That seemed to make Ivy feel better, even as Esther felt worse. “Good. We want our privacy.”
Cathy honked at precisely nine thirty. With Winnie in one arm, Esther grabbed the car seat with her other hand and headed for the car. Without being asked, Ivy carried the kievel, the diaper bag, out to the car. Even though it was self-serving on Ivy’s part, it was still nice not to have to make a second trip back to the house. Of course, Esther had no illusions that Ivy was learning to be more thoughtful. Ivy just wanted to get rid of Esther as quickly as possible.
Esther buckled Winnie into her seat and climbed into the car. She turned to wave, but Ivy had already disappeared into the house, obviously beside herself with worry that the breakfast casserole would be dry.
On the way to pickleball, Cathy gave Esther an update on her earwax and her gout. Esther didn’t even know what gout was, but it sounded unpleasant. Esther did her best to muster sympathy for Cathy’s ailments, but all she could muster was a healthy dose of self-pity. Not even the prospect of slamming a pickleball over the net could cheer her up today.
Nanna and Hannah were already on the court, hitting the ball in their Plain dresses with sweatpants underneath. Esther still couldn’t get over the sight of Amish women playing pickleball, even though she was one of them. Rita and Allison pulled up right behind Esther and Cathy. Esther unloaded Winnie from the car while Cathy put sweatbands on her wrists and one on her head just above her ears. Cathy seemed to have numerous health problems, but she was very serious about her pickleball. Of all of them, she was the best player, even better than Esther, who was fifty years younger.
Hannah and Cathy teamed up to play against Rita and Allison while Nanna and Esther sat on a blanket outside the fence and played with Winnie. Now that Winnie could crawl, she wasn’t inclined to stay on the blanket, and Esther had to keep chasing her and bringing her back.
Nanna smoothed her finger down Winnie’s cheek, then wrapped her arms around her knees. She looked at Esther, her eyes dancing with delight. “It’s none of my business, but you know I don’t usually care if something is my business or not. Please tell me, what is going on with Levi? This morning he was so excited and happy about something, he offered to help me organize my sewing room.” She nudged Esther with her shoulder. “I’m guessing you have something to do with his good mood.”
Esther grabbed a handful of Winnie’s cereal puffs and started tossing them at the chain-link fence. “Why would you think I have something to do with his mood? We’re just friends.” Ach. She was going to choke if she had to say that one more time.
Nanna studied Esther’s face. “Something is wrong.”
Esther had to look away from those piercing blue eyes. They were so much like Levi’s. “Jah.”
“Oy, anyhow. I think you’d better tell me all about it.”
Esther threw another cereal puff. Harder this time. “It’s not my story to tell.”
Nanna raised her eyebrows. “Of course it’s your story to tell. Things that touch your life, one way or the other, are always part of your story.”
Esther threw another cereal puff. It plinked off the chain-link fence and hit Winnie in the cheek. Winnie didn’t seem to feel it. She picked the puff off the ground and stuffed it into her mouth. Okay. No more throwing cereal puffs. Esther would put out somebody’s eye, for sure and certain. “Levi is going to propose to Ivy this morning.”
Whatever Nanna had been expecting, that wasn’t it. Her mouth fell open like a largemouth bass. Esther probably could have counted all of Nanna’s teeth. She was missing one in the back. “Are you sure?”
Esther pulled up some grass at her fingertips. “Yesterday he told Ivy he had something to ask her. She’s home preparing a special brunch for his proposal.”
Deep lines etched themselves around Nanna’s mouth. “I have a very hard time believing that. Ivy doesn’t know how to boil water. She wouldn’t know the first thing about making brunch.”
Esther couldn’t keep a half smile from her face. Nanna knew Ivy too well. “I made most everything, but she’s got to take the breakfast casserole out of the oven, and she felt fairly confident mixing the orange juice.”
“She’s going to overbake it.”
“I know.”
Nanna sat on her haunches and pinned Esther with a grim expression. “Why in the world would Levi propose to your sister?”
Esther sighed and ripped up more grass from the lawn. “Ivy is pretty, and she can be very charming, and she isn’t old like me.”
