by West, T J
Now as I look around at my lifeless apartment I’m feeling homesick for the first time in six years. I down the case of beers I bought, crank up my iPod and play some good old fashion Christmas music. There is nothing like Bing Crosby singing one of my favorites: White Christmas. Fuck yes. After my last drop of beer I open the vodka. By this time I am already feeling overly buzzed.
I grab some cold pizza from the fridge, plant myself on my ratted couch and continue with my drinking binge - that is until my cell phone starts to vibrate on the coffee table. Harmony. After I told her to get rid of my number she put it out there saying if I ever wanted to talk she would listen. Why would she fucking care? What am I to her when she has one of my best friends to worry about? Although it’s best I cut ties with her, talking sounds good.
I tease her a bit before she gives in to coming over. I wonder if Wayne knows she’s on her way over and if he has any clue I want her all to myself? But I know the dufus, so he’s probably sucking face with some chick right about now. It makes my blood boil just thinking about him hurting Harmony. Almost every single night on tour he was with a different girl, all the while he was actually involved with her.
I take a few more shots of vodka before I hear a knock at my door. I get a lazy ass smile on my drunk face and open the door to the most unbelievably, gorgeous woman I have ever come across. She just gets more beautiful every time I lay my eyes on her. I look her up and down, taking in her black stretchy, yoga - whatever you call them - pants, that cover her shapely thighs and I immediately get a hard-on. My eyes move up toward the thin green top that lays flat against her stomach, showing off her perky tits and short black sweater that I want to rip away from her shoulders. Her hair is swept up into a messy bun on top of her head and her face is clear of makeup, yet she fucking glows and takes my breath away. Damn I want her so bad my balls are aching.
My hand is grasping onto the top of the door as I lean against it and heavily gaze at her. “Harmony…..music off my tongue,” I slowly purr. I suddenly yank her from the waist and sweep her inside my apartment, making her gasp from my abrupt move. I kick the door shut from behind me and push her up against it, smelling the side of her neck. She’s intoxicatingly sweet, I want to devour her.
She has hold of my shoulders and pushes me to arm's length. “Danny, no. I’m here to listen remember?” She’s breathing hard and licks her plump, nude lips.
Damn. “You’re no fun,” I smirk.
She straightens her sweater and wipes away the wisps of hair from her face and clears her throat. “That’s what I’ve been told,” she mumbles.
I grab her hand and lead her to my couch. “Talk...what shall we talk about?” I take the bottle of vodka and take a swig of it. I offer her a taste, but she shakes her head no.
“No. You talk. I listen,” she firmly reminds me again. Fuck.
I rest my back against the cushions, turn to face her so I can see straight into those coffee colored eyes. I rest my leg upon my knee, cross my arms and bluntly ask, “Why the fuck didn’t you tell me you were into him?” I sound like a complete jerk.
At first Harmony is thrown off, not expecting me to say what comes out of my mouth, but then she quickly resumes her composure and licks those damn lips again. “First of all I don’t think it’s any of your business who I date. Second, Wayne - “
“Fucking Wayne,” I scoff, not giving her a chance to finish. I turn away and face the bottle of vodka - I so want to pick it up and guzzle it down - then lay my head back and stare at the ceiling. I want to fall asleep, but the closeness of Harmony’s presence consumes me and keeps me awake.
“How come you’re not out with the guys?”
“Didn’t want to go out.”
“So you’re here listening to Christmas songs instead?”
“Tryin’ to get into the spirit.” I look at her with a drunken smirk. “Wanna get into the spirit with me?” I try to touch her thigh, but she moves it in an instant. Damn.
“I’m not much of a Christmas spirit sort of person,” she ends with a shrug.
