Beautifully Damaged

by Gina Sevani

"Shit." Damon groaned. He cleared his throat twice and moved in his seat like he was the one that wasn't so comfortable now.

  GOOD!

  Damon reached for my hand and placed it on his thigh. We didn't speak until he pulled into the yogurt place. He parked the car and cut the ignition. He didn't make a move to get out of the car.

  "You know this isn't ice cream, right?"

  "Yup. It's better."

  He was right. I'd only been there once but it was delicious.

  "What are we waiting on?"

  "Well I could lie but that's insanely hard around you. I don't think it's appropriate to walk inside. Like this." He looked down toward his lap.

  I smiled at his choice of words and repeated them.

  "It's insanely hard, really?"

  Damon laid his head against the headrest and laughed beautifully. "Holy shit I'm creating a monster."

  "Come on Romeo, I'm going in."

  "Yeah, yeah, I'm coming."

  Damon realized very soon the words that left his mouth and before I could say a thing he reached over and covered my mouth with his hand.

  "Let it go, Ariel. You have a dirty, dirty mind. I think you've been hanging out with Sean way too much." He laughed.

  "Man, I can't wait to tell him," I sing.

  He cut his eyes toward me. "You wouldn't."

  "I so would."

  "Yeah, you do that, and I'll tell him what caused my mind to be an utter mess, like for example you squirming in your seat from being so turned on by me." He arched his eyebrows as if questioning my next move.

  "You don't play fair," I said, suppressing the sudden urge to squirm.

  "Or perhaps I could tell him about you pulling the guy move and mumbling words like puppies and unicorns." He busted out laughing.

  No I did not say that out loud. I was completely mortified.

  He could tell what I was thinking.

  "Urgh!"

  I stomped off toward the entrance leaving him behind. I sulked like a four year old who didn't get the toy she wanted. I acknowledged it, and I just didn't care. I sat down at a table away from everyone else after he pitched a fit to pay.

  "You're cute when you pout," he said.

  "I'm not pouting." I so was.

  Damon chuckled which was way too freaking adorable. It caused me to smile when I really wanted to pout. I kinda hated him for it — not really.

  "Just so you know." He licked his spoon. Did he even realize that he was making my hormones go flippin' crazy? "This is not our date."

  "Good," I said

  "Good?" He questioned me with his eyes.

  "Yeah that means I don't have to answer all those silly get-to-know-me questions."

  His hands fell down to his lap and he sighed in frustration.

  "I don't know which way is up or down with you. If you were any other girl I wouldn't be able to get you to shut up about yourself. Here we are and I can't get you to tell me anything personal."

  "You already know more than anyone else." I looked down toward my yogurt topped with strawberries. I liked that he tasted strawberries when he kissed me.

  "Yeah, Ariel, that's the part that scares me. You don't let anyone in. So if I'm completely honest with myself, my chances of you letting me in are pretty damn slim."

  Wow.

  Damon was so honest all of the time, and I'd often wished I could be more like him, but my honesty would allow me to do nothing except lose whatever it was we had.

  "It's complicated," I said.

  His eyes searched mine; for what I wasn't certain.

  "You're complicated."

  "That's true, and I warned you not to waste any time on me."

  "I guess it's a good thing I like complicated, and any time I spend with you is surely not wasted Ariel." We ate some of our yogurt in silence. I caught his gaze a few times.

  "Have you always lived in South Carolina, here in Lake Marion?"

  "Not always, St. Matthews and Georgia before I moved in with Grams."

  "You're twenty one? When's your birthday?"

  "I thought this wasn't the date?"

  "It isn't, but those are easy questions." He smiled.

  "Fine, yes, and my birthday is April eighteenth, what about you?"

  "June twenty-first, I'm twenty five."

  His eyes searched mine once more and all I could offer was a smile.

