Hell Inc.

by C. M. Stunich

  “You're already forgiven. As long as you give me your phone number. And maybe your name.” I couldn't help but smile back.

  “Ginger, Ginger Malloy. Feel free to laugh.” He didn't, just smiled, and I got butterflies in my stomach. Terrence pulled a cell phone from his pocket and handed it to me.

  “How about we meet at that brewery downtown on Olive for lunch? My treat.” Despite all of the horrible things that were happening to me, I kept having people volunteer to pay for food. I guessed it wasn't such a bad day after all. I nodded. Since the brewery was close to work, maybe I could spray-paint Rosanne's car while I was down there. I just hoped Blake wasn't going to be working. If Erin got word of this, I'd never hear the end of it. I finished programming my number into his phone and handed it back. “I'll see you around, say, eleven?”

  “You want me to get up that early?” I opened my mouth to argue, and he laughed.

  “I'm not a morning person either. Let's make it two.” His face fell serious, and he looked almost inhumanly beautiful for a moment. “You really are special, aren't you?” I blushed; I didn't really know what to say to that. Terrence glanced at Andrea and stood up suddenly, pushing the chair back. “Sorry to bother you, Mrs. Malloy,” he said to my mother and waved at us as he moved away.

  I was getting ready to ask him where the fire was when I saw Andrea. I had expected her to be curious about who he was and what we were talking about. Instead, her face was dark with a terrible anger. It took me aback for a second.

  “What's the matter?” I asked her tentatively, thoroughly confused. She slammed her hands down on the table and stood up. Most of the other patrons went quiet and began to stare. I leaned back and blinked at her. What the hell? Was she bipolar now?

  “You're my daughter,” she screamed. “Mine!” And with that, Andrea threw herself across the table at me, knocking my chair over and cracking my head against the tile floor. Alcohol and pain ran together and blurred my vision with flickering stars (no My Little Pony theme this time though). I clawed at her as she loomed large, her ridiculous nails gouging the soft flesh on my neck as she wrapped her hands around my throat and squeezed. I tried prying her off, but the impact had made me dizzy and weak.

  Just as the stars began to fade to blackness, hands reached down and pried me from her grip. One set of arms yanked Andrea back, and another set picked me up. Even with my impaired judgment, I recognized the person holding me. He smelled faintly like smoke, and his arms were almost unbearably warm: Levie.

  “Thanks,” I slurred. “I owe ya one.” I tried not to pass out. I really did. Vaguely, I heard a woman screeching, and my mind belatedly recognized the voice as Andrea's. What the hell had just happened? We'd been having a nice lunch, hadn't we? I didn't realize it at first, but I must have said something aloud because the last thing I heard before I passed out was the sphinx.

  “Who knows where the sands will take us?”

  When I finally awoke, I wished that I hadn't. There was an incessant pounding in the back of my head, and when I reached questioning fingers to tangle in my hair, they came away caked with dried blood. I sat up slowly, propped by my elbows and waited for the spinning to stop. I was tucked into my bed, and upon further inspection, I realized that someone had stripped me of all but my bra and underwear. But who? I looked over the edge of my bed and found the sphinx lying comfortably on my area rug. “Um.” At the sound of my voice, it looked up at me and smiled.

  “What is more precious than all the gold in Egypt?” it asked me and sat up, trotting out of my room. Its body was far too large to pass through a normal doorway, but as it approached, the opening shifted to accommodate it. It was a bizarre twisting of space that threatened to turn my headache into a migraine. I rubbed my weary eyes and squeezed them shut for a moment. When I opened them, the doorway had thankfully shifted back to normal. I'd seen it before, true, but it never got any easier.

  “Christ, I could use a drink,” I groaned, wondering briefly if this whole wishing thing was going to be the straw the broke the camel's back and turn me into an alcoholic. As I was attempting to swing my legs out of bed, Levie entered the room followed by the sphinx. I closed my eyes to avoid more awkward dimension twisting and opened them to find the demon standing directly in front of me, frowning.

  “What, may I ask, do you think that you are doing, you stupid girl?” I looked up at him and shrugged. Even that little bit of movement created white spots in my vision.

