I Belong to Him

by Ava Danielle

  Michael purrs into my ear, it’s something that usually turned me on, but tonight, it’s the thought of Brandon that is turning me on. I want him and I’m letting my husband touch me in places that only he should. I’m wishing it were Brandon though. I close my eyes and let ‘Brandon’ kiss me hard, his tongue sliding into my mouth, his breathing hitching with mine, his fingers sliding into my pussy. I feel his finger slide up my clit and rub me gently, hitting that spot that makes my heartbeat go faster. “I want you, baby,” Only those words aren’t Michael’s, they are Brandon’s. “I want you, too” I mumble, I can’t make out if it’s my mind or my actual voice saying those words. I’m enjoying ‘Brandon’s’ fingers. I feel Michael slide his cock into me. It all happened so fast and as he cums, I feel left wanting more. I’m glad he got off me, as I wish there was more. I faked yet another orgasm.

  Chapter 6

  The next morning, I decide to make Michael a perfect breakfast. I whip up some scrambled eggs, some bacon, and toast. After his cup of coffee is finished, I place the cup and plate on the serving tray and bring it up to the bedroom to surprise Michael with breakfast in bed.

  Once I made it into the bedroom, he jumps out of bed, and rushes beside me. “I brought some breakfast for you,” I say with a big smile on my face. Michael, turns around, “Oh, I don’t have time,” and continues walking toward the bathroom. I’m left standing. I stare at the tray in my hand and leave the bedroom. I’m not entirely sure what just happened.

  Downstairs, I set the tray on the kitchen counter and stared at it for a minute. Michael came downstairs, dressed, a lot of mousse in his brown hair, he’s wearing an old sweater and old ripped up jeans, his figure is exceptional, but it always has been. That man can eat and never gain a pound.

  “Breakfast is cold now,” I mention to him as he pours himself another cup of coffee from the coffeemaker. “That’s ok, I didn’t want any,” he states as he takes his cup and walks out into the garage, leaving me standing. I follow him out to the garage. “Hey Michael, would you like to do something together today?” and await his answer as he’s digging through toolboxes. “Actually, I don’t have time Addison. Sorry,” looks up at me for a minute and shrugs his shoulders. I’m not sure if saying anything would change his mind, so I walk back into the house. There’s no point in trying to change his mind. Michael usually does what Michael wants to do.

  My mind wanders back to Brandon. I debate on texting him or even calling him. But instead, I call my best friend Kristina, and vent to her.

  Hey Goober

  Hey Kris. What are you doing?

  Not much. How was your night?

  You don’t need to ask. Michael, well you saw how drunk he was.

  That means you got some.

  Ha. Yeah, I got some. I made him breakfast this morning, he brushed me off. As usual.

  Bad mood?

  I guess! I don’t really care anymore, you know?

  That’s because of Brandon.

  You think?

  I know, Addi. Have you thought any more about it?

  I have. Kinda. A little. Ok. Fine. A lot.

  And?

  It’s just thinking.

  I’m here for you Addi.

  I know, thanks! Wanna go do something? The girls are probably hanging with their friends.

  I have a few things to do around the house. How about you come over?

  Sounds good.

  Love ya dork!

  Girl time. Just what I needed.

  Chapter 7

  The next day, I woke up to find Michael already up and out of bed. I lay here staring at the ceiling as I’ve done so many times and actually get excited about the upcoming days. The night before, with Brandon on my mind, has left me wet. I can’t quite remember every detail of my dream, but he was in it, and he wasn’t very innocent at all. I’ve decided I will just go with what comes my way. It doesn’t hurt to think about my happiness. I jump up and out of bed ready to get Sunday over with. I dig in my closet for a pair of shorts and warm sweater. My flip-flops on as I make my way downstairs. The girls have already prepared breakfast and my coffee is ready in a cup. These girls are something else. “You’re in a good mood, Mom” Violet says as I sip my coffee. I just smile back at her and notice Michael throwing me a wink. I’m assuming he thinks it’s because of him, he couldn’t be more wrong. Today is the day I start thinking about ME. After breakfast, the girls and I head down to main street and check out some of the stores. I’m considering a new outfit for my date tomorrow. The girls are getting too much excitement out of dressing me up after I mention to them I needed some new clothes. Unfortunately, a fourteen and thirteen year old aren’t up-to-date on mom wardrobe. A decide on a pretty sundress with a new pair of open toe sandals. As we continue down Main street to a nearby ice cream parlor, my phone dings. I send the girls in to get their ice cream as I retrieve my phone and notice a text from Brandon. Excitedly I open it and read

