Without Regret (Broken Roads Book 1)

by Cat Mason

  “You son of a bitch!” Charging forward, I slap him hard across the face. “You never wanted her! You never loved either of us! I just buried my parents today, it’ll be a cold day in hell before you take my baby!”

  Before I can react, he slams me into the wall. His fingers wrap around my throat so tightly I can barely breathe. “Remember your place, bitch.”

  “Motherfucker!” Ray roars. Grabbing a fist full of Tim’s shaggy brown hair, he slams his face into the kitchen table. Tim’s hold on me loosens. I collapse to the floor, coughing and gasping for breath. Knocking over a chair, Ray tackles Tim, punching him in the jaw as he pins him to the tile floor by his throat. “Think you’re such a badass now, don’t you, you piece of shit? Does knocking her around make you feel like more of a man?” Ray asks, punching Tim in the ribs. “That’s my girl you put your hands on,” he growls, bashing Tim’s head into the tile. “The mother of the child you haven’t even fucking asked about.”

  “Ray, stop!” I shout, scrambling to my feet and grabbing his forearm. His elbow collides with my stomach, knocking the air out of me as I fall back into the wall.

  A pair of arms wrap around me, steadying me as I start to fall. “The fuck is going on in here?” Zack says loudly. Hoisting me up onto the bar, Zack yanks Ray off of Tim and shoves him towards me. “Snap out of it, jackass. I’ll take out the trash, you handle your girl.” Hauling Tim to his feet, Zack laughs. Balling up his fist, he slams it into Tim’s stomach. “With love from Alyssa, fucker,” Zack grunts, shoving him into the wall.

  “Tim,” I call out, causing him to stop and meet my eyes. His nose and lip are bleeding, his jaw swollen as he clutches his side. Dropping to my feet, I stand tall and take a step towards him. “Go home. You’re not wanted here.”

  “This isn’t over, woman.” Glaring at me, he spits blood on the tile. “You think he really loves you? He’s going to throw you away the second someone better comes along. And, trust me, better will come along. It always does. Don’t come crying to me when you end up alone, bitch,” he bites out angrily. “You deserve it.”

  “You’re right about one thing, asshole,” Ray grounds out in warning, stepping in front of me. “This,” he says gesturing between them. “Isn’t over. Show your fucking face here again, if you even try to contact Rachel again, I’ll be happily waiting to finish it.” Turning to face me, he brushes the tips of his fingers over my face and neck. Wincing, I recoil from his touch. His face falls. “Baby, I’m so sorry,” he chokes out, the color draining from his face. “I’ve never been so angry in my life. Did I hurt you?”

  “I’m fine,” I choke out as the front door slams. Pushing by him, I head for the sink. Switching on the faucet, I splash cold water on my face. Bracing myself on the edge of the sink, I remind myself to breathe.

  “Stupid motherfucker,” Zack says strutting into the kitchen. “He’s lucky Kate couldn’t find the keys to the goddamn gun cabinet. She was ready to lock and load the minute she heard that bastard start running off at the mouth. Nothing like the promise of justifiable homicide to temporarily snap you out of your all-consuming grief.”

  Shutting off the water, I grab a hand towel from the drawer and dry my face. “I need to call a lawyer in the morning. If he thinks he’s taking my baby, he’s got another thing coming.” Pressing my back to the counter, I look at Zack. “How’s Kate?” I ask, wanting to change the subject.

  “She feels guilty for making it when they didn’t,” he replies sadly. “She has nightmares. Bad ones. Takes her hours to fall back to sleep after. It rips my heart out.”

  “I can’t imagine having been in that car,” I reply, honestly. My entire body shudders at the thought. “Seeing what she saw.”

  “Alyssa seems to break through some of that,” he adds. “Kid puts a smile on Kate’s face immediately. Only thing that does right now.”

  I nod sadly. “I’m going to shower. I’ll come up and get Alyssa in a bit.”

  “Take your time,” he replies. “Maybe Kate will actually sleep soundly with Alyssa lying there with her. I’ll bring her down if she starts screaming for food or pukes on me again.”

  “So…” Patting Zack on the back, Ray laughs. “Either way, we should listen for a little girl screaming.”

