Amethyst- Bow and Arrow

by M. D. Grimm

"Yes." He left.

  Morgorth finally pulled back. I didn't want him to. I didn't let him put too much distance between us. I was surprised Morgorth had hugged me in front of his master -- he usually resisted any intimate gestures in front of Uzzie. That meant he had missed me as painfully as I had him.

  "I have a surprise for you."

  I raised an eyebrow. "Do you?"

  I wondered when I should tell him about the invasion. He would find out soon; if not from me, then one of his minions, or if he happened to journey to the place that took the worst hit. And if he didn't hear it from me he would never forgive me; he'd think I was hiding it from him.

  "Morgorth, I have to tell you something..."

  My mate untied a small pouch from his belt and held it up. "Open it."

  I swallowed a sigh and took the pouch. I would tell him after I opened his present. I opened the bag and sucked in a breath. Inside the pouch were seeds. But they weren't just any seeds... They were Krane seeds. My bow was made from a Krane tree, and these trees had grown in the region where my tribe had lived. They were the trees I'd climbed on as a child -- tall, sturdy trees with black bark, which flowered with leaves of serene green and light purple flowers.

  My throat closed. The silence stretched, and then I realized he was waiting for me to say something. I cleared my throat and looked at him. It would seem I waited too long.

  He looked uncertain, rubbing the back of his neck. "Look... I just... Maybe it was stupid idea. But we traveled past the forest where your tribe lived, and... I thought it might be nice to have something of your tribe here. Something alive, you know? If you don't like them I can take them back. No problem. I didn't mean to bring up bad memories or anything--"

  "Stop, Morgorth," I said softly. I closed the bag and grabbed his hands, staring into his eyes. "I love it, Morgorth. Thank you. It was incredibly sweet of you. I would love to have these trees here, to look at them any time I wanted. Can we plant them right now?"

  Morgorth smiled. I saw the relief in his eyes and knew he really had been afraid of my reaction to the gesture. "Let me just put the stone with the rest, and then we'll go."

  I nodded. He turned away. "What stone was it, by the way?"

  "An amethyst. Amesulech."

  I fingered the small amethyst around my neck and knew I had to tell Morgorth soon. Today. But I had to admit I was a little afraid. He would be extremely angered by my actions. He would never hurt me, but... I hated having him angry with me. It made my stomach tie in knots.

  My fist tightened around the pouch of seeds. Perhaps Morgorth didn't truly understand the significance of this gift, but I did. He was making this my home. We were going to plant something that was mine, something that would grow and flourish.

  Before too long, he jogged down the steps and gripped my hand, pulling me toward the doors. He was as eager as I was. I grabbed my coat, which hung on a hook by the door. The boygles had managed to get all the blood out of it, and had stitched closed the different tears, and it had long since dried from its soaking from the storm. It was no worse for the wear as I tugged it on, following him outside.

  "Did you teleport here?" I asked as we walked onto the cliff landing in front of the front doors.

  "Yes, I did." The pride was evident in his voice. "From your tribe's forest to this landing. I don't know why it took me so long to get the hang of it."

  I smiled, but it vanished when he pulled up short. I bumped into him and looked in the direction he was staring at. I cringed. The trees we'd removed made a noticeable hole along the edge of the river. A hole that Morgorth would notice, of course, since he knew his forest like he knew magick.

  "What..." he whispered. Then he gripped my hand tighter and murmured a word. We were speeding through the air before I had time to brace myself. He always created a protective pocket of air around us when he used this piece of magick. The speed alone could snap my neck, and the pressure would make it impossible for me to breathe. It took three heartbeats to reach the location of the hole, and he let me go when we hit the ground. I stumbled but kept standing.

  Morgorth stared, his mouth open. "What happened to my forest?"

  I heard the anger rise in his voice. I watched his eyes begin to glow, his hands clenching into fists. I swallowed hard.

  "Morgorth--"

  "What the fuck happened to my home!" He whirled on me, and I instinctually took a step back.

  "Morgorth, listen. There was a mage and--"

  "A mage?" he bellowed. "What the fuck was a mage doing here? And why the fuck didn't you send a querian to me? Why were you hiding this?"