  At least it was real and genuine. Damon devoured his large cup of yogurt. I couldn't help but watch his every move. Some guys would probably freak or think it was way too weird, but he'd captivated me. If there were a thousand other guys around, my eyes would still remain on him. Damon had caused an uproar in my life, and for once I was curious and in a constant state of wonder. What would it be like to allow myself to truly be in love with someone, to completely give every ounce of myself to someone, and to be loved in return?

  To love and to be loved, cherished, wanted, craved, all of it sounded pretty sweet. I was in deep thought. I didn't notice he had left the table and thrown our cups away until he reached for my hand.

  "Ready to go?"

  I knew from the concerned look on his face that he noticed I went to another place momentarily but thankfully he didn't mention it.

  "Yeah sure." I slid my hand into his and my last thought before he opened the door for me was how perfect it felt holding onto something.

  We started to pull out of the parking lot when Rihanna's "Say My Name" began to play on the radio. Talk about coincidence. Damon laughed.

  "What's the chance of this playing after your little game earlier?"

  We were at one of the few stoplights in this town and I turned my body and faced him completely. It was me searching his eyes.

  "Pretty damn slim."

  He inhaled sharply. "Ariel."

  "Damon." I whispered right before our mouths collided in another epic kiss that I would cherish forever. His mouth fused with mine as he forced my lips apart, there was no denying him. No denying the chemistry we shared. It was right there slapping me in the face constantly, and I'd be damned if I wouldn't turn the other cheek just to experience it again.

  His tongue explored my mouth, and I threw my arms around him needing more, always needing more. Damon's long fingers rested on my hip and inched their way under the bottom of my shirt. His grip was tight but perfectly so. The feel of his hands on my bare skin sent shivers all over my body. I don't know how long we stayed in that position before the honking started, but when we broke and I looked up, the light was green. By the time Damon finally drew away from me, the light had changed back to red without a single car going across the intersection. Yeah, I'd say there were some pissed off people behind us. Damon grumbled as he adjusted himself back into his seat.

  "Killing me," he mumbled under his breath.

  A chill ran through me upon hearing his words, and my thoughts turned dark. The thing with happiness was it could always be easily destroyed. Before my thoughts could take a turn into too much negativity central, I started to sing the song. That brought me back.

  Damon's smile was contagious as he started singing Drake's part in the background, which was at the beginning of the song and he'd missed it. I had to admit we sounded really good together. I was already hot and bothered. Singing that particular song to each other probably wasn't the best idea, but that didn't stop either one of us. Damon reached for my hand, and I let him take it. As small of a gesture it was holding his hand, it caused me to get emotional. I stared at our joined hands and wondered how it was possible to feel so much from just holding hands.

  He caressed my hand with his thumb. A slight urge to pull away from him began, because it was too much — almost. Almost too much to handle but as I closed my eyes and tried to find the strength I needed, he raised our hands and laid a kiss upon mine. All of a sudden I got the courage and strength I sought to hold on a little longer.

  "Two options and as much as I would like you to choose the latter I doubt you will. First option I take you back to your
truck. Second, you come with me to meet my mom and sister?"

  "No way, I need to shower and change my clothes when I meet your family. Are you crazy?"

  "So you will meet them? You just need to shower first?" He was grinning.

  "I didn't say that."

  "Think back, babe…"

  I didn't have to think back. I gave him a serious side-eye. "You're incorrigible!"

  "Your truck it is then."

  "Your sister, is she older or younger?"

  "Younger."

  Damon pulled into the parking spot right beside my truck.

  "Wait."

  I laid my hand on his forearm to stop him from getting out of the car to open my door.

  What the hell are you doing Ariel?

  "Ummm, what are you and your family doing today?"

  A smile lit up his entire face, but he recovered quickly to mask his excitement.

  "I promised my sister I would meet them at the park, and as much as I don't want our time to end, I really don't want to piss her off."

  Okay that didn't sound too bad.

  "Just the park, right?"

  "Just the park, Ariel," he said softly.

  "Okay."

  His voice and eyes both questioned me. "Are you sure?"

