[Vankara Saga 03.0] War of Atonement

by SJ West

  Inara pushed Gabriel out of her way, threw open the door, and rushed out of the room. As I watched her walk hurriedly down the hallway, I saw her lift both of her hands to her face and wipe away what I had to assume were tears off her cheeks.

  “Maybe I made a mistake,” I said to Gabriel as I continued to watch Inara until she turned a corner and was no longer in my line of sight. “Maybe I should have gone on letting her believe I was Queen Emma.”

  Gabriel exhaled heavily. “No, you did the right thing. She just needs some time to adjust. We’ll be traveling to the Fae side soon. I suggest we leave Inara here to mourn Emma’s loss. I don’t believe she can properly grieve if she has to be around you. Perhaps when we return, she’ll be in a better frame of mind to listen to reason. Inara’s one of the smartest people I know. She’ll come to realize that Emma made the correct decision about us not telling her what was actually happening. For what it’s worth, I think you made the correct decision about telling Inara the truth. If she had somehow figured it out on her own, she would have never forgiven you. Now, at least you have a chance to make her a true friend.”

  “I hope you’re right,” I said, even if I had my doubts. “I have so few people who I consider to be my friends. I don’t want to lose her as one of them.”

  “Then give her the time and distance that she needs right now,” Gabriel advised. “She’ll come around. Once her mind is clearer, I think she’ll understand why Emma wanted us to keep her in the dark about what was truly going on.”

  “Gabriel is right,” Aurora said to me. “Inara will come to realize you meant no malice towards her. I believe she cares enough about you to forgive you for withholding the truth from her.”

  “But how long will it take before she’s ready to forgive me?” I asked.

  “Unfortunately, I cannot see into the future, Sarah. We will all have to wait and see how long it will take. Just remember that the burden of guilt doesn’t solely rest on your shoulders. She will have to find a way to forgive Gabriel and Fallon for their deception as well.”

  “Does Inara have any other friends?” I asked Gabriel. “Anyone else besides Queen Emma that she can go to for counsel?”

  “Not really,” Gabriel said with a slight shake of his head. “The only other person she might confide to would be her father.”

  “If she does that,” I said, “everything Queen Emma wanted could be lost. Thaddeus has been looking for a way to undermine the queen’s authority for a long time now. If Inara tells him the truth of what I am, he will surely try to dethrone me. He might even try to have me beheaded.”

  “I won’t let that happen,” Gabriel said fiercely. “He would have to go through me first before he touched a hair on your head.”

  Gabriel’s protective spirit where I was concerned was like a physical presence in the room. I knew he would give his life if that was the only way to safeguard mine. I felt sure it wasn’t just because I was carrying the child he and Queen Emma made together either. Though, I supposed there was still a possibility that it was Aleksander Chromis’ child that I carried.

  “It is not even a remote possibility,” Aurora informed me succinctly. “I am certain Chromis is not the father, Sarah. Gabriel is. Why is it so hard for you to take my word on this matter?”

  “If Gabriel truly is the father,” I told her, “then we will forever be linked to one another. If I’m being honest, I’m not sure I want that.”

  “Gabriel is a better choice than Chromis. That is a fact you can’t deny.”

  “I know you’re right, but it doesn’t make things any easier.”

  “I was coming to find you before your talk with Inara,” Gabriel informed me. “Dracen has made your talismans, and we’re ready to send instructions to the fleets on where they can find safe harbors to anchor their ships.”

  “Good,” I said. “I can go to the dragons at Ledmarrow and give them their instructions. Can you take me to Dracen?”

  “Of course.”

  Gabriel led the way out of the room. I stayed behind him as we strode down the hallway together. I didn’t believe either of us was in the mood to come up with polite chitchat as we walked, and I took the time to send up a silent prayer that Inara would eventually be able to forgive me for my subterfuge. The possibility that she could tell her father the truth about me was a real one, but I knew there wasn’t anything I could do to prevent that from happening. I had just confided all of my deepest, darkest secrets to her in hopes that she would be able to come to terms with the truth. I simply prayed I had made the right decision.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  Gabriel escorted me back up to the war room where most everyone was still gathered. The one person most noticeably absent was Inara. Not that I expected her to be in the room, but if I hadn’t just turned her world upside down, I felt sure she would be here with me, lending her support.

  I noticed Dracen and Fallon had separated themselves from everyone else in the room and were speaking to one another in hushed tones. While Gabriel walked over to speak with Thaddeus Irondale and the others, I went directly to Dracen and Fallon. As I approached, Dracen was the one who noticed me first. He welcomed me with a smile that was both warm and proud. I could see the light of a father’s love in his eyes as he looked at me, but I didn’t feel wholly deserving of such an emotion from him. I had caused him over twenty years of heartache. How could he still love his daughter after living with the pain of loss for so long?

  When I didn’t return Dracen’s smile, his own faltered and he asked, “What’s wrong? Has something happened?”

  In a low voice for only Dracen’s and Fallon’s ears, I said, “I told Inara everything.”

  “And how is she handling knowing the truth?” Fallon asked, looking concerned over the prospect of Inara’s reaction to my revelations.