  “Getting up, I think. Why do you care anyway?” Levie said nothing, just moved out of my way. That's when I remembered that I wasn't wearing much. I threw myself back under the covers and gasped as a wave of dizziness hit me. I felt like I was going to pass out again. “How did I get here? Who undressed me?” I choked out.

  “I did, of course. Who else did you expect? That ... man ... from the museum I suppose.” At this, Levie's usual scowl deepened into something more sinister. What does he have against Terrence? I wondered. He doesn't even know him.

  “You undressed me?” The very thought of Levie carrying me, passed out, to my apartment and taking off all of my clothes sort of freaked me out. He had every chance to take an advantage. How would I even know? “You didn't ... you didn't ... you know. Did you?” I squeaked. If the look on his face was anything to go by, the mere thought of touching me horrified him.

  “Are you suggesting that I would need to take advantage of a helpless woman to satisfy myself?” Levie puffed out his chest like some sort of rooster or male peacock and glared threateningly at me. “Do you not think that I could have a woman fairly if I so chose? Do I appear hideous to your eyes?” I decided not to say anything more; it didn't appear that there was an answer I could give that would satisfy us both. At least now I was fairly confident that he hadn't touched me more than necessary. Watching the sphinx look from me to Levie doubly reassured me. And besides, he wasn't really that kind of guy, was he?

  “Why did you help me out?” I asked, trying to change the subject. “Wouldn't it be better for you if I died now rather than later? Then you could go home.” A look of irritation crossed Levie's features before he pursed his lips and looked down his nose at me.

  “If you had died, there would have been complications as you have not received you third wish; it's a violation of our contract. Besides, since it would have been your mother who would have caused your death, I would be even worse off than I am now. Uncle Lucifer considers it my fault that you made that horrid wish in the first place. If it were to kill you prematurely, it would not be question of the rack or the pits: it would be the river.” I wasn't exactly sure what 'the river' was, but I was pretty sure I didn't want to ask. I fought down a small stab of disappointment that his motives weren't more knight-like. You know the kind, save the pretty maiden for the sake of chivalry? Not that I was into that (I wasn't, really), but I sighed anyway. Oh, well. Guys like that didn't really exist. I was old enough to have figured that one out by now.

  But wait. The other pair of arms, the ones that had pulled my mother off of me. Who? I looked up at Levie and wondered if he would tell me. Before I had a chance to ask, the phone rang. Levie snorted and turned away, as if offended by the sound. I answered it anyway. “Hello?” I asked, hoping to high hell that it wasn't my mother. I didn't know if I ever wanted to speak to her again.

  “Ginger?” The voice on the other end was pleasant but not all that familiar. “I told him you should probably go to a hospital, but he refused, and I wasn't sure what he would do to you if I argued with him. I've never really met a demon before.” Aha. The other pair of arms. Terrence. I knew it. I couldn't help the grin that split my face. He called just as I was thinking about him. Maybe we're psychically connected or something?

  “That was probably a smart idea,” I said, glancing at Levie and then cupping a hand around my mouth. “He's kind of a temperamental asshole.” Terrence laughed, and I felt the butterflies take off in the pit of my stomach again.

  “Well, I'm glad to hear that you
're okay. I was really worried. Are you sure you're still going to meet us at the restaurant tomorrow? I'm sure the crew would understand if I explained.” I was just as sure that 'the crew' wouldn't, but I didn't really care what they thought.

  “Yeah, I'll be fine. I'm just a little dizzy.” I remembered the dried blood that was matted into my hair. “And in need of a shower.” I could almost feel the smile that I heard next in his voice.

  “Well, take care Ginger Malloy, and I will see you at two tomorrow, if that's alright?” I wished that we were meeting for a more pleasant reason but hey, I was going to take what I could get and not complain. I'd been waiting a long time for a lunch date with the Queen Bee.

  “Sounds good, Terrence,” I replied, noticing the angry movements that Levie was making with his wings as he pointedly looked everywhere around the room but at me and the phone. I was about to say good-bye and hang up when Terrence spoke again.

