by J Turbett
"Oh well, then, hurry out, honey." Her mother handed her the little handbag Alice was borrowing and threw a black wrap over her bare shoulders. Little did her mother know that inside the purse was a knife as well as her I.D. and invitation. Not that she even needed that. Everyone in town knew who she was by now, especially since her impromptu make-over. It was still strange to her that she needed a knife to go to a fancy millionaire’s party. She got into the car with Adam as quickly as she could on heels.
"We're not late," she said as he started the car. It would be a three-minute drive.
"No, it's a trick. Parents never pay attention to time when their child is dressed to the nines. I just didn't want to stand there feeling like a high-schooler while your mother fawned over you." Alice laughed, then suddenly got serious again.
"I have to talk to Brassila." The car screeched to a halt.
"What?" he asked, trying to recover from the shock.
"You know, a week ago when I met you on the boat asking about my family...well, David found the knife. He wants to know what's going on. I told him that I’d tell him on his birthday, which is only a week away. I had to say something." For a moment, Adam looked like he was really fond of the idea of beating his head against the steering wheel.
"You couldn't have told me about this when I took you shopping? In fact, I want to know how you can stay away from people as much as you do and still cause as many problems as you do."
"I'm gifted at attracting trouble," she said, that dead sound creeping back into her voice. Adam didn't answer; he wasn't about to touch that one, he still didn't know exactly what had happened to her. He knew she had to have been raped; the way she reacted to certain things was typical of rape victims. Then there were other things, like the knife, and her grandmother. She always tried to keep the knife as far from her as possible. He wasn’t stupid; he could put a few things together without her telling him the details.
“David…”
“Didn’t tell our parents, but he’s not stupid either. He knows there’s something weird about the knife, that it’s not normal.”
Adam sighed, pulling his car slowly onto the beach. He was tense. He watched shadows crawling from the surf like monsters in a cheesy creature feature. The guests were arriving. He was attending a fish party and he was likely the only human; this couldn’t possibly go wrong. He turned off the ignition and put earplugs in his ears.
"What are those for?" Alice asked.
"Remember the whole thing about singing I told you?"
"Yeah?"
"This deadens the sound enough so that it won't affect me and I can still keep some semblance of a rational mind. Noise-cancelling. It works, I swear."
She looked up at him terrified, "There's going to be singing?"
"Everyone sings at a fish party—except, of course, me,” he smiled. Alice didn’t return his smile. She knew it was coming before the words came out of his mouth: she would have to sing. He ignored her fear as he stepped out and walked around the car to open Alice's door. For a second, Alice didn’t move, she just stared ahead at the ghostly figures. She took a deep breath, then took his proffered hand.
Adam led her into the party, where they were properly announced as they came in from the beach entrance. "Local Doctor, Adam Carson, and the transform, Alice Bailey." Every head within hearing distance turned to stare directly at her. There was the “transform” word again. She hardly recognized a single face. Plus, bringing a human to the party certainly wasn’t common. No one hid their stares, nor did they hide their guarded whispers. Alice felt like running for the beach screaming at the top of her lungs.
"Don't worry, it's going to get worse," Adam said, applying pressure to her hand. She stared at him angrily as he escorted her to the floor where people were dancing. It was a wide open, classic ballroom, with one wall lined with floor-to-ceiling mirrors that looked out over the ocean. It was beautiful.
"That's supposed to make me feel better?" Alice whispered fiercely, ignoring the splendor that embraced her. She felt claustrophobic in the mass of people that surrounded her, stared at her as she danced with the doctor. There was a live band on stage and someone was singing with them, "Black Magic Woman." There was a karaoke-style setup, but apparently no one was bad. Some were better than others, but everyone could sing.
"It's a folk thing. Singing is always important, and, on land, dancing is equally important." He said, sending her into a twirl, admiring the way the dress fell around her. The song was changing and someone else was moving up to the stage. Alice saw a flash of blond hair.
"Finn?"
