Winter Hearts

by A. E. Radley

  “She’ll be there?” Cass asked.

  “Yes. Holding court and saying heaven knows what to whom.”

  “I don’t know what to say about that. I’d certainly go with you, if you want, but I don’t think my being there would help.”

  Emmie sighed. “Thanks. I appreciate that, but you’re probably right.”

  “I hate to say this, but we tend to have our family gathering on Christmas Eve now too. It isn’t as elaborate as what your folks do these days, by the sounds of it. There’s church and then usually…in years past, we all gathered at Gran’s; me, her, my sister, the kids and usually any hands we still had and their families, if they wanted to come. This year, it will probably be just the family.”

  “That sounds nice actually, but it does sort of prove my mother’s point. Going forward, I’m going to want to spend holidays with you. I don’t know what I’ll do. I suppose I’ll ride it out this year and see what develops next year. We have a few other family holidays to get through between now and then.”

  Cass nodded her agreement, but she stared off at a wall, seeming far away.

  “What are you thinking about?” Emmie asked, gently.

  She shuddered slightly as she answered, “Paps. Things were a lot different when he was with us, especially at Christmas. We used to have these parties…always the Saturday before Christmas Eve. Everybody came. Aunts and uncles, cousins, all the hands and their families, neighbors from off down the road…everybody.

  “Even your mom?”

  “Usually, yeah…depending on her condition and where she was at the time. When she was in rehab…” She trailed off.

  Emmie changed the subject. “Why’d you quit having those?”

  “We had one the year after he died, and everyone still came but then, after that…I don’t know. I don’t know if Gran’s heart just wasn’t in it or if everyone just drifted away. For the last couple of years, we’ve just done Christmas Eve.” She got that far away look in her eyes again.

  Em let her be and got up to clear the table. As she scrubbed the pots, her own thoughts turned to Christmas’s past, even before Seth Jr. came along. What Cass had described was like her own experience. There had always been big parties at the ranch when they were kids, just before the holiday. They’d stopped when her brothers had families of their own, in-laws and other obligations. Now, Christmas Eve was all that was left.

  She whirled around and, leaning back against the sink, she said, “I was just thinking about traditions we’ve let go out at our ranch too. We used to have a big Christmas bash too, but it’s been seven or eight years ago since the last one.”

  “They get too expensive?”

  “No…at least, I don’t think so.” She told Cass about her brothers and their families. “That’s why they said we weren’t doing them anymore.”

  “So, traditions do change on the Oakes spread?”

  “That, they do,” Emmie said. “Maybe it’s time to start a new one that includes everybody.”

  Cass gave her a puzzled look.

  “What if we had a party somewhere neutral…or not…it’s short notice…I’m just throwing ideas out there, and we invited everybody? My family, your family, their families, in-laws, friends, neighbors, classmates…everybody?”

  “For Christmas Eve?”

  Em wrinkled her nose and thought. “Maybe not Christmas Eve. More like how both of our families used to do it, just prior.”

  “I don’t know. Maybe. It would be short notice for a lot of people.”

  “For this year yes, but what do you say we do it anyway and get something started?”

  Cass twisted in her chair and looked at the calendar hanging on the wall behind her. “You do realize, today is already the 8th,” she said, looking back over her shoulder. “When did you have in mind?”

  “How about Saturday, the 17th?”

  Cass chuckled and shook her head. “A week or so away? And I’m still in class to boot? There’s no way, unless you put it together all yourself, Em.”

  “The 23rd then? It’s not a Saturday…that’s Christmas Eve, but it’s a Friday and most people will be off for the holidays by then, able to travel around a little and still get back in time to their own family plans. That gives us a good two weeks to put it together and get the word out for anyone that wants to come.”

  “And can,” Cass put in. “We probably won’t get a big crowd but that could work. Do you really think we have the room to do a big bash here, though?”

  Emmie looked around with a critical eye and shrugged. “Not seated for a dinner, but if we clear some furniture and make it like an open house? People coming and going? They’re probably going to have more than one place to visit that night, being so close to Christmas Eve and all.”

  “Maybe so,” Cass said, nodding. She put a hand to her chin and leaned into the table, thinking. Out of the blue, she said, “While you’re at calling hours, I’ll go see Gran. Her place is bigger, and this might be just the thing she needs. She’s a heck of a planner, that’s for sure.”

  “Hmm, okay. Do you really think she’ll want to do this…especially with us?”

  “Let me ask you, do you really think your family will come?”

  Emmie gave that some thought. “I can’t honestly say whether my mom will. Probably. Her curiosity might get the best of her. Cora will be here with her crew.”

  “If they don’t have plans,” Cass put in.

  “No. I know my sister. She’ll be here.”

  “And your brothers and their families?”

  “Maybe…probably. There’ll be food, so there’s a good chance.”

  Jimmy wandered into the kitchen then. “Talking about a party? If there’s food, I’m there. That always wins me over.”

  CHAPTER 21

  Thursday, December 15th

  So close to Christmas, the hallways were always bedlam. Teachers tried to control peaceful movements from their classrooms to the art room, the music room and the gym, but there was only so much you could do with boisterous five to eight-year old children, focused this year a scant ten days ahead to the looming holiday.