Nanna grunted her disapproval. “So Ivy only has two gute qualities . . .”
“I mentioned three.”
“Two. Being younger than you is neither here nor there. And you think those two gute qualities would ever in a million years induce my grandson to marry her?” Nanna folded her arms across her chest. “You can just put that thought out of your mind.”
Esther shook her head. “But Ivy can be very persuasive, and men are unpredictable and irrational and so easily manipulated.”
Nanna sniffed. “That sounds like your last fiancé, Mahlon.”
“Menno.”
“Menno. What a misfortune you ever got engaged to that one. But that does not sound like my Levi or any of my grandsons. Menno does not represent most men, and you know it.”
Esther pulled up more grass. “I’m not sure of anything anymore.”
Nanna grew more animated with every word. “Levi is a gute boy and smart. He would not fall in love with Ivy. He just wouldn’t.”
“But how can you be sure?”
“Because I know Levi. And I thought you did too.”
Esther pulled Winnie back to the blanket and handed her another cereal puff. “He and Ivy have so much fun together. He likes her.”
Nanna narrowed her eyes. “Didn’t you ask him to be nice to her?”
“Jah, but there’s a difference between being nice and falling in love.”
“I agree, but I think you’re wrong about Levi, and I’ll try not to be offended that you think my grandson would be so foolish as to fall in love with your sister.” She said it with a smile, so Esther knew she wasn’t really offended. “I know where Levi’s heart is, and Ivy Zook doesn’t have a single piece of it.” She reached out and squeezed Esther’s hand. “You’ll see. All Ivy will get from brunch is over-baked breakfast casserole and profound disappointment. Levi would sooner eat his own hat than marry Ivy.”
Esther wished, hoped, prayed that was true. Whatever happened, she’d know in a few hours. She’d hold Nanna’s words in her heart and try to enjoy pickleball. As long as Cathy didn’t accidentally whack her with the paddle, it might even be fun.
Nanna cupped her hand over Esther’s cheek. “Lord willing, everything will turn out right. You’ll see. And please stop tearing up the grass. There’s a bald spot.”
* * *
Levi jumped from his buggy, the manila envelope clutched tightly in his fist. His heart thumped against his rib cage, and he couldn’t seem to catch his breath. Was he doing the right thing? He had been working on this plan for weeks, but it still felt hasty and maybe a little reckless. He squared his shoulders and took a deep breath to calm his nerves. Esther’s bathroom was finished, and Ivy had changed. She had warmed to both Levi and Esther. For sure and certain she had seen how much work it took to care for a baby and what a gute job Esther was doing. Lord willing, she had warmed to the idea of letting Esther raise Winnie.
Levi had worked for weeks to earn Ivy’s trust. Hopefully she’d listen to him and give serious thought to what he had to tell her. Most importantly, the birth certificate had arrived yesterday. There wouldn’t be a better time to talk Ivy into signing the adoption papers. And he could do it. He knew he could. How could Ivy refuse something that would mean so much happiness for everyone?
His heart raced. Mostly it would mean happiness for Esther, and Levi ached to see Esther happy. Having to cater to Ivy had been exhausting, and the thought of losing Winnie had been weighing on her for months. The uncertain
ty was beginning to take its toll. She’d been cold and distant the last few weeks, no doubt worried about losing Winnie. She barely said a word to Levi anymore when he came by to work on the bathroom. Her smile had become as rare as a blue moon, and she’d broken every wooden spoon in the house. Since the demise of the last spoon, Esther had taken to snapping toothpicks in half. That couldn’t have been very satisfying.
Levi wanted to be the one to hand Esther the signed adoption papers and see the look of sheer delight on her face. But she couldn’t know of his plan to ask Ivy today. If Ivy agreed to sign the papers, he would surprise Esther with the happy news. If Ivy said no, Esther wouldn’t have to bear yet another disappointment.
With those adoption papers signed and filed, Esther would be happy again. Maybe she’d be able to think on other things besides losing Winnie—things like maybe giving Levi a chance to win her. He wanted to take her in his arms and tell her he’d fixed everything, and maybe she’d laugh and say, “I suppose I could consider marrying you after all.”