"Everyone sings. You'll be expected to sing, too." Alice looked up, cursing him in her mind. That was not something she really wanted to be reminded of. The footwork wasn't bad for Alice but Adam was having trouble as Finn broke into song. Alice looked up.
“Imagine me and you, I do, / I think about you day and night, it's only right.” So many people were smiling at Finn. His voice filled the room with a charm that made the temperature rise. It was so unlike his personality. Behind the charm, Alice recognized an air of distaste in his voice. It was a romantic song, but he was putting no feeling into it whatsoever; to him, it was just a chore, though he made it sound convincing enough. As Adam spun her again, Alice found herself following Finn. He wasn’t looking at her; he wasn’t looking at anyone. That hidden sadness, Alice knew, was the emotion of losing yourself, put straight into song. It put her off guard to understand him so well. She knew that was how the language of the folk worked, but no one expressed that emotion but her. She looked around and could tell no one else heard it. They were just enjoying the song. Alice caught a flash of blond highlights in the crowd and noticed Ashley was near the stage, her eyes glowing, like she was certain he was singing just for her. There were glassy eyes everywhere, enjoying the song, not noticing the mournful undercurrents beneath.
"Finn's expected to dance with everyone tonight, including visitors. My guess is, he probably won't be easy to find after his song." As Adam spoke Alice almost jumped, then turned back to her date. "Alice, you should probably sing next."
"Um, Adam? I only sing in the shower. I would rather go dead last, after most everyone has left."
"Are you bad?"
"Well, I don't know, I guess. I've never sung in front of anyone! David always complained, but he's my little brother; he's required to."
"Come on, you'll go next." Alice bristled as he moved her into position.
"What do I sing?" she whispered fiercely. It was too late. Finn was turning to leave, going down the stairs on the opposite side of the stage. Others were ushering her up, and the band looked at her expectantly. They must know thousands of songs to have been able to do this with karaoke. She looked out at the audience; they was expecting her to open her mouth any moment. Ashley was suppressing giggles. She had found her friends among the crowd and they were, of course, laughing with her. It seemed like there were more of them than usual, one of them sporting a fresh scar across one of her eyes.
This was not what Alice had been expecting. As if the dress wasn’t bad enough, now she had to perform, too. The look that Ashley gave her made Alice’s blood run cold and wiped every song she possibly could have thought of from her mind, so Alice turned to the band and said the first song that came to her mind. The song that had introduced her to this extremely messed up town. “Mr. Sandman.”
A couple of people walked up to other mikes as her back-up singers. She caught sight of white-blond hair and suddenly Tommy was up on the stage between two women. This was not, this was not, oh fuck.
“Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream, / Make him the cutest that I've ever seen.” Ashley's face fell immediately. Several of the older people in the room were smiling at her. It was a pleasant change from the looks she had been getting after walking in with a human. She looked over at Tommy and saw his familiar smirk. He was dancing with the bassist, until he put in that “Yes?” She cringed but didn’t stop, she just looked away from Tommy
’s piercing gaze. It seemed like he knew more than anyone else in the room.
She caught a glimpse of Finn trying to escape as carefully as he could. He didn't want people to notice that he was slipping away, and she was helping him. No one was looking at him. Everyone was transfixed on the transform, the newest transform that any of them had heard. It wasn't going badly; she could see Adam smiling up at her. So she began to get into it a little. It was almost fun.
“And lots of wavy hair like Liberace!” She threw her head to the side, her hair bobbing along. It was adorable, endearing even. She was singing herself into the hearts of these people she didn’t want any part of. A chill ran up Adam’s spine as he watched her finish the song. Though she sang with all her heart, there was something he didn’t like in it, something that that made his skin crawl.
As the band segued into a filler song, Alice stared out over the smiling crowd. She awkwardly gave up the mic and got off the stage as quick as she could, managing to avoid the people trying to praise her as she stepped down. She slipped through the audience and disappeared as fast as she could. It wasn't just the embarrassment of having sung in front of an audience: she had to catch Finn. He had very adeptly used the distraction she had created, and she had to catch up with him. He was the only one who could take her to Brassila. He was outside already, peeling off his tux jacket, unbuttoning his pants, heading for the ocean.