  “She walked out of the room crying,” I informed them, feeling not only a great sense of guilt, but also sorrow for someone I considered to be a friend. I couldn’t help Inara deal with her confusion and pain unless she came to me. I highly doubted that would happen anytime soon. For the sake of my own sanity, I decided to push Inara out of my mind for now and tackle the next task I needed to handle. I looked to Dracen and said, “Gabriel told me you were successful in making the talismans we need to travel back and forth to Ledmarrow.”

  Dracen reached into an inner pocket of his jacket and pulled out what appeared to be a necklace. He held it out in the palm of his right hand to show it to me.

  It was a gold locket approximately two inches in diameter. In the center of the locket, was a thin yellow disk of trillian. The gold surrounding the gem had been molded into the shape of a dragon. It appeared so lifelike it was almost as if it was protecting the trillian by cradling it within the circle of its body.

  “Oh my,” Aurora said, sounding in awe of the necklace. “It’s so shiny.”

  The dreamlike quality to her voice reminded me that all dragons are attracted to precious metals and gemstones. In fact, I had promised the dragons that they could take the section of the Iron Wall that the Fae had transformed into gold back home with them after the war was over. It was a small token considering their willingness to help us in our time of need.

  Dracen brought up his other hand and opened the locket to show me what was inside. My face instantly scrunched up into a mask of confusion.

  “Why is there hair inside it?” I asked, staring at the two small locks of dark hair, each tied with a tiny piece of red silk.

  “One set of strands are from me and the other set are from Fallon.” Dracen snapped the locket shut and spread the chain apart just before he slipped it over my head. “The locket itself is your anchor to the college. The trillian will transport you to Trill in Ledmarrow. The strands of our hair link you to both Fallon and me.”

  “Link me to you in what way?”

  “You’ll be able to form a mental connection to either one of us or both of us, if you wish, at any given time. For me, it’s a precautionary m
easure in case we are separated while we’re in Fae territory. For Fallon, well, I thought the two of you would like to be able to speak to each other while you’re separated.”

  When I looked into Fallon’s eyes, I could see that he was uncertain about what I thought of such an arrangement. Obviously, he had agreed to it since the necklace contained a lock of his hair.

  I smiled at him and said, “I think that’s a wonderful plan. Will it bother you if I invade your mind like that?”

  Fallon shook his head as a relieved smile stretched his lips. “Not at all. I’m grateful we’ll still be able to speak to one another while we’re apart. Maybe I won’t worry about you quite as much.”

  “Now that that’s settled,” Dracen said, sounding relieved, “I believe Edmund has written down instructions and procured maps for the dragons to take to each of the fleets heading this way. All we need to do is go to Ledmarrow and hand them off to the fastest fliers the dragons have.”

  “Where is your talisman?” I asked Dracen, since he was supposed to make each of us one.

  Dracen reached into his right pant pocket and pulled out a bronze pocket watch on a thick, matching chain. A piece of trillian was embedded within the decorative cover.

  “This belonged to Isabelle’s father,” Dracen told me. “So it binds me to her and the chamber where Trill’s body is in Ledmarrow.”

  “So what is the plan exactly?” I asked them. “I know we need to go to Ledmarrow and give the dragons their instructions, but where do we go from there?”

  “We decided,” Fallon began to explain, “that your group should take a portion of the dragons with you to find Lanai. Considering where we met her in the woods, it should be far enough away from the Fae capital for you to go there without being detected. Once you’ve convinced her to help us, it’s simply a matter of waiting for the Kamoran fleet and our own armada to arrive before storming the city itself.”

  “I’ll be tagging along on this adventure too, if that’s all right with you, Your Majesty,” I heard Nicole Jardine, the commander of our special operation forces, say behind me.

  I turned around to look at her. “That’s perfectly fine,” I told her as she walked up to join us. “You probably know that side of the island better than any of us.”

  One corner of Nicole’s mouth lifted in a half-grin. “I’m sure I do. Plus, I can lead you directly to where we’re instructing the fleets to anchor their ships.”

  I turned back to look at Fallon. “How many of the dragons are we supposed to take with us?”

  “We thought we would leave that up to Gregoire,” he told me. “He’ll probably decide that we need the bulk of their forces here to help us in Iron City. But we have a plan that may help make it appear that you have more dragons with you than you actually do when you storm the Fae capital.”

  “And how are we going to work such a miracle?” I asked.

  Fallon looked over towards the door of the room as it opened.

  “Perfect timing, Isabelle,” Fallon said. “I was just about to tell Queen Emma about our plans for Thomas.”

  I turned to face Isabelle as she walked to us with the young man I saw earlier entertaining Dena in the dining hall with his magic. He had just conjured the illusion of a mastiff for Dena when I saw him.

  “The plan,” Dracen said, drawing my attention back to him, “is to have young Thomas here use his gift to conjure an illusion which will make it appear that we have more dragons with us than we actually do.”

  “But what if the Fae dragons try to attack one of his illusions?” I asked. “They’ll know right away that they’re not real.”

