Amethyst- Bow and Arrow

by M. D. Grimm

  "Well? What is your decision?" I asked.

  The uninjured soldier took a deep breath, turning his back on his comrade in a way I found to symbolize finality.

  "I accept." He knelt and pledged his loyalty.

  I nodded. "Good. Now go. Down that trail. You will soon see a gargoyle flying overhead. Follow him, and he will lead you to safety. Collect your family and return in a week's time. Gargoyles will then show you to your new home."

  He nodded before sheathing his sword. He never looked back at his comrade as he began jogging down the trail. Who could blame him? The desire to survive was instinctual, bred into us blood and bone. Death was not something anyone eagerly accepted.

  Even this injured soldier, who was now trying to stand on his own without the help of the mountain, wanted to live. He was convinced he could win, that he could gain honor and immortality by killing me.

  It wasn't logical. It wasn't possible. But the need to survive dictated he give himself false hope.

  I threw my head back and cried out, calling for the gargoyles, blatantly ignoring the injured soldier. Three gargoyles came. I commanded one to find the soldier and lead him out of Vorgoroth. He grunted in acknowledgement before flying away. I ordered the other two to keep an eye on the other group of soldiers, to make sure they all left.

  When I and the soldier were alone, I finally turned to him. His breathing was harsh and loud, and I realized the battle inside the cave sounded like it had moved deeper into the mountain. The sounds had become muffled.

  "So," I said softly. "What now?" Despite myself, I felt the soldier's pain. The desire to heal him was strong, but I never let my healer senses come to the surface. They simmered in my gut as my warrior side continued to have control over me.

  He was the enemy. He refused my offer of peace. He had to die.

  I unslung my bow and nocked and arrow. I lifted it. The soldier still had to use the mountain to stand.

  "You're a dialen," the soldier slurred. He was losing consciousness. I lowered my bow a fraction.

  "Yes."

  "The lover of the Dark Mage."

  I narrowed my eyes. "Yes."

  He spat at my feet.

  I shot him in the neck. He was dead before he hit the ground.

  Lowering my bow, I didn't feel satisfied. I didn't feel good or bad. It was just a waste. A waste of a life, a waste of an arrow. Just a fucking waste. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes for a moment, trying to steady myself. The noises from the cavern faded away just as the noise of the storm rumbled louder, vibrating in my chest. I was hitting my limit. I wasn't as resilient as Morgorth. Don't think for a moment that didn't burn me. I was the warrior, wasn't I? I was supposed to be the strong, never-ceasing dialen. But, Hunter's bow, I was only mortal. One dialen against a mage. It didn't bode well for me.

  If I didn't have so many to help me, I wouldn't have won.

  Just as that thought crossed my mind, a large explosion ripped the ground from underneath me, and a large blast of air flung me off my feet. I hit the ground and barely had time to register what had happened when another explosion lifted me in the air (again!) and slammed me into a tree. I slid to the ground. My bow had flown from my hand, and I lost many of my arrows. Dizzy and aching, I struggled to find which way was up and to gain my feet again.

  "Dialen!" bellowed the mage.

  Hunter's bow! He had survived. Had he killed all the boygles? I felt an irrational spear of anger pierce my gut. They might be horrid little monsters but, fucking underworld, they were my horrid little monsters. I had finally come to an understanding with them; I couldn't have them die now! The mountainside crumbled as I heard the mage stomp and shuffle his way out of the mess. On impulse, I touched my head, and panic gripped me as the piece of cloth was close to falling off my head.

  I hurriedly tied it back, shoving my hair underneath. I realized I was whimpering in fear and bit my tongue. Don't panic!

  I just managed to cover my hair once more when the mage stumbled out of the ruined cavern. Bloody, bitten, and enraged, with his clothes torn and mangled and one of his eyes swollen shut, the mage came toward me. I stood, my gut twisting like sea serpent in the ocean, and faced him, wondering what I should do now.

  He pointed a finger at me, his one good eye blazing with naked desire to see me dead.