Levi would laugh and reply, “It’s all I ever wanted.”
And it was. Even early on when he had told himself she was too old, he had just been making up excuses. Esther was everything to him. She was his sun and his moon and, well, the whole sky, really. He would be lost and utterly miserable without her. Did she even know what she meant to him? Probably not. She thought Ivy was prettier. She thought he was looking for someone younger. She thought she wasn’t wanted. Even though she was the one who’d called off her wedding, Menno had still made her feel like a ratty sweater in a secondhand store.
Levi walked up to the door and knocked with confidence. He’d rehearsed in his mind what he was going to say to Ivy. She liked him. She’d listen. He had sensed a true change in her over the last few weeks. She wasn’t selfish like she used to be. Maybe she didn’t understand it yet, but he’d explain everything, and she would realize that giving up Winnie would be better for Winnie and make life much easier for herself. She’d agree to sign the papers because deep down, she really did want Esther to be happy.
Ivy opened the door as if she’d been waiting just inside. She giggled and clapped her hands. “Oh, Levi, I’m so glad you came. The breakfast casserole is amazing!”
Levi smiled. “Breakfast casserole? Sounds delicious. Is it for me?”
“I thought we could have a special brunch.”
“Oh. Okay.” He’d already had breakfast, but he could probably eat a little breakfast casserole. “You didn’t have to go to all that trouble for me. I’m happy with coffee soup.”
Ivy’s mouth fell open in mock horror. “Coffee soup? I wouldn’t dream of making coffee soup for such an important occasion. Come and see.”
Heavenly smells greeted Levi when he walked into the house: freshly baked bread, bacon, orange juice. The scent of slightly burned eggs did nothing to ruin the other smells. Ivy led him into the kitchen. The table was set with two place settings with fancy pink napkins and a bouquet of roses in the center. “This looks real nice, Ivy. You went to a lot of trouble.” A germ of doubt niggled at the back of his mind. He had just come to ask Ivy about the adoption papers. She seemed to expect some sort of special occasion.
Ivy pulled a pitcher of orange juice from the fridge and set it on the table, motioning for Levi to sit. Then she made a big show of putting on two oven mitts and taking a huge dish of something cheesy and eggy out of the oven. The edges were burned crispy, but it looked edible. She set it on the table and sat down across from Levi.
“You’re not wearing your sling. Is your collarbone feeling better?”
“How nice of you to notice. Most people don’t even care.” With a knife, she cut two big squares from her breakfast casserole and set one square on his plate and one on hers. “Bon appétit,” she said, picking up her fork and skewering her piece.
For some reason, Levi felt more and more uneasy. What was Ivy doing? And why was she so cheerful? He cleared his throat. “Should we say silent grace?”
Ivy put down her fork so fast, it clattered on the table. “Every good Amish family says silent grace.”
He bowed his head and closed his eyes and prayed for guidance. Was it a mistake to try to convince Ivy to sign those papers today? But when would he have another chance like this one?
He lifted his head to find her looking at him. She smiled. “Try the breakfast casserole. I think I did it right.”
He stabbed a piece of casserole with his fork and took a bite. It was a little dry but tasted surprisingly good for an Ivy recipe. “Very good. I love the cheese and potatoes.”
“Thank you. Mamm used to make this at least once a week. Dat loved it.”
Levi took a deep breath as his heart hammered like a bass drum. “I suppose you’ve been wondering why I wanted to talk to you.”
She blushed. “I have been wondering.”
“I’m proud of you, Ivy.”
Her eyes searched his face. “Proud?”
“Think how you’ve blossomed since you’ve been here with Esther.”
“Blossomed” probably wasn’t the right word, but he couldn’t think of a better one. Lord willing, she’d understand what he meant.
“What?” she said, smiling as if they shared a funny secret. “You didn’t like my clothing choices?”
He chuckled. She had changed a lot. He hadn’t even been thinking about the clothes. “It’s not that. You’ve really tried to be kind to your sister and help her around the house, even though you only had one gute arm.”
