Saving Us

by Heather D'Agostino

  “They’re ready,” a young woman leaned out the door and motioned to me.

  “I love you,” Cole whispered as I stood shakily and followed the woman inside. The closer I moved to the witness stand, the more I began to shake. I knew I needed to be strong, but seeing Richard sitting there so confident, made me feel small and insignificant.

  After being sworn in, Sebastian stood and began going over the questions we’d practiced the week before.

  “Miss Kennedy, how do you know the defendant?” he moved out from behind the prosecution’s bench.

  “He was my boyfriend in college.” I darted my eyes around refusing to look at Richard. I didn’t want to see the smirk that I knew adorned his face. As Sebastian ran through the questions about how we met, how long we dated, and then what ultimately led to me leaving him, I let my body go numb and my mind sink back into the past.

  “Madison?” Richard’s voice was low and menacing as he moved through our apartment. I knew he’d found out about my study session during lunch, but I was hoping he would have calmed down before he came home. “Get in here now!” I heard his fist slam down on what must have been the counter. Dishes rattled, and I cringed as I slowly opened our bedroom door.

  I moved into the kitchen just in time to see Richard gripping the edge of the counter with both hands. He was facing the floor, and his shoulders were rising and falling in ragged pants. “How was your day?” I tried to keep my voice even as his eyes lifted to meet mine. Gone was the happy man I’d spent the morning making love with. In his place was the angry one that seemed to come out more and more over the last several months. His eyes were cold and held no emotion as he shoved off the counter and stalked toward me.

  “What have I told you about disobeying me?” he growled. “Is it that fucking hard to do as I say?” His voice roared, causing me to flinch. “Stop whoring yourself around, and show me some respect,” his hand moved so quickly that I didn’t even see it before I felt the sting on my cheek.

  My head snapped to the side from the force of his hit, and I ducked to avoid the next one. “Please Richard, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I tried to hold in the tears, but as I felt the throb right below my eye, I began to whimper.

  “I saw you!” He moved closer and I stepped back. “You were in that fucking coffee shop with HIM!” He wrapped his hand around my neck, and pushed until he had me pinned to the wall. “He can’t have what’s mine, Madison. Do you understand me?” Richard leaned in and I closed my eyes as I swallowed and gasped for air. He wasn’t choking me yet, but if he squeezed any harder I might blackout. “He thinks he can touch you. Tell me this,” he leered. “Does he know what type of woman you are? Always doing what you want? Never respecting me or what I mean to you?” his breath wafted across my face, and I could smell the faint scent of bourbon.

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I’m sorry Richard. I won’t do it again,” I tried to sound convincing, but I knew it would take all night to calm him, and the plans I’d made would be push aside again. I needed to study, but instead I’d be calming him down trying to find the boy I fell in love with under all this anger.

  I shook my head coming out of the memory, “That was just one of many.”

  “I’m sure you’ve suffered many emotional scars over the years, but I’d like to talk about the physical ones,” Sebastian’s eyes softened. I knew he didn’t want to put me through this and was only pushing the issue to put the final nail in Richard’s proverbial coffin.

  “Yes,” I swallowed against the bile rising in my throat. “I have a small scar on my thigh, one on my elbow,” I lifted my arm to show the two inch scar that ran along the back of my arm right across my elbow, “and one here,” I pointed to my chin. I always covered it with makeup, but as my fingers ran across the area, I felt naked.

  “Do you mind telling us how you received these?” Sebastian began stepping back so I could be seen.

  I nodded as I shifted in my seat. “The one of my thigh was caused by a broken spindle on a set of stairs. Richard, and I were supposed to be on a romantic getaway. He’d promised me that once he passed his finals, he’d take me away to celebrate. We’d been having a rocky couple of weeks, and I’d jumped at the chance. I thought it was the perfect way to get things back to the way they were when we first met. He’d been tense with trying to prepare for the bar exam, and I just wanted to get past it all.” I watched Richard roll his eyes across the room.

