Damaged

by Nina D'Angelo

  “He’s Ben’s best friend,” Stephanie whispered, closing her eyes. Letting her tears fall freely, she whispered softly, “I swore to God I would never fall in love. I was determined to go through life without letting anyone get that close. Then I met Dominic and he blew all my plans into smithereens. He made me fall in love with him, and then he ripped my heart out. I can’t stay here, Cass. I can’t stay here and pretend I’m okay when I’m not.”

  Cassandra linked her arm through Stephanie’s, resting her head on her friend’s shoulder. “Are you sure? You love LA. God knows, I’ve never worked out why this goddamn city means so much to you, but it does.” Indicating with her hand, she said sarcastically, “Are you sure you want to leave all this?”

  “I don’t have a choice anymore,” Stephanie whispered bitterly. “Ben is Dominic’s best friend. If I stay with him, I’ll see Dominic, and I’m not sure I—” Breaking off with a hiccup, she whispered, “I’m not sure I can stand by and watch as he parades women in front of me, especially knowing I was just another notch on his bedpost.”

  “You could just break up with Ben, you know,” Cassandra said, nudging Stephanie lightly. “You don’t have to let yourself get run out of town. This is your home. Hell, if anyone should be run out of town, it should be Dominic. Just give me the word and I’ll make it happen.”

  Stephanie twisted to look at Cassandra, her expression hardening. “Promise me you won’t do anything to Dominic.”

  When Cassandra remained silent, she grabbed her wrist and twisted tightly. “Promise me,” she repeated between clenched teeth. “He may not love me, but I love him more than life itself, and I won’t stand by and let him get hurt. That’s why I’m leaving. If I stay, sooner or later Ben will realize how I feel about Dominic, and it will destroy him. It will destroy his friendship with Dominic, and I won’t do that to either of them. I won’t be the woman who gets between them.”

  “Dominic doesn’t deserve you, Stephanie. In fact, neither does Ben. You’re worth a million of both of them. I hope one day Dominic realizes what he lost, and I hope it kills him,” Cassandra said, her eyes flashing angrily. “For your sake, I won’t hurt the son of a bitch, even if he does deserve to be strung up and quartered. Or, at the very least, castrated.”

  Stephanie bit out a choked out laugh, wiping her eyes. “I think I’ll miss you the most, Cass.”

  “Oh, honey, you won’t ever get rid of me that easily,” Cassandra drawled, linking her arm with Stephanie’s again. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

  Stephanie took a deep breath, nodding. “I have to.” Turning towards Outlaws, she added with a whisper, “It won’t be forever. One day, I’ll come back, but for now I need to get away. Here, I’m forever reminded of Dominic, and I need to get over him. In order to do that, I need to forget I ever met him.”

  DOMINIC PUSHED THROUGH the throes of Outlaws party-goers. Anyone who was anyone in LA was here tonight. Tonight, Outlaws was the place to be, and they all knew it.

  Stepping out onto the outside balcony, he took in a deep breath of air. Glancing around, he smiled sardonically. His bar was at full capacity tonight. He should be ecstatic that Ben’s party was an enormous success. Jax had informed him the line to get into Outlaws was three blocks long. The news should have left him feeling elated. Instead, he felt empty.

  Turning his head, he drew in a breath at the sight of Stephanie standing mere meters from him. He drank in the sight of her, grateful she was oblivious to the fact she was being watched. Leaning against the balcony, she stared out into the night, her expression devoid of emotion.

  With a thundering heart, he took a step towards her, freezing when a woman joined her on the balcony. Recognizing Dominique Arlington, he frowned. Dominique Arlington was a mystery to everyone. Almost a recluse, she rarely ventured out in public unless she had to, and she never did interviews. She was one hell of a businesswoman, and on more than one occasion they’d crossed paths.

  Dominique Arlington was as beautiful as Stephanie, except she left him completely cold. He smiled ruefully at this. From afar, both Stephanie and Dominique could easily be mistaken for sisters, but that’s where the similarities ended. Stephanie didn’t like showing people how she felt, but her eyes revealed a wealth of emotions to anyone who looked closely enough, whereas Dominique’s eyes revealed nothing.

