'Til I Kissed You

by Pam Howes

  The young couple from number five were still watching him. He smiled as he passed them. ‘I changed my mind,’ he said by way of an explanation and hurried down the stairs and out to his car. Now what, sit and wait for Roy, or go home? He decided to wait. Roy needed to be told that Sammy was in a talking mood. If he went home with any sort of attitude he would blow all chances of reconciliation.

  Five cigarettes and an hour later, Eddie felt more and more conspicuous. People passing by eyed him with suspicion as he sat in his bright red Ferrari wearing sunglasses, looking for the world like a wealthy pimp. He breathed a sigh of relief as the entrance doors to the apartment block opened and Roy bounded jauntily through them. Leather jacket slung casually over his shoulder, cigarette dangling defiantly from his lips, he looked as though he hadn’t a care in the world. Eddie observed his smiling face as he unlocked his car and got in. Roy threw his jacket on the passenger seat and turned to close the door only to find it wouldn’t move.

  He looked up in alarm. ‘Jesus, Ed! I thought it was Sammy with the meat cleaver.’

  ‘What the hell have you been up to?’ Eddie began. ‘You’ve been in there well over two hours.’

  ‘Saying goodbye to Livvy,’ Roy answered sheepishly, not quite meeting his eye. ‘She was upset, it took longer than I thought.’

  ‘I came up to the flat, Roy. Heard you behind the front door, promising to fuck the arse off her! Strange bloody way of saying goodbye.’

  Roy had the grace to look embarrassed. ‘We were messing around. I chased her down the hall and I - well, never mind what I did.’

  ‘So, after you finished shagging one another senseless, did you tell her it was over?’

  ‘Of course. That’s it now; I won’t be seeing her again. Not like that anyway. I’d still like us to help her get her musical career off the ground though.’

  Eddie shook his head. ‘Not a chance, Roy. You’re on your own if you do that. We’re through as a partnership if you go near her again and I really mean it. Now get off home. Sammy’s waiting to talk things over with you. Go and make her some promises you mean to keep. Oh, and by the way, we’ve been out walking the dog if she asks. I’ll see you on Thursday morning about six-thirty. Spend all day with Sammy tomorrow. Sort yourselves out, because if you don’t, you’re heading for divorce. You’ll lose everything, and for what? It’s not even as if you don’t get it at home.’

  Roy opened his mouth to protest, but Eddie hadn’t finished. ‘You’ll ruin all our plans. Pat and Tim are coming home. Pat doesn’t need upsets like this while she’s still recovering. She’ll never forgive you for hurting her sister. You’ll split the family and we certainly couldn’t re-form The Raiders, because Tim probably wouldn’t want to work with you. Think seriously, Roy. You’re my best mate and we’ve always been there for one another, but I can’t handle covering up for you over this. I think the world of Sammy.’

  Roy sighed and nodded. ‘Okay, Ed, enough said. You’re right. It’s just that Livvy’s hard to resist and I really do have feelings for her, but it’s over. What you heard, well that was just our way of saying goodbye.’

  Eddie smiled ruefully and patted his shoulder. ‘I told you to keep it zipped up! Now go on, get off home to your wife and sort it out.’

  ***

  Roy helped himself to a brandy while Sammy saw Jane out. He sat down on the sofa, nervously twisting the stem of his glass. Sammy walked back into the room and sat down opposite him. ‘I believe you want to talk with me?’ he began.

  ‘Well?’ She stared at him; cool blue eyes glittering with something he hadn’t seen before.

  ‘Well what?’ he replied, turning away from her gaze.

  ‘Have you seen her?’

  He nodded slowly. ‘I popped round after talking to Ed. It’s over.’ He looked at her. ‘Do you believe me?’

  She shrugged. ‘I want to.’

  He put down his glass and went to kneel in front of her. ‘You have to trust me, Sam.’

  ‘I’ve always trusted you, Roy. I can’t believe you’ve been unfaithful to me.’

  ‘I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say. Can you forgive me?’

  ‘I’ll try, but it won’t be easy. You can sleep in the guest room tonight. I couldn’t bear you near me at the moment. The thought of you in bed with her makes my flesh crawl.’

  ‘I understand; whatever you want. I’m willing to try anything to save our marriage. I don’t want to lose you; I love you, you know that.’

  ‘You have a bloody funny way of showing it.’