I continue to look at her face. My eyelids are heavy, but I can’t stop staring at her. She’s being shy with me, maybe because I am coming on to her and she doesn’t know how to handle it. She tucks a piece of hair behind her ear and slightly moves her eyes to mine and grins. A fucking beautiful grin; I see a dimple on her left cheek that I hadn’t noticed before. It’s a little dip I want to sink my tongue in. Instead I slowly put my finger on the dimple and lightly rub it. Her cheeks immediately turn bright pink, making her even more beautiful. I could definitely stare at her all night if she gave me the chance to do so.
As I keep my finger on her dimple and my head on the cushion, she bites her lip. I know she’s feeling something, she can’t hide it, but she’s being exceptionally stubborn and playing hard to get. She blinks, like the realization of getting too close to me will some how ruin things between her and Wayne. Fucking Wayne. Why him? So she gently takes my finger away from her face, and tucks her legs underneath herself. I lazily give her a half grin.
I feel the need to play my guitar and to strum along with the Christmas tunes, hoping to lighten up the mood. It’s leaning against the arm cushion of the couch behind her. I’ll joke around and pretend I can’t get reach it. I need to loosen her up. I outstretch my arm and put a strain in my voice, “Hand me my guitar will ya? Can’t. Reach. It.”
She giggles, “Dork,” and her face instantly lights up. That giggle….hot damn I love to hear it more often.
After she hands it to me, I rest it on my chest and softly play along with the song, Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas. I am such a sap when it comes to this shit, maybe it’s the vodka that’s making me this way? However, I am curious to know why she isn’t into the holiday. “So what makes you not a Christmas spirit sort of person?”
“Okay, here’s the deal,” she abruptly says. “I ask a question, you answer. Then you ask me a question and I’ll answer. It’s not a one way street, Danny.”
I quit strumming and put the guitar aside. She seems to avoid the Christmas thing, so I’ll move onto the next avoidable question. “Fine, me first. Why Wayne, huh? You know he’s a player, a cheater.”
“We’re not serious,” she mutters.
“Didn’t answer my question.”
“Okay,” she exasperates. “I like Wayne because he makes me laugh.”
I’m waiting for something else, but she ends it right there. “That’s it?” I laugh, because she’s so full of shit. If she liked him so much she would give me a better answer. Time for another vodka shot. I down the shot and hand her the bottle. This time she accepts it and pours herself one.
“Now, my question.” She squeezes her eyes shut and shutters as she takes the shot. Too fucking adorable. “What’s with the anger all the time?”
I love watching her drink. “If you kiss me I won’t be angry anymore.” Yeah, I like avoiding the questions too, but I still want to kiss her.
“Danny.”
I wipe my hands down my face and groan. I hate talking about this shit. “She was loved by him and I wasn’t. It hurts that he abandoned me to raise her instead.”
“You’re talking about your dad?”
I hold up a finger. “Ah, that was two questions. It’s my turn again.” I scoot my way closer to her hot body and look straight toward her tits. I let my fingers lightly graze along the top of the neckline; her breathing rapidly changes from my touch. “I’d really love to take off your top. Can I take it off?”
“No you may not!” She pushes me away….again.
“Damn,” I pout. “How about I sing you a song? You like Silent Night?” I take hold of my guitar again.
“I told you, I don’t like Christmas.” I start to play whether she wants me to or not. “Danny, please don’t play that song,” she begs me.
“Then kiss me, and let me take off your top.”
She begins laughing because she knows she wants me to. “No!”
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nbsp; Oh, she wants me to. She’s not a very good liar; her eyes seem to be telling me one story while her words and body language tell a different one. I don’t think, instead I react. I put my guitar on the ground and without her knowing what I am going to do I swiftly untuck her legs and spread her body onto the couch. Her breath hitches and her eyes widen from the sudden change of position. I climb on top of her and hold her down with the pressure of my body, not letting her squirm out from under me. I hold her arms above her head and finally go in for the kill that I so desperately have been wanting to do since the moment I opened my front door. I kiss the side of her throat, making her buck and giving my dick another hard-on. She smells and tastes amazing. I lead up toward her fleshy, gorgeous lips, slowly licking the bottom one. Holy shit they are so soft and silky. It’s been so long since I last tasted these lips, they feel incredible and fucking hot. My next move - biting. I gently bite on her bottom lip, bringing it to life and finally giving her a reason to let me in. Her whimpering gets my dick to twitch; our tongues match and our bodies dance. We are so fucking good together, it’s not even funny. I love tasting her. Feeling us grind against one another, you’d think we we’ve been doing this forever - we’re a perfect match.