  I didn't wait for him to speak. I ran once again. I knew my legs couldn't keep this up for long. That final blast through the air had wrenched my right leg, and my wrist was screaming at me. I ran around the base of the mountain, searching for a path -- one of the false paths Morgorth had created to lure invaders to their deaths.

  Sharp ice blades shot past my head, and one grazed my shoulder, drawing blood. Panic shot through me again as I clamped a hand on my wound, making sure the blood did not fall onto the ground. It wasn't just hair that the mage could use against me. My blood would be just as useful. I didn't have the calm mindset to heal it, but I couldn't keep running with my one arm lifted and gripping the other. This time, I couldn't stop the whimpers. I was at the edge of my limit, and it wouldn't be long before I fell down in pure exhaustion and defeat. But it was pride and love that kept me running, that kept me thinking. This was my home. I would not be defeated on it.

  Morgorth's face filled my thoughts as the amethyst pendant bumped against my chest. He needed me. I couldn't die. He needed me. By the Mother, I would survive for him!

  The ground exploded underneath me, and I tripped and fell. Panic clutched my heart, but I managed to turn the fall into a roll and came back on my feet. I pushed the torn material of my tunic against my wound, making sure the tunic soaked up the blood, preventing it from falling onto the ground. The pain spiked through my arm, but I could only ignore it.

  "Dialen!" the mage shouted. "Thou will die today! And so will thy villainous lover!"

  I bent my head and kept running.

  There! The path!

  The storm rumbled louder, vibrating my bones, and the wind picked up. Lightning struck again, closer this time. I swerved and managed to avoid a deadly looking green jet to the back. I jogged up the steps, tripping, sometimes slipping as the steps were covered with ice and scraping myself. My only salvation was that the mage was as exhausted as I was.

  "Nothing will save thee!" the mage panted. "Accept defeat!"

  Never. I couldn't speak, but my mind screamed my defiance. I would no longer be defeated. I would no longer lose. I had to win. I had to.

  Defend. Protect. Home.

  Morgorth.

  I would not die. I would not die. I would not...

  The words became a mantra in my head as I continued to climb, using hands as well as my legs up the steep, slick steps cut into the face of the mountain. The mage was no longer shooting spells at me; he had to conserve his strength for the climb. I didn't dare glance back. I was afraid I would lose my balance and perhaps fall. Or worse, falter enough for him to grab me and kill me.

  I honestly don't know how either of us kept climbing. The wind howled around us, icy rain falling in torrents, freezing my flesh. My fingers became stiff, the cloth around my hair soaked and slipping. But I couldn't pause to fix it. Lightning flashed again, so close I heard the crack of it. I gritted my teeth and continued my fight to survive.

  We continued to rise up past the treetops, high enough to see the walls of Geheimnis loom like a living thing in front of us. She seemed to frown down at the both of us, wondering what in the Mother's name we were doing. Her towering walls stood out starkly against the black sky, illuminating every time the lightning struck, like shards of glass. There were several sections of walls below the main towers of the castle, and it was to those I was heading toward. They were defensive walls, built primarily to make invaders think they were close to penetrating the fortress. In actuality, the fortress was even higher up, and there was no direct line up the mountain to it.

  I gasped in relief and felt slightly dizzy as I slapped a hand against the vine-covered walls. My other hand claspe
d the amethyst pendant around my neck. I laid my head against the cool stones and felt the vines quiver under my skin. They knew me. They slithered over my hands, caressing me, welcoming me home.

  "What did this accomplish, dialen?" The mage's voice was barely recognizable. He clasped his knees, more winded then I was. I hadn't fought a swarm of boygles. "Why dost thou fight what is inevitable?"

  Though grunting and groaning, I managed to stand and turned to face him. I leaned against the wall. "You wouldn't understand. This is my home."

  The mage straightened. He should be suffering blood loss right now, but I guessed that he'd staunched the bleeding with magick. He narrowed his eye at me. The climb deflated some of his rage. But I could still see the want for my death in his good eye.

  "Thou art formidable," he said. "Why wouldst thou pair with the dark beast? There are others more worthy of thy devotion."