  ‘What more can I say?’ He hung his head contritely. ‘I said I’m sorry.’

  ‘I think you’ve said enough for now. At least you’ve admitted you want to try again and so do I. But it doesn’t mean I forgive you. It will take time. You’ve hurt me more than I ever thought possible. You can’t wipe that out with a quick sorry, or an, I love you. I can’t take anymore tonight. Let’s see what tomorrow brings.’

  He nodded. ‘Let’s have an us day. Go for a long walk, leave the cars at home. We can talk and have a pub lunch. What do you say?’

  ‘Sounds nice,’ she said. ‘I’m taking tomorrow off anyway. Jane’s offered to hold the fort again.’

  ‘Oh shit!’ Roy rolled his eyes. ‘Ed will kill me. He was planning a romantic morning with Jane. I’m fast trying his patience at the moment.’

  ‘Jane said she’d take Thursday or Friday morning off instead.’

  ‘Ed and I are going to London on Thursday morning. We won’t be back ’til the early hours of Saturday, or even later if we stay three nights, which looks likely. Oh well, not to worry.’ Roy smiled wearily, leant forward and kissed her lightly on the lips.

  She recoiled backwards, her eyes widening with horror. Shocked, he put his hand over hers. ‘Sam, what was that for?’

  ‘I can smell her perfume on you,’ she said, pushing him away.

  ‘No you can’t. I wore this T-shirt the other day, it must be from then.’

  ‘It’s not, Roy. You slept with her again. I can smell her all over you and it’s not just perfume. You smell of sex! Go away, you make me feel sick.’

  She ran out of the lounge and up to their bedroom, locking herself in the en-suite. Shocked by her reaction, Roy ran after her. She was retching as he knocked on the door.

  ‘Go away, Roy,’ she called in between sobs.

  He shook his head and walked out of the room. He crossed the landing and went into the guest room. If only he’d taken the time to shower before he left Livvy’s apartment. He lay down on the bed. He was back to square one.

  ***

  Sammy glanced at her bedside clock. Four-twenty. She was surprised she’d slept at all, considering and she felt drained. She pulled on her silk robe and went downstairs. In the kitchen the dim glow from a cigarette told her Roy was sitting in total darkness at the table. She switched on the light. An empty whisky bottle and an overflowing ashtray sat in front of him. The sweet smell of cannabis hung heavily in the air. He glanced at her, his tired eyes giving her the smouldering look she usually found so hard to resist.

  ‘Sammy,’ he faltered.

  ‘Save it for the solicitor, Roy. You slept with her again last night and I can’t even begin to forgive you for that. I hope it was worth it, because that one fuck alone is going to cost you everything!’

  She made a mug of camomile tea, turned off the lights and went back upstairs. She couldn’t even cry. Her heart felt like lead. If he’d just gone to the flat and told Livvy it was over, then yes, she might learn to forgive him in time. But Sammy knew he’d screwed her, his face had given it away when she’d recoiled backwards from him. In her heart she knew that Roy would no more be able to stay away from Livvy than he would give up smoking and she wasn’t prepared to share him. Her mind made up she decided that tomorrow she’d consult her solicitor for advice on her rights and set the ball rolling for a quick divorce.

  ***

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  Jane dropped the phone onto
the cradle and frowned. Sammy had strolled into the office unannounced and flopped down on a chair. Usually immaculate, with her smart tailored suits and expensive silk blouses, Sammy was wearing sunglasses, faded Levis, and a crumpled white T-shirt. Her shoulder length hair was scraped back into a casual ponytail, her pale face devoid of makeup. She whipped off her glasses and her cool blue eyes were ringed with dark circles.

  ‘Sam, what on earth are you doing here?’ Jane said. ‘You’re supposed to be taking the day off.’

  ‘I’ve been to see my solicitor,’ Sammy replied. ‘I’m divorcing Roy on the grounds of his adultery with Livvy.’

  ‘You can’t!’ Jane exclaimed.

  ‘You just watch me.’ Sammy’s lips quivered.

  ‘But you were going to talk last night and today. Surely you’ve managed sort it out.’

  Sammy shook her head. ‘We did talk. I almost felt I could forgive him. He said the affair was over. Then he leant in and kissed me and I could smell her on him, and I don’t just mean her perfume. He went to see her after he left Ed and screwed her again. He won’t stay away from her, even though he swears he will. I can’t handle that. I’m not sharing him with a twenty-two year old. She can have him and she’s bloody welcome to the lying bastard. But he’s gonna pay big time for this. He won’t know what’s hit him once I start and neither will she.’

