Blind Faith (Shattered Lives, Book Four)

by Blakeley, Rissa

  Finally, Cora reached out and allowed him to guide her over.

  “Cora, this is Carly,” Gunther said so quietly, it was almost unheard.

  Surprising Gunther, Cora wrapped an arm around his waist, her hand circling her belly. “Hello.”

  “Hello. Wonderful to finally meet you. I’ve heard so many nice things about you and your children.”

  “Likewise.”

  “When are you due?”

  “About another month-and-a-half to two, maybe more. I don’t know the exact date we-”

  “Right,” Carly interrupted. “Do you know what you’re having?”

  “No.”

  “Do you have a doctor? I found a really good one who’s low cost and not that-”

  “We’ve hired a doctor to visit once monthly to check the children and myself.”

  “I see.” Carly turned to Gunther. “So the wine…?”

  “Oh, right. We can leave it on the porch for now. You can take it home with you when you leave.” Joel stirred in Carly’s arms. Gunther touched his cheek, startling him. “Hey, buddy.”

  “Daddy,” Joel whispered when he opened his eyes.

  “Yeah.” Gunther held out his hands and Joel launched into his arms. “How’s my buddy today?”

  He snuggled into Gunther. “Hug.”

  “I do love your hugs. Are you ready to meet more of your family?” Joel gazed up at Gunther and nodded. He placed a small kiss on Joel’s forehead and proudly introduced him to everyone.

  When we sat down for dinner, my demons joined in, making my skin crawl. If I could’ve jammed the steak knife in my head without anyone noticing, I would have. There was a comment for everything said around the table. Such mockery and vile things. I did my best to keep my composure, but I was slipping fast. When Gunther’s phone rang, I about came out of my skin. Elaina reached under the table and rubbed my thigh.

  Gunther excused himself and walked into the living room.

  “Hullo?… Yeah… Okay… Of course… Countered at four twenty-nine?!… Christ. Are they mad?” He went silent, scrubbed a hand down his face and turned to face Cora. He measured her up, trying to read her emotions. “Sorry. Yeah, I’m still here.”

  Cora stood and walked over to him. “Gunther, no. It’s too expensive.”

  He locked gazes with her. “Parker, is there a remodeling grant?” He paused for several moments. “Ten percent? Wow… Okay… Yes, we’ll take it.”

  Tugging on his arm, Cora said, “Gunther, no!”

  “But don’t let them try to weasel another cent out of me… Absolutely. I’ll be waiting for your call… I’ll see you in a few days when we look at those locations… Thanks… ’Bye.”

  She stood in front of him, her hands on her hips. “Why did you buy it? We could probably get a similar house further out for so much less!”

  “Because of the look on your face when we walked into every room. You saw yourself living there. You loved it.” He placed his hand on her belly. “I can see us there. If the house will make you happy, I’m not worried about the cost.”

  “I don’t want you spending all your money on one house.”

  “It’s not all my money.”

  “Tell me about the business locations you mentioned looking at.”

  Gunther shifted his weight and gazed at me. “Henry and I are going to open a gym.”

  “That sounds great, but buying a storefront will cost money, too!”

  “Cora, do you trust me?”

  “Yeah…”

  “Then trust my financial decisions.”

  “I just don’t want you to-”

  He placed a finger over her lips. “Hush. Let’s go finish dinner.” He steered her around and ushered her back to the table.

  Once Gunther sat, Carly raised her glass of water. “Sounds like congrats is in order. Congratulations.” She nodded to Gunther and Cora. We all murmured our congratulations, clinked our water glasses, then finished our meal. Carly and Joel left shortly after helping clean up the kitchen.

  Elaina took Nicky upstairs to feed him one more time and get him ready for bed. I followed behind. My demons were too loud and I needed the solace of the dark room and my bed.

  I stripped to my boxers, settled on the bed, and watched Elaina fuss over Nicky—changing his nappy, clothes, and feeding him. He was staring up at her with such love in his eyes, reaching up to her face while suckling away. It was a lovely, quiet moment to witness, but the continued whispers ruined everything.

