The Ex-Wife

by Dow, Candice

I agreed to go with him although I really didn’t want to see an attempted murderer. It really bothered me that I hated this woman with a passion. It actually scared me. I prayed that I had enough sense not to kill her. One thing I knew for sure, if she tried anything with my baby, I would lose it and not care.

  As we approached the sheriff’s department, I noticed that Cam’s shoulders and arms tightened and his eyes narrowed. He couldn’t contain himself. It seemed he hated her as much as I did. He pulled into the parking space and we sat there for nearly ten minutes waiting for her. I asked him if he wanted to call her and he shook his head. I reclined my seat because I needed a nap.

  Suddenly, Cam mumbled, “What the fuck?”

  I sprung up to inquire. He opened the driver’s-side door. “This is some bullshit.”

  “What, Cam?” I asked, looking around to see what was going on.

  Cam stepped out of the car and I saw Caron and a guy walking toward the vehicle. The man was smiling hard and switching his hips even harder. He had muscles popping out of his tank top, and swished his hair back and forth as he talked to Cam. I saw Cam nodding his head, as if to say, “Whatever, dude.”

  Finally he and Caron headed back to the car. He opened the back door for Caron. I said, “Hey, Caron. What’s up, buddy?”

  He looked through me and didn’t respond. He was often like that when leaving his mother so I didn’t think much of it. I turned back around. Cam hopped in and we pulled off.

  When we got back home, Caron ate dinner and we went out to Rita’s for Italian ices. Caron seemed to be rejecting Cam’s affection also. I wondered what his mom could have told him to make him so cold. Caron’s mood would get better as the days went on, but it was always an adjustment. As Caron’s stepparent, all I wanted to do was love and encourage him through this period, but it was hard to connect with a child who didn’t want my love. All I could do was try to make the transition better.

  Once we were in for the night, Cam and I were alone and free to discuss what had been said between him and the guy who had dropped Caron off.

  “That guy works with Yasmin. Here’s the problem. Yasmin has had dude pick him up from school before and I’ve asked her not to do that.”

  “Because he’s gay?” I asked.

  “Partially, but mainly because he’s flamboyant. I don’t want my son around that. I mean, dude is like Yasmin’s best friend so of course he’s going to see him, unfortunately, but I’m not cool with him picking Caron up all by himself. That shit ain’t cool. You know what I’m saying?”

  “Yeah, I get you.”

  I was on my laptop and Cam was lying in the bed beside me. He looked over and said, “For the record, don’t have my son around that shit.”

  “Cam, I said I get you.”

  He raised one eyebrow, looking up at me, and said, “I’m just letting you know.”

  He smiled and started changing the channels on the television with his right hand and rubbing my stomach with his left. “You know, it’s good to know that you’re in love with a good woman and know for sure that that woman is going to always do the right thing for your little man.”

  I placed my hand on his forearm and rested it here. I wanted him to know that I would, whether we were together or not. I promised him that I wouldn’t make his life miserable just because I could. He looked at me as if he trusted me with his life. It was amazing that he had left himself open for love again. Most men wouldn’t have after being with Yasmin. But I was sure glad he had.

  Ayana

  I woke up on Monday morning and just wanted to lie in bed and have Cameron’s mother bring me food. She’d treated me like an angel from the second she discovered I was pregnant. It was no wonder Cameron was a great man. She would come to stay with us from time to time but she had a social life of her own, so she wasn’t planning on moving in. I wished she could be our full-time nanny, but Cam was concerned about her health. He didn’t want her to tire herself out ripping and running through the house after a crawling baby. Though I knew it would be a while before we got to that point, I agreed. It was probably best if the nanny we selected was there from birth instead of coming in once the baby was more active.

  Ms. Mae made pancakes with cheese eggs and bacon. She called upstairs and asked if I wanted her to bring it up. I told her that I’d come down. I went into the kitchen and we ate at the big kitchen table. Cam had dropped Caron off at school and he had other things to take care of. That left Ms. Mae and me there to have our good girlfriend conversation. She was so sweet and insightful. I loved her perspective.

