Sacred Desires (Samuel #1)

by Joanna Mazurkiewicz

  Dimitrious glances at me and our eyes meet for brief moment. The hardness and disgust that is normally there has vanished. Now there is some gentleness. The baby laughs at me and I force a small smile. When I look at my boss again he is still staring blankly. I have to pull myself together and stop thinking about what I can’t have. It's up to me to make this happen, to be the person that they expect me to be.

  Once we leave the elevator my heartbeat is unsteady. The mother of the baby strolls away, talking to it quietly. Dimitrious is looking at me again.

  "Are we clear now, Poppy?" he asks again. God, I really want to punch him now. I didn't expect him to visit me today in my flat. He showed up when I was still asleep, spreading his white wings in my room. He told me that Rhonda had sensed another Fallen who showed up in one of the restaurants in Kensington. Dimitrious doesn’t think I need a day off. He just barges back to my flat after I went through such a trauma yesterday.

  Here I am, ready for another task.

  Seven

  “I told you, I'm not an idiot. I’m a quick learner and you will have that Fallen’s head under your feet sooner than you think,” I say confidently. Dimitrious nods and mutters something under his breath before he crosses the street, leaving me alone. I keep staring until he disappears in the crowd of people.

  Outside, the frosty air burns my skin. No one pays attention to me. I'm not surprised. I’m my old self, the real Poppy Kowalsky with shiny but ugly red hair and a pale complexion. At least my clothes are still decent.

  As I walk through the busy street I get a text from Rhonda. She wants me to meet her in half an hour for lunch in the restaurant where she had seen a new Fallen briefly before. We need to find any Fallen, but this is going to be so much easier if she has already identified one. I’m not used to being bossed around by someone like her, but this is my life, so I have to obey.

  My hands trembled when images of me in Jason’s arms flash in front of my eyes. I feel disgusted with myself that he used me like that. I don't even remember when he took my clothes off. Everything seems so cloudy, but this is part of the job. If I want to survive I need to get used to being someone’s punching bag, like in the past.

  The restaurant that Rhonda had chosen looks good, exactly what I’m used to. Finally, after days of eating pot noodles, I can have something decent. I smooth my hair walking inside, feeling anxious about my look. I’m not used to it yet.

  "Hello, Poppy," says Rhonda when I approach her table. She is drinking a glass of coke, eyeing me suspiciously. She thinks that I'm going to fuck everything up like the last time. I take a seat and check the menu to see what kind of food is being served here.

  "Hey," I say, forcing a smile. Then I add, "How are you?”

  We both know that I really don't care, but I promised to treat her with respect, so here I am. She tosses her blond hair behind her, frowning.

  "I'm good," she replies with the fake smile. "Good that you're on time, so we can start."

  The waiter approaches and we both order some lunch after studying the menu for some time. I can’t wait to eat something special today. I go for some exotic starter and fish for the main. Rhonda doesn’t approve of wine so early in the morning, but what does she know? She is in her early twenties.

  I look around the restaurant, trying to figure out why she chose this place. A few tables away from us there is a group of ladies in their sixties. Two businesswomen are eyeing the tattooed waiter, wondering if he would fuck them both. Other than that, there are a few couples, so the restaurant isn’t as packed as I expected. Rhonda searches for something in her backpack for a good five minutes. Then she takes out a familiar black pill and swallows it with water.

  “The Fallen that I think I saw here once is dark-haired, very tall with great skin. It's easier to focus on him rather than searching for a new one through the whole of London. Remember, he might appear at any time, so I suggest you be ready," she explains like I’m a little child. “I just want to be sure that I was right before, that he was really here. Whatever you do, do not approach him.”

  “Clear, boss," I reply with obvious sarcasm. The waiter brings us the drinks. I sip some of my wine, enjoying the taste, remembering my evenings with John by the fire. I watch her and then add the second question, knowing that I have to make an effort. "So tell me, Rhonda, how did you end up with a creature like Dimitrious?"