  I hope you’re enjoying this beautiful Sunday. I look forward to our “date” tomorrow.

  I totally forgot about the text I sent him. I was a bit tipsy and I’m not sure if that’s something I should’ve texted him in the first place. It’s not like we know each other.

  I apologize for my text yesterday, the wine overtook me and I tend to drunk text. You were the lucky one,

  It’s usually Kristina that gets them ;)

  Ready to put my phone back up, it dings again. That was quick.

  I like being the lucky one. Feel free to text me drunk any day ;)

  Oh my goodness this man. I put my phone back into my purse when Cheyenne looks up at me with ice cream in one hand, “Why you smiling like that Mom?” Oh crap. I need to work on that. “No special reason, just having a great day with you girls.” We continue walking down main street saying hi to some of the locals we know and stop in front of my store. “I can’t believe we are pretty close to opening. The other day we ordered furniture that will be delivered this week and the books are in storage waiting for us to put them on the shelves,” I tell the girls. I point out the corners where the love seats will go, what we had decided to start out the window decorations with. “Don’t forget a smut corner, mom, we know how much you like reading those.” I blush as Violet points that out. Leave it to my oldest to make sure the world knows what I read. It’s starting to cool off some and we decide to head home, eat leftovers and plop in front of a movie. The girls picked it out and as long as it’s something beside Frozen, I’m down with anything. Michael cuddles up next to me on the couch as my mind wanders to Brandon. 10pm and I’m ready for bed, that’s the earliest in a long time, all because I want to get today over with. I’m overly excited about my coffee date tomorrow. I make sure I’m on my side of the bed, like I do every night, and close my eyes dreaming. I don’t mind that Michael has his back turned to me, I don’t mind his snoring, I don’t mind any of it. I’m just ready to get to sleep.

  YES, finally the next morning. I’m not really sure how quickly I got those girls ready to go to school. I packed their lunches and push them out the door. I ran upstairs where Michael was still lying in bed and hopped in the shower. I’m usually not in the shower until everyone has gone off to school and work, but today I just wanted to take my time and make sure I don’t smell half bad. It wouldn’t be a nice impression to go on a date smelling like cow poop. I turn the showered on, water hot as all get out, and climb in. I feel the hot water run down my body soothing me. I imagine what it would be like if “he” was in the shower with me. I start to rub my body down with lavender soap, making sure I get a little bit extra over my neck and nipples. I’m not really sure why that makes a difference, but I do it anyway. I use strawberry shampoo for my hair and make sure it smells of it. I shave my legs and pubic hair. I needed a good trim, it’s been forever. Not like my husband cares if I’m clean shaven or not, he doesn’t touch me unless he’s drunk lately. I finish in the shower, get out and dry myself off.

  A knock on the door catches my atten
tion, “Can I come in and brush my teeth?” he says. Well duh, it’s not like he has never seen me naked, “Uh, of course, not like you’ve never seen me naked,” I say flirtatious. He didn’t seem to get what I meant by it and started brushing his teeth. Well that’s my cue, no morning sex for me. He wipes his mouth and disappears out of the bathroom again. I stare at the mirror and you know what, that won’t kill my mood. I put on my new sundress and start to brush my hair. I hear a faint “goodbye” from Michael as he heads to work. After drying and curling my hair, one last look in the mirror and I’m ready to go. A big smile plastered on my face, I’m actually ready to do this. I head downstairs, turn the radio up, and dance around, I probably shouldn’t, but I’m holding on to this adrenalin. I see my phone light up and grab it off the counter, a text from Brandon.