  "I wasn't!" Panic made my heart throb and my gut twist. "I'm not hiding anything, Morgorth, I swear. I was going to tell you the moment you got back--"

  "Why was a mage here?" he demanded. Flames began to spark at his fists.

  "I'll tell you everything if you would just calm down and listen! I can explain--"

  "Then explain!"

  I panted, and sweat began to form at the base of my spine. "There was an invasion, the same day you left. A mage from the Cwaylin kingdom to the north came with a small unit of soldiers and--"

  "You went up against a mage?" His voice had suddenly lowered, had turned dark. His eyes flashed, amber glowed. I forced my mouth to move even though it wanted to freeze shut.

  "Yes, but--"

  "A mage?" he shouted. Again. I flinched. "Hunter's bow! I should lock you up permanently in Geheimnis. I know that mage, Aishe. How could you be so idiotic? He's a mage of King Serpen and a Level four mage. Do you have a death wish? Do you know what could have happened to you?"

  "Just let me talk--"

  Morgorth bared his teeth, and suddenly looked at the ground as if looking for something. Then he bent and picked up something. At first I couldn't see what it was. Then I saw it was one of my long white hairs. I touched my head impulsively. Morgorth met my eyes, and what I saw there made my blood run cold. His pupils had become so large they diminished the amber, and they seemed to glow with a light I had never seen before.

  He closed his fist over my hair and then, without moving his lips, I knew he said a word of magick because my arms and legs suddenly snapped together, bound by unseen bindings. It was like I had turned into a statue with no ability to move. I gasped as I was forced by unseen hands to my knees. My limbs wouldn't obey my commands. I couldn't talk; my tongue seemed to be bound as well. I trembled in sheer fear of having no control over my body.

  I couldn't even move my eyes.

  Morgorth suddenly knelt in front of me. Again, the unseen hands moved my head, lifting it up so I could meet his eyes. I felt like a puppet and prayed this demonstration would end soon. I knew my eyes were wide and probably filled with terror. I couldn't fight it, not this time.

  He stared at me, his gaze hard, but not cold. "A mere apprentice could do as much with one hair." He held the strand up in front of my face. "A master could do far worse. He could explode your heart from your chest. Twist your intestines into knots. Make you eat your own flesh, and you wouldn't be able to do anything to protect yourself. "

  Then the look was gone from his eyes. He dropped my hair, releasing the spell. My limbs were under my control again. I gasped in air, my face burning from my tears. Morgorth leaned back on his heels and murmured a word. He snapped his fingers and set the strand of hair on fire, destroying it.

  We were silent. I was too shocked to speak. He'd never used his magick on me like that before. He'd always told me what mages could do with just one hair, but until I'd actually had it done to me... I shuddered to think what that mage would have done.

  I looked at Morgorth's face. His eyes no longer glowed, and there wasn't fire on his hands anymore. His anger seemed to have diminished some. He looked miserable, his face paler than usual, the lines of his face deeper. Maybe now he would listen.

  "I understand," I whispered. "I took precautions against what you just did. I remember what Kayl did to you, with that one hair. I wasn't foolish, Morgorth.
Just let me explain what I did, yes?"

  He nodded.

  I told him about the war paint, the cloth tied around my hair. I told him about wearing the enchanted clothing he'd made me, the use of his minions. When I got to the part with the deal I'd made with the soldiers, Morgorth glared.

  I held up a hand. "Hold on, let me explain my reasons." I did. I could see Morgorth understood the logic in my decision, and he gave me a grudging nod. As I explained to him my strategy during the battle, I couldn't forget what Morgorth had said a master mage could do. And while he might never admit it, he was a master -- he could do a whole lot of nasty things with just one hair. I suppressed a shudder.

  I finished with what I did to the trees and how I managed to heal some. Silence fell again, both of us lost in our thoughts for a time.

  "Well," Morgorth said, breaking the silence. "I guess you weren't completely reckless."

  I managed a small smile.

  He took a deep breath. "But why, Aishe? Why didn't you send a querian to me? Why did you have to take the mage on by yourself?"