  My demons told me so much… All my fears wrapped in one messy little package. My son would hate me, my wife would leave me, I would die alone, my mum resented me because of who my father was. It was an endless onslaught of suspected truths that crippled me.

  I slammed my lids closed, digging the heels of my palms into my eyes.

  “Henry?” I jumped. “What’s going on? You’ve had a major up, then down day. You’ve been happy and proud, then short and withdrawn.”

  How can I hide it from her? I have no choice. I glanced at her and faked a smile. “I’m fine, love. I think all this noise around me has me a little on edge. It’s chaotic, making me out of sorts.” Okay, that’s sort of the truth.

  She stared at me for several moments until Nicky unlatched himself from her breast to cry. “Oh, little man, what’s wrong?” She lifted him to her shoulder and patted his back. “I think someone has a bubble in his tummy.”

  I watched her stand and pace with him, back and forth, patting his back until he settled enough to latch back on. Elaina’s patience for him amazed me every day. He was a trying baby with all his colicky crying but, bloody hell, she was a brilliant mum. She had come a long way since we had first met. I was damn proud to be her husband, although I couldn’t say the same for her.

  Gunther helped Cora get all the kids settled into bed. The day had worn her down and she was ready to relax. He reached around her body and opened the bedroom door. She turned and faced him.

  “Do you want to come in and talk for a few minutes?”

  “Sure.” He followed as she went to the bed. As Cora sat, she let out a sigh. “You all right?”

  “Yeah. Just exhausted.”

  He motioned to the bed. “May I?”

  “Make yourself at home.” He smiled and sat, leaning against the headboard. Cora cleared her throat. “So, about Carly… She’s beautiful.”

  “Yeah, she is.”

  “Joel is a very sweet boy. She has done well raising him on her own.”

  “Definitely. Thank you for being patient tonight. I know it must not have been easy for you.”

  Cora rolled her lips into her mouth and scooted to the headboard. “She’s young, sexy, vibrant, sophisticated, owns a business… I’m just a mom and a housewife.”

  “You’re more than that.”

  “I don’t think I am.” He turned to face her. “I’m nothing like her. She looks like Aphrodite, for crying out loud. A vixen. A sexual goddess. Ready, willing, and very capable of making strong men bow and want to pleasure her at any given moment.” Gunther chuckled. “It’s really not that funny.”

  “Look, I won’t deny she and I had a great time together, but it was all about the sex. She said she’s in love with me, but it’s not how I feel about her. I’m proud to say she is the mother of my son because of her strength and fortitude. Just know I am here with you. I’m not buying her a house, living with her, spending even the ugly times with her. I’m doing that with you.”

  “I needed to hear that,” she murmured.

  “I do regret my actions and wish I was there for Joel, but if I had been, would I be the same man I am today? I don’t think that would be the case.”

  “I think you’re right.” She stifled a yawn. “Things would definitely be different. A lot of us, if not all, would have died if you hadn’t been there to protect us.”

  “I think it’s time for someone to go to bed.”

  “Mmm, yes. I agree.”

  Gunther stood and headed to the
door. “I’ll keep you posted on the house.”

  “Just to let you know, I allowed you to touch me earlier so Carly could see we have something together.”

  A crushing blow. Not even turning around, Gunther muttered, “Thanks for that. And just when things were looking up.”

  “It’s all on my terms, Gunther.”

  He glanced over his shoulder. “Stop acting like a spoilt lass.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me. Spoilt. That’s how you’re acting.” He put his hands on his hips, mocking, “It’s all on my terms.”

  She narrowed her eyes at him. “So you think I should just allow you to touch me at any time?”

  “There is nothing wrong with showing affection through touching. Christ. I pat Henry on the back at least once a day. I hug Elaina. Sometimes we even hold hands when one of us needs that extra support.”