  “This is it babe, we’re finally alone,” Richard grinned as shoved open the door to the beach house he’d rented us in the Cape.

  “Wow, it’s beautiful,” I gasped as I stood in the entryway staring up at the wooden staircase in front of us. “It’s huge. We didn’t need anything this big,” I giggled as I turned to look at him.

  Richard’s face went from happy to scowling in a matter of seconds, “What’s that supposed to mean? Do you think I can’t take care of you?”

  “No,” I shook my head in a panic. I’d seen so many mood swings over the last week that I was getting to the point that I was afraid to say anything. “I just meant that there are only two of us. We could have stayed somewhere smaller,” I whispered. “It’s perfect, really,” I moved in front of him. “I love it, thank you,” I lifted up onto my tip toes and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

  “I’m gonna shower and then we’ll go eat somewhere,” he grumbled as he stormed up the stairs.

  That encounter should have been a warning on how the weekend would go, but trying to be optimistic, I didn’t heed the warning signs. When we got to the restaurant, Richard was determined to find something to be angry about. He’d ordered my food without asking what I wanted—his excuse was that I needed to lose weight—then he accused me of flirting with the waiter. When we got home that night he was in such a rage, that he stormed up to the master bedroom and all but demanded that I meet his needs. Deciding that I’d had enough of his abuse for that day, I stood up to him and told him no, and that’s when it started.

  He shoved me to the ground and began kicking me. As I scrambled to get away from him, he grabbed my foot, and began dragging me toward the bedroom door. I kicked and clawed at anything I could find to get away, and when I broke free of his grip, I raced to the stairs.

  “Madison!” he stormed after me grabbing my arm. I turned and sunk my teeth into his forearm causing him to howl in pain and release me. “You bitch!” He raced after me, holding onto his hurt arm. He slapped me, and I lost my balance. It took all of two seconds for me to go tumbling down the stairs. There was so much force behind my fall that when I hit the railing, it broke, and a spindle stabbed me in the leg.

  “I still remember the look of remorse on Richard’s face when he carried me into the ER. He told the nurse that I’d been carrying something up the steps and tripped. I didn’t contradict his story.” I turned my face to stare at Richard before looking back at Sebastian, “That was the first time I’d thought about leaving.”

  “Why didn’t you?” Sebastian’s eyes held sorrow as he waited for the response we’d rehearsed.

  “Because I loved him, and I thought with time, I could change him. I didn’t realize that staying with him was only making it worse. The longer we were together, the better he manipulated me into thinking it was my fault and I got better at covering for him. It took this,” I touched my face, “for me to finally leave and never look back.”

  Chapter 16

  Maddie

  I watched Richard’s face redden as he stared at me, giving the same warning look that he always had before I opened my mouth. He was fuming, but he was keeping it hidden just like he did when we would go out. A small amount of satisfaction caused me to narrow my eyes at him. I was finally getting what I always wanted: a chance to tell people who he really was. I just hated that it took Cole getting hurt for it to happen.

  “Miss Kennedy, if you could, please tell us how it happened,” Sebastian motioned to where I kept touching my face. Richard had only done this to m
e once, but once was one time too many, and my fingers ghosted over the small scar.

  “Come on baby. I want to take you out to celebrate,” Richard smiled as he leaned in the doorway. I couldn’t help but grin back. The man that I loved had been here for two weeks now. We’d been getting back to the happy times, and he was once again the loving, attentive boyfriend that I’d met on the quad all those years ago.

  “Did you win?” I smiled and bounced on my feet.

  “What do you think?” he smirked as he moved farther into the room.

  “I think you kicked butt,” I giggled as he walked over to the closet.

  Richard had been paired with one of the senior attorneys in his firm on a case that they’d been working on for several months. It wasn’t high profile, but it was time consuming and his boss wanted him to get the experience.

  “Rich,” I called as I walked to where he’d disappeared into the closet. “Where do you want to go?” When he didn’t answer, I slowly turned, wrinkled my forehead, and began shuffling after him. When I got to the walk-in’s door, I paused and stared at his back. “Rich?” I reached out with a trembling hand and placed it on his shoulder.