  I could see the fear in his eyes, the need for an answer. He deserved an answer, even if I didn't want to give it. I had made my choice and now I had to stand behind it and face the consequences.

  "Well, I'm ashamed to admit it, but I've felt... less like a warrior since meeting you."

  He blinked. "What?"

  "I'm a warrior. I've been trained as one. I've never doubted my skills before, not since I completed my training and grew into adulthood. But I've doubted them since meeting you. You've saved my life countless times."

  Morgorth looked confused, and slightly hurt.

  "Don't misunderstand me." I touched his hand. "I'm grateful, believe me. But I'm not used to someone saving me. Since we've met, we've gone up against some powerful creatures. And I've come to understand a lot about magick, and have a healthy respect for it. And if it hadn't been for you -- I'd be dead. So, with this invasion, I just... I just had to prove to myself that I could defend my home, that I could succeed without you, that I could protect what I love -- and that I wouldn't fail again."

  I couldn't put into words, though, how those times he had to save my life had wounded my pride. Those times had made me feel like the awkward child I'd been before my training, before him. That he'd saved my life countless times when he'd stayed with my tribe. I couldn't go back to being that little boy anymore. I had to know, was I the warrior I thought I was? I couldn't doubt myself, not again. And I didn't anymore.

  Morgorth nodded slowly, staring at my face. "I think I understand. But -- don't ever do that again, okay? Please? You've never had to prove anything to me. Never. Not once. I've never seen you as anything other than a fierce, capable warrior."

  I nodded. His words compounded my shame. But I couldn't regret my actions. I had proven to myself that I could defend my home. I wasn't less of a warrior for having a mage as mate, for having him constantly save my life. Considering what I'd been up against... I wouldn't have survived on my own. Also, though it was entirely foolish, I felt like I had to prove to him that I had become the warrior he wanted me to be. It was foolish because he didn't know he'd told me that yet. He didn't know our past, but I did. And now I had my confirmation. He knew I was a warrior, he'd never doubted my skill. But I couldn't even tell him how much his words meant to me.

  Morgorth spoke suddenly. "Oh, Aishe..." He stood. So did I.

  "What?"

  "I could have lost you." He turned away, looking at the trees. "What do you think I would have done then?"

  I swallowed hard. "You would have sought revenge."

  He turned his head, and I saw his profile. A bitter smile touched his mouth. "Not just that, Aishe. I wouldn't have stopped there. I would have sought destruction. The annihilation of everything on this fucking world."

  "Morgorth--"

  "I've told you, Aishe," his tone became hard again, "if you die, I will destroy everything. I will break this world, shatter it into pieces. I will embrace the darkness inside me, happily. I will fall into the Mage's Fury and become the monster destiny says I will."

  "You could fight it," I insisted. "You have others you care about. Uzzie, Elissya, Enfernlo. They're your friends. Happy Valley, the creatures of this forest. You don't have to--"

  "No." He turned fully toward me and stared into my eyes. "Don't you get it, Aishe? Don't you get what you are to me?"

  I looked away.

  "You're my heart," Morgorth whispered. I looked at him; he looked at the ground. "You die, my heart dies. And so does any desire to live or to let anything else live. That's the way things are, Aishe. Nothing will change that." He stared hard into my eyes once more. "So if you want the world to continue to turn, you had better guard yourself. Don't be foolish; don't be reckless with your life. The world can't afford it."

  My insides trembled. He was dead serious. He was telling me the truth... no, fact. He was telling me a fact. And I believed him. He'd told me as much before, but only now did I truly understand the depth of his conviction. The depth of his connection to me, his devotion. It humbled me just as it terrified me. Weight settled on my shoulders, an invisible, stiffening weight that I knew would never leave me. He'd given me that weight, but I couldn't be angry at him for it.

  Walking to him, I gripped him close. He snapped his arms around me, and I could feel him tremble. I closed my eyes.

  "I only feel real fear when I think of you in danger," Morgorth whispered, his breath fanning my cheek. "I feel terror and horror, Aishe. Don't put me through that again." He squeezed me.

  I pulled back enough to look at his face. "And what do you think I feel? I feel terror and horror at the thought of you in danger. I'm helpless against mages, I know that. I can't help you when you fight them. I'm just a liability."