  “How do I know you mean it? You spent many months touching my face, accidently bumping into me, brushing up against me… And where did it lead us?” She pointed at her belly. “So if you think for one moment you can charm your way back into my bed-”

  “That is enough!” he growled. She recoiled and closed her mouth tight. “Why? Why are you acting like this?”

  “Because you hurt me.”

  “I’ve been spending all my time since I’ve come to terms with the baby trying to make it up to you, but you would rather push me further away than try to move slowly next to me.” He rubbed his palm over his chest. “Stop being obstinate for five minutes and realize what you’re doing to me.”

  “I don’t want to get sucked into your perverse tricks again. I want it true and genuine. I want it real, not just to put your dick where you want it.”

  “I’m through with this conversation,” he muttered, opening the bedroom door.

  “I want you to understand how much pain you have caused me.”

  “I think you’ve drilled it home…repeatedly. Goodnight.” Gunther slammed the door shut, only to see Anne standing in front of her door, staring at him. “Sorry you witnessed that.”

  As he tried to walk past, Anne grabbed his arm. “I know you care for her. It’s obvious with your actions. She’s allowed to be hurt over what happened between you.”

  “Let’s start with it’s not your concern. I’m allowed to get angry over her constantly holding it over my head. We will never get anywhere if she keeps this up.”

  “I agree. All you can do is keep trying.”

  “I lost a huge piece of myself when Quinn died. The fear of making a step forward cripples me. I’m trying, though. I don’t want to be like this. I want to be like everyone else who’s in lo…” He stopped himself.

  Anne raised a brow. “Sometimes you have to admit what’s in your heart in order for you to press forward.”

  “I will admit the pain and the guilt. I will admit I’ve made some really bad decisions that hurt everyone I care about, but here is where I am. I’m stuck. There’s no backward or forward.”

  “That’s where you are wrong. There is forward and it’s right through that door.” She turned and waved her hand at Cora’s room.

  He bit down on his bottom lip as the tears welled in his eyes. “I’ve done so many wrongs. I just want to be there for her and the baby. That’s all I am capable of right now. She needs to understand that pulling one minute and pushing the next doesn’t help.” He cleared his throat and stepped away. “I apologize for burdening you with my personal problems.” Before she could respond, he walked into his bedroom and closed the door.

  Anne shook her head and walked to her own room.

  Chapter 33

  Xander waited about a block down from the realtor’s office, anticipating a meeting between Luke, Gunther, and Parker. While hiding under the front porch, he had heard Gunther talking about it when the agent showed the house to him. He listened to the conversation Parker had over the phone and was already in position, a smirk on his face and camera in his hand.

  Luke and Gunther turned the corner and walked down the street toward Parker’s office. “There you are…,” Xander murmured, snapping a few photos, lowering the camera when they went inside. Then he leaned against the side of the building and chewed at his nails until he saw them exit the office.

  As the three crossed the street, Luke locked gazes with him. Xander panicked for a moment, then rounded the corner and took off running.

  Gunther and I headed to the village to meet up with the realtor to look at the locations for the gym. “You know, this walking bullshit blows,” I muttered. “We need to buy some vehicles.”

  “The object is finding ones that aren’t disgusting or cost a cool mil.”

  I laughed. “For real. I looked at a listing online for just a basic pick-up. The asshole wanted sixty grand! The fucker was ten years old and had almost two hundred thousand miles on it.”

  “Christ.”

  “You know he ran over some undeads with it, too.”

  “Probably.”

  “I’ll need to get an SUV of some sort. What are you thinking? A minivan? A bus? Totally can see you driving a minivan filled with car seats, ‘Baby on Board’ sign hanging in the window. Stick figure family-”

  “You really are a tosser,” he muttered. “You’re lucky I haven’t beaten your arse.”

  I chuckled as we stepped onto the sidewalk and walked to the realtor’s office. The door was propped open. Gunther went in and I followed behind.

  The realtor jumped out of his chair and headed right to us. “Mr. Erikkson, so glad to see you.” He shook Gunther’s hand, then pushed his at me. I glanced down before taking it. “I’m Parker Stewart. I assume you’re Mr. Erikkson’s business partner?”