  "Yeah, I want to go but they might not like me." I bit my lip which was a nervous habit I was fully aware of.

  "Impossible."

  "Why's that?"

  "They mean the world to me… I love— I like you so, umm, yeah, they will too."

  Damon immediately threw the car in reverse a little too roughly and stared straight on. It had to be just a slip of the tongue. He didn't mean it. I crossed my arms, turned my gaze out my window, and watched the trees as they flashed by. The sky was so bright and blue. The entire drive was only about ten minutes or so and we rode in complete silence. It had me questioning my decision to come. Maybe the invite was him just being friendly.

  "Stop over thinking it," he said.

  Damon cut the ignition off and played with his keys.

  "I can sit in the car if you like. I mean if you don't want me to meet them, I completely understand if you've changed your mind."

  "Oh, Ariel, it's not that… at all." He threw his head back on the headrest and a frustrated tiny growl came from his mouth. "Shit!"

  Without lifting it from the headrest, Damon rolled his head until he was looking at me.

  "I can't explain to you the things I want. I'm afraid to bring the conversation back up that we started on the pier. I can't have you running away when I feel like I just got a part of you, no matter how small that part may be."

  I could get lost in his perfect blue eyes.

  He gently took my hand. "I want you here beside me. I want you to meet my family. Can we just deal with that for right now and when I have no doubt in my mind that you won't run for the hills then and only then I will fully explain in depth the many other things I want?"

  I swallowed hard and reminded myself how to breathe. That noise I just heard, yeah it was one more wall that crashed down that was supposed to be protecting my already shattered heart.

  "All right, Damon." I licked my dry lips and reached for the door handle. Before we could even close the gate to the entrance of the park the toddlers usually played at, a precious little girl who looked a lot like him was running toward us. Damon scooped her up into his big arms and she had hers wrapped around him tight. I could easily see their love for one another. Their smiles lit up their entire faces. It was adorable. Yet as precious as the scene was, I had a sickening feeling in my gut that she was his daughter. She looked just like him, even had a few of the same mannerisms. But surely he would have told me if we were meeting his daughter. I immediately thought of his ways with women and his past. She could be his and although I would never shy away from a great guy because he was a father, thoughts of him experiencing something so precious and fragile with someone else… well, it hurt.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  "IT'S VERY EASY FOR ME TO read you right now." Damon smiled. "This is Sadie, my niece."

  "She's adorable." The pressure in my chest released.

  "Where's your mom, princess?"

  The little angel shrugged her tiny shoulders and at the same time some young, dark haired girl came running toward us screaming.

  Damon flipped his niece to his back.

  "Uh huh look what you did. She's turned into a MOMSTER again."

  The little girl buried her face into his shoulders and giggled uncontrollably.

  "SADIE ELIZABETH! How many times have I told you not to run away from me?"

  "I'm sorry, Mummy." She turned her face to hide behind Damon.

  Hook, line, sinker. I'd be a terrible disciplinarian.

  "Ah, come on, Mummy, she didn't mean it," he pouted.

  "Not helping, Damon." His sister glared up at him.

  Sadie reached for her mom and laid a big, fat, sloppy kiss on her cheek. Something told me this little girl was a handful.

  "Uncle Damon, play." She jumped up and down while she pointed toward the swing sets.

  "Shay, this is Ariel, Ariel my annoying little sister Shay."

  Shay looked about sixteen, tiny and beautiful. She actually sized me up twice before she spoke. I immediately thought about that old quote by Shakespeare—"And though she be but little, she is fierce."

  Shay was a force to be reckoned with, that I could already tell.

  "The Ariel." She smiled broadly. "I've heard a lot about you."

  "Don't start." Damon growled.

  "Oh, Mom can't come. She has a migraine."

  "Okay, I'll call her later."

  "Uncle Damon." Sadie waved wildly toward the swings. Damon picked her up and threw her in the air while he walked toward the playground.

  "All right, Princess Sadie, let's go."

