Arousing Love, a teen novel (complete)

by M. H. Strom

  “Keep going.” Joanna coaxed.

  I laughed, and looked her over again. “I actually think you’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever met.”

  “Wow, I thought you’d say something dumb, but that was pretty good.” She laughed.

  “What did you think I’d say?”

  “I donno, Matt once told me I looked good in a bikini.” She giggled. “I thought guys only noticed boobs and butts.”

  “Well, they’re nice too.” I grinned.

  She laughed and playfully smacked my arm, then she became coy, lowering her eyes. “I like the way you look too.” She tilted her head to one side and smiled at me.

  “What do you like about me?”

  “Umm. . .” She giggled. “I don’t know. . .” She stroked my arm. “You’re strong,” she glanced up into my eyes, “and I like your face. You smile a lot.”

  “So do you.” I laughed.

  “You have a nice laugh too.” She grinned.

  I felt her shiver and pulled her close again.

  “Can we go somewhere warmer? Where’s your place?” She looked up at me with large eyes.

  “My place?”

  “Yeah, just somewhere warm—”

  “It’s up there.” I pointed up the hill behind us.

  I stood up from behind the rock and offered her my hand, just as I caught sight of an old friend from high school walking his dog on the beach.

  He saw me. “Hey, Zach, what ya doing there?”

  Joanna stood up next to me, and my friend’s expression kind of froze. I didn’t say anything, just smiled awkwardly.

  “Come on.” I took Joanna’s hand, and we started walking up the hill towards the road.

  “Who was that?”

  “No one, just a guy I know.”

  “Are you embarrassed to be seen with me or something?”

  “No, it was just an awkward moment, that’s all.” I slowed down a little and we walked hand in hand. I looked at her again, her face aglow in the warm colors of the waning sun. How could I be embarrassed to be seen with her?

  We walked into the parking lot of the convenience store.

  “That’s my parents’ house over there behind the store. This is my little shack back here.” I led her to the dilapidated guest house in the backyard.

  We went inside and she looked around. The room was a bit of a mess. My computer desk and dresser were piled high with junk. The set of shelves against the wall were filled with books and art supplies, and on the floor were some dirty clothes which I pushed under the bed with my foot. I straightened my bed so she had somewhere to sit.

  “Oh, you’ve got a guitar.”

  “Yeah,” I grabbed a new shirt from my closet. “Just started learning it. I’ve mastered three whole chords so far.”

  She laughed. “Can I play it?”

  “Sure.”

  She got my guitar, sat down on the bed with it and started to play, her fingers expertly plucking the strings.

  “You’re pretty good.”

  “Yeah, I started learning piano when I was five, and picked up the guitar when I was, like, ten, so. . .”

  “You could be a pop star. You have the looks for it.”

  She laughed.

  “I’m serious.” I finished buttoning my shirt. “I better go say hi to my parents. I’ll be right back.”

  “Okay.”

  I went over to the house and called through the door, “I’m home.” I could hear the television blaring in the living room.

  “Is that you, Zach? Your dinner’s cold. You want me to heat it up for you?”

  “No Mom, I’m not hungry. I’ll eat later.”

  I went back to the shack, and Joanna was still sitting on my bed strumming the guitar.

  “I see you’ve got a shower back there.” She nodded in the direction of my bathroom. “Do you mind if I take one? I just wanna get warmed up a little.”

  “Sure.”

  She put down the guitar and went into the bathroom. “I’ll be quick,” she smiled and closed the door.

  I sat on the bed, my back against the wall, listening to the sounds of Joanna in the shower. The water stopped and my eyes were drawn to the bathroom door. What’s she going to change into? The door opened and she came out with just a towel around her tucked into itself over her chest, the small towel barely reaching to her legs. My heart was already pounding, but I tried to stay cool like it was nothing unusual to have a girl this close to naked with me in my bedroom.

  She noticed I was staring at her, and she blushed. “Do you have anything I can wear? I didn’t wanna put my wet things back on.”

  “Ah, yeah.” I went to my dresser and fumbled through the drawers, handing her a t-shirt and some shorts.

  “Thanks.” She smiled. “Um, can you turn around?”

  “Oh yeah.” I laughed.

  I turned and faced the window. The last of the sun was setting into the ocean leaving brilliant towers of castle cloud on the horizon, but I was more interested in the faint reflection I could just make out in the glass.

  “Your shorts are too big for me, but this t-shirt’s so long it’s like a dress anyway.” She giggled.

  Whoa! She looked so cute with my t-shirt hanging down like a mini dress. It was even sexier than the towel had been, I could see her shape through the thin cotton. She handed back the shorts which I tossed behind me without taking my eyes off her. My heart was racing. Does she even know what effect she’s having on me right now?

  She didn’t seem to. She was casually wandering around my room looking at all my stuff. She studied a poster on the wall. “Do you surf?”

  “Yeah.”

  “That’s so cool. I wish I could do that.”

  “Maybe I could teach you sometime.”

  “That’d be awesome.” She turned and smiled at me, and we stood there looking at each other, neither of us moving or saying anything, the tension building between us.