  His posture was stiff, and his voice low as he spoke without turning, “Who is he, Madison?”

  “Who’s who?” I asked confused by his inquiry.

  “The man you’re fucking. Who is he?” he growled as he slowly turned to face me.

  “I’m not…I promise…I…what are you…Rich?” I stammered as I slowly backed away from him.

  “Don’t lie to me,” he warned as he reached over and grabbed an evening gown off one of the many racks. He held it by the hanger and waved it in front of me, “You don’t dress like this for me, and I didn’t buy this so I’m going to ask you ONE MORE TIME! WHO IS HE?” He stormed up to me and wrapped his fingers around my neck as he pushed me out of the closet and into our room.

  “I promise,” I begged. “There’s no one else. Only you. I promise,” the tears began to leak from my eyes, and every muscle in my body tightened as it prepared for the beating it was getting ready to take. I should have known that our happiness was short lived. It always happened like this. He’d be fine, and then somewhere in the back of his mind he’d twist some fantasy into reality.

  “Who bought the dress, Madison!” he bellowed. “Who the fuck bought it?” He tossed the dress onto the bed, and it landed in a pile of red silk, the hanger bent from his iron grip.

  “I did!” I cried. “I wanted to surprise you for the ball this weekend,” I tried to scramble out of his grasp, but I wasn’t fast enough, and he pinned me to the bed with his body.

  “Don’t lie to me!” he roared again as his gripped tightened on my throat. I squeezed my eyes shut and gritted my teeth just as I felt the sting of the slap across my face. “Don’t fucking lie to me, you whore,” he seethed and leaned so close I could feel his breath on my cheeks.

  Knowing that if I didn’t get away, he might kill me caused me to fight back. Normally, I just took it, thinking that it would be over soon and resisting would only make it worse, but something in me snapped. I began thrashing against him, and my nails clawed at his arms. I lifted my knees and pushed against his stomach with every ounce of strength I had. Somehow, in all the twisting, I made contact with the one spot that caused him to recoil.

  “You bitch!” his hissed as he cupped his balls and rolled to the side in pain. I took that moment to spring from bed and race out of the bedroom of our brownstone. I scrambled into the kitchen, grabbing wildly for the phone just as he thundered after me, and wrapped his fingers through my hair, yanking me backward in the process.

  I felt my back crash into his chest. One arm wrapped around me right under my breasts and the other gripped my chin so hard I could feel it bruising. “Where do you think you’re going?” His voice had a fake sugary sweet sound. “You don’t get to leave unless I say so,” the hand on my chin began to force my head toward him, and when I saw the look in his eyes, I squeezed mine tight.

  I didn’t want to see this version of Richard. This man was not the man I loved. This man was a shell of who he could be. “You don’t ever fucking run from me, you hear?” He moved closer and pressed his lips to mine. As soon as he began to force my mouth open, I bit down as hard as I could. I tasted the blood, and when his grip loosened in shock, I shoved him away once again.

  I barely made it around the corner when he lunged for me once again. This time, I wasn’t as lucky. As his fingers wrapped around my ankle, my body continued its forward momentum, causing me to fall. On my way down, my face smacked against the counter with enough force that I blacked out.

  “When I woke up, I was in the hospital with a bandage on my face,” I reached up and touched the spot where the scar from that night lay hidden under the camouflage of today’s makeup. “Richard was nowhere to be found, and the nurse said when the ambulance had brought me in, I was alone. I suffered from a concussion, two broken ribs, a skull fracture, and several lacerations,” I connected my gaze back to Sebastian; I didn’t want to look at Richard anymore. I didn’t want him to see how he’d broken me. He’d tried to do exactly what he’d promised, make it so no other man would want me.

