her tiptoes, bringing her hands up to rest on my shoulders. “Up until the phone call, I had a really great time with you.” She lifts one of her hands up to my face, and leans in some more until she’s pressing her lips … on my cheek.
Misguided Truths: Part Two (Misjudged) Page 36