  “Don’t be a hater,” Zack argues, punching him in the shoulder. “Even a bomb has a timer. The kid is cute as hell, but a little warning would be stellar as fuck.”

  Shaking my head, I make my way up the stairs and grab what I need from my room before heading in to shower. Switching on the water, I begin stripping out of my clothes when I catch my reflection in the mirror. Stepping closer, I run my fingers along the red marks Tim left on my neck.

  “That motherfucker,” Ray growls, stepping into the room and closing the door behind him. Locking the knob, he closes the distance between us. Brushing the hair from my shoulder, he wraps his arms around my middle and presses his lips to my shoulder. “You sure you’re okay?”

  Gripping his forearms, I close my eyes. “Yes,” I breathe. “Being in your arms makes everything better.”

  “Let me love you, Rachel,” he pleads, his words rushing over my skin.

  Turning in his arms, I look up into his eyes. The blue haunted and filled with emotion. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I nod my head. “Please.”

  His lips collide with mine in a bruising kiss. Gripping my thighs, Ray urges me up onto the countertop beside the sink. Kicking off his shoes, Ray strips out of his clothes. Sliding to my feet, I step forward and wrap my fingers around his cock. Ray’s hips jump as he hisses through his teeth. My thumb brushes over the tip. His mouth drops open, his tongue darting out to lick the lips that I have felt on every inch of my body.

  Walking him backwards into the brown and black stone shower stall, I smile at him and drop to my knees. “No,” he pleads, his hands dropping to my shoulders.

  “Let me love you, Ray,” I reply, mirroring his words from moments ago.

  Leaning forward, I press a kiss to his abdomen. Ray’s palms flatten against the wall at his sides, bracing him to the wall. Looking up at him through my lashes, I watch his eyes as I trail kisses across his pelvic bone and I slowly stroke him from base to tip. Sucking the head of his erection into my mouth, I tease him with my tongue before taking him deep.

  “Goddamn,” he moans, the sound making my toes curl.

  My fingers run up his thighs, wet from the spray of the warm water. Moving around his hips, I dig my nails into his ass. I need more of him. All of him. I want to get lost in this, in us, in the love that I have for this man. Everything else fades away; there are no tears to be cried, no fear of the unknown, no doubt of what is just about to come around the corner.

  All of that shit will still be waiting, but we have moments like this to cling to.

  Shifting his body, Ray drops down onto the stone shower seat. Grabbing my arms, he pulls me to my feet and settles me in his lap. “I want to be inside you when I come, Baby.” Fisting his length, he slowly slides inside me. Rocking against him, a long slow moan escapes my lips. “Need your body wrapped around mine.”

  Gripping the back of my head, he slams his lips to mine. Ray’s other hand grips my ass, encouraging me to move. Bracing my hands on his shoulders, I give us both what we want. Breaking our kiss, Ray buries his face in my neck. “Yes, baby,” he pants. Slipping his hand between our bodies, his fingertips find my clit. Throwing my head back, I fall apart in his arms. “Look at me, Rach,” he breathes. My eyes snap open, locking on his without hesitation. “I love you,” he says, leaning in to brush his lips over mine. “Love you so fucking much.”

  The cries of my second orgasm are lost to his kiss as Ray finds his release. Pulling me tightly to his chest, his body stills. His chest rises and falls rapidly as his hands trace over the curves of my body. Lying my head on his shoulder, I smile as my fingertips run along his forearm. “I love you too.”

  Chapter 20

  Ray

  Lying in bed beside Rachel
as she sleeps, my mind won’t shut off. It keeps replaying everything Tim said over and over again. The image of that bastard grabbing Rachel by the throat and slamming her into the wall like a ragdoll will be forever seared into my brain. I have never been a violent person, never hated someone in my life.

  Until now.

  I fucking hate Tim Willis. I understand why Grant wanted to keep him as far away from Rachel and Alyssa as possible.

  Knowing that sleep isn’t coming anytime soon, I climb out of bed. Tucking the blankets around Rachel, I brush the hair from her face and press a kiss to her temple. Her brow furrows, her nose scrunching up, but thankfully she doesn’t wake. The last few days have taken a toll on her, she needs her sleep.

