Something Other than Fear

by Taylor, Kerry

  “I don’t know Matt. She was under the bed, the door barricaded. I had to bust in.” I replied as I got to my feet. “She’s been like this since I found her. She thought he was here.” I didn’t want to scare her more by saying his name. She was still sobbing, and her breathing was erratic and panicked.

  “I think she’s having a panic attack.” Matt said calmly. “Can you get my bag? It’s by the door. I might need to give her a sedative to calm her.” I was glad he could do something. It tore me apart to see her in so much pain. I nodded and went for his bag. Ten minutes later she was still hysterical and refusing to even let go of Matt, so he helped her take some pills and they worked quickly.

  “It’s ok Darling, The tablets are going to make you sleepy. Don’t fight it, just rest now. You’re safe. I won’t leave you.” Matt soothed as she began to calm and fall asleep.

  I moved out of her room as quietly as I could allowing her the peace she needed to drift off and finally let go of the terror. I walked into the lounge and looked around again. She had thought Phil was there, in the apartment, why? I checked the windows, all of which were locked tight, and I studied the door locks which showed no sign of tampering. The place was secure, and the door had definitely been locked when I arrived. I looked around again and then noticed the phone laying on the floor as if it had been thrown. I walked over and picked it up. I checked the call log on the screen and there was a call just over an hour earlier from an unknown number.

  “Sonofabitch!” I hissed. He must have called her and terrified her. He knew where she was. The real question was, where was he? I pulled out my cell and called the office. My senior tech, Mason, answered and I ordered him to trace the last call to Matt’s place and get back to me right away. I needed to know where the motherfucker was so we could get on and sort him out. He needed ending, as soon as possible. No way was I allowing him to do that to Lucy again.

  Just the thought of the terror he had made Lucy feel filled me with violent rage and I wanted to destroy something, but instead I reined it in and stood at the window taking deep breaths. I would get the bastard. He couldn’t be allowed to scare her in that way ever again!

  “She’s finally sleeping.” Matt squeezed his way out of her room about thirty minutes later. He looked stressed and exhausted.

  “He called her Matt, that fucker called and scared the shit out of her!” I raged in hushed tones.

  “How do you know?”

  “The phone had been thrown across the room. I checked the call log and there’s an unknown caller at 11.20, It had to be him.”

  “Shit!” Matt raged. “He knows where she is. I knew he’d find out. I mean it was obvious she’d come to me, but I thought we’d get longer before he got hold of my address and number. Do you know where he called from? Is he in the states?”

  “I’ve got my guy tracing the call now. It’s time to track the fucker down. We need to take care of him before this escalates.” We had put it on the back burner since Lucy arrived, just wanting to see that she was better and not stir things up when he seemed to be leaving her alone, but now he had started harassing her, it was time to take action.

  “Just find him Rob. I’m ready to kill the bastard!” Matt hissed.

  We very quietly cleaned the mess in Lucy’s room as we waited for Mason to call back with the trace on the call. The dresser was beyond repair so we emptied the drawers and folded the contents neatly on a chair in her room until Matt could replace it. We removed the broken dresser and I took it down to the garbage. We barely spoke, I think both just too plain angry to let words out yet.

  Finally about an hour after I had called Mason with the task, he got back to me. We were in the kitchen drinking coffee and both jumped to attention when my cell rang. I answered it in a heartbeat.

  “Mason, do you have something?” I asked hurriedly.

  “I was able to trace the call made at 23.20. It originated from the UK.”

  “Good work.” I said with relief. He was still thousands of miles away, thank Christ! “I need you to track down a guy called Philip Greystone. He’s British, there’s a file on him in my office. I need to get an exact location on the fucker as soon as Mason!”

  “On it boss!” With that he hung up and I turned to Matt.

  “He’s still in the UK. She’s safe for now at least.”

  “I have to go home then Rob. I have to stop him before he hurts her again!”

  “Just wait until my guys track him down Matt. There’s no point going over there blind. Let’s be clever about this ok? The guy’s a snake, we need to be well prepared.”