"Finn! Wait."
He spun, furious. "What do you want?"
She almost turned away. He was so angry, so desperate to escape.
"How's your grandmother?" she asked sheepishly. He looked at her suspiciously, looking for some hint of sarcasm.
"She's alive still, hanging on."
"That makes her the clan leader right? I need to talk to her,” she paused as his eyes narrowed. “David, my little brother, found my knife. He wants to know what's going on." Finn's eyes flared. To most people, he would have said they were stupidly careless and deserved anything that they got for making such a big mistake. But he knew, like no one else, how Alice felt about knives.
"Fine, follow me," he said, buttoning his pants back up. He was still wearing his shirt, which made Alice smile. Shirts just weren't Finn's style, at least not when buttoned. He left his jacket on the sand. Alice figured he probably didn't care; he likely owned the tux and could afford another.
They slipped into the back entrance, near the enormous kitchen. Alice had to stop herself from gawking. They could hear the party, but it was far away. Finn was guiding her in a way that avoided being discovered by anyone else. They headed up a set of stairs that squeaked. Finn flinched at every noise, though there was no way anyone in the ballroom could hear them.
Alice had never been in a house this large. Without him as a guide, she knew she'd get lost, and was further affirmed in this belief when, on the third story, he opened a wall. She couldn’t have guessed there were seams there if she hadn’t seen him open it. If there were more hidden rooms, she'd never be able to find her way around.
The room inside was dim, and there was a woman lying on a bed at the focal point. She looked frail, like she would fall apart at any moment. Her eyes were a deep brown, like Tommy's, and her hair was long and stark white. She was old, but Alice could see her undimmed beauty. Even time could not take this woman down. This was the woman Matthew had loved, the woman on whom he had spent endless amounts of money building a town in the middle of nowhere. Time seemed to slow down.
"Finn," Brassila breathed. Alice felt immediately uncomfortable and knew that she didn't belong. She wanted to run in the other direction, but she couldn't. David's life was on the line. For a moment she understood how Finn could be upset about the woman in the bed dying in front of his eyes. This wasn't the quick death her grandmother had. This woman was dying slowly, alone, away from her clan, but still forced to be a part of it. She was a matriarch.
"Grandma, I've brought the new transform. She would like to ask permission to tell an outsider. Her brother," he said, giving Alice a poisonous look. When he turned back to Brassila and moved to the side of the bed, his face softened. It was an expression Alice had never seen on Finn.
"Come here, Miss Bailey." Alice moved closer. She could do nothing else; the woman commanded respect. Brassila took her hand as Alice sunk into a plush chair beside the bed. "The question is not a yes-or-no question. Your brother as much one of us as you are; he just doesn’t know it yet. I hear you have a voice as prized as your grandmother."
"My grandmother?" Alice looked around the room. There was a flat screen TV showing Brassila the entire party, playing softly. Kari was on stage now, singing some Britney Spears song and looking for someone, probably Finn.
"Emma, your grandmother. She fell for a soldier and was exiled when she chose to marry him and begin living a human life. She was no clan leader; she was just a maid with a beautiful voice.” Brassila sighed, her chest rising and falling almost straight into the bed. “I knew her once.”
Finn looked surprised. “Grandma?”
“You look so much like her,” she said, ignoring her grandson. “In my younger days, I met her. She was a Wanderlust, a mer without a clan. I wanted to be like her. For a while, we swam together, until she found Mickey,” she looked at Alice with those deep, penetrating eyes, “You are new but your bloodline is old. In this house there are histories of folk from all over the world. Volumes upon volumes, dating back further than I can tell. My clan used to number around five hundred, but in my lifetime we are now one-fifth that size. Humans scar the sea and the folk can do nothing about it. They must not know of us, and there are so few of us now. We lose so many to the temptations that land has to offer: technology, and men," she said sadly. "You," she paused, dragging in a labored breath, "You are as true as any of the other maids your age. You loved water from an early age, yes?" Alice didn't have to answer. She thought back to her swim meets, her grandmother always cheering her on but never going near the water herself. Now Alice knew exactly why.