  I shivered and rubbed my hands up and down my arms to ward off the chill. Even though it was summer, I felt cold and empty. “I decided that I’d had enough, and after I was released from the hospital, I made my escape. I waited until I knew he was at work before I went home to pack my things. I shoved everything I could into a suitcase, grabbed my wallet and keys, and fled to a hotel. I went to the bank, transferred money into my account, and made sure Richard didn’t have access to it. It took me a while to feel safe around town, but after that night he didn’t try to contact me. I kept to myself, finished school, and got a job.” I tipped my chin and twisted my fingers in my lap. “I thought I was finally past all this until a few months ago.”

  “What do you mean by that?” Sebastian tilted his head to the side.

  “I started getting letters at work and at my apartment; someone started following me, and he,” I pointed at Richard, “started making threats. He’s been threatening me and my boyfriend.”

  “Thank you, Miss Kennedy,” Sebastian stepped back and seated himself behind the prosecution’s bench Josh, Richard’s lawyer, waved his hand motioning that they didn’t have any questions.

  I stood, and shuffled as quickly as I could out of the room. I wanted to get as far away as possible. Remembering the past, and thinking about the woman I was then was slowly killing me. I never thought of myself as weak, but listening to myself tell those stories made me feel exactly that.

  When I pushed through the door, Cole was standing there waiting with his arms open. I couldn’t help but fall into his embrace. “Shhh,” he soothed. “It’s over. You’re safe.”

  I nodded as I murmured against him, “Please, take me home.”

  Without answering, Cole turned us and led us out of the courthouse and to his Explorer. According to what Sebastian had told us earlier in the week, Cole’s testimony would come later. I was secretly hoping that Richard would take a deal, and it would all be over. However, seeing his face in there while I recounted our history had me believing that he was going to make me live through it over and over. It was exactly the type of thing he would do just to punish me.

  ooooooooo

  Cole

  “So how’d it go?” Wes crossed his arms, and leaned against the front desk at the gym. I’d been here with Maddie for the last two hours letting her work out her aggressions on the heavy bag. When we’d gotten home from the courthouse, she’d practically begged to go to the gym. Ang was napping in her room, and Wes had left note saying she’d practically thrown him from the apartment when she’d gotten home.

  “How does it look like it went?” I tipped my head in Maddie’s direction. “She hasn’t let up since we got here.”

  Maddie had already gone a few rounds with the heavy bag, but she was more worked up than I’d ev
er seen her. Sweat was dripping down her back and chest, and pieces of her hair were plastered to her face.

  “Hey, champ,” Wes called out and I scowled at him.

  “What the hell are you doing?” I hissed when Maddie paused in her attack to stare at him.

  “Trust me,” he murmured. “I know what I’m doing. I deal with this all the time.” He began walking over to Maddie, breathing heavy, hands on hips, tears of anger now trickling down her cheeks. “Feel any better?”

  “What do you think?” she turned away from where we were approaching and swung at the bag again.

  “I think you need to hit something else.” Wes moved over to where he kept his equipment. He grabbed some pads before reaching for her to get her attention. “Come over here,” he tugged lightly and when she looked over at me, confusion written all over her face, I shrugged.

  I had an idea of what was happening here. I didn’t like the idea of my best friend being able to get through to my girl better than I was, but whatever worked I was willing to try. If letting Wes do his thing got Maddie past the anger and nightmares that had plagued her lately, I was all for it.

  “Hit me,” Wes commanded as he placed Maddie in front of him.

  “No,” she shook her head and sighed.

  “Yes, hit me,” he pushed her shoulder a little causing her to stumble back.

  “I’m not going to hit you,” she scowled again. When I saw the silent apology in Wes’s eyes, I knew this was about to get ugly. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to watch, but I knew she was holding back and Wes was going to push her to unleash the anger.

  “Hit me!” He shoved her, this time harder and she almost lost her footing.

  Maddie scowled as she stumbled, and her face reddened. “Why?” she screamed.

  “You need to let it go. Pretend I’m him, and hit me!” Wes relaxed his stance, dropped his arms, the pads long forgotten, and smirked at her. I could see it happen. She snapped, and that little look he gave her took her anger to a whole new level.