Ivy held up her hands. “Now that I have two good hands, I want to help Esther even more. She does so much around here.”
“Jah. She does. And I know you help all you can. Thank you for that. Esther works very hard, and it’s nice to know you’re here to help her.”
Ivy shrugged and smiled in satisfaction. “I’m her sister. Of course I want to make her burdens lighter.”
“Gute,” Levi said. His heart now threatened to escape from his throat, but he swallowed hard and forged ahead. He showed her the manila envelope he’d been holding on his lap. “This is what I want to ask you about, and I know you will listen with your heart open.”
“That’s very nice of you to say.”
“It’s true. When you first came, you’d been through some wonderful hard things, and you didn’t trust anybody. You wanted to protect yourself, so you wrapped yourself in a hard shell.”
Her lips twitched upward. “Like a turtle?”
“Yes. And I don’t blame you, but I think the last few weeks I’ve seen the real Ivy. She’s compassionate, kind, and eager to do the right thing.”
Ivy batted her eyes. “I don’t know what to say to all this praise. As an Amish girl, I’m supposed to be humble and modest, and you’re tempting me to be proud.”
“I’m only speaking the truth.” He pulled the birth certificate from the envelope. “This came today.” He slid it across the table to Ivy.
Doubt flitted across her face as she read it. “Winnie’s birth certificate. But why did you want this?”
“Esther didn’t ask you to leave Winnie here.”
She pressed her lips together. “I know. But you said yourself, I’ve changed.”
“Yes, yes, of course you’ve changed. It’s a good change, only a change for the better.”
Her smile came back full force. “You’re so very forgiving, Levi.”
“I’m not saying this to make you feel bad for past mistakes, but Esther was completely unprepared to take care of a baby.”
Ivy folded her arms. “I couldn’t take her with me. Jordan wouldn’t—”
Levi held up his hand to stop her. “That doesn’t matter to me.” He grinned. “I was there that first morning after you left. Esther asked me to change Winnie’s diaper and feed her. She had no idea what to do.”
Ivy nodded. “I’m sure Esther was ferhoodled. She never liked children. She didn’t know how to take care of a baby.”
Levi chuckled. “Now she checks the
temperature of Winnie’s bathwater and feeds her organic baby food.”
“She’s always been nervous like that. I keep telling her she needs to relax and let life flow around her. I learned that in yoga.”
Levi picked up the roll on his plate and peeled away a layer. “What I’m trying to say is that even though Esther was angry with you for leaving Winnie here, she has since grown to love Winnie very much. Don’t you think she takes wonderful gute care of Winnie?”
“I suppose she does, though she fusses over her too much. She’ll spoil her if she’s not careful.”
Levi reached across the table and laid his hand over Ivy’s. Ivy stared at his hand as if it were a pile of money. “Esther only wants what is best for everyone. What would you think about letting her adopt Winnie?”
Levi withdrew his hand. Ivy didn’t say anything, but she seemed to be thinking about it very hard. “Then Winnie would live here with Esther?”
Levi nodded. “She wouldn’t be your daughter anymore.”
She drew her brows together. “I’m a good mother.”
Levi didn’t want to lie, but Ivy needed reassurance, not a lecture. “Of course you’re a good mother. A good mother makes the choices that are best for her child. A good mother is completely unselfish. I think deep down, that’s why you left Winnie here in the first place. You knew it would be better for her to have a warm place to sleep.” He glued his gaze to her face, choosing his next words carefully. “And maybe to keep her safe from Jordan.”
Ivy snorted. “Jordan. What a jerk. He never liked the idea of a baby. Inconvenient.”
Levi didn’t want to say any more about Jordan. Ivy had picked him, and Levi didn’t want her to think he was implying she had bad judgment. “If you let Esther adopt, you would be sad because you have a tender heart, but I think you can see that this would be better for everybody. You wouldn’t be tied down to a child. You’d be free to live your own life. Esther would get to love and raise Winnie as her own.”
Ivy stared at her plate and fiddled with one of her kapp strings. “I haven’t really thought about what I would do with Winnie, but I think I understand what you’re saying.”
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