  “He’s a pathetic nobody Rob. I can crush him, no bother.”

  “I know you can, but just trust me, ok? I want to do this properly. We need a solid plan. It’s not just him. We need to think about who watches out for Lucy if you’re leaving for a while.” Matt took a deep breath and calmed down a little.

  “You’re right.” He sighed.

  “We’ll get together with Jack and put together a plan, meanwhile I’ll get a solid location on the sonofabitch. We’re going to get him Matt.” I said resolutely.

  “We have to Rob. We can’t let that happen again. She was so bloody scared.” Matt looked completely exhausted. I knew he’d been at work for almost fifteen hours before the stress of coming home to find his sister in pieces to the point of needing to sedate her, it probably was pretty exhausting.

  “We will.” I assured him. “You go and get some sleep now. You look beat.”

  “I’m fine Rob. I want to stay with her. The nightmares will be starting soon.” I saw the pain in his face. He suffered every time Lucy did and I felt the desperate need to do something to end it for both of them. Until I found the sonofabitch there wasn’t much anyone could do though.

  “I’ll stay with her. You just did a fifteen-hour shift Matt. You need to sleep. I can wake you if I have to, but I’m sure we’ll be fine.” I pushed.

  “Really mate? If you’re sure? I would argue, but I’m too bloody tired!”

  “I’m sure.” I said firmly.

  “Thanks and thanks for taking care of her tonight. I’d never have got through all of this without you and Jack.”

  “We’re family Matt.” I replied. “Now go and sleep. I’ll yell if we need you.” Finally Matt agreed and headed through to his room. I grabbed my coffee and headed through to Lucy’s room. The bed was dimly lit by a lamp on the nightstand and I could just see the outline of her curled up under the covers in the centre of the huge bed. I was so relieved to see her finally looking peaceful and content. I pulled the chair from her dressing table over to her bedside and took up my post. I needed to find Phil, I needed to end him so Lucy could find peace all of the time, not just when she slept. I would do whatever it took to never see that terror on her face again.

  LUCY

  “Nooooooo!” I leapt awake screaming from another terrifying nightmare in which I relived the last attack Phil had subjected me to. I had felt every hit, every kick, I could smell his breath as he spat vicious words in my face and then he was tearing my clothes off and that’s when I had jolted myself awake. I looked around frantically and was relieved to realise I was safe in my room at Matt’s place. Rob was sat on a chair beside the bed and he was looking at me with concern. He leant forward and took my hand.

  “It’s ok sweetheart.” He whispered and I was relieved to see him. I knew I was safe if he was there.

  “What are you doing here Rob?” I asked with confusion. My head was pounding, and I could barely think straight. I sat up a little and tried to remember what had happened before I fell asleep. Suddenly it all rushed back to me, Rob shouting at me on the way home and my storming out of his car, and then the call and Phil! He’d called and I’d fallen to pieces.

  “We didn’t want to leave you alone after….”

  “Phil?” I finished his sentence.

  “Yeah. Matt’s here. He’s sleeping, but I can get him if you want me to?” Rob offered and I realised he w
as worried I was going to have a meltdown again. I looked at the clock on the bedside cabinet. 6am.

  “No, leave him. He’ll be exhausted. I’m ok, I’ll try not to have another mental breakdown, at least for a few hours.” I joked, making him smile.

  “Ok sweetheart.”

  “He knows I’m here Rob. He rang and he said he’s coming for me.” I said nervously.

  “I know, we traced the call. He’s still in the UK Lucy. He’s full of shit.” Rob said firmly. “He just wanted to scare you.”

  “Well it worked.” I sighed. Thank goodness he was still in England. I was still safe; he was still at least an eight-hour flight away.

  “After everything that man has put you through you are going to be shaken up if he contacts you. It’s perfectly understandable Lucy, but you should have just slammed that phone down on him and called one of us. I was across the street. I could have been here with you in seconds. You don’t need to be terrified and alone anymore. You have us.” He said so kindly, but I remembered how angry he had been with me the night before and I was so confused. How could this kind man be the same one who had screamed at me just hours earlier?