  “Oh, and Ginger ... I wasn't sure what to do with your mother so I just let her run away. I hope that was okay? I can't help but feel responsible for interrupting your lunch.” It really didn't matter to me what had caused her to act like that. It was horrible, not to mention just plain weird. The most tragic part about all of it was that even in her worst drugged state, she'd never tried to hurt me like that. I think I was beginning to understand what the Devil and Levie were worried about. What if I had accidentally wished for a boyfriend? I shivered.

  “No, it wasn't your fault and thanks for letting her go. Don't give it another thought, okay? I'll see you tomorrow, and I'll bring the sphinx. Good night.” I hung up before he had another chance to speak and let out a deep sigh. Levie snorted again, and I wondered what his problem with Terrence was. “Why do you hate him so much?” Levie stalked towards the doorway as if he hadn't even heard me but stopped before he reached it and turned back around.

  “I hate all humans. I merely find that one in particular to be an ungracious fop.” It sounded like a load of crap to me, but I let him continue his predator walk out of the room and looked back at the sphinx.

  “Is he this weird because he's a demon?” I asked, and the sphinx merely blinked. “Or because he's a man?” It couldn't even come up with a riddle to answer that one so I shrugged off the overall feeling of irritation at his attitude and continued on my quest to get out of bed and crawl into the shower. The sphinx watched me carefully as I stumbled over to my dresser and opened the top drawer. I rummaged around blindly, trying to blink away the last of my vision spots until I found a comfy T-shirt and some pajama pants. Both faded, both oversized, both comfy.

  The steam and water felt fantastic on the rest of my body, but my head still ached, especially when I shampooed the blood out of my hair. I lingered long after I'd finished, washing until the water ran cold then dressed in the pajamas and ventured into the living room to see what Levie was up to.

  He was sitting crossed legged on the couch reading a romance novel. Surprise, surprise. What else did he ever do? He ignored me, also not unusual, so I went over and sat next to him on the couch. The sphinx followed me in and curled up into a ball near the kitchen doorway, releasing a contented sigh and closing his eyes.

  “Why do you like those things so much?” I asked, examining the cover which featured a tall, hairy man wearing a loin cloth and a blond woman passed out in his arms. “Is it the sex parts you like or the romance?” Levie adjusted the spectacles he only wore when reading and licked a finger. He turned the page and kept reading. I puffed my cheeks out and settled into the couch cushions. “You just don't seem like the type that would read that kind of stuff,” I explained needlessly. Still, no reaction. Fleetingly, I wondered what he would do if I grabbed the book from his hand and threw it across the room. It seemed silly, even to me, but for some reason, his lack of attention was even more annoying than his insults. “I wonder where my mother is now. She always just crashed with other druggies. Now that she isn't one, where would she stay?” Levie sighed and removed his glasses, folded the book closed, and laid one on top of the other on the coffee table.

  “Human,” he said, slowly. “Since I first met you,” he leaned towards me, and I bit my lip as he placed a hand on the couch between my thighs to steady himself. “I haven't had one moment of peace to read my ... erotica ... as you so lovingly phrased it at our first meeting. Now this book,” he gestured at the novel with his other hand. “Is a new copy of the one your incompetency caused me to ruin previously. What I want from you,” he purred, and I gasped as he ran his nails down my throat. “Is for you to either shut your mouth or,” Levie leaned forward even further and placed his lips a hair's breadth away from mine. “Use it for something more productive.” The gap between us closed, and he pressed his lips firmly against mine, pushing my mouth open with his tongue. So surprised was I, that I forgot to protest and sat there, unmoving. My heart was racing furiously as my brain tried to remind me that the bastard had just insulted me and deserved to be shoved back and slapped across his pretty, little face.