  I sat down to a plate that looked like it had come from a restaurant’s kitchen. She’d sliced strawberries to garnish the plate. She grabbed her coffee and carried my orange juice over and sat it in front of me.

  She took a seat also. I said, “Ms. Mae, I love you.”

  “I love you too, sweetie,” she said, smiling.

  She was doing her unconscious thing of rubbing her feet together and rocking back and forth. She smiled at me. If the whole world had belonged to her, she would have given it to Cam. He was her pride and joy. The sun rose and set on him as far as she was concerned. I often felt that she looked at me with gratitude, that she knew her son had found a woman who would love and protect him forever.

  “Ms. Mae, I really appreciate you. You make the best food in the whole world. I wish I could open up Ms. Mae’s Soul Food Kitchen.”

  “Cam said he always wanted to open up a place for me.”

  “He’s faking. I’m serious.”

  “No, I think he’s just too busy doing his own thing,” she said in defense of her prince.

  “I’m sorry. You’re right. If he had time, he would.”

  “Yeah, but I’m getting too old for that now.”

  “You’re not too old, you don’t look a day over sixty.”

  “There’s a bunch of cars on the road that are all shined up but underneath the hood it’s some old parts. They might break down on the highway on you,” she said, laughing. “My insides are definitely eighty-one years old.”

  I didn’t laugh. Although I got her point and found it humorous, being stranded on the highway was a touchy situation.

  “Ms. Mae, can you believe that girl had someone tamper with my brakes?”

  “She is plumb crazy. You hear me? Plumb crazy. Do you know that I cried when he married her?”

  “Cried?”

  “Yes, Hal didn’t understand. He would say, ‘Mae, you gotta let him be a man.’ It just didn’t sit well in my soul. I was in pain.”

  “What didn’t you like?”

  “She came across as a sweet girl, but I just don’t know. You’ll see. A mother’s intuition is the strongest feeling a woman could ever experience. It can’t be explained or justified. Mothers just know.”

  “I hear that all the time.”

  “You won’t believe in it until you have that aha moment for yourself. And I think it’s even stronger for mothers and sons. I don’t know why, but when Cam was a teenager, I always knew when he was in trouble. I could feel it before going to one of his football games if he was going to hurt himself.”

  “Are you serious?” I paused for a moment. “Do you think that because you were older and calmer when you had him that you were more in touch with your intuition?”

  She shifted in her chair and frowned. “No. I was always calm, but Cam was a miracle so we may have just had a strong bond from jump.”

  “Yeah.”

  She smiled and shook her head. “Boys are just the best. You’ll see.”

  Whenever I talked to Ms. Mae, I got excited. Everyone close to me had little girls, so this was going to be a new experience for everyone.

  Ms. Mae decided to stay for the remainder of the week and said she’d go home after the baby shower. I sure wished she would just make the decision to move in with us. It would make it so much better for Cam and me. And while she wouldn’t be the primary nanny, I would feel safe with her in the house to assist. She might
have been old but I knew she was tough and that she would protect Cam’s son at all costs. Even Aaliyah loved being around her while she and Mandy were in and out of the house, preparing for the shower extravaganza.

  Cam and I invited damn near all of Atlanta. This was going to be the baby shower of the year. So many of our friends and acquaintances had felt left out of our wedding and they wanted to be a part of the birth of our baby. We agreed. Our marriage had been sudden and we hadn’t wanted anyone to question our decision. Now all our friends were in complete support of our union. We had two hundred guests confirmed.

  On Friday night Mandy, Cori, and Aaliyah arrived with huge Michaels bags. I knew whatever they had planned would be fabulous, because Aaliyah had vision like no other person I’d ever met. She could take a blank room and turn it into a palace. She’s always been like that. She’s a visual artist. I’d tried to convince her that she should be a party planner but she swore she only had time to take care of the girls. I hoped that having a nanny would free me up to do some of the things I had to do. There was so much on my plate. Yet I still wanted to be hands-on with the baby. I knew something would have to give.