  His lips thinned in displeasure when Dominique grabbed Stephanie’s wrist tightly, and he unconsciously took another step towards them, his hands curling into fists. Watching Dominique gently wipe Stephanie’s palms, he sucked in a breath, feeling as if he’d been kicked in the stomach.

  From afar, even he could see the gouges on Stephanie’s hands, and he closed his eyes, swallowing convulsively. He’d done that to her. Turning away, he dropped his gaze to the ground. She’d told him she used pain as a method of self-control. She’d needed to hurt herself to control her emotions; she’d loved him that deeply. The realization almost made his knees buckle, and he grabbed the railing to support himself.

  Bracing himself against the railing, he cursed his own stupidity. He’d thrown her away as if she meant nothing to him. He’d done it to protect Ben, and damned both Stephanie and himself in the process. He’d not thought of the consequences for either of them. He’d ended it swiftly, believing it wouldn’t hurt as much. He’d been wrong. It had hurt a hell of a lot more.

  Lifting his gaze from the ground, he was startled to find Ben walking towards him, his face a thundercloud. Seeing the fury on Ben’s face, Dominic smiled grimly. There was only one damn reason Ben could be that furious with him, and she was standing mere meters away.

  Bracing himself for the onslaught of abuse, that was coming, Dominic was surprised to find he was relieved. He’d hated lying to Ben, and he’d hated pretending he didn’t give a damn about Stephanie.

  “You son of a bitch,” Ben growled, reaching Dominic. Shoving him, he said fiercely, “You could have had any woman in LA. You could have fucked countless numbers of women, but it had to be her. Damn it, Dom, why her? Why the hell did you have to fuck my girlfriend?”

  “Ben, I didn’t know,” Dominic growled, his own eyes darkening with fury. “You think I would have honestly slept with her if I’d known? You think I’d have approached her if I’d known she were your girlfriend?” Not waiting for Ben to reply, he thrust his hands into his pockets. “I didn’t know.”

  “You think that makes a difference, Dom?” Ben said, shoving Dom with both hands this time. “Take your hands out of your pockets and fight me, damn it.”

  “Ben, I’m not fighting you,” Dominic said quietly, struggling to remain calm. Ignoring the growing crowd, he went to move past Ben.

  Ben grabbed Dominic’s arm, spinning him around. Drawing his fist back, he slammed it into Dominic’s mouth, grunting with satisfaction when Dominic’s head jerked back. “Fight me, you son of a bitch.”

  Dominic touched his mouth, not surprised to find blood on his fingers when he moved his hand away from his lips. Turning his head, he spat out blood, wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his shirt. Repeating himself, he said huskily, “I’m not fighting you.”

  “Why the hell not? You can nail my girlfriend, but you can’t fight me, is that it?” Ben growled, advancing on Dominic again. Ben growled in frustration when Dominic refused to fight him. “Tell me, Dominic, was it worth it? Was more than twenty years of friendship worth throwing away?” Slamming his fist into Dominic’s jaw, he jeered, “Was she that good?”

  Dominic spat out blood again, his hands on his thighs as he hunched over. With a sneer, he said, “She was better than good. Tell me, Benny, what are you really angry about? Is it the fact I fucked your girlfriend, or the fact she fell in love with me?”

  Ben’s arm dropped to his side at Dominic’s question. “We’re done.”

  Dominic spat out blood again, shaking his head in disgust. “I didn’t know who she was when I met her, Ben. As soon as I knew, I walked away, but that’s still not enough for you, is it? W
hat the hell do you want from me?”

  “The truth would have been nice!” Ben yelled, his fists clenching in anger again. “You stood there, Dom. You let me introduce her to you, and you didn’t say one goddamn word to me. Not one. Neither of you did. You pretended as if you didn’t even know each other.” He shook his head in disgust. “You know what? You and Stephanie both deserve each other. I don’t know which of you is the bigger whore.”

  Dominic’s head snapped up at Ben’s comment, and he took a threatening step towards Ben. “Don’t call her that,” he growled, his eyes flashing with anger. “Don’t ever call her that.”