  Suddenly, Levie pulled away, a smug look in his eyes and a smirk on his lips. “If you really must know, I like romance and sex.” He said the word like it was a smoldering piece of charcoal resting on his tongue. It made the hair on my arms stand on end. “Now, run along and let me be. I want to finish the scene where the cunning villain seduces the pretty yet unfortunately, rather dim-witted heroine. And I must finish it quickly as I need to rest because there is no doubt that I cannot leave you alone for even a minute.” Then he dismissed me, just like that. I sure as hell hoped that the reference to the heroine had nothing to do with me or I might have decided to castrate him in his sleep. I still said nothing as he picked up his glasses and book and resumed reading. What could I say? Score one for Levie, zero for Ginger? I should have known better than to let him get to me like that. Suddenly, an idea struck. It might work or it might not, but I had to give it a try. A girl could only take so much, and I thought I'd taken more than my fair share.

  “Oh, Levie,” I whispered, scooting forward and pressing my breasts against his arm. He looked at me, smugness and male confidence written all over his face. “I just want you to know that since the first moment I met you,” I reached down between his legs, my hand over the bulge in his pants. “I've wanted to do this.” I slammed my fist down as hard as I could, effectively punching him right in the nuts.

  Levie dropped his book and doubled over, grunting in pain. I jerked away before he could retaliate and ran to my room. I paused in the doorway and watched him, sweat beading on his forehead as he cupped his crotch tenderly. “Levie, darling,” I cooed sweetly and tried to suppress the satisfied grin that wanted to take over my face as he stared daggers at me. “You really shouldn't touch a woman without her permission.” I waved at him and shut the door behind me, laughing.

  I was late in getting up, but at least I was alive. Levie hadn't come in and killed me in my sleep, which was a miracle after I'd insulted him. I stayed in my room as long as I could, and when I did need to go to the bathroom, I ran without looking at the living room. Finally, I couldn't stall any longer and carefully made my way out of the bathroom and down the hall.

  Levie was sitting in his usual manner, novel in hand. A different one from the night before but one I had seen previously, with the Fabio-maid cover. I coughed lightly to get his attention. He actually paused his reading and closed his novel. “Did you finish your other book last night?” I asked conversationally. Levie glowered at me and curled his lip in disgust.

  “Actually, human,” he stood up as the sphinx stretched and watched us with interest. “I did since I was unable to sleep.” Levie grit his teeth and ripped the spectacles off of his face. “The pain in my groin was so great that I could do little else but sit and try to focus on my reading.” I tried not to laugh but failed.

  “Who is to blame when the pyramid does not stand? The slaves or the slave master?” the sphinx asked us. This riddle seemed so appropriate to the situation that I laughed harder a
nd almost choked in surprise when Levie was right in front of me.

  “Whoa, there.” I stepped back from him against the wall. “I didn't see you move.” Levie grabbed my arms and slammed my wrists against the wall.

  “No Ginger, you did not because I did not wish you to. I, I am a demon, and you are just a human. Remember that next time you decide to insult me.” I should have been frightened, but apparently something must have been wrong with that part of my brain because I wasn't.

  “You know what, Levie. I don't really care because you insulted me and you deserved it.” I locked my green eyes on his orange ones and smirked. “And you know what? Administrative assistant is just a fancy word for secretary.” The look on his face didn't shift from anger to outright fury like I'd expected. Instead, he smiled, and for some reason, that was much, much scarier.

  “Be careful human. Because I'm not finished with you yet.” Levie licked the side of my face and then released me abruptly. I brushed demon saliva from my cheek with the sleeve of my jacket and gave him a look of disgust. God, we made a toxic combination, but I was intrigued. Damn it.

  “If time stands still for none, then where does time go to seek rest?” The sphinx riddled, reminding me that we were late.

  I grabbed my keys and led the way out of the apartment. This ... situation with Levie was getting out of control, but I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do about it. I guessed that if I wanted to get rid of him, I would have to make my last wish. But did I really want to end all of this? My life was suddenly a lot more interesting than it had been before. I decided to put these thoughts on the back burner as we neared my truck. I paused before getting in and turned to face Levie and the sphinx.

  “You,” I said, pointing at it. “Are coming with me. But Levie,” I gave him a look of amusement mixed with pity. “You can't come, not after that scene you threw the other day. The wait staff will call the cops if they see you.” Levie looked ready to protest. “There's no way, Levie. They can't see you. I'll give you what money I have left and you can wait at the cafe across the street, okay?”