  “Yes. Henry Daniels.”

  My first vibe was he was a shady motherfucker, a slimy dirtbag. Not sure why I felt that way, though.

  “Excellent,” Parker said with a smile. He knew he would be making a pretty penny off the two of us. He turned and faced Gunther. “I was actually about to call you when I realized you would be walking through my door.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yes. We have a closing date already. Six weeks from now.” A long string of obscenities came out of Gunther’s mouth. “Is that an issue?”

  “The woman I was looking at the house with is about to burst. I was hoping we could get in sooner. That’s all.”

  “I will do my best to get you in there as quickly as I can. I’ll call and see what I can pull off.” He leaned his shoulder into Gunther’s chest and, in a fake snide tone, said, “You know, this is the government. Who knows what they will do?”

  “Anyway,” I said with a raised brow. “Where are the locations you found?”

  “They are all right here in the village. I will warn you, though. Some are less than pretty.”

  “I really don’t care. Whatever we buy will probably have to be gutted anyway.”

  “Right. Well… Let’s go, shall we?”

  “Your best plan yet,” I muttered.

  Parker grabbed a few files and his keys from the desk as we headed out of his office. When we crossed the street, I noticed a man watching us from a block away. It took a minute before it clicked…

  The pot-bellied, mullet-wearing twat.

  I smacked Gunther on the arm. “Hey.” He turned and looked at me. “Parker, excuse us for a moment.” I grabbed his shoulder and guided Gunther away from Parker. In a heated whisper, I said, “We are being watched.” I turned and pointed to where the twat was.

  Gone.

  “Uhhh… Sorry, mate. Not seeing anyone.”

  “I keep seeing this guy everywhere we go. Pot-belly mullet, sunglasses.” I stepped off the curb and headed in the direction he had been standing.

  “Henry!” Gunther yelled, chasing after me. “Henry!”

  He caught me before I made it to the end of the block. Judging from his size, I knew the twat couldn’t have gotten far.

  “Go talk to Parker. I want to hunt this motherfucker down and
find out why he’s following me.”

  Gunther spun me around. “Mate, there’s no one around. It’s like a ghost town around here this morning.”

  “I saw him at the hotel when you first went to go meet Joel. Then I saw him just now. He’s following me.”

  “Do you realize what you sound like?”

  “Excuse me if I’m paranoid. I have reason to be.”

  He took me by the shoulders and shook me. “It’s over, mate. We made it. We survived.”

  “You may have survived, but I’m just getting started.”

  “That’s bullshit and you know it. You survived the moment you put a bullet in his head. I didn’t have a moment like that.”

  “You killed Drew and Bas.”

  “But they killed me first.”

  “I’m just as dead as you are.”

  We stared at each other for several long, painstaking moments. “Come on. Let’s go buy a storefront. We need this for us, for our families.” I nodded.

  Parker was standing against the streetlight with his arms crossed as we walked back. “Was wondering if I lost my clients for a moment.”

  “I apologize. My friend wanted to ask me a few questions,” Gunther said.

  “Hmm… I am more than happy to answer any questions you may have.”

  “It’s fine. I’m fine. Let’s just look at these locations.” I rubbed my neck. “I need to get home soon.”

  We looked at three establishments. Each one had bloodstains on the walls and carpeting, and smelled like death. The last one we looked at had an outline of a body on the floor, making me shudder.

  We ended up putting in an offer on two storefronts located right next to each other, a good-sized parking lot at the end of the building. We talked about knocking down part of the wall and using one side for equipment, the other for lifting. Then we’d open the back room for an instructional area, along with bag training.

  I was overwhelmed. Between getting permits, my demons’ nasty comments, and the continued paranoia, I was ready to scream and we were only at the buying stage.

  As soon as Henry and Gunther returned, Henry jogged up the stairs and went into his room. Gunther scooped Grey up off the floor. “How’s my monkey doing? Hope you’ve been good.”