  Let’s meet up in an hour at Tisane Tea in Hartford, sound good?

  So glad he suggested something that is further out, less likely a chance to run into anyone we know, especially Michael or anyone else from the schools here in Middletown. I answer quickly

  Sounds perfect, I’ll see you there!

  I start to get my things together. Throw a jean jacket over my dress, grab my keys and head out the door. Trying to get into my car, the neighbor Mrs. Leslie looks up and starts talking about the weather. Really Mrs. Leslie, now is not the day to tell me how flipping awesome it is that the sun is shining. I nod my head at her, smile that courteous smile, wave and explain to her I have to leave. I get into my car, start the engine, when the radio starts playing Animals by Maroon 5. Really radio? Trying to tell me something here? I crank it up and just go with it. The drive on the interstate is pretty easy this morning. I’m going over everything in my head not sure as to what to expect when I get there. A lot of questions are running through my head but the biggest fear is, that I’m going to enjoy myself way too much and not be able to handle this without wanting more.

  I arrive at Tisane and see I’m early. Right as I’m debating on going in or not, he pulls up next to me. I get out of my car, and grab my purse, as he walks up to me. He holds my door open for me, and hands me his hand to help me out. The smallest gesture from him excites me. We walk up to the front door and he holds that open for me as well. His mama sure raised this man right. We take a right and head down to the corner booth. We sit down, each of us on one side of the booth and start looking at each other. He just smiles and I’m starting to feel just a bit uncomfortable wondering if this was such a good idea after all. Before I could say anything, the waitress comes to take our order. I know Brandon is very good looking, but I don’t think she’s realized I’m here as well. While I’m giving my order she’s concentrating on Brandon. I clear my throat and ask for her to get me some poop and she smiles and agrees. Um, excuse me lady? Brandon starts to laugh and the waitress looks around confused. I clear my throat again and start from the beginning, “Clearly you didn’t hear me as I ordered a cup of earl grey tea or even poop. If you can’t do your job right maybe I should consider calling the manager right now and have him find you a new job.” Her eyes get very big as she apologizes. My goodness, what is it with these young girls thinking that just because a handsome man walks in, the females they are with, should be ignored. “Well that was interesting. Are you always like this?” Brandon asks me still laughing. I’m not so much amused.

  We make small talk, talk about our kids and our futures with them. He even tells me a little about his wife leaving him. She seriously packed up with one of his co-workers that she met and moved to the Bahamas. That is just crazy. After we drink and eat some muffins, things take a more serious turn. “I’m really glad you agreed to meet me today, I was actually starting to go crazy just thinking about you and not being able to see you,” he says to me just staring right at me. I’m a bit flabbergasted and unsure how to answer his statement. “I’m sorry if this makes you feel uncomfortable, or if I’m overstepping my boundaries, but I really can’t help how I feel. I know and understand you’re married and I’m not trying to come between you and your husband, but if I don’t say the things that are on my mind, I might just lose my shit.” I just smile at his last sentence. “I do have to confess, that you’ve been on my mind as well,” desperate for him to know, I put it out there.

  He reaches over the table and lightly brushes his fingers against mine. His touch ignites me, it makes me feel things I have never felt before. My body wants more. I give him a small smile and he gives my hand a tight squeeze. I’m taken by him. We sit for a few minutes waiting for the waitress to give us the check, I can tell he’s having a hard time letting go of my hand and to be honest, I do not really want to let go as well. After we pay, he helps me out of the booth, holds my hand and doesn’t let go. What does this mean? And most importantly, what have I gotten myself into? We get to our cars, I lean against mine, Brandon leaning into me. He stares straight into my eyes. Oh my god, is this the moment he kisses me? No, surely not. He knows I’m married. I shouldn’t be doing this. I look down to the ground, his finger lifting my chin up, “Let me see your beautiful eyes.” Looking back at him, he slowly eases his lips closer to mine and brushes them lightly. I swear, I not only see fireworks, I feel them. His teeth are grinding along my lips, he’s breathing into my mouth.