  Navigating the room as quietly as I can, I stop at the crib. Looking down at Alyssa as she sleeps, I feel my chest tighten. There is no fucking way I can let that piece of shit anywhere near my girls. If Tim were to follow through on his threat of a custody fight, and win, it would devastate Rachel. Losing Alyssa to a man like that, for any length of time, would be the worst thing that could happen.

  Running my hand over her brown hair, I smile as she scrunches her face in the same way Rachel does. She whimpers softly, her little mouth moving as if she were dreaming of eating.

  Yanking on my clothes and shoes quickly, I grab my keys, phone, and wallet from the dresser and head downstairs. Flipping on the kitchen light, I grab the phone and hit redial.

  “Yeah.”

  “It’s Ray Mitchell,” I bark into the phone as soon as he answers. “We need to talk.”

  “The fuck do you want?” Tim asks, angrily. “Tell that bitch the time for talkin’ is over. She can talk to my lawyer.”

  “Rachel doesn’t have anything to do with it,” I inform him, reigning in my temper so I don’t wake anyone up. “You and me. Give me the when and where. I’ll be there.”

  Tim rattles off the name of a hotel along with a room number. “I’ll be waiting,” he says before the line goes dead.

  Grabbing the spare set of house keys from the hook beside the front door, I lock up behind me and head for my car. The entire drive downtown, I debate what I will do once I come face to face with this prick again. Honestly, I hadn’t gotten that far before I decided to call and demand he see me. My only thought was I couldn’t sit by and do nothing. I am hoping inspiration strikes, and I figure out a solution that doesn’t involve me having to tie him to a concrete brick and toss him into the river.

  Even if he does deserve it.

  Parking beside his truck, I breathe deep. Climbing out of the car, I walk up to the door. It swings open before I can even knock. “Thanks for seeing me so late,” I say, when he gestures for me to come in.

  “Work nights,” he blurts, slamming the door behind me. “I was up.” Walking over he drops into one of two padded chairs at a small round wooden table. “Say what you’ve gotta say,” he says, leaning back in the chair and propping his arms behind his head. “Or did you come all this way for an uninterrupted round two?”

  Shoving my hands into the front pockets of my jeans, to discourage myself from taking advantage of his offer for round two, I look him square in the face. “What will it take for you to go away?”

  Propping his feet up on the table, he scratches his chin, entertaining my question. “Twenty-five thousand dollars.”

  “You have no fucking idea how bad I want to kick your teeth down your throat right now,” I ground out, my hands fisting in my pockets.

  “Oh yeah?” Tim asks, not moving. “Why’s that?”

  “Because you actually have a dollar amount in mind.”

  Dropping his feet to the carpet, he leans up in the chair. “What’s the matter?” he asks with a laugh. “They not worth that much to you?”

  “Actually, no,” I answer honestly, shaking my head. “I could never put a price tag on Rachel and Alyssa. It pisses me off that you can.”

  “You’re a fucking idiot,” Tim laughs. Reaching over, he yanks open the mini fridge and pulls out a half empty bottle of bourbon. Twisting off the top, he tosses it to the table before taking a long pull straight from the bottle.

  “I could say the same about you,” I fire back, not moving closer, even though I want to bounce his face off that table too. “You had her. She loved you. There was a time she’d have married you in a heartbeat. She got smart, realized she didn’t have to take your shit. Figured out she could do better. Now, she’s mine; because you didn’t have a fucking clue how to treat her. That makes you the fucking idiot. Not me. I only know that, as long she’ll have me, there will never be a day that goes by where those two beautiful girls ever doubt what they mean to me. They will know every day that they’re loved. That doesn’t mean I deserve her any more than you do, because I don’t. That woman is better than either of us ever deserve in this life. It just means I’m smart enough to realize that I don’t want to go back to the way my life was before she walked in to it.”

  Blowing out a breath, his eyes drop to the table. “Get out.”

  “What?” I ask, confused.

  “I said get the fuck out,” he roars, throwing the bottle at the wall. The glass shatters, falling all over the floor beside the mini-fridge. Standing to his feet, he shoves by me and yanks open the door. “Keep your goddamn money. I don’t want a motherfucking thing from any of you. File the paperwork. You want ‘em so damn bad, they’re all fucking yours.”