  “Oh, come on, Dom. Don’t pretend like you give a damn about her,” Ben sneered, contemptuously raking his eyes over Dominic. “You fucked her and moved on. Maybe I should do the same. Fuck her one last time and move—”

  Dominic didn’t let Ben finish his sentence, his fist connecting with his jaw. Not waiting for Ben to recover, he launched himself at him, tackling him to the ground. Slamming his fist into Ben’s face, he growled, “You can say what the hell you want about me, Reynolds, but don’t you ever call Stephanie a whore.”

  Tyler cursed as he watched Dominic tackle Ben to the ground. Pushing through the excited crowd, he grabbed Dominic by the back of his shirt, dragging him off Ben. Wrapping his arms around Dominic’s chest, he held onto him tightly, determined not to let go until Dominic had calmed down.

  “Let me go, damn it,” Dominic growled, his gaze fixed on Ben.

  Jax pushed his way through the crowd to where Dominic and Ben stood, facing each other. Holding his hand out, he smiled when Ben accepted it and allowed Jax to help him off the ground.

  “Why do you even care, Dom?” Ben said flatly, his gaze on Dominic’s furious face. “You got what you wanted from her and moved on. Why does it matter that I think she’s a whore?”

  Struggling to break free from Tyler’s embrace, he growled, “Fuck you, Ben. I care because I love her.”

  “You love her?” Ben said dully.

  “Yes, I love her,” Dominic bit out.

  Seeing the anger die on both Ben and Dominic’s faces, Tyler released his hold on Dominic.

  Dominic picked up one of the chairs that had toppled over and sat down, leaning forward. Not looking at Ben, he said harshly, “I love her more than life itself, and I broke her heart . . . no, I ripped it out. As soon as I knew she was your girlfriend, I ended it.”

  Ben staggered toward Dominic, picked up another upturned chair and sat in it. “You broke up with her?” he echoed.

  “Christ, Ben, you’re my best friend. What the hell did you think I was going to do?” Dominic asked bitterly, wiping his mouth with the back of his shirt sleeve. He winced at the throbbing that shot through his bottom lip.

  “But you love her,” Ben said, seeing the devastation on Dominic’s face.

  “Yeah, but I love you more,” Dominic growled, looking ahead to where the crowd that had gathered to watch them fight started to slowly dissipate. “You’re my best friend. I didn’t want that to change.”

  Ben cocked his head to one side. “You’ve never been in love with anyone before.”

  “Yeah, I know.” He turned to where Stephanie stood, oblivious to them, her head bent close to Dominique’s. Turning back to look at Ben, he said raggedly, “I’m sorry, Ben. I never wanted to hurt you. I just figured if I ended it, then you didn’t need to know what happened. I never intended to tell you about us. I sure as hell never wanted you to find out tonight, especially not like this.”

  “So, you broke her heart and yours instead?” Ben said, watching Dominic flinch. His anger disappeared at the pain evident in Dominic’s eyes. “Damn, Dom, you’re a better man than I am. I would have grabbed onto her and never let go.”

  “You still can,” Dominic said, his expression pained. “I won’t stand in the way of your relationship with her.” He put his hand up when Ben began to protest. “Ben, you’re head over heels in love with her. I’ve seen it in your eyes and on your face. There’s no way in hell I’m standing in the way of your happiness.”

  “There’s just one problem with that. She doesn’t love me,” Ben said, clasping his hands together. “Not like she does you.”

  “Ben—”

  “No, Dom, listen to me now. I love her. I won’t deny that. I’m pretty sure, deep down, a part of her loves me too, but she let you in. In the whole time we’ve been together, she’s never let me see any part of who she is. When she told me tonight she’d met someone, but it was over, I knew it wasn’t. I knew she’d let you in, and I hated you for it. She was hurting. You’d broken her heart.”

  Dominic flinched in response.

  “You broke her in two, and it cut her straight to the bone. I couldn’t break her heart even if I wanted to. To do that, she’d have to give it to me, and she will never love me. Not the way she does you.”

  “It doesn’t matter, Ben. I destroyed her when I broke up with her. Christ, you should have seen her face when I told her I could never love someone like her. I shattered her heart in two with those empty words. Anything she felt for me was destroyed in that moment, and I will never forgive myself for that.”

  “I can’t believe you’re giving up on her,” Ben said, surprise in his voice. “That’s not like you.”