  As she tried to herd her own group of twenty-five to the den of the art teacher, Mrs. McMorris, she maneuvered past one of the second-grade teachers she had mentored and coached just a few years before. She smiled at Michael Hull and dipped her head in an acknowledging nod. He looked away from her and then spun half way around to face the line of his students going the opposite way down the hall, back toward their classroom.

  “Don’t dawdle,” he called out to a couple of stragglers. “There’s spelling to do!”

  Emmie knew he’d intentionally avoided her. He hadn’t been stopping into her room in the afternoons on his way out to say hello and talk about this and that as he often did.

  The word was getting out and it wasn’t pretty. No one save Patrice and maybe Barbara Shone seemed to be on her side. She wasn’t too sure about Barbara.

  Emmie wondered how long it would be before parents started finding out. She thought about the playoff game the next night. She figured she’d get a few looks from parents there. It seemed like everyone was talking about heading to Arlington for the game now that the administration was closing school early to allow for people who wanted to go to have enough time to travel to the stadium more than three hours away. She figured many classrooms would be half empty on Friday anyway.

  She made sure all her students got on their buses and then spent a couple of minutes with Seth before her dad picked him up on his way through town.

  “You’re coming home with me this weekend.”

  “But I want to go to Tyler’s game tomorrow. That’s all Ritchie’s been talking about all day, Mom. He keeps telling me how his brother is going to whoop on some West Orange butts.”

  “Seth! That’s not very polite.”

  “Well it’s true, isn’t it? The Mustangs are going to win, aren’t they?”

  Against the reigning state champs? “There are n
o guarantees buddy, but I sure hope they do. I’m sure they’ll play their hardest.”

  The boy nodded, satisfied with that answer until he remembered his original statement. “What about the game? I really want to go.”

  “Since when are you so interested in football?”

  Seth gave her a look askance. “Everybody in Texas likes football, Mom.”

  Somebody has been feeding him the age-old line…my dad, my brothers, his friends…could be anybody. She let him off the hook. “We’re going, so you can let up, okay? Grandma will bring you to school in the morning and Grandpa will pick us both up from here. We’ll go to the game and then ride back with Cass from Arlington.”

  “She’s not staying there like Grandma and Grandpa?”

  “No sweetie. There are animals to take care of and other things that need to be done in the morning. We have to get back to the ranch.”

  Before he could ask another question, Dusty Oakes pulled up in his pickup and gave them a wave. She waved back, gave Seth a quick hug and then headed back to her classroom once he was on his way.

  She was grading math homework assignments from the night before when the speaker over the door buzzed and the Principals secretary called out to her.

  “Yes?”

  “Dr. Deaton would like to see you in his office, before you go…before you leave.”

  This can’t be good. She took a deep breath. “Okay. Please tell him I’ll be down there in a few minutes.”

  “Very well.” The speaker popped as the PA system cut back out.

  Emmie scratched a check minus on the top of the incomplete paper in front of her then gathered all the work up into her math folder and stowed it away in a drawer. Unnerved, she didn’t have the focus to finish them. She stood, smoothed her dress, gathered her things then drew in a deep breath before marching off down the hall to Kenneth Deaton’s office to face whatever fire he was going to bring to bear.

  Beatrice Stowe, a fixture at secretary since Emmie herself had attended grade school in the building, was on her feet, gathering her own things when she walked into the administrative offices. The gray-haired woman glanced at her, shook her head then looked away as she slipped on her coat.

  Once upon a time, Emmie had liked the woman, thinking her kindly. Now, as she approached seventy and continued to work, she’d become a cross and crotchety sort of person. Rumor had it, the school board was going to force her into retirement at the end of the school year. “Should I just go on in?” Emmie asked her.

  Beatrice waved an arm toward Deaton’s office and marched out the door, brushing past her.

  Emmie steeled herself, stepped up to the door marked Kenneth Deaton, Ph. D. - Principal and knocked softly. She didn’t wait for a response before entering. Let’s just get this over with, already!

  Deaton, a heavyset man with a penchant for three-piece suits, didn’t waste any time. She wasn’t even in the chair he’d indicated she should take when he said, “I’ve heard a rumor and I want to know if it’s true.” He pulled a handkerchief out of his breast pocket and mopped at his brow.

  “I’ve given you my resignation and plenty of notice, Dr. Deaton. What else do you need?”

  He shook a finger at her. “Don’t play dumb with me. We both know that’s not what this is about.” He crumpled the kerchief and jammed it into his suit coat pocket.

  She waited, silent. I’m not volunteering anything.

  He stared across his desk at her and then gave in. “Am I to understand that you’re living with a woman as…as…” He trailed off, unsure how to phrase the rest of his question.

  She quirked an eyebrow at him. “As what?”

  “Are you, or are you not living in sin with another woman?”

  She boiled at his tone and his obvious distaste. This can’t be headed anywhere good, no matter what I say. She thought about getting up and marching out and never looking back. Choosing a different tack, she asked instead, “Is there a reason you assume I’m living with a woman, ‘in sin’?”