  “You’ll sign away your parental rights to Alyssa?” I ask, making sure I heard him right.

  “Pal, if that’s what you fucking want,” he replies, shaking his head. “You got it.”

  “There’s nothing I want more,” I reply, walking through the door and towards my car.

  Rachel

  Alyssa looks up at me, her soft brown eyes drooping sleepily as I hum. Her fingers curl around mine. Cooing, she tries to tug my finger into her mouth with her own. Catching movement out of the corner of my eye, I look up to see Ray leaning against the doorjamb. Crossing his arms over his chest, he smiles at us. “I love watching you with her, Rach.”

  “Everything okay at work?” I ask, standing to my feet. Pressing a kiss to Alyssa’s forehead, I lie her back in her crib.

  “I wasn’t working.” Pushing off the wall, he steps toward me. “I went to see Tim. He won’t be bothering us anymore.”

  The breath lodges in my chest. “What do you mean?”

  “I couldn’t sleep.” Taking my hands, he pulls me out into the hallway and closes the door. I brace myself as he meets my eyes. “I asked Tim what it would take to make him go away.”

  “And Tim said?” I ask, searching his deep blues.

  Ray swallows hard, his jaw ticks, no doubt still angry about their conversation. “Twenty-five thousand dollars.”

  “What?” I hiss, slapping his hands away. My body is shaking with rage as I move down the stairs, heading straight for the kitchen. “That’s blackmail. We’re not giving him a damn dime, Ray. I mean it. I’m calling him right now and telling him to go straight to hell. I can’t even believe you entertained that kind of shit.”

  “I was so shocked that he could put a monetary value on the two of you that I snapped.” Grabbing my arm, he steps in front of me. “I told him he was an idiot for letting you slip through his fingers.” His hands run up my arms, pulling me close. “I told him how I’ll never make the same mistake. That I refuse to lose something so special.”

  “Ray…”

  “Something I said made him change his mind. He told me to leave,” he continues. “Then he said to send the paperwork and he’d sign away his rights to Alyssa.”

  “Oh God,” I reply, completely shocked. Walking over, I drop down into the kitchen chair that, only hours ago, Ray knocked across the room while fighting with Tim. “I’m so relieved.”

  “Like I said, Baby, he’s won’t be bothering us again.” Kneeling in front of me, Ray places his hands on my knees.

  “I can’t tell you how much this means to me,” I whisper
, overcome with emotion.

  “I know,” he replies, swiping a tear from my cheek with his thumb. “I don’t need the words, Rach. You’re everything to me. I’m not letting anyone stand in the way of that happiness. Especially not Tim.”

  Nodding in agreement, I take his face in my hands. “I don’t want to talk about him anymore, Ray,” I breathe, pressing my lips to his tenderly. “He’s out of our lives forever.”

  “Does this mean that I can take my girl back to bed and spend the morning showing her how much I love her?” he asks, leaning in closer.

  Smiling against his lips, I nod. “Please.”

  Chapter 21

  Three months later

  “We’re back!” Ray calls from the front door just as I unpack the last of the dishes from Ray’s condo.

  “In the kitchen, Babe!” I shout, tossing the brown packing paper into the empty box.

  About two weeks after the funeral, Ray and I sat down with Kate and made some decisions about Mom and Dad’s estate. With neither Kate or I wanting to sell the house we grew up in, and me being pulled between here and Ray’s, we made the decision that Ray would not renew the lease on his condo and he would move in here. Kate kept her room, while Ray and I moved down into my parent’s room, after the emotional task of moving all their things to the attic. My old room is now Alyssa’s nursery.

  Just as Ray promised Dad, construction has begun on all the projects he wanted done to the house. Including the basement mancave, which also has been modified to include a playroom space for Alyssa.

  Things are getting back to some sense of normal. After much encouragement from Zack and I, Kate is seeing a therapist. I have started teaching piano lessons and even work with the music teacher at the local elementary school, helping with student performances and the choir. My time working with the children is unbelievably rewarding and I have even been offered a more permanent position for the upcoming school year. The guys have adopted Dad’s Nerf War by instituting weekly fight nights. It is typical to find a gun by the door and a sticky note with the words ‘Game On’ scribbled on it.