  My breath hitches when he let go. He’s still looking at me, a small little smirk leaving his lips, and I’m left wanting more. Begging for more. There’s this undeniable chemistry. He’s gotten under my skin, deep under my skin. “I want to see you again, Addison. There’s this connection between us, I’m having a hard time letting you go.” I look down at the keys in my hands “I want to, too, so badly, but I don’t know if I can. I feel this obligation toward my husband, this isn’t right.” I turn around, get into my car, slam the door, start the engine, and drive off leaving him standing there. Smooth move, Addison. But what I’m supposed to do? That kiss. I haven’t been kissed like that in forever, it felt wonderful, great, ecstatic, mind blowing, and so many more words, but just because it felt good, doesn’t mean it’s good.

  The drive home is horrible. I feel drawn to him. There’s this undeniable connection between us, extremely silly, but maybe he’s my soul mate? Bullshit! Michael is. Michael is my forever. Michael and I have children together, a future together. That’s all there is to it. This thing, if you can even call it that, is just a derail on the tracks. I need to find my way back on the right track and go, not looking back. This was a mistake. But dammit, a mistake that felt so fucking good. I’m craving him and I’m not sure how to stop this addiction. The past week I’ve done nothing but think about him. I’ve wanted him, fuck; I’ve even envisioned him during sex with my own husband. How’s that supposed to fit into this equation of marriage?

  Finally at home, I see Kristina sitting on our front porch. “Hey hooker,” she says just a tad pissed off. “Where have you been?” I’m not even sure how to answer that, I sit down on my front step, take a deep breath, “I’m not even sure.” She looks at me skeptically, “Care to elaborate?” Oh my. Where to begin? I give her a few details and sit in silence. “Well, honey, what’s your heart tell you?” she asks me. Fuck. My heart doesn’t really know how to feel about all this. My hearts wants so much more than my husband gives me, but it can’t handle a divorce, I can’t put my kids through all that. Is this attraction worth dropping everything good that I do have in my life? “Addison, you’re not the first woman to leave her husband! You’re not the first to have a split up family, not the first that has kids to worry about and not the first to ever think about herself. What do you want? How do you feel about him? And really, who’s to say that you’d want to spend time with him? I mean really, what if he sucks in bed?” Leave it to Kristina to point that out.

  I laugh at her, in a way I guess she has a point, but am I capable of cheating on my husband to figure out what I want? We both enjoy the sun just a little more when our children show up from school. I guess it’s time to do the mommy duties and try to escape the thought of Brandon Dona
von.

  Chapter 8

  It’s been a few weeks since the date with Brandon. I’ve had some time to process all this, and come to the conclusion I might want to see where this goes. Things with Michael haven’t really gotten any better, pretty much at a standstill. Kristina and I have our grand opening of our little shop. The hardest part of that was trying to come up with a name. I never realized that naming a store could be harder than picking out the right furniture and coffee brand. But we managed, and decided to go with the name, Clutzoid Chapters & Coffee. A fancy little logo and bam it’s ours. The name holds a dear meaning to both of us. In addition, the name really holds true to the both of us. As we both stand in front of our little shop¸ ready for our grand opening, I pull out my phone from my back pocket and decide to text Brandon. I do kind of feel bad for hauling ass away from him, but maybe he’ll understand. If not, well then I guess I’ll know where things stand and I can move forward. A simple little “I MISS YOU” and I put my phone away again. I’m not really sure what possessed me to type that but that is truly how I feel. It’s not easy to go day in and day out and not think about him. I’ve tried, but I’m done trying. I go back inside our shop to blow up the rest of the balloons that we are assembling out front for the opening, when my phone buzzes. I pull it back out of my pocket and notice it’s from Brandon. I’m actually a bit nervous and hesitant reading it. I unlock my phone, close my eyes, take a deep breath and read,