  Jane sighed. ‘I don’t know what to say.’

  ‘There’s nothing to say, Jane. If she thinks she’s found a Sugar Daddy then she’s in for a shock. Roy’s worth a fair bob or two, same as Ed, but what’s his is also mine. I’m going to sting him for every last penny.’

  Jane nodded, once Sammy made a decision she rarely changed her mind. ‘My advice, for what it’s worth - I think you’re rushing things. It’s one affair. He said it’s over. It was wrong of him to sleep with her again, and I bet he wishes with all his heart that he hadn’t. But he did and you have to deal with it.’

  ‘That’s exactly what I’m doing. I can’t forgive him for last night.’

  ‘Why don’t you ask him to move out for a while? You need some space to think things through. He’s off to London with Ed tomorrow. Then he can come and stay with us until he sorts himself out. I think you’re making a big mistake. You’ll push him into Livvy’s arms right away.’

  ‘I’m not backing down.’ Sammy folded her arms. ‘He’ll be getting a letter from my solicitor and so will she. No matter what happens, I won’t be able to forget last night. He knew what was at stake and he still shagged her.’

  ‘Come and stay over tonight,’ Jane suggested. ‘Maybe we can talk some more.’

  ‘Thanks for the offer, but I’ve things to do at home. Jason’s back tomorrow night and Jess and Nick are coming for dinner on Friday.’

  ‘What about the weekend, what will you do then?’

  ‘I can’t come to you. He’ll be there. Don’t worry Jane I’ll be in touch over the weekend. I’ll be back in work tomorrow and Friday anyway. Perhaps we could do a bit of therapeutic clothes shopping. Have lunch out on Saturday, spend some of his money.’

  ‘Good idea.’ Jane stood up and put her arms around Sammy. ‘I wish we could turn the clock back to 1959 and know what we know now, don’t you?’

  ‘Yes, I do, and I know who I would have avoided like the plague. Just look at all the bloody scrapes he got me into in the past.’

  ‘Yeah, and you loved every minute of it,’ Jane said as Sammy’s eyes filled with tears that tumbled down her cheeks. Jane reached for a tissue and gently wiped her face.

  ‘I love the lying, cheating bastard to bits, Jane. But I’ll never be able to forgive him. I’d make our lives hell.’

  ‘You would forgive him in time. Why don’t you go and see Livvy. Ask her what happened last night and if he’s definitely told her it’s over.’

  ‘I plan to, but not today. I’d kill her if I got my hands on her right at this moment. Anyway, I’m going. I’ll see you tomorrow.’

  ‘Okay. Take care.’ Jane hugged Sammy and kissed her goodbye. ‘See you soon.’

  ***

  Sammy ate an early dinner and spent the rest of the night holed up in her bedroom. She locked the door and told Roy, who knocked several times to ask if there was anything she needed, that she was busy and to get lost. She called Nick and also spoke to Jason, assuring her worried boys that she was fine and planning to have a relaxing bath and a read. She’d brought a bottle of white wine upstairs. She took a glass into the bathroom and lay back in the Jacuzzi, a self satisfied and wicked smile playing on her face.

  ***

  Early the following morning, Roy knocked on the bedroom door. There was no response so he tried the handle and it opened. Sammy must have unlocked the door sometime during the night, he thought. He crept into the room to get some clothes for his trip to London. Not daring to put on the lights for fear of disturbing her, he opened the wardrobe and reached inside. Trying to do everything in the dark was proving difficult. He grabbed several hangers and carried them into the bathroom to see what was what.

  ‘Fucking hell! What the …. SAMMY!’

  Sammy stirred and lay quietly, listening to his angry expletives.

  ‘Sammy, what the fuck have you done to my clothes?’ He shook her by the shoulder and threw the remains onto the bed. Although still on hangers, everything had been cut into ribbons. He snapped on the lights and went back to look in the wardrobe. Not a single item was untouched, no tie, shirt, jacket or trousers. He opened the dressing table drawers and peered inside. His socks and underwear were also massacred. In the bottom of the wardrobe, every pair of shoes he possessed had been filled with shaving foam. Each and every bottle of aftershave and cologne was empty. Scrawled across the dressing table mirror in foot high letters and bright red lipstick was the word ADULTERER!