  “Maybe I should go.” She glanced at the door, then back at me.

  “If you want to.” I didn’t want her to.

  “Okay.” She moved towards the door then suddenly veered and kissed me on the lips. “Bye,” she whispered.

  Her kiss and the softness of her lips took me by surprise. She looked up at me with such large eyes, not moving away.

  I leaned in and gently caressed her soft lips with mine. The kiss lasted longer than I’d intended but I couldn’t pull myself away. She didn’t pull away either. The touch of our lips kindled something in us. I pulled her close and she willingly gave herself to me, my hands slipping beneath her t-shirt, feeling the warmth of her bare skin. We were both breathing hard, and I could feel her body trembling as my hands moved higher under her shirt, slowly lifting it up, revealing her body to my eager eyes.

  A phrase suddenly leapt into my mind—do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires! It made me pause, my hands hesitating their advance towards her breasts. What am I doing?

  Joanna pushed me away, looking dazed as she straightened her t-shirt.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

  “It’s okay, I have to go.” She backed towards the door, her hand reaching behind her for the handle. “Bye.” And she was gone.

  I was stunned, my heart was pounding, I couldn’t make sense of anything. Did that really happen? I slumped onto the bed, still reeling with the passion that had overwhelmed me. I couldn’t believe what had happened. I lay there trying to calm myself down so I could think. She’s fifteen! How could I be so stupid? She must hate me now. And what was that phrase, do not arouse or awaken love? Where did that come from?

  After a while, I got up and went to the house to get some dinner. My parents were sitting in front of the TV.

  “Hey Mom, have you ever heard the phrase, ‘do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires’?”

  “Yes, that’s from Song of Solomon, isn’t it?” She turned to my dad for confirmation.

  “I think so.”

  “Song of So
lomon? What’s that?”

  “It’s in the Bible.” My mom looked at me curiously but didn’t ask why I wanted to know. I’d never shown any interest in the Bible before.

  Both my parents were Christians, but I hadn’t followed in their footsteps—not since I was old enough to stay at home by myself when they went to church. It’s not that I didn’t want to believe in it or anything, just that I’d found it all so boring.

  I grabbed a Bible off their bookshelf and took it back with me to the shack. Song of Solomon was listed in the contents, and I flipped to it. I was sure I’d never heard of it before. I read through all eight chapters. It was like a poem about love and desire, and some of it I definitely could relate to.

  Your voice is sweet,

  and your face is lovely.

  You have stolen my heart

  with one glance of your eyes,

  How beautiful you are and how pleasing,

  Your stature is like that of the palm,

  and your breasts like clusters of fruit.

  I said, “I will climb the palm tree;

  I will take hold of its fruit.”

  Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you:

  Do not arouse or awaken love

  until it so desires.

  That night when I got ready for bed, I found her bikini on my bathroom floor. It was dry now, and touching the two pieces stirred feelings in me all over again.

  I lay in bed trying to sleep but my mind was filled with thoughts of Joanna. I remembered her kiss and the touch of her skin.

  Am I falling in love? I’ve never felt like this before. I feel so confused and . . . I tried to think of the right word . . . anguished? But it can’t be love, I hardly even know her. You don’t fall in love this easy. Man she’s sexy though. I like her so much.

  When I finally fell asleep I dreamed of her. She was in the shower again, and I was waiting for her. This time she came out completely naked and just stood there letting me admire all of her. Then I saw that I was naked too, and she was looking at me in the same way. I could tell she liked me and accepted me the way I was. I felt no shame.

  I woke up, the sun was seeping through the gap in the curtain, and I lay there thinking about the dream. My dreams were usually pretty unmemorable but this one felt like it meant something.

  I got out of bed and took a look at the ocean. I couldn’t see the beach from my window, but the ocean swell looked good from here. I grabbed my gear and headed out the door.

  Down at the beach I pulled on my wetsuit, grabbed my board, and ran into the sea. There were a couple of surfers out the back already, and I paddled out to join them.

  “How’s it?” I asked a guy I knew and he gave me a thumbs-up.

  I waited for the next set of swells. In the early morning light everything felt clean and fresh. A big wave came in and I went for it, cutting a swath across its glassy face.

  After a good morning’s surf, I headed back to shore. I saw a friend of mine on the beach with his board.

  “Hey Josh, better get out there before the tide changes.”

  “Hey man, what’s this I hear ‘bout you bein’ a cradle robber?”

  “A what?”

  “Heard she’s only twelve, bro.”

  I knew my friend was baiting me, but it was hitting a little close this time.

  “Try closer to sixteen. Anyway, what’s it to you?”

  I walked away. Everyone’s probably talking about it now.

  I lugged my board back up the hill. I had to get ready for work. I don’t care what anyone thinks, I have to see her again.

  Two

  I hated working at my parents’ store, the time went so slow and I couldn’t stop thinking about Joanna. I stared out the window wishing I could go see her and talk to her. I just hoped she didn’t hate me for last night.

  Then there she was. I felt all jittery as soon as I caught sight of her coming up the road. She was wearing a light summer dress and she looked so good. There were no customers so I went out to meet her.