  “You were really mad at me though Rob. You…..you scared me.” I admitted, my eyes filling with tears.

  “I know I did, and I am so unbelievably sorry for that sweetheart. I got angry and I shouldn’t have. I feel terrible, that’s why I came back last night, to apologise. I was out of line Lucy.” He looked so sincere, not like the apologies I had heard from Phil over and over. Rob meant what he said, and I could see the terrible guilt he felt in his face.

  “But what did I do?” I asked. I had to know.

  “Nothing, absolutely nothing. It was that guy, your boss. I hated seeing him all over you like he was. I just saw red when I pulled up. I just want to protect you Lucy, I know I handled it all wrong though.”

  “Cal wasn’t all over me Rob. He really is a nice guy and he’s not remotely interested in me. He’s old enough to be my dad, albeit a young dad.” I said with a smile.

  “Let’s not talk about him now.” He said and I knew he didn’t believe me about Cal. The whole thing really made him mad and I wondered for a second if he was jealous? “Am I forgiven for last night?” He asked.

  “As long as you promise not to shout at me like that again. I don’t like angry Rob.” I joked, making him smile again.

  “I promise sweetheart, I will never lose it like that with you again.”

  “Then you’re forgiven. I’m sorry about last night too. I still don’t really know what happened. I just freaked out.”

  “Matt thinks it was a panic attack. He had to give you pills to calm you down.”

  “Was he up for hours with me? I feel terrible for keeping you both up all night.” I said guiltily.

  “You know we don’t mind Lucy. We’re all here, no matter what you need.” Rob took my hand and squeezed it reassuringly.

  “Is Phil coming for me?” I asked the question that was going round and round my head.

  “No Lucy, he won’t get chance. We’re going to take care of it. I don’t want you worrying about that dickwad!”

  “What are you going to do?”

  “You don’t need to worry about it honey. You just concentrate on continuing to get strong. We will handle Phil.” He was so firm when he said those words that I couldn’t do anything other than believe him. The guys would handle Phil and I had to keep on moving forward as best I could. It was the coward’s way, to turn a blind eye and leave others to deal with my mess, but I was broken, so very broken and I hadn’t had time to fix myself enough to face Phil. Instead I would hide and let my brother handle my problem, just as it had always been. I really was so pathetic! So much for growing up and standing on my own two feet!

  “You should try and get back to sleep. You haven’t had much rest.” Rob suggested.

  “I’m not tired Rob. I’m going to get up and do something. I don’t want to sit here thinking about that prick anymore!” I couldn’t let him keep scaring me. I had to move on and at least attempt to take some control of my own existence!. “I might go for a run.” I mused aloud.

  “It’s really cold out there this morning Lucy. You’ll have to wrap up.”

  “I will. I love the cold here. It makes me reminds me just how far from him I am.”

  “Ok honey. Can I come with you then? I’m kinda stiff after a night in this chair.” Rob asked and I felt guilty.

  “Of course, but you’re in jeans?” I pointed out.

  “I have stuff at Jacks for when I crash there. I’ll run round now and change, and we can get going, ok?” I agreed and Rob left. I jumped out of bed determined to get myself together. I had been like a crazy woman last night; I couldn’t let that happen again. Rob had looked worried sick when I woke up and God only knew what seeing me in such a state had done to Matt. It was time to stop being so pathetic and pull myself together. And yes, the thought did occur to me, I kept on saying that and never actually doing it!

  I changed into leggings a sports bra and a lycra tank top, then I brushed and tied back my hair. My face was pale and blotchy from crying so much the previous night, so I hurriedly applied a little makeup, not wanting Rob to see me looking so rough in the harsh light of day. I pulled on a thick hoodie and my running trainers and headed out of my room, noting on the way my chest of drawers was gone. I remembered barricading the door with them and wondered what had happened.