  I fell asleep on the girls as they organized all their supplies and talked about where to put what. When I woke up on Saturday morning, Cam said, “You are lucky. Your sister and your friends are some down-ass chicks.”

  I pushed him because he knew I hated for him to talk like that. He said, “No, for real, you have got to see downstairs.”

  He amped me up as I rushed to the top of the stairs. White tulle was wrapped around our double stairwell from top to bottom. It looked prepared for a bride to enter. A large poster of one of the pictures from our maternity photo shoot was on a tripod in the middle of the foyer. Mandy, Cori, and Aaliyah had created a pyramid sculpture with the party favors, which were crystal clocks in little blue boxes with brown bows. The cocktail tables they had rented were covered with light blue tablecloths with brown sashes wrapped around the legs. The chairs were covered in the same colors. The centerpiece for each cocktail table was three tea light candles with white rose petals sprinkled around. They had placed the circular eating tables in the back, but hadn’t put the linen on them yet. The centerpieces for those were lined up on the island in the kitchen. They were tall glass cylinders holding blue feathers, each bunch with a blue-brown-and-white paisley bow wrapped meticulously around the middle.

  There was a long table in the dining room that looked as if it would be the dessert table. They had placed four stainless steel cupcake holders and a stainless steel chocolate fountain. There was a large empty space on the table, which I assumed was where the cake was intended to go.

  I looked at Cam and said, “Yeah, they are some down-ass chicks.”

  Everything looked so good and they weren’t even finished yet. This was the prep work. I could only imagine what it would look like once everything was finished. I was so excited. There was no way I could wait until four o’clock for this to go down. I was ready for all the guests to come now. I went into the family room and Ms. Mae was there, watching TV. I said, “Did you see everything?”

  “You have some good friends.”

  “I know. I don’t know what I would do without my sister and my friends.”

  “You got to be a good friend in order to have good friends. Those girls worked up a sweat last night. That says more about you than you can imagine.”

  “You’re too kind.”

  “I know, sweetie. I know.”

  I leaned over and gave her a hug just because I was happy. Cam and Caron went out to pick up breakfast. We decided to eat in the kitchenette in the sunroom so we wouldn’t mess up any of the decorations. Shortly after we ate, I was of course ready for a nap. I went upstairs to my room and snuggled up with my body pillow and I was out. I had an appointment to get my nails done at one and I woke up ten minutes before that time. I rushed out of the house. My manicure and pedicure were the things that kept me sane. If only for thirty minutes, someone rubbing my feet relaxed me.

  By the time I got back to the house, Aaliyah was already there. The girls were coming with her husband a little later. I hugged her as soon as I walked in. I said, “I’m sorry that I wasn’t able to make your showers this fab.”

  “You’re right. Maybe I’ll have another baby so you can make it up to me.”

  “Nah, don’t do that.”

  She laughed. “A’ight. Go and get ready. Don’t come back downstairs until the party starts.”

  “What if I’m lonely?”

  “I’ll send Cam up there with you.”

  I laughed and headed upstairs. The bed looked so appealing. Having a baby at thirty-six years old was definitely a challenge. It was like carrying a bag of bricks. I didn’t remember Aaliyah being so fatigued. I lay down and set my alarm for three o’clock, which was just twenty minutes away, but I wanted to be rested and refreshed for my guests.

  I came downstairs around ten minutes after four. I wore a light blue strapless maxi-dress with thin-strap flat silver sandals. My hair was pulled back in a bun. I went into the dining room to see the cake. It was a four-tier octagonal cake decorated with blue, brown, and white fondant. Each cupcake had a blue-and-brown cup, with white icing and a blue chocolate wafer with a B on it. There were balloons floating throughout the house. The DJ had set up outside and there was a speaker inside the house. He began to play a list of slow jams that Cam and I felt told the story of our love.

  Cam grabbed me and we danced to Alicia Keys’s “If I Ain’t Got You.” He looked in my eyes as we danced. He was intense and I knew that he felt all the words of the song. People began to pour in around four thirty. As they entered, Mandy directed them to sign the poster with words of wisdom and/or baby advice. This was the first time some of my friends had been to the house. They all loved the place and the decor.