When her grandma went to the ocean, she had always kept a respectful distance while Alice played in and out of the waves. It was because she had to, because she couldn't go into the water! She couldn't risk her kind. It was so startling to Alice, this new information, that she could hardly keep her brain processing everything that Brassila was saying. From a population of five hundred down to one hundred, in a span of only eighty or a hundred years. Alice marveled, looking at the frail old woman.
"There are so few males compared to the women. In some tribes, the ratio is five to one. It makes sense that a maid would look to the land for a husband, but it is almost a crime to take the water from those who love it as much as your grandmother. Young Bailey. Downstairs is my clan, and many visiting from others. Some just visiting, some looking for mates," she paused and turned to Finn. "How many women are down there chasing you, Finn?" she asked slyly. Brassila knew her grandsons. She knew how much Finn avoided the other girls, avoided everyone in general, but she wouldn't punish him. She knew, in time, Finn would learn, as she had learned, that you can't get through your troubles alone. On land, humans surrounded themselves with people, with friends, with family. Mer were also social creatures, but the sea was such a lonely place. Maybe Finn wouldn't learn before she left, but she had faith in him.
"Ten of them," Finn answered bitterly. Brassila tried to laugh, but it was so weak. Alice could smell the death in the room, but the woman wore it so well. For a moment, Alice almost felt sorry for Finn. Maybe it was easier to watch someone go quickly than to see a loved one suffer.
"I do not think I will see you mate, Finn," Brassila smiled weakly at him, as if it were an effort even to force the muscles of her face to make an expression. "Did you bring your knife, young Alice?" Alice pulled it out of her purse and showed it to the woman. “Finn, go to the drawer in that dresser and bring me the box inside.”
Finn obliged his grandmother dutifully. “You do not need that curved blade,” she said as she opened the box carefully. In i
t lay a sheathed knife barely visible in a hairnet studded with pearls. Brassila picked it up and handed it to the younger woman. Alice stared: it was just like the one in her dream. “Take it, my dear. Your grandmother was a truer friend to me than anyone. It is a woman’s blade, and, alas, my only heirs are men.” Alice continued to look at the knife, then realized that it was with much effort that the old woman was still holding it aloft. Finn stared at them both, wide-eyed. “Go on, my dear,” prompted Brassila. Gently, Alice took the blade from her wrinkled hands. The net was intricately knotted and studded with jewels, and the hilt held an emerald the size of Alice’s thumb. Alice was startled speechless. She looked at Finn, who did not return her gaze. It obviously irked him that his grandmother was passing this to her. Alice had a feeling that the passing of a blade meant more to the folk than she could understand.
“I…I can’t take this.” Alice replied meekly as the blade sat in her hands.
Brassila found Alice’s eyes, “You can and you will.” The statement left no room for further arguments. This woman was strong, even in her deathbed. "I know you will keep it well,” Brassila continued. “You are a strong woman, Alice Bailey. I am proud to have you as part of my clan. Bring your brother to this beach and show him. Let him make his own decision, just as you will eventually make yours." She turned her face away from Alice and looked up at Finn again. Alice suddenly had the feeling that she was completely out of place. Brassila smiled as she squeezed her grandson’s hand. A current passed through her body. Alice watched as her eyes fluttered closed. She said nothing, Finn said nothing. She could no longer see Brassila's chest moving up and down. They knew she was gone. Alice had just witnessed the passing of a titan.
She stood, horrified. She felt so much for this woman she had only just met. It was all so very confusing, and if she weren’t frozen on the spot, she would have backed away reflexively. She could do nothing but stand there in silence, fighting the emotions that threatened her.