  I smiled slightly and shook my head. I said once again, "You wouldn't understand."

  He seemed to consider that for a moment. Then he lifted his hand, winced at that simple action, and opened his mouth. I braced myself, took a deep breath.

  Many things happened at once. A jet of white fire came at my face. I ducked and rolled. The fire hit the stone and left a dent. The vines in fury disconnected from the walls, and shot toward the mage, lashing around his limbs, twining around his neck and wrists. He let out a strangled cry as the vines dragged him against the wall, slamming him against it, and continued to bind him like a spider does to a bug caught in its web.

  I crouched there, bloody, achy, tired... and satisfied. The thunder cracked and rumbled directly above us, momentarily deafening me. I was soaked to the bone, the coat dragging me down with uncomfortable weight.

  I watched the mage's final moments of life. The vines were poisonous. Their thorns punctured the mage's skin, injecting him with more poison than anything could survive. They continued to strangle him. It was over.

  He stared into my eyes. Until that very moment, I don't think he ever considered he might lose. I sighed.

  "Go to the Mother," I murmured. "May she welcome you to her bosom."

  He died. I knelt there for a long time, working up the strength to move, to do something. I felt satisfied, sure, but not joyous. I didn't want to celebrate. I wanted to take a nice long bath and go to bed. Maybe eat something.

  But most of all I wanted Morgorth. I just wanted to curl around him and sleep. I knelt there for a time, freezing and exhausted, my mind sluggish. How many more battles like this would my mate and I fight? I never fully comprehended until this moment the magnitude of the war I'd stepped into when I became Morgorth's mate. How could I? I'd been single-minded in my hunt for him, in my determination to stay by his side. Even now, though, I didn't think I'd made a mistake. But I had been horribly naïve.

  No wonder he had wanted me to become a strong warrior. To be his mate was to fight in a war for the rest of my life.

  I took a deep breath and managed to let out the cry to signal the gargoyles. They swooped down, slightly shaky as they fought the strong wind. One landed in front of me, and I climbed on his back.

  "Take me to Grekel."

  The alpha, it seemed, had not been lazy. I had been right that some of the soldiers who had sworn loyalty had been treacherous. Grekel and his pack had taken care of them. He had sated his thirst for blood (for now).

  Once I determined all the invaders were gone, I had the gargoyle fly me to the damaged part of the forest. The storm wasn't as strong down there, but I was shivering violently, and needed to get out of the wet clothes soon. I didn't have the strength to heal the trees, but I did manage to lessen the pain some of the trees felt. Most were dead. My heart felt heavy. I had the truls cut down the dead ones, and it seemed the trees around us were mourning. Their trunks and branches sagged, and their groaning grew louder.

  Such was the price of war. They knew it. I knew it. I didn't blame myself, but I did wish I could have taken care of the mage more quickly. But what happened could not be changed. What the Mother has written, let none of her children unwrite.

  No matter how sad, how monstrous or horrifying, we must all accept and move on.

  Some of the boygles had died. Most had lived. The cavern had collapsed, but Grendela had reacted in time and, with her own brand of magick, had created a bubble of protection for herself and most of her tribe. They were patching each other up and seemed delighted with the recent skirmish. Well, at least some of us had gotten pleasure out of it.

  "Take me to Geheimnis," I said to a gargoyle. I climbed on his back, and he flew me to the castle. I ate. I barely tasted the food. I took a bath. I wasn't soothed. I got into bed. It felt cold and empty.

  I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, hugging a pillow.

  Morgorth. Come home.

  Chapter Fifteen

  The storm had passed. It'd been a short one. I sat on a hill overlooking Happy Valley, and got little satisfaction in knowing they weren't affected by the invasion. I didn't think any of them even knew it had happened. A handful of children participated in a snowball fight as their pet wolves ran around, shoving some of them down. I could vaguely smell the warm, creamy scent of the bakery and the pungent, choking scent of the smithy. I was neither made hungry nor disgusted by the mixture of scents. My chin rested in my palms, and I had no desire to move, or to do anything, actually.