  Seeing him with her was a beautiful sight.

  "She loves his aggravating ass so much."

  I laughed at her words. "Yeah, you can tell."

  "She'll have all his time for a while, want to go sit?"

  "Sure."

  Shay had drinks and snacks inside a small cooler. After she asked me twice if I wanted anything, and I declined, she insisted on water. She was bossy like her brother.

  "Thanks."

  "So, my brother has never brought a girl to meet me, much less Sadie. He's extremely protective."

  I wasn't sure why she felt the need to tell me that, but I still liked the fact that he hadn't. He was twenty-five. It was still hard for me to believe. I just smiled without a response. I didn't want her to leave thinking I was a total ass so I needed to find a subject I felt comfortable talking about.

  "How old is your daughter?"

  "Almost three."

  "Wow, she talks really well."

  She laughed. "Yeah, Damon says she learns a lot from me because I'm always flapping my jaws."

  "Sounds like him."

  We were both quiet for a few minutes as we watched them play together. Damon was at that little girl's beck and call. Whatever she asked, he did. It was so stinking sweet. I could feel Shay watching me and it appeared like she was contemplating her words before she said them.

  "He's right. You are different."

  I shrugged but chose not look at her.

  "I think it's a good thing," she said. "My brother… you like him don't you?"

  Oh my gosh, she did talk a lot, and I could tell she wasn't one to give up easily. She would ask again, maybe a different way until she got what she wanted from me. I still liked her for some reason. I screwed the cap off my water, took a sip, and thought quickly on the best way to respond.

  "He's pretty amazing."

  "Yeah, he really is. I don't know what I would do without him." Shay nodded and turned her attention back to them. I guess she got the answer she wanted because she didn't pry any longer.

  Damon carried a sleeping Sadie in his arms; she'd fallen fast asleep on their third round on the swings. I'd thought she wa
s nodding off earlier, but she'd pepped right back up.

  "She's out, sis," he whispered.

  "Think you can buckle her in without waking her?"

  "You really want to keep losing money to me?" he asked.

  "You won't win this time."

  Damon pivoted and walked away with Sadie in his arms.

  She looked toward me. "I can't ever do this without her waking up but he pulls some Jedi powers out of his ass and she never wakes up for him."

  She was funny.

  "Really?"

  "Every single time." She smiled a little wistfully. "He acts so big with wanting to win but he always sneaks the money back to me somehow." She looked at her brother in awe. It was easy to see they were extremely close. The whole time I'd been sitting there with her, it had taken every ounce of my energy to not have thoughts of my sister because they would take me to a dark place. We caught up with them, and she unlocked her car door.

  "All right princess, be a good girl," Damon whispered.

  Sadie smiled in her sleep. Shay had her hands locked together in prayer. She didn't care about losing the bet. I think she wanted five minutes of Mommy Time.

  Damon gently placed Sadie in her car seat and carefully fastened the seatbelt.

  "How the hell do you do that? I mean I'm glad, but I don't like that you can do something I can't." Her arms were crossed as she pouted.

  He wore a devious smile. "Don't cuss in front of her, and stop being a hater."

  Shay threw five bucks over the hood of the car. When Damon leaned down to check the seat once more, I saw him slide the money into the side of Sadie's diaper bag.

  Sneaky sneaky. I might have just fallen a little harder.

  Damon gave Sadie a brief kiss on the forehead.

  "You ready, Ariel?"

  "Ariel," Sadie whispered, we all looked toward her, and she was still sleeping peacefully.

  "Ariel… pretty like mermaid." She giggled in her sleep.

  Be still my heart.

  My heart just skipped a beat, and I wanted to pick her up so I could love on her like crazy.

  "Ah, thank God," Shay whispered. "It was nice meeting you, Ariel."

  "You too." I smiled.

  "See ya later, bro."

  Damon watched with a smile upon his face as they drove off. He wrapped his fingers around my wrists and pulled me in close.