  “Hi.” She smiled, though not with her usual glow. She kept her eyes from mine.

  “You okay?”

  “Yeah.”

  There was an uncomfortable silence as I tried to think of something to say.

  “You left your swimsuit here. I’ll go get it for you.”

  She looked embarrassed at the mention of her swimsuit. I started towards the shack.

  “Zach. . .”

  “Yeah?” I turned to face her, and she looked down at the pavement.

  “Last night. . .” She looked up at me, her eyes searching mine. “I’m not usually like that.”

  “I know—”

  “It’s just . . . the way you were looking at me and everything. I got caught up in all the attention and the way you make me feel, and then we’d gone too far and I didn’t know how to stop. . .”

  “It wasn’t your fault.”

  “I still can’t believe I did that. I wasn’t thinking. I’ve never done anything like that before.”

  “It’s okay. I really like you Joanna.”

  “Yeah I know, and I like you. That’s the problem.”

  That made me smile, and she smiled too, our smiles growing larger as we stood there looking at each other. The warmth of her smile washed over me, making me feel so happy again.

  “I should get back to work.” I glanced towards the store hoping my dad hadn’t seen me out here yet.

  “When do you get off work?”

  “Five o’clock.”

  “Okay,” she smiled, “I’ll see you at five then.”

  I watched her walk away then remembered I hadn’t given her back her swimsuit. I sighed and went back to the store.

  My dad was waiting for me. “Who was that?”

  “Umm. . .” What is she, a friend? A girl I like? “She’s someone I met.”

  He frowned. “A little young isn’t she?”

  Why does everyone think she’s too young? She’s less than three years younger than me. Thankfully, he didn’t say anything else and went back to what he’d been doing.

  Just before 5 o’clock, Joanna came into the store. Her bright smile took my breath away, I was so glad to see her.

  “I was thinking, Zach, I’d really love to see some of your paintings if you have any you can show me?”

  “Yeah, there’s some in the house I can show you.”

  I was happy to show her my art. As soon as I finished up, we went over to the house and I led her into the living room.

  “That’s one I did last year.” I pointed to the large painting above the fireplace. “And this one too.” I went around the house pointed out my paintings to her. There were quite a few my parents had hanging on their walls.

  “You’re really talented.” She peered at one of the portraits. “Do you have any more like this?”

  “There’s another portrait in my room. My parents didn’t want it for the house.”

  “Why not?”

  “It’s a nude. Not really their thing.” I grinned.

  She laughed. “I wanna see it.”

  “Alright, but the subject’s not as beautiful as another I’ve seen recently.”

  It took her a moment to grasp my meaning, then her mouth dropped open. “I can’t believe you!” She slapped my arm and laughed.

  I laughed too.

  “Who’s your friend, Zach?” My mom had come into the room.

  “Oh, Mom, this is Joanna.”

  “Hello.” My mom smiled at Joanna then gave me her quizzical eyebrows look. I’d never brought any girls to the house before so who knows what she was thinking.

  “Joanna wanted to see some of my art,” I explained.

  “Oh yes, he’s good isn’t he?”

  “He is. They’re all very good. The portraits are my favorite.”

  “He’s done some nice landscapes too. It’s a pity there aren’t more of them here. He keeps giving them away to his friends.”

  “We’re going now, Mom.” I ushe
red Joanna towards the door.

  “It was nice meeting you, Mrs. uh . . . Zach’s mom.”

  My mom smiled. “It was nice meeting you too, Joanna.”

  We went out to the shack and I unlocked the door.

  “Your mom seems nice.”

  “Yeah.”

  I closed the door behind us and we looked at each other. I could feel the nervous tension between us like we were waiting for something to happen.

  “Maybe it’s not a good idea to come here.”

  “It’s okay, I won’t take a shower this time.” She laughed, though it didn’t really ease the tension.

  I pulled my painting out from behind the shelf.

  “Why do you keep it back there?”

  “It’s not really something I’d want on my wall, and I’ve got nowhere else to put it.”

  I thought I detected a slight blush as Joanna looked over the female nude figure in the painting.

  “It’s beautiful. How long did it take you to paint her?”

  “Not long. I work pretty fast.”

  “Who did you use for a model?” She lifted her eyes from the painting to look at me.

  “It was just a photo.”

  “Oh.” Her eyes wandered a little before returning to mine. “Have you ever seen a naked woman in real life?”

  Her question took me by surprise. “Uh, you mean apart from you?”

  “Yeah.” She blushed.

  “I don’t know, probably not.” I was ashamed to admit that. “Actually, I had a dream about you last night. It felt like it meant something.”

  “What was it?”

  “It wasn’t sexual or anything, but you were naked. . .”

  I smiled as she blushed again. She was so cute. I put the painting back behind the shelf as I recounted the dream to her.

  “. . .It was like you were seeing the real me and I was seeing the real you—we accepted each other for who we really are.”

  She smiled. “So, have I seen the real you yet?”

  “You have, it’s just . . . you know, sometimes we aren’t totally ourselves with other people until we know them really well. You know what I mean?”

  “Yeah, but I’m not like that, I’m just me.”