  I crept into the hall and very quietly opened the door to Matt’s room a tad, just wanting to check he looked ok. I hated to think what I had put him through the night before. I peeked in and was pleased to hear him quietly snoring. I closed the door again and went to the kitchen to write a note in case he woke up. I stuck it on the fridge where he would see it right away if he came looking for us.

  “You ready sweetheart?” I turned and found Rob stood in the doorway, dressed in long shorts and a navy hoodie. He looked damn good in shorts, his legs just as rippling with muscle as the rest of him, and I had to stare for a moment or two.. He really was a stunning man.

  “You’re going to have cold legs.” I said with a smile.

  “I’ll live. I always run in shorts. Not really the lycra running legging type.” He joked, making me giggle. I really couldn’t see him in lycra leggings.

  We headed out of the city and into a huge park I had never passed before. It was very pretty, filled with snow covered trees which glistened in the early morning sun. We ran through and I really had to push to keep up with what I suspected was Rob’s slow run. One of his strides was about three or four of mine and I felt it, but it felt good to be out in the cold, actually pushing myself for once. It helped me to clear my head and I loved being out with Rob. You couldn’t fail to feel safe with a man his size and he made me smile just constantly, just by being near me.

  “Are you tired yet?” He called after a few miles. I was, but I was enjoying myself far too much to go back.

  “I’m ok. Can we just do another couple of miles? I asked breathlessly.

  “Sure honey.” He agreed. I decided to take the opportunity to find out a little more about this very mysterious man and hopefully talking would slow him down a little. I was huffing and puffing like a bloody steam engine!

  “You met Jack in the Army didn’t you?” I asked, beginning with one of the very few things I knew about him.

  “The marine corps, yeah. Jack was the medical officer on our team. We went through training together and just hit it off right away.”

  “He got hurt though?” I asked. I knew the general story from Jack, but I hadn’t wanted to push him for details. I knew from the few details he had let slip, he still had issues surrounding the terrible day.

  “Yeah. He was in the first Humvee with two of our team, Tom and Gage and I was in the second with the other guys. We were on our daily patrol of our assigned area and the first vehicle, Jack’s, hit an IED. It was bad, we lost Tom and Gage. Jack’s left leg was almost completely sever
ed. I’ve never been so scared in my life. We lost two brothers, and I thought I was going to lose Jack too, but we got him airlifted and he made it.” I saw the pain in Rob’s face as he talked about the awful event, and I saw then the love he felt for Jack.

  “And his leg?”

  “They fixed him up, but he couldn’t return to duty. He struggles to weight-bear on the leg for long periods of time and it causes him a lot of chronic pain. He was honourably discharged.”

  “But he never says anything, about pain I mean?” I asked with confusion.

  “Jack never complains about anything, but when he rubs his forehead, I’m sure you’ve noticed him doing it, he does it a lot. That’s when it’s bothering him. He does a lot of physio in the gym too. He works hard to control the pain.”

  “He’s always rubbing his head though Rob. I thought it was some kind of compulsion?”

  “I know sweetheart. He works too hard. But you can’t tell him. He’s happy though, so I just let him be and I keep an eye on him when I can. He’s all good, don’t worry about him.” I made a mental note to keep a closer eye on Jack myself and moved on not wanting to upset Rob anymore.

  “You served longer though?”

  “I did another two tours and then decided it was time to move on. I wanted to be here for Jack because he was struggling alone, in the aftermath of the explosion and adjusting to civilian life. Plus, if I was honest I missed him too.”

  “So you started Shepard Security?”

  “I did and I moved to the city. Jack met Matt at the hospital and got him the apartment next door and the rest is history.” He said with a smile.

  “Have you ever been married?” I had to ask.

  “No. Not even close. I’ve had a couple of relationships, but I’m too wrapped up in my work. They never get that, and things break down. It’s my fault really, but I have worked really hard to get that company to where it is. I started with a tiny office and some cheap equipment working just me and now I have twelve employees and a great reputation. I’m proud of that and it takes priority over most things.”