  He shook his head in disbelief. ‘Sammy, you fucking crazy cow! Wake up. Why have you done this? You know Ed and I have to go to London this morning, it’s important.’

  ‘So was our marriage.’ She sprang up with a dangerous glint in her eyes. ‘I’ve only done to your clothes what you’ve done to us, ruined them.’

  As he lunged at her in fury she whipped a large pair of dressmaking shears from under the pillow and waved them in the air, opening and closing the blades in a threatening manner.

  ‘One more move like that, cradle snatcher, and I’ll cut it off, balls and all!’ she warned, appearing to be enjoying every minute of his fear.

  With trembling hands Roy picked up the bedside phone and dialled Eddie’s number. ‘Morning, Ed. This is an emergency. Can you bring me a T-shirt, socks and some boxer shorts or underpants, please? I’ll explain why when we’re on our way. See you soon.’

  He shot Sammy a look of pure venom, stormed out of the room and back to the sanctuary of the guest bedroom where, fortunately, his Levis and the pair of boots he had worn yesterday were safe.

  He stomped downstairs wrapped in a bath towel, taking what was left of his clothes with him. His leather jacket was still on a chair in the lounge where he’d left it and appeared untouched.

  Eddie arrived and helped himself to coffee while Roy pulled on an assortment of his own and Eddie’s clothing.

  ‘Bloody hell, these pants are a bit snug,’ Roy grumbled, tugging at the skimpy black briefs.

  ‘Sorry, Jane likes me in tight knickers. Anyway, we can’t all be blessed with the appendage you’ve got.’

  Roy smiled weakly. ‘They say size has nothing to do with it. It’s the technique that counts.’

  ‘Precisely, and I’ve never heard Jane moaning, apart from with pleasure,’ Eddie quipped. ‘So, are you gonna tell me what happened and why you need my clothes?’

  ‘Wait ’til we’re on the way.’ Roy looked nervously over his shoulder, as Sammy appeared behind him, thankfully empty-handed.

  ‘Morning, Ed,’ she greeted him with a weary smile.

  ‘Morning, Sam. Did you sleep better last night?’

  ‘Much better, thank you,’ sh
e replied. ‘It’s surprising how a spot of revenge can do wonders for your moral.’

  ‘Come on, Ed, let’s go.’ Roy pushed him towards the door, desperate to get away from his lunatic wife. ‘I’ll see you Saturday,’ he called as they left the house.

  ***

  As the door shut behind them, angry tears sprang to Sammy’s eyes. She went through into the lounge, collapsed on the sofa, buried her face in a cushion and sobbed. The revenge had been sweet, but short lived, and she knew it wasn’t the answer. She hated Roy going away without a kiss goodbye and them saying, “I love you and be safe.” ‘Oh, Roy, what have you done to us? Why wasn’t I enough for you,’ she moaned brokenheartedly, punching the cushion and wishing it was Livvy’s head.

  ***

  ‘I’ll just check my alarm’s on.’ Roy strolled round to the side of the house where he had parked his Lamborghini.

  As Eddie unlocked his car he heard a howl of utter anguish and dashed to Roy’s side. The car had four flat tyres and the paintwork on the bonnet was blistering and peeling.

  ‘The fucking cow! She’s slashed the tyres and poured paint stripper on the bonnet. Oh, how could she do this, Ed? I’ll fucking kill her!’

  Eddie caught hold of him as he hurtled towards the house. ‘Leave it, Roy. Sort it out when we get back. Let her cool off a bit. She’s wreaked her revenge on your favourite toy. She probably won’t do anything else just yet.’

  ‘She’s fucking crazy!’ Roy yelled waving his fists at the closed front door as Eddie pushed him into the passenger seat of his car. He started the engine and quickly drove away.

  ***

  Shocked into silence by Sammy’s actions, they were halfway down the M1 before Roy could bring himself to speak and tell Eddie what Sammy had done to his clothes.

  ‘What did you expect, Roy? Sammy’s no wimp and you know that. Did you know she’s seen a solicitor? She told Jane yesterday. She’s divorcing you on the grounds of your adultery with Livvy.’

  Roy’s eyes opened wide. ‘Divorcing me? She hasn’t told me that.’