My hands are still holding her wrists down, afraid she’ll get away from me. I take my mouth away and whisper, “You wanted me that night. I know you did.”
Her voice is strained when she gives me another reminder. “If I remember correctly, you’re the one who pushed me away.”
“And I fucking regret it.”
“You were a jerk to me yesterday and today.”
She’s right, I was a jerk. “I’m sorry. Now that’s out of the way, can I take off this sexy little thing you have on?” I take a hand off one of her wrists and try to gather the bottom of her top, but she shoves it away.
“No. I think you keep forgetting that I’m here to listen.”
Damn, she’s right again. I put my forehead on her chest and loudly exhale. Without wanting to, I release the pressure of our bodies and sit up, adjusting my junk. My boys are just going to have to wait - even if it’s torture. I shoot back another shot of vodka. My head is spinning, but I don’t care. I need the distraction.
“Tell me why you blame Faith so much. She’s as innocent as you are.” As if that didn’t just punch a hole in my chest. “Is it jealousy?”
“What?” I look at her, pissed off. “Fucking jealousy my ass.” I’m about to grab another shot when I realize something. Harmony doesn’t sound like she’s judging me. She’s stating a fact. Sure, Lucky and Faith tried telling me the same thing, but coming from them it felt different. It felt directed at me. So, I put down the vodka. “Yeah. Yeah, alright?” I am so damn tired of talking about Faith, but one look at Harmony’s dark, caring eyes….she makes me want to lay my life story out for her. “She got everything she ever wanted. A mother, a father. Family.” I turn, facing her. “Maybe I am jealous.”
Her expression doesn’t give much away; no pity, sadness, understanding. Yet there is compassion written all over her face. How the hell does she do that? She leaves my answer alone and moves forward with her next question. “What about your mom? Where is she?” She puts her elbow on the top of the couch cushion and leans her head onto her hand.
“Arizona. She’s one hell of a mom. Held down two jobs to support me with my music lessons. She’s badass.”
“You’re lucky you even have a mother,” she glumly mentions. “I don’t have either.”
Wow. This gets my attention. Now we’re getting somewhere. I finally get to know Harmony. “What happened to them?” I say softly.
“They’re dead.” Oh, shit. “My sister, Melody, raised me since I was ten.”
I have no idea what to say. I didn’t expect her life to be anything, but perfect. What a shithead I am. While I still have a mother, hers is dead - including her dad. This just sucks! I think she needs a drink more than I do right now. “Wanna drink?” I slur, but she shakes her head no. “Then dance with me.” I hold out my hand for her to take it, but she’s hesitant at first. I cock my head to the side and ask, “Please?” Giving her my pleading puppy face.
She laughs and takes my hand. “Not to ‘Baby it’s Cold Outside’ I won’t.”
“But it’s sexy. Come on, I’ll show you.” I twirl her around in the middle of my living room and we both laugh. Shit, how can her laugh be so beautiful? It’s like a breath of fresh air. The room is dimly lit, it’s perfect for this moment. I take hold of her body, bringing our chests close - very close - together and grasp onto her hips. I love her hips, they are exquisite. She’s exquisite, sexy, and I know she can feel my cock hardening on her abs. I am so turned on by her. I need to kiss her.
“You are so drunk,” she giggles.
“Not really. Not anymore.” It’s true, I don’t feel drunk anymore. Her closeness drained all the alcohol from my system, she’s that perfect for me. Our lips, once again, are inches from touching, she’s irresistible. My eyes move all over her gorgeous face and meet in the center of her black pupils. They are so intense and so damn alive I feel she can see right through me. “Dump Wayne and be with me. He’s no good for you.”