  Pain entered Morgorth's eyes. "You've never been a liability. Not to me. You're my weakness, sure. But you're also my strength."

  I swallowed hard. I knew it wasn't easy for him to bare his soul. But the fact that he was doing it, now, touched me deeply.

  "I understand. I've proven to myself that I am still the same warrior as I was before my tribe died. I can protect my home just as well as you can. There is nothing more to prove. I won't do that again, you have my word."

  Morgorth took a deep breath and nodded. "Good. I will hold you to that."

  "Feel free to." I kissed his cheek. "I love you."

  The thunder of snapping branches jerked us apart just as something black fell to the ground with a bone-cracking thud. Morgorth moved before I did, and as we approached the black thing, I could see it was a bird.

  A fasion.

  Dread clutched my guts just as Morgorth knelt down. His thoughts seemed to run the same way mine had. "It's not Lansa."

  I exhaled in relief.

  "Spy! Spy!" squawked Lansa as he dove between the branches. I lifted my arm automatically, and he settled on it, twitching and folding his wings behind his back. Morgorth stood and raised an eyebrow. I then realized he might find it strange that Lansa came to me so easily. I shrugged, giving him an easy grin.

  He rolled his eyes before staring hard at Lansa.

  "Spy? Explain."

  Lansa jerked his body toward the dead fasion on the ground. "Spy! Alerts north kingdom. Cause of invasion. Invasion."

  I knew there had to be a spy. "I found it odd that the army knew when you left that day. They seemed to think it a perfect time to invade." I looked at Lansa. "Good boy, you did so well."

  Lansa made a strange sound of pleasure. I rubbed his head. Morgorth lifted his arm, and Lansa obediently hopped onto it. He stroked Lansa's head a few times as well.

  "You alerted your commander about the invasion, didn't you?"

  "Yes, Lord!"

  Morgorth smiled slightly. I saw the affection in his eyes for the bird. He whispered, "Good boy."

  We planted the seeds. Morgorth used magick to break the earth, and crystals to protect the seeds until spring came. I relished th
e dirt on my hands, on my leggings. The muscles that were still tense from the battle days before began to finally loosen as I took comfort from this simple task. My mate knelt beside me, his shoulder frequently bumping mine. We spaced the seeds out, making sure the large trees would have room to grow. I was reminded once again that everything had a reason for happening. Without the death of those trees during the invasion, there wouldn't have been sufficient room for the new ones.

  "The mage was sanctioned by his king to invade," Morgorth suddenly spoke as he placed a seed into the ground.

  I blinked and looked at him. "Yes."

  He met my eyes. "You know what that means."

  I nodded. "He was also Council sanctioned. They tried to pull you into another war."

  Morgorth's eyes darkened. He gave a curt nod. His touch was gentle as he set a crystal beside the seed, murmuring a word to activate it. But his movements were jerky and harsh as he packed the dirt over the seed.

  I couldn't imagine having my own kind, my tribe, plot to destroy me. I couldn't fathom it, and I counted myself lucky I couldn't.

  "So," I spoke into the silence, "is not this my home, now?"

  Morgorth sighed beside me. "Yes, of course it is. It always has been."

  I eyed him. "You need to trust me."

  Morgorth frowned, staring at the mound of dirt under his hands. "I do trust you. I'm just... dammit! I'm just scared." He turned to me, met my eyes. "This is me scared. I can't lose you."

  "So you have told me."

  "I'll keep telling you."

  "I'm not reckless, my love. You have to trust me. To trust me not to search out trouble, but you also have to trust me to meet it should it come. And win."

  "I will try." Morgorth lightly took my hand, as if giving me the option to pull away. Didn't he understand I would never pull away? I gripped his hand. "You're closer to me than anyone I know."

  We knelt in silence, hand-in-hand for a long, peaceful moment. Then he spoke, "I know powerful creatures."

  "Yes."

  "You're not weak. I've never considered you weak. But... you are less able to defend yourself against those powerful creatures."

  I nodded. "I know. I'll let you handle them. But if it comes down to it, I will fight. I'm a warrior. I can't stop being that any more than you can stop being a mage. It's who I am."