  He leaned over his desk and steepled his hands. “I see what you’re doing. Stop turning this in circles. Is she your mother? Your sister? No. She’s not. There’s no logical…no acceptable reason for you to be…to be living with this woman.”

  “Let me put this another way then, Dr. Deaton; who I live with is none of your business.”

  “Whom.”

  That’s what he zeros in on? She rose. “Who, whom…how about, as my students say, whatever.” Where I live, as long as it’s in a county contiguous with the school district, is my choice. Good day.” She turned to exit.

  “Wait,” he said, holding up a hand. “We’re not finished here.”

  Oh, I think we are! She stopped and turned back toward him, but she didn’t resume her seat.

  He rose also. “I can’t have belligerence from my staff and immoral behavior modeled for the students. I’ll speak with the board. I’ll be recommending you be dismissed and replaced.”

  Emmie’s spirits deflated. “There’s…there’s no reason for that. I’ve done nothing to give any student…any parent pause. Nothing at all.”

  “You’re living with another woman in a…in a…a clandestine, sordid relationship. The damage has already been done whether you admit to it or not.” The finger shook at her again. “Do I need to remind you, we have a code of conduct here, which you signed?”

  “I’ll be gone at the end of the school year. You can replace me then with anyone you want to.”

  “That’s not good enough. I have students to consider and their irate parents!”

  “How long do I have?” Emmie asked. Her voice sounded hollow, even to her.

  “There isn’t a board meeting scheduled until after the break. If I had my way about it, you’d be on administrative leave effective immediately, but appropriate subs are in short supply right now.” He rounded his desk and moved toward her as he said, “You’ll work out the semester and keep your private life to yourself. You’re not to come onto school property with that woman or attend school related functions elsewhere with her. Do I make myself clear?”

  “Oh, crystal,” Emmie shot back.

  “You’ll want to be at the next board meeting. You have a right to be heard.”

  Funny you should mention it since your mind is already made up… Emmie turned on her heel and left.

  Patrice caught up with her half way to her car. “What’s got you moving like a ball of fire?”

  Emmie shook her head at her friend and kept moving.

  “Em? You can tell me anything. You know that, right?”

  She sighed as she slowed her step. She wanted to run right to Cass, but she thought, she’ll be working, and this is my battle.

  Patrice was still talking. “Em? Whatever it is, you can unload it on me. I’m here to listen.”

  “There isn’t anything you can do to help me.”

  “Maybe, maybe not. I can be your sounding board though…unless there’s someone else for that?”

  Emmie knew she was blushing, but she didn’t say anything.

  “You said we’d talk later, Em. It’s later.”

  She glanced at her friend. “Okay. But not here.”

  “I live with Cass…Cassandra, but she prefers Cass. I met her at the college during my TA assignment for my master’s thesis,” Emmie half whispered.

  Patrice sat on the other side of the booth with both hands wrapped around her coffee cup, nodding along to Emmie’s words.

  “You’re acting like you knew,” Emmie accused.

  “I knew you were with a woman,” Patrice whispered back. “I just didn’t have the particulars. The rumor mill hadn’t gotten quite that far.”

  “Shockingly. They’ve been talking about me for at least the past week.”

  “Where are you living?”

  “With her, on her ranch just north of Merkle.”

  “That’s it then. No one had the guts to tail you out of town.”

  “Someone must of. Deaton knows.”


  Patrice’s face fell. She sucked in a deep breath and let it out slow as she shook her head. “That’s why you were racing out of the building? What did he say to you?”

  “Before or after he fired me?”

  The other woman did a double take. “He did what?”

  “Shhhh!”

  “Sorry.” She lowered her voice. “Can he do that?”

  “Not without board action but he’s recommending to the board that I be let go. He’s going to have them take it up at the next board meeting.”

  “When’s that?” Patrice’s face creased with lines the woman in her thirties didn’t normally show.

  Emmie shrugged and spread her hands. “After the Christmas break, in January, sometime.”

  “You need to talk to the union rep.”

  Scoffing, she nudged her own coffee away. “What’s he going to do?” She leaned forward and whispered, “Bart Leeds is as homophobic as they come.”

  “He has to represent you Em. That’s his job. You need the union behind you if this turns into a fight.”

  “Not him. You know how he got elected to the position?”

  Patrice gave a half shrug. He was in there when I started here a few years ago.”

  Leeds is a typical Texas good old boy. He teaches primarily so he can coach the wrestling team and coach football. His whole goal in life is to become the head football coach. He was ramrodded through over a more qualified woman who ran against him.”

  “If you won’t talk to him, at least talk to somebody. Call the state teacher’s association if that’s what it takes.”

  “Let’s see what happens first. Frankly, if they let me go, so be it. I’ll get by until I start at the college. I’m not destitute.”

  “It’s not a matter of getting by, Em. It’s about being fair; doing what’s right by people. And, what about the kids? What happens to them if they let you go before the end of the year? A series of substitutes? It’s hard to get somebody out here to sub as it is. You’re talking about four or five months that your classroom door may be a revolving door.”

  “I hadn’t thought about it like that.”