  The solid steps of paws met my ears a moment later, but I didn't shift my gaze. I knew his gait, his scent by now.

  Grekel sat beside me, panting lightly, watching the village as I did.

  I didn't sense his pack anywhere near us, and that puzzled me.

  "Anything to report?"

  "Nothing, Commander."

  I frowned. Then why was he here? I turned my head and stared at his profile. "And you interrupt my solitude, why?"

  Grekel lowered his body to the ground, placing his head between his front legs, his tail tucked under his rear. I've never seen him so calm, so complacent. His eyes half closed.

  "I interrupt nothing."

  I blinked. But he remained silent. What was going on? Confusion filled me, but after staring at him for a few solid moments, I finally realized what he was doing. He was keeping me company.

  By the Mother, he missed Morgorth as well. He was closer to my mate than any of the others in the pack. He was Morgorth's lieutenant. So that meant he wasn't just keeping me company he was having me keep him company.

  I would never have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes. I reached out and touched his head lightly. His ears, which had been tall and straight, twitching with every sound, lowered, relaxed. I stroked his furry head a few times, and his breathing became heavier. More contented. I shook my head. Then a question popped in my head.

  I asked softly, "How long have you known Lord Morgorth, Grekel?"

  "Since I was a puppy," he answered, his voice still crunching but oddly soft.

  I suddenly thought of the two puppies I'd helped rescue from the kellpy. They'd seemed to form a strange attachment to me. Did that attachment last into adulthood? Was Grekel actually loyal to Morgorth, despite his species' inclination to only follow the strongest? Was that why Grekel had led his pack to protect him from Dyrc?

  I doubted Morgorth realized any of this. He would never believe he could inspire loyalty, especially in a creature as instinctual as wichtln.

  "Grekel, those pups I helped save... You said they were Drussa's. But who's the father?"

  Grekel lifted his head and met my eyes. "I am."

  I felt my own eyes widen. Hunter's bow. His loyalty to me suddenly made more sense. I had not only earned his respect during battle, but he owed me a debt for saving his offspring. I'd seen wichtln with their young -- they were the most devoted parents I'd ever seen of any species. They doted on their young, sacrificing their lives to protect them.

  I swallowed hard and inclined my head to him. He nodded to me before settling back down. I rested my hand on his head as we sat
in companionable silence. I had misjudged the wichtln. I'd allowed prejudice to cloud what I could see of them. Sometimes even I couldn't see the truth. I should still be wary, careful around them. But in many ways, they were more honest and pure than many of the more "intelligent" species on Karishian. They didn't deceive or manipulate. They lived by a code, and if you knew that code they could be powerful allies.

  I stroked his head and found some comfort in his presence. I still ached with loneliness, but some of that was eased.

  ***

  Morgorth came home two days later. I didn't think I could have lasted any longer without him. I never wanted to be that long away from him ever again.

  I was sitting on the sofa, a book on my lap, but I hadn't read a word, could only stare at the fire. Then he came in. The doors banged open and I jumped to my feet, the book falling to the floor, forgotten. My heart rammed inside my chest in excitement, and it took all my strength to keep from throwing myself into his arms and taking him on the floor.

  He strode in, all swagger and confidence, a large grin on his face. He held up a pouch that I assumed held the stone. I could feel the slight pulse and presence of it in the air. But I didn't care about it. I just wanted him.

  "Sorry it took so long," Morgorth said, striding toward me. "The ludki are all about ceremony. They can never just give me the stones they find."

  I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. I was afraid I would simply gush all over him. Before I knew it, though, he had his arms around me and was squeezing me tightly. I gripped him back, burying my face in the crook of his neck. I took a deep breath, wanting to drown in him, craving him like I would water if I'd been stuck in the desert for days.

  "I missed you," he whispered.

  I nuzzled his neck. "Not as much as I missed you."

  "We will continue training tomorrow," Master Ulezander said. I jerked in surprise. I hadn't even seen him come in behind Morgorth. My eyes had only been for my mate.

  "Usual place?" Morgorth asked, still holding me.