  “True,” Dracen admitted, “but hopefully our deception won’t be put to the test. Intimidation, even if it’s based on trickery, is a great tool to use in a war if implemented correctly.”

  Isabelle and Thomas came to stand with us in our small circle.

  As I looked at Thomas, I couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt for using someone so young in this conflict. He hadn’t even entered puberty yet, and here we were asking him to take part in a war I felt sure he didn’t understand.

  “Do you feel up to the task, Thomas?” I asked, giving him an opportunity to bow out of something he may have been coerced into taking part in. “I would understand if you would rather stay here instead.”

  Without hesitation, Thomas looked me straight in the eyes and said, “I want to go, Your Majesty. I want to do my part in the war.”

  He seemed steadfast in his resolve to help. Who was I to dissuade him just because of my own fears for his safety? But his involvement begged for another question to be asked.

  “Are we using any of the other children here at the college in this war?” I directed my question to Isabelle. Since the students here were under her care, she had been the one charged with deciding which of them would be the most useful to our cause.

  “I have chosen a handful of the most skilled students I have to help us,” she answered. There seemed to be a note of sadness in her answer, but it was overshadowed by her determination to do whatever it took to get the Fae out of our city.

  “And will any of your students be caught in the line of fire?” I asked. “Are they being asked to kill our enemies?”

  Isabelle briefly directed her gaze to the floor before she looked back up at me. “A couple of them are healers. A few have the power to conjure a smaller version of the shield I made to protect the college. They’ll be used to advance small groups of our troops into the castle to retake it. I’ve also asked a couple of the older students to aid in the attack in a more offensive capacity. Each of them has destructive powers that can be used to our advantage. Considering their talents, they may be forced to kill our enemies in order to protect our troops.”

  “Did you give them a chance to back out of joining the combat?” I asked. The luxury of having a choice to join the conflict wasn’t something many of us were given, but shielding our young from the horrors of war seemed to be the only humane option left open to us.

  Isabelle nodded. “Yes, I did allow them to choose, Your Majesty. I would never force any of my students to do something against their will or principles. All of them want to do what they can to help us retake the city.”

  “It’s one thing to want to do something,” I said, “but do you think they’ll be able to face their fears when the time comes for them to use their magic to kill people, even if it’s only to save their own lives?”

  “I have no way of knowing what they will do when they come face to face with their own mortality,” Isabelle admitted. “All we can do is hope for the best. Even our trained troops will be facing something new to them. None of us have ever fought in a war before now.” Isabelle glanced in Dracen’s direction. “Except for you, of course.”

  “Wars are always difficult and beset with their own unique problems,” Dracen told us. “It doesn’t matter if you’ve ever had to live through one or not.”

  “Up until now, we’ve only run simulations of battle conditions,” Fallon added. “But I have faith that our troops will do what they were trained to do. I think we all knew we would have to face war at some point. It’s just human nature to want more than you have and to take it by force if necessary.”

  “I guess we should be thankful that we’ve been able to live in peace for so many years.” It was a truth I hadn’t thought about until that moment. In the history of the world, war had been a common occurrence in most societies. Fallon was right. Whether it was a man who coveted his neighbor’s possessions or a nation hell-bent on strengthening their holdings, war was an inevitability in life. We had been fortunate to remain devoid of the horrors of it for so long. “Do I have time to change before we leave? I think I would prefer to wear my riding outfit if we’re going to be using dragon mounts to find Lanai.”

  “I need to get a few things together also,” Nicole said. “I’m not about to go over there without a few weapons handy.”

  “Why don’t we meet back here in thirty
minutes?” Dracen suggested. “I need to gather up some items as well.”

  “Do I need to bring anything?” Thomas asked.

  “Just yourself and a warm set of clothing,” Dracen told our youngest sorcerer. “It gets cold when you ride on the back of a dragon.”

  Thomas’ eyes lit up with excitement. After all, what boy his age wouldn’t want to ride a dragon?

  Fallon held out a bent arm to me. “I had some of the students retrieve your things from the airship and place them in your bedroom here. May I escort you to your room so you can prepare for your trip?”

  I accepted his arm and smiled. “I would appreciate that very much. Thank you for offering.”

  As we left our companions, I noticed Nicole watch Fallon and me with a half-smile. It wasn’t like we were trying to fool anyone, but we didn’t want to blatantly force our newfound feelings for one another in anyone’s face either. As long as we remained discreet, I saw no harm in our showing a little affection for one another.

  I happened to glance in the direction of the politicians and noticed that they were all watching us exit the room. It was just as well. As I told Fallon, we needed to prepare them for my decision to marry him after the war. The sooner they became aware of our relationship, the easier it would be for them to accept it later on. Out of the group, Gabriel and Thaddeus were the ones who watched us with the most interest. After we left the room, I let out a long breath, only then realizing that I had even been holding it in.

  “Are you having any doubts about us now that we’re back in the real world?” Fallon asked me as we walked down the hallway towards my room.

  I looked over at him so quickly I feared I might have strained the muscles in my neck with the action.

  “No,” I immediately answered. “Are you?”

  “Absolutely not,” he reassured me with a shake of his head, “but I’m not the one who has to work with a past-life spouse either.”