“What do you know what’s good for me?” The vital signs of ecstasy disappear in a flash. She immediately pushes me away. Why does she keep pushing me away! “You’re an angry, poor soul. I can’t be around someone like that.” I feel as though she just slapped me. It really fucking hurt to be pushed away and all of sudden be told I am no good for her. I am left standing like an idiot as she goes over to her purse and takes out her phone. She looks at it and says, “I have to go.”
I am now suspicious with who texted her. “You’re going to him, aren’t you?” I ask, bitterly.
“Call me or text if you want to talk again.” She swiftly moves to the front door.
I don’t want her to go. I am so fucking jealous of Wayne it stings inside my chest. Before she gets the chance to walk out on me I race her to the door. I get up close and cup her face. “Don’t go to him. Stay here and lets talk some more.”
I’m about to dive into her lips when she cuts me off, “Your way of talking is kissing.”
“The best way to get to know someone,” I smirk.
She stares into my eyes and smiles, then kisses me on the cheek. “See you later, Danny.”
Torture.
What the hell is that banging!
“Open up Danny, come on!”
Fucking perfect - the guys are here. Right after Harmony left last night I drank so much I passed out on the couch. I’m now a wretched mess and feel even worse.
I stumble into my jeans, almost falling face first onto the ground, yelling at the guys to stop banging on my door. I finally reach the handle. “What the fuck are you all doing here at this time?” All four of them push their way inside and make themselves at home.
Wayne scrunches up his nose and sniffs the air around my head. “You reek, dude!”
I push him away from me and sarcastically answer, “Thanks.” I don’t know what it is, but he’s irritating to be around. I have always loved Wayne like a brother, but lately he’s gotten under my skin; of course it has everything to do with Harmony. I really really hate the thought of him with his lips and hands all over her. I saw it once and I’d rather not ever see it again.
I can’t get last night out of my head. The feel of her lips, tongue, skin, body - hell, she was immaculate. I’ll do anything to be with her. I’ll cut off my right arm if it means I could have her all to myself and make her mine. Still, how am I going to do that if she’s with Wayne?
“Lyric said she’s been trying to get a hold of you all morning,” Slim mentions.
“She has?” I go over to the coffee table to get my phone. I’ve missed three texts and five calls. Shit.
Jason cuts in. “We’ve got great news, bro.”
“What’s the news?”
“Luck, it’s all yours,” Jason adds.
I look at every on
e of my guys and they’re all smiling like idiots. Lucky comes up to me and slaps me on the shoulder. He’s beaming. “Ellen, Danny-boy. We made it to The Ellen Degeneres show!”
Once again I look at the guys…...they too are beaming. Holy fuck me! “Are you shittin’ me?” I am stunned as I lean back against the couch. Head swimming.
“No, but you smell like it!” Wayne yells out. He gets a slap against the back of his head by Slim. “Ow! Dumbass!” Wayne pushes Slim back.
“It’s happening, bro,” Jason adds in. “We’re actually going to be on her show next week.”
“Maybe I should inform the paps downstairs?” Slim exclaims.
I point in his direction and yell, “Don’t you fucking dare! You and your obsession with the social media.”
“What? I was only joking, Danny!”
Wayne is in the kitchen looking for booze. “No beers, dude, seriously?” I hear him shout.
“Maybe we should run and a get a case?” Slim suggests.
“On it! Let’s go,” Wayne slaps his hands together and gets a look of excitement on his face. Before he and Slim walk out the door he adds, “Oh, hey, you need some Irish Spring soap while we’re out, Danny?”
“Get the fuck out already!” I wave them away. Wayne laughs on the way out with Slim. I cut back to Lucky and Jason. “Wow, Ellen? This is unreal!” I swipe a hand through my fohawk and whistle.
“Tell me about it,” Lucky chuckles. “Our lives have certainly changed since the tour.”