  Dominic stared at him, disbelief on his face. “Are you suggesting I go after her? She’s your girlfriend, Ben. Hell, you should want to kill me.”

  “I did want to kill you, for about a nanosecond, then it hit me. You love her. I saw it in your face when I called her a whore. You’ve never admitted to loving someone before. I’ve known you for more than twenty years, and not once have I seen you in love.” Ben touched his own lip and winced. “But tonight was different. You were different. I couldn’t work it out. I couldn’t figure out why you were drinking yourself into oblivion and acting as if you were trying to win asshole of the year. All I knew was that you were hurting over something, but now I know.”

  He shook his head. “I can’t hate you for loving her, because I love her too. She’s special. If I thought I stood a chance in hell of her loving me the way she loves you, you can bet your ass I’d fight you for her, but she doesn’t, and I don’t think she ever did. She likes me, sure. In some ways, she loves me, but you’re everything to her. When we arrived here tonight, I saw it in her eyes.”

  “Ben, it doesn’t matter.”

  “You still love her, don’t you?”

  Dominic scowled. “Of course, I do. I just told you I love her.”

  “And you’re never going to feel this way about anyone again?” Ben pointed out, watching Dominic shake his head. “Then fight for her. Do what you do best. Seduce her, woo her. Hell, if you have to get down on your goddamn knees and beg her to take you back then do it. If she’s worth it, you’ll fight with every fiber of your being to get her back in your arms. You’ll continue fighting with your last breath.”

  Dominic looked at Ben, dumbstruck for a brief moment before he nodded his head. Smiling slowly, he stood up. Holding his hand out to Ben, he helped him to his feet, slapping him on the back.

  “You said I’m a better man than you, but you’re wrong. You’re the better one,” he said softly, shaking his head with a chuckle.

  “Yeah, well I’m also better looking. For the life of me, I can’t figure out why she prefers you, but she does. Now, go get her,” Ben said, watching Dominic nod his head again.

  Dominic nodded briefly to him before he walked away. Ben grinned at the sheer determination on Dominic’s face as he pushed himself through the crowded balcony.

  Jax appeared by his side, handing him a beer. He took it gratefully, turning to smile at Tyler when he appeared on his other side.

  “You could have told him to go to hell,” Tyler said.

  Ben nodded, lifting the beer bottle to his mouth and taking a long sip. “I could have, but what would have been the point? I’d have spent the whole time wondering if she were thinking of him, and she’d ha
ve spent the whole time pretending I was him.”

  Looking at Tyler, he said quietly, “That’s not a relationship. It’s a life sentence of making each other miserable. I won’t do that to her. I won’t do that to myself. I’d rather see Dominic and Stephanie happy than watch them both be miserable.”

  “He loves her,” Jax supplied, giving Ben a lazy smile. “And, she loves him.”

  “Yeah, she does,” Ben said quietly.

  “Are you going to be okay?”

  Ben looked at Tyler, his smile fading. “I will be, eventually.”

  “What are the chances she’s going to forgive him easily?” Tyler mused.

  A small smile crept onto Ben’s lips. Amusement lacing his voice, he said, “There’s not a snowball’s chance in hell that’s going to happen. Dominic’s got his work cut out for him if he wants to win her back. Stephanie’s not the forgiving type.”

  “He’s screwed isn’t he?” Jax said, laughter dancing in his eyes.

  “Yeah, he is,” Ben said, turning to look at Jax and then Tyler. “But to have someone love you the way Stephanie loves Dominic, isn’t it worth it?”

  STEPHANIE ZIPPED UP her suitcase, glancing around her room with a sad smile. She loved this apartment. Even though it was way too small for four females, and the bedroom walls were paper thin, for the past six months it had been home—the closest place she’d had to a home for as long as she could recall.

  Her friends were her family. She was going to miss them the most. Everything else was replaceable. She could go to university anywhere in the world, and she could live anywhere. She had both the money and the means. It was her friends who kept her grounded.

  Gena, who constantly worried about her destructive behavior. Carolyn, who was an outrageous flirt, but deep down had her own demons. Angel, who had always accepted her for who she was, and didn’t care what anyone else thought. These girls were her family. From the moment she’d met them, they’d bonded.