  Aaliyah had mixed a special blue alcoholic drink and the caterers passed it around in tall glasses with a garnish of pineapple, cherry, and orange. They also passed around crab cakes, shrimp, chicken skewers, and spring roll appetizers. There were ice cream stations outside. It was more than I could ever have dreamed of. Everyone showed up.

  There were so many gifts from happy, encouraging people. Cam was glowing. I could tell that all his friends were happy for him. When men show up to a baby shower, you know they believe in the union. It was the best day of my life. I felt it was the perfect way to welcome our baby into the world.

  Dinner was about to be served when Aaliyah ran out in the yard calling my name in a frantic fashion. My sister and I should have been twins because I knew whatever was going on was going to upset me. I read it all in her face. My mouth hung open as two police officers followed behind her. I couldn’t form my mouth to say anything. Several of our neighbors were there, but I still assumed there had been a noise complaint or something. All I could think was, Not today. Cam headed over to see what the problem was. He said, “Can I help you, Officer?”

  I approached slowly, wondering why they were there to storm on my shower. One of the officers said, “We are looking for Cameron Small.”

  “I’m Cameron Small, sir.”

  It seemed like all two hundred of our guests surrounded us. Several of Cam’s potential investors were there. The officer pulled out his handcuffs. “Mr. Small, we have a warrant for your arrest.”

  Aaliyah looked at me, her eyes pleading for me to do something. Cameron took deep breaths. I was frozen still. I heard other people shouting. Why? What happened? Oh no, it must be Yasmin. I was speechless. My eyes shot over to Morris, Cameron’s high-powered attorney friend. He must have been perplexed too, because he didn’t move until I shot him a desperate look. Cam handed his cell phone to Aaliyah. As they were cuffing him, Morris stepped up to the officer and identified himself as Cam’s attorney. He requested to know the charge. The officers said something about harassment.

  Morris looked at me and said, “Don’t worry, sweetheart. I’m going to follow them and meet Cam at th
e station. I’ll handle it. I will call you as soon as I know more.”

  Water poured from my eyes. I had been hoping that Morris could do something to prevent them from taking Cam out of our home in those silver bracelets. Mandy hugged me. As they turned to walk him out, Cam said, “Don’t worry, baby. Morris got it. Stay here and enjoy the rest of the shower.”

  He asked the cops if they could walk him around the side of the house so his mother and son wouldn’t have to witness it and they did. He stayed calm and cool as if this were normal. He tried not to startle the guests, but everyone was already alarmed and confused.

  The entire crowd followed behind them. Morris walked closer than anyone. Morris’s wife touched his back and said, “Go ahead. I’ll be fine. I’ll catch a ride with someone else.”

  When they put Cam in the car, I lost it. I didn’t know what this was about. And it hurt. Of all the things Yasmin had done in the past year, this was above everything else. She had set it up to embarrass us in front of all our friends and family. I broke down on Mandy’s shoulder and she cried too. My mother hugged me from behind. “It’s OK, baby. I’m sure it will all be taken care of. It’s just an ugly misunderstanding.”

  “Why today, Mommy?”

  “I don’t know, Ayana. I don’t know.”

  I noticed Aaliyah crying also and I reached out for her to join our group hug. This was such a disaster on a wonderful day. The shower was over. Guests came out from inside. They were more confused and I heard different people explaining what happened. I just wanted to go up to my room and cry myself to sleep as if I were thirteen years old.

  We walked into the house and Aaliyah asked if I wanted to open the gifts. I couldn’t have done it if I’d wanted to. I looked at Ms. Mae and she was confused. She had gotten bits and pieces but she didn’t know that Cam was off in a police car headed to jail. My mother sat down beside her and explained what had happened. Ms. Mae claimed she had heard someone saying that Cam was being arrested on sexual harassment charges. My head was spinning because I honestly didn’t know if that’s what the officer had said. I looked at Aaliyah for clarification. She said, “I thought they said criminal.”