  “Really? Are you genuinely interested or are you playing it because you don’t want to die?" she asks, laughing. Bitch, she got me straight away.

  I narrow my eyes at her, looking away. "Dimitrious gave me clear instructions, so here I am, showing you that I'm interested."

  She flexes her fingers. It looks like Rhonda feels a little on edge talking about this. It’s probably personal. "My mother was killed by one of the Fallen."

  Okay, so now this is going to be uncomfortable. I hate stories like that, but this is my new job. "And that’s why you're helping Dimitrious? So you can have a clear conscience?"

  She stiffens her arms, playing with the fork on the table. "Yeah, something like that." She probably wants them to pay for her mother’s death. At least she has some memories about her parent. I had no one, only a woman who pretended that she cared, but deep down I was one of the hundred other lonely kids.

  "This is more complicated than that. My mother was in love with him. I was a teenager then and I lived with my father, so I had no idea what was happening. He fucked other women while she was pregnant with his child. Yeah, somehow he managed to conceive a child. He used his abilities to put her in a trance, wipe her memory. In the end she couldn’t cope and went crazy, and he strangled her in a fight. I had no idea that he was more than human and that the relationship was so toxic." She continues talking. For some reason I want to know more. This story is sad and it’s a good time to show her that I can be empathetic.

  "When I found out what had happened, I started looking into him more, followed him and people that knew him. His name was Patrick, but I can’t be sure if that’s his real name. My father remarried and didn't care about Mum anyway. Besides, she kept to herself. I was young and naive. It took me a month to track the bastard down, and when I finally did, I nearly died. I had no clue that he wasn’t human, so when I bought a gun and tried to shoot him, he laughed."

  Rhonda closes her eyes for a moment and I am supposed to feel sorry for her, but I don’t feel anything. My parents didn’t want me, so I can’t empathise with her pain.

  "So I guess you didn’t kill him?" I ask.

  "No, he turned the bullet around and shot me. Luckily for me, Dimitrious showed up and saved my life, but the bastard escaped. Apparently he has been tracking him for years. My mother wasn’t the first woman that he had killed. Dimitrious healed me and then tried to wipe my memories, but I think he must have read what I wanted and he changed his mind.”

  "So you started working for him?"

  "Yes, I wanted to help him once I found out who he was. I wasn’t even surprised that there was another world. I didn’t care about heaven and hell as long as I could help. We became a team: I helped him to track Fallen and he killed them. Some of them are cruel and pure evil. You don’t even realise what’s happened to some humans when they didn’t share with a Fallen their deepest desires.”

  I swallow hard, remembering when Dimitrious mentioned, that many Fallen don’t follow any rules. They do what they please. I decide to change the subject quickly enough.

  “Dimitrious is serious about tracking them down of course, but what about his own life? Doesn’t he date?” I ask, smiling. When he’s around I feel lost, but there is an invisible tangled connection between us. I can’t deny it.

  Rhonda doesn’t reply straight away, drinking her coke. A man like him probably wouldn’t go for her, but everyone can dream.

  "He doesn’t care for a woman’s company. Someone took away all his memories and there’s that woman he keeps seeing in his dreams.”

  I’m just about to ask her about the woman,
but the waiter arrives with starters. Two men walk past our table. Rhonda peers at them for longer than she should. I thank the waiter, who stares at my cleavage, imagining me naked.

  I can’t read anything from one of the men, so we know that he must be the one that Rhonda has been talking about. I chew my food slowly, knowing that we just tracked down another Fallen. Men always think about something, mainly sex.

  The two guys choose a table in the back of the restaurant and order drinks straight away. The man without thoughts is strikingly good-looking with dark golden skin and smoky black hair. His eyes wander around the restaurant, checking out most of the women. Rhonda pushes a black pill towards me and I put it my mouth and swallow it fast, trying not to argue about what we should do first. A few seconds later I hear her voice in my head.

  I have an idea. Just follow my lead this time and don’t screw it up.

  I hate when people treat me like an idiot, but I nod just to shut her up. He is the Fallen; his mind is silent.

  Good job, Sherlock, so let’s start this simple game, Poppy. Remember, he can hear better than any other ordinary human, so don't say anything that might ruin our plan.

  I nod again, thinking about the women that he might like, but Rhonda has something completely different in mind. She leans towards me and says, "Did you see that guy who just walked by? He is sizzling hot.”

  Tell me that you don’t think so and that he looks like an arse and you're not interested.

  Okay, so I sort of know what she is doing here. I told Dimitrious that I would listen. She is in charge and I have to obey, even knowing that this is stupid. "I don’t think so, darling. You know me. I like a real man and he looks like an arse with his expensive suit."

  There is no way that he can hear us all the way from his table, but then I remember what Rhonda said earlier.

  Good. Don’t screw this up now. You have his attention. They like challenge.

  “I don’t know. He’s gorgeous and probably single," she mumbles, finishing her food. Now go to the ladies’ room and if he looks at you, pretend like he doesn’t exist.

  Personally I want to tell her that this whole thing sounds ridiculous. Maybe we have touched on that Fallen ego, but my new look will put him off. Rhonda pins me down with her sharp expression. I roll my eyes and get up. My super-high heels are hurting my feet, my dress is tight, but now that I’ve lost my big breasts I don’t feel sexy. We both need to find out his name and come up with a reasonable plan.

  "I’ll pop into the rest room and then we can get the bill," I say with my sweet voice.

  I can see the Fallen on the other side of the restaurant, but he is not looking at me, so Rhonda’s plan is not working. I know how to walk and I choose to do it with grace and elegance, holding my head high. Nothing, I get nothing. The guy in the navy suit does not even glance in my direction. Although his friend is eyeing me intensely.

  Shortly after that, I disappear into the ladies’ room, do my business, wait five minutes and then get back to the table. Rhonda looks disappointed that her plan didn’t work out the way it should.

  He looks confident and he probably can get any woman he wants. Your plan got us nowhere.

  Well, let’s stick to plan B.

  And what’s that?

  Hang around here and wait for them to leave. We need to get his name at least. Besides, his mate is a filthy motherfucker, and he’s thinking about kinky sex with you.

  I shake my head, wondering what the hell is wrong with that guy. Kinky sex is so out of fashion these days.

  The food was delicious and I want to stay a bit longer for a dessert. All the waitresses in the restaurant are glancing towards our identified Fallen, but he doesn’t seem to pay attention to any of them; instead he is scrolling through his BlackBerry. Rhonda is going over our new plan in my head.

  I pretend that I’m listening and when the waiter approaches, I order a chocolate brownie. Rhonda gets annoyed, telling me that I never take her seriously. It looks like she is playing a total bitch for no reason.

  Then something unexpected happens. The Fallen gets up, wiping his mouth with the cloth napkin, and starts walking towards our table. Rhonda doesn’t even see him approaching and is still mumbling about what we should do later. I try to look like I'm surprised, maybe angry even, but deep down I can’t pretend not to feel the growing heat between my breasts. This Fallen is hot, steamy hot. Dark-haired, darker than Dimitrious with a dash of some sort of foreign blood, maybe Arab. He is short but wide in the shoulders with dark hair and a wide jaw. He will do; after all, it’s just another man that I have to sleep with.

  I kick Rhonda under the table, so she can stop muttering shit about the crappy service and notice that we have company.

  "Excuse me; I couldn’t help noticing you from the other side of the restaurant."

  Okay, even I have to admit that he has a sexy voice and alluring smile. My heart starts to beat faster.

  Rhonda stiffens and finally looks up, screaming in my head, Fucking play it cool and pretend that he doesn’t impress you.

  The Fallen looks at me intently with those dark striking eyes.

  I raise my left eyebrow, tossing my red hair behind me. “Really? Is that your pick-up line?” I ask.

  He laughs, moving his eyes down to my cleavage. I purse my lips, letting him know that I’m not happy with him being here.

  "My name is Samuel Jackson and I would love to take you out for dinner, Gorgeous Red."

  Rhonda looks like she is going to have a heart attack, going pale. The Fallen is very forthcoming, but I’m the woman that thinks he is plain rude. I need to play the coldhearted bitch. I’m already cold and emotionally shut down, so that should be easy.

  “I’m not interested,” I reply coldly, trying to keep my pulse steady. “I don’t date overconfident jerks.”

  He looks surprised, but that cheeky smile doesn’t disappear from his handsome face. “Can I convince you otherwise? I don’t like to waste my time and pretend that we need to have a real conversation before I ask you out. I normally do that, but you’re beautiful and I’d like to know you a bit better.”

  Rhonda looks completely startled, and I don’t know if it’s a good sign.

  "I don't think that you're my type, Samuel. I think I’ll pass."

  His eyes darken and his lips part. No other woman has probably ever said no to him and it’s funny to see that he doesn’t want to give up. He shakes his head in disbelief and takes a card out of his pocket, then puts it right in front of me.

  "Please, this is just in case you change your mind, Gorgeous Red," he adds, sending me a confident sexy wink. Then he says, leaning closer and invading my personal space, “We are a great match, trust me.”

  My mind rolls through the overheating stage as he walks away. I look at him for a little while. He sits back down and says something to his mate. They both laugh. After a moment they leave the restaurant. As soon as they are out the door, Rhonda grabs the card on the table, giggling like she has lost her mind.

  "Now, this is what I'm talking about. Once you stab straight into their ego, they turn into a sloppy mash."

  “I didn’t think this would work,” I admit. “I guess you were right.”

  “Well, thank you, Poppy. I need to record this because I think it's the first time that you agreed with me. Dimitrious will be proud of you. He wanted to use compulsion on you, but I stopped him, so you should thank me.”

  I narrow my eyes at her, now knowing why I felt so turned on while Samuel was talking to me. Dimitrious was right; Fallen are not human.

  “Okay, so we have his name, so what’s next? What does this guy do?"

  She passes me a card. It’s black, elegant, and the graphic is impressive. Samuel Jackson, FLD Limited.

  "I have no idea what that means,” I say.

  She frowns, snapping the card away from me. “It doesn’t matter anyway; you're going to take things slowly and make sure he falls in love with you."

  "But I didn’t g
ive him my number and I would have to call him to meet him again."

  "No, you don’t. He wants you, so he will come back for more and when he does, you're going to play hard to get."

  “I hope you’re right because I'm the one that has to seduce him, not you."

  “Well, make sure you do well this time because Dimitrious won’t give you another chance," she reminds me, finishing my wine.

  I sink back into my seat, stabbing at my dessert. I’ve just lost my appetite and dignity. It turns out that the most difficult task is ahead of me.

  Eight

  The next few days move slowly and it looks like Rhonda was wrong about Samuel. He hasn’t showed up, and he has no idea where I live, so her theory doesn't make any sense. This girl obviously has no idea how to pick up men. Samuel is just one of others that I will have to seduce. I can easily find someone else.

  After I come back home from the restaurant I have a nice relaxing bath with more wine. Rhonda asks me to let her know as soon as Samuel makes any contact with me. Unfortunately a couple of days pass and there is no sign of the Fallen. I’m not worried, taking some time away from this whole supernatural nonsense. I watch TV, find the library, and shop, although I’m on a budget. At least I don’t have to worry about Dimitrious. Rhonda must have told him everything that happened in the restaurant, so he is staying away from me. I’m glad that I don’t have to see him.

  I feel better when I don’t have to worry about a schedule. Dimitrious and Rhonda are off my back, so after being at home for two days I decide to have a coffee near my shabby apartment. I wonder why I put up with a little shit like Rhonda. She is much younger than me, barely has any real life experience, and she is trying to teach me a seduction game. Maybe I should poison her like I did Curtis and